Back at the Institute, Ty led a shivering Kit into their ensuite and sat him down on the edge of the bathtub. Kit folded his arms tightly around himself, grinding his teeth together so they wouldn't chatter. Ty bent over the tub and turned the hot tap on. The sound of water hitting the ceramic bottom of the tub was oddly calming, and Kit focused on that rather than the mortification he felt. What had he been thinking? Not only had he embarrassed himself in front of Ty, but every single person in attendance at the wedding had watched as Ty practically carried him across the beach. Over one hundred Downworlders and Shadowhunters, including Julian and Jace, saw him as he was. They would think him insane, attention-seeking. Julian would never like him again; he'll kick Kit out as soon as he gets back. He'll tell him he's never allowed to see Ty again. Homelessness, Kit can deal with, Julian hating him, he can cope, but never being allowed to see Ty... that would kill him.
He had become so wrapped up in his head that he didn't hear Ty calling his name. Snapping out of his reverie, he focused on Ty's concerned face in front of him
"The bath is ready," Ty said. Kit nodded, a little absentmindedly. He felt as though he was trapped in some hazy dream. He stood up and pulled his button-up shirt over his head without really thinking. Ty made a small noise in protest.
"Huh?"
"I should leave," Ty said quickly, a blush tinting his cheekbones. "The towel is on the radiator. I'll get you some clean clothes." He reached out like he wanted to touch Kit, but dropped his hand just as quickly, and left the bathroom with haste. Kit threw his head back, horrified.
What are you doing, what are you doing? What. are. You. doing?
He undressed quickly, dumping his sodden clothes in the corner, before settling into the boiling hot water. He would have blanched at the heat normally, but his body welcomed the sudden temperature change. Steam billowed out in puffs like smoke rising from a bonfire. He squeezed his eyes shut at the sudden image of Livvy's funeral pyre, the black smoke that drifted from it. He wouldn't let himself fall back into the darkness.
He knew he was supposed to feel happy, happier than he had ever been. In the past few days, he had kissed the love of his life, committed to staying by his side forever. Kit didn't plan on breaking that vow physically, but mentally... Kit wasn't sure was there at all mentally. His body was in the Institute, in the bathroom connected to his and Ty's room, but where was his mind? Back in the ocean, suffocating slowly. Ty wasn't able to pull that out of the water with his body.
But Kit was happy. He just couldn't feel it right now.
He washed himself thoroughly and stayed in the water until it had gone cold. Eventually, he pulled himself out, grabbed the heated towel and entered the bedroom. Ty was sitting on the bed when Kit appeared, a towel wrapped around his waist. He looked up, eyes widening a touch. He opened his mouth in an 'O' of surprise.
"Sorry, I, uh, forgot. To give you your clean clothes," He gestured to the end of Kit's bed, where a pair of jeans and a black tee were folded neatly.
Kit smiled, revelling in Ty's embarrassed face.
He grabbed a smaller towel from the cupboard and rubbed his hair as dry as possible. He dropped the damp towel on the floor and shook his hair out like a dog. Ty shot off of the bed and rushed to grab the towel. Kit moved at the same time, and when Ty stood back up, the top of his head bumped into Kit's stomach. Ty breathed in a little too suddenly. Kit placed a hand on Ty's shoulder and pulled him upright. Ty was a couple of inches taller than Kit, and he loved it.
"You alright?" Kit asked. Ty looked at Kit in shock.
"You shouldn't be the one asking that. What happened on the beach... It really scared me. I was scared for you. The way you spoke, it-it felt like you had fallen down this hole, and I tried to drop a rope down for you, but it was ten feet too short." Ty's eyes shone with tears.
"Oh, Ty. It's alright, I'm fine. I'm out of the hole." Kit sat on his bed, pulling Ty down next to him. "You see, that happens a lot. These freakouts, breakdowns. Normally, I'd have to dig myself out of the hole, and it exhausts me. But you helped. You dropped that rope down, and you may think it wasn't enough, but it was for me. And I'm not tired," Kit linked his hand through Ty's. "In fact, I feel more awake than ever." Kit reached up with his free hand and stroked the side of Ty's face. Ty leant into the touch, pressing a kiss to Kit's palm. It was enough to send bolts of lightning up his arm to his heart. He traced Ty's jawline with his thumb. Ty wrapped his arm around Kit's bare waist, forcing him closer.
"Ty–" Kit started, but Ty shook his head. Kit untangled their hands and wrapped his around the back of Ty's neck. Ty pressed his free hand against Kit's chest, fingers splayed. Kit's heart pounded and he knew Ty could feel it beneath his fingers.
"The last time we did this, your brother walked in," Kit reminded Ty.
"I locked the door. I didn't want anyone coming in while you were in the bath."
Kit laughed under his breath and pulled Ty close enough that he was half sitting on Kit's lap.
"You're so good. I don't deserve you," Kit said. Ty lifted his hand from Kit's chest to his face, his thumb pressing against Kit's bottom lip.
"I want you." It was the most serious Kit thought he'd heard Ty sound and the raw honesty made something inside Kit snap. He pulled Ty fully onto his lap and yanked his mouth down to meet his. Ty gasped and straightened his back, making himself even taller than Kit. Kit leaned up to keep his lips pressed to Ty's. Ty's arms moved around Kit's neck, and Kit's fingers went to the buttons on Ty's shirt. With an ease that surprised him, the buttons undid quickly and seamlessly. Kit pushed up against Ty, yanking the shirt off and throwing it to the floor. He broke apart from Ty to take in a breath and looked up at him. Ty was smiling brightly down at him. Kit ducked his head in the crook of Ty's neck, leaving butterfly kisses everywhere he could reach. Ty threw his head back, giving Kit more leeway. Kit ran his hands up and down Ty's back, relishing the feeling of Ty's warm skin against his own. Kit's kisses got harder, more desperate. He kissed the same spot on Ty's neck over and over again, scraping his teeth gently over it and making Ty gasp.
"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" He asked. Ty looked at Kit, his eyes dark with an emotion Kit had never seen before. He kissed Kit hard, gently pushing him down so that he was lying fully on the bed, Ty on top of him. Ty's mouth moved from Kit's mouth to his jaw, kissing along his jawline, down his neck, across his collarbone. Kit arched upwards, his finger pressing deeper into Ty's back. Ty moved down Kit's body, kissing down the middle of his chest. Ty's hands found themselves against Kit's arches back, pulling Kit further upwards A small noise escaped Kit's mouth and he cringed at the involuntary action. Ty laughed against Kit's stomach, the sound vibrating up Kit's body. Kit ran his hands up Ty's back and through his hair, tugging desperately at the dark strands. The entire world fell away from Kit as Ty kept making his way slowly down Kit's body. The towel that had been wrapped around his waist had slipped slightly, deliberately or not, Kit wasn't sure.
Heaven. This was heaven. This was the Angel's way of saying 'Hey Kit, I'm sorry I've screwed you over multiple times, you deserve this buddy.'
Suddenly, Ty's face was above his again. Kit hadn't realised how heavily he had been breathing. The anticipation of Ty's mouth was burning him up inside. Ty was pressed against Kit's body, one of his legs curled underneath one of Kit's. The towel had unravelled almost completely.
"We should be taking this slow, right?" Kit breathed, keenly aware of how quickly this day had turned.
"I don't know, I've never done this before. It feels good though. Right."
"It does," Kit said and kissed Ty again, stroking one hand down the length of Ty's chest and stomach, until his fingers curled around his trousers.
"Is this okay?" Kit asked. Ty nodded and Kit undid the button on his trousers, pulled the zipper down and tried to yank the trousers down. Ty giggled at Kit and pulled himself away so that he was sitting up. He pulled his legs from Kit and wrapped each one around Kit's sides so he could straddle him. Kit watched breathlessly as Ty removed his trousers and flung them behind him. He winced slightly when he heard something fall from one of his shelves. Kit laughed and ran his fingers up and down Ty's sides, leaving goosebumps in his wake.
"You're so beautiful," Kit breathed. Ty blushed.
"This is very new to me," Ty said quietly.
"Me too. Despite my incredible looks and smooth-talking, I've never had this with anyone. I've never wanted to have this with anyone but you." Kit wasn't completely sure what 'this' was, but it didn't matter to him anymore. They were whatever Ty wanted them to be. And Ty leaned down and kissed Kit tenderly. Kit ran his hands over Ty's boxers, hands landing at the top of his thighs. His hands hovered slightly away from his body, waiting for permission, which Ty gave him when he kissed him harder. Kit let his hands fall onto the backs of Ty's thighs. His legs were firm with muscles, and it made Kit slightly self-conscious of his own, however, that fell away as quickly as it had arrived when Ty's lips found his again, again, again. How Kit's hands found new parts of Ty to touch, each time waiting for Ty to say no. Ty's replies came in hot kisses all over Kit's body, each one bringing them closer and closer together until Kit wasn't sure where he started and Ty began. They were one person, moving in perfect sync, fit perfectly together. Ty was the final piece of the puzzle for Kit. Without him, Kit would never be complete.