AUTHORS NOTE 8-1-2022: A Resilient Queen (Book 3 of the trilogy) is being updated now on patreon!!!!
There might be some mistakes
POV: Caden
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"Father, may I come back to the castle?" Breathing deeply my paws barely hold my body up. "Please father, I need to find her. Reading those letters give me a tiny bit of insight of her. It's not enough, I crave...no need more."
Why am I not allowed inside the castle? It's been six hours and twenty two minutes since he kicked me out.
I won't be able to survive much longer dodging the many trees occupying the royal forest. It doesn't matter who you are, no wolf can go on forever.
"You may."
Without another thought, I head straight towards the tree hiding our clothes. Nik and Jason following sluggishly. Our bodies ached in places we haven't used in months. As a prince I'm not allowed to run perimeter with Jason and Nik's men.
Once dressed in only our shorts we head up the royal family room.
If I desire to go for a run, either Nik or Jason have to accompany me. I despise it. Though I do understand the rule.
As a young child I would escape the castle walls to run my anger away.
One night my father couldn't find me and had the castle in an uproar. The only heir to the thrown missing scared the people. It took the royal guards nearly four hours to find my hiding spot.
From that night on I had to have guards follow my every movement. My parents were afraid I would harm either myself or a passerby.
I hated not having my mate in my arms. Other young males had theirs. Jealousy raged deep inside my heart. I didn't care who I told off or disrespected.
They were able to give their mates flowers, taking them dancing or to the movies. While I stood back and watched with a dead heart. Screaming into my pillow at night did me no good. The anger only grew until one night I threw a fit.
My father ordered me to go out and have fun with my friends. I replied back with, "I hate you, I wish I was never your son". The look on his face to this day haunts me.
I was an angry teenager. Wanting the one thing I couldn't have because of my own actions. I rebelled against my parents. Jason and Nik barely held me back. Murder entered my mind on a few occasions.
By the time I hit seventeen all werewolves knew my mate had run from me. If I travelled outside the castle, couples would taunt their relationships in my face. Kissing, hugging and staring into each other's eyes. Men would hold their mate's possessively around the waist. Not letting her go. Women would smirk at single ladies passing by. Shoving it in their faces that they had a mate.
I wanted to kill them all. If I couldn't have mine, why should they have theirs?
Then reason would kick in and tell me it's my fault not theirs. They didn't speak horrible words to frighten their mate away.
I didn't know the meaning of love at the age of fifteen. Not having my mate taught me hardships. Taking it out on my father or any person nearby became my daily routine.
"Take a shower first Caden. Dinner will be served in our family room. We will discuss what to do next." He issues a small command through his words. Entering the castle I head towards my bedroom. Jason hot on my heals.
What I'm going to do next is read every single letter until I find enough clues to who she is. If that doesn't work then I will hunt down Jessica and torture her until I find out what I yearn for.
"We will teach her a lesson after we find our love," Marcus growls in my head.
He has been quiet for such a long time, it shocked me to hear his voice.
"Yes we will. She has forced my hand. Kept vital letters from us."
"If she hadn't we could have had our mate in our arms five years ago." Stopping in my tracks I realize how right his words are. Five years' worth of love and companionship gone because Jessica wanted the crown for herself.
"She has it in her mind you want her as your Queen. By keeping her for more than one night stand you gave her proof. Why would you keep a female longer than a night if you weren't planning on making her your second choice mate?" Marcus used to be the sane voice in my head, until not having our mate took a toll on him. He cut me off unless I desperately needed him.
He blamed me, as he should.
"Caden?" Looking around I come to see Jason staring at me oddly. "You alright? You stopped all of a sudden and haven't moved for a few minutes."
"Marcus spoke to me." Continuing onto my way I pass Jason. His mouth wide open.
"He spoke to you?" Chasing after me, he follows me up the stairs to my room. "About what? It's been nearly a year hasn't it?"
"One week after my birthday last year. Once I continued to sleep with Jessica he shut me out. He informed me that if I continued to take my anger out in the bedroom he would ignore me." He kept his word. I had begged for him to speak to me, even if it was in anger. Not having a conversation with him left me feeling hollow. Marcus is a part of me, my other half.
"It was a stupid move on your part dude. I can't believe you would purposely lose your wolf to bang a girl. Which isn't your own mate."
Growling, I punch him in the gut. "Shut up Jason. I damn well know what idiotic I was. You don't need to rub it in my face every chance you get."
Walking into my room, I slam the door in his face.
"Don't be furious at me Caden. I'm not the one who sleep with other females for five plus years while knowing my mate would find out," Jason said through the door.
Leaning against the said door, I bang my head. I'm a complete failure. Not only to her, but to my friends, family and pack mates.
An Alpha is supposed to show other's how to act. Sleeping around behind your mates back isn't what I want to teach young wolves. If they see their Prince sleeping around, it will give them the idea that it's alright. In the end I'll be hurting more females with my actions.
"We will find her Caden. I sense her birthday is near," Marcus said.
"How?" Shaking my head I try to figure out what he means. Jumping into the shower I scrub all the dirt and grime off my body. The need to read the rest of the letters mounting.
"I have a feeling. It's as if her wolf is silently calling out to me. Warming me that they are close by."
"That's not possible Marcus." Punching the wall I try not to break my fist. Why is my own wolf messing with me now!
"Tell me about it." Snarling I feel the full wait of his anger. "Dammit Caden, I feel her. Her paw is inches away from mine. Always inches away. Never touching. I will not mate another. You may pass your twenty-fifth birthday for all I give a damn. We are in this situation because of your actions Caden. Either take responsibility or I will completely take over and you will be inside my head for the rest of your life."
Gulping my eyes widen. He wouldn't lock me away would he?
"Yes, I would."
Shit! Jumping out of the shower, I shakily dry off and get dressed. I need to fix this. Maybe make a public apology. Would she come forward? How would I apologize? What would I say?
"I'm sorry I've been a complete douche bag. You may whip me into shape. Band me from your body. Curl me around your little finger until you deem me worthy of your touch. Beat the living day light out of me until I'm a puddle of blood at your feet. Make me play bingo with a much of old ladies. Oh, I know...kick me in the family jewels."
Running through the family room door, I stare horror struck at my parents and friends.
"Caden are you alright?" My mother stands up worried.
My wolf has gone insane.
"Your damn straight I have. Until we have her safe and sound in our arms I will make your life a living hell."
Did I do this to him? Push him over the edge?
"Do we have a genius with us or what?"
"Shut it Marcus!" I scream at him. Gripping my head I scream out loud.
"Caden?" Warm hands clutch mine. "Sweetheart what's wrong?" Why is she being nice to me? Doesn't she realize what a horrible man I've become? She should be extremely disappointed in me.
"Son?"
Falling to the ground I clasp my hair. Why me? Why did I deserve this?
"Maybe because only an evil child would threaten to flog his own soul mate!"
"I didn't mean it. I was only trying to sound tough Marcus. I didn't mean any of it." Tears break free. The dam I've been building up, finally exploded. "Why couldn't I have kept my mouth shut?"
"Oh sweetheart. Don't do this. Not now," mother whispers softly. Her hands brushing tenderly through my hair. "We are close. Clues are adding up. We haven't stopped reading the letters. Come, my dear."
"Marcus you need to lay off Caden. If you continue to taunt him he won't be able to function. You do want to find you mate correct?"
Snarling, Marcus keeps his thoughts to himself. My father had a way with him. For years now he has had to calm him down. Without our mate present Marcus becomes hostile, annoying and downright rude.
"Caden come and see what we have come up with." Sitting down on a couch she hands me a sheet of paper. "All details your father and I came across we wrote down for you to read."
Quickly snatching it out of her hand I read over it with soaring hope.
Clues:
- Loves to go running in the forest with her brother and two best friends
- Best friends are both males
- One male is in the military and the other is a servant
- She lives with her parents in the castle
- The four of them have served in the castle since birth as has their grandparents
- Her natural hair is brown, she dyed it black after the ball
- She has blue eyes
- She watches from the shadows
- Her military friend knows you personally
- You won't be happy when you find out who the military friend is
- She loves pizza, soda, salads and pesto spaghetti
- She will try any food once
- She rarely leaves the castle grounds in fear of running into you
- The four of them meet up at least a three times a week to sneak around the castle to spy on the women you bang
- Every single time your sexually active with a female it breaks her heart, pushing her further away from you
- Piece by piece her heart is ripped from her chest
- She cries herself to sleep at night
- She believes she will never be worthy of your love, that all you want is a beautiful female at your side; not her
- She can't sleep by herself because she gets nightmares of you marrying another
- She has kept faithful to you, never dating or even kissing another
- She believes you will only crave her because of the mate bond
- She has loved you for many years, too scared to come forth believing you will shove her away because of her status and looks
"She loves me?" The last bullet point runs through my mind over and over again.
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Authors Note: Thank you once again for reading. I hope you enjoyed it as much as i did writing it.
Visit my facebook page to see sneak peeks of the up and coming chapters.
https://www.facebook.com/TessaThompsonBooks
Chapter Questions: What do you think she will say in her letters.
Will Nik give himself away when Caden reads her letters?