A/N—Drew this pic of Japeth (left) and Aric (right). Does anyone else think Aric kinda looks like an old man?? ;)
"You are the best and worst of me...Always."
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—ARIC'S POV—
The sky was gray, and clouds had begun to billow overhead; a stark comparison of last night's weather which had been dark yet alight with stars. Last night had been peaceful. It was the sort of peace Aric had never thought he would ever have in his screwed up life.
That was until Rhian had stuck his business where it didn't belong. Rhian had hated Aric ever since Aric and Japeth had become friends. Rhian had seen Japeth and Aric on the rooftop of the school and had become angry—angry enough for Japeth to run after him.
Aric had gone down from the roof to eavesdrop on their conversation, only to hear Rhian blatantly call him names, to say that him and Japeth's friendship was nothing more but a lie.
But it wasn't Rhian's words that had made Aric sheath his dagger, to attack him so cruelly. No. The thing that made him really mad was seeing the crestfallen look on Japeth's face. It was the look of a broken boy who'd been rejected too many times by his brother for some misunderstood friendship when all the boy wanted was his brother's love, his understanding.
Japeth loved Rhian, he was his family after all. But Japeth cared for Aric too, and it was this strange cycle of love and hate that made the twins feud.
But seeing Japeth's face—his mouth curled downwards and those blue skies glistening with emotion like a storm was about to come brewing—Aric couldn't keep his anger at bay.
Aric had to attack Rhian. He'd had to defend Japeth, his only friend, against a brother who only saw him as a damaged person who had to be fixed. He had to to protect Japeth, to show Rhian that he'd had enough of his judgmental views.
But Aric should've known that every action had a consequence. Now, Aric had to face those consequences.
Rhian had been tended to in the School's infirmary while Aric had been forced to haul up in the dining room with two Foxwoods guards posted at the door so he wouldn't escape.
Aric hoped to see Japeth again, but his friend never returned to see him. Aric recalled Dean Burnhilde's words. She'd said he could no longer be a student in Arbed.
Months ago, Aric would've rejoiced at the epiphany that he'd be leaving Arbed House. But those months ago, when he'd first arrived to Arbed, he hadn't befriended Japeth yet.
Leaving Arbed House meant leaving his friend behind. A friend Aric had never thought he'd find. The cruelty of it all was weighing down upon Aric's heart like a thorn piercing into it.
He couldn't hear what Dean Burnhilde was discussing with Miss Miyflower or the rest of the Foxwood School's staff, but through the window of the room, he could see the Dean and the other adults arguing.
It wasn't until what felt like an hour had passed that the double doors to the dining room opened and Dean Burnhilde walked in, her face impassive. Aric lurched to his feet when she approached.
"I'm afraid your actions last night have brought great consequences, Aric," The Dean said, stopping in front of him. Her gaze met his and Aric realized it was the first he'd seen the Dean so frazzled. "Your expulsion has been voted on by the insistence of myself and Miss Miyflower. The students all voted you to be banished for the betterment of Arbed House. Only one stepped up to your defense. But alas, it was six against one and numbers don't lie."
Aric felt as if his heart had been ripped from his chest and he opened his mouth to say something, but he was speechless, overcome by emotion.
The only person who ever truly cared about him was Japeth. Japeth would've defended him for his actions. He was the only one who'd voted that Aric stay in Arbed, but Japeth's attempts were futile.
"It's time," Dean Burnhilde announced. Her tone was deep and serious, a stark comparison to her usual gooey voice.
The guards posted at the door moved to herd Aric like a prisoner through the halls before they emerged outside. The pale sunlight blinded Aric's vision as he stepped down the familiar steps where he remembered having lunches with Japeth. But the blueberry bushes growing beside the steps appeared bare of berries. In fact, everything seemed different than what it was yesterday.
Maybe it was all in Aric's head, but he couldn't shake the foreboding feeling curling in his gut as he was led to the edge of the lawn. There, huddled beneath the trees, were the other boys in Arbed; Jach, Hemwa, Asmodeus, and Mika all looking hostile with their scowls directed at Aric as he was forced forward.
Than, Aric spotted those familiar blue skies boring into him, and he lurched forward to grab Japeth.
"Aric..." Japeth whispered, looking so crestfallen that it made Aric become overwhelmed by brief sternness.
Had Japeth forgotten what Aric had told him just hours ago with the moon boring down on them. That boys shouldn't allow their sadness to overwhelm them?
But seeing Japeth's glistening gaze, Aric couldn't speak, and chose to remind Japeth of his mistake through action by reaching for him.
Aric curled his fingers around Japeth's wrist to yank him closer, expression stern. That was when he looked over Japeth's shoulder to find his best friend's exact copy looming against a tree with Kei at his side for support, green blue eyes dancing with fire.
It was than and there, seeing Japeth's incompetent twin, that Aric felt something in him snap.
"You!" Aric snarled, fists twitching to punch Rhian across his already bruised face, but Japeth's sudden grip on his shoulders stopped him.
Rhian had a bandage wrapped around his head, skin clean of blood, yet his clothes were ruffled and streaked with dirt—the only indication that he'd been in a squabble just hours ago.
"I couldn't miss this," Rhian wheezed, voice hoarse as he fixed Aric with an equally steely expression. He tried to step forward, but staggered and was caught by a ready Kei.
Aric felt his grasp on Japeth's arm tighten like a vice as Japeth tried to pull away. "Aric, don't—"
But Aric's gaze was glued on Rhian, a scowl etched across both of the boys' faces. Even Kei looked angry, dark eyes storming in contempt.
"I couldn't miss watching you be banished," Rhian hissed, straightening himself. "After what you did to me, to Japeth, the boy you called your friend...Do you have anything to say in your defense? Do you want to apologize for attempting to murder me right in front of my own brother?"
Aric felt his blood boil like lava as he took in the sneer on Rhian's lips, heard the venom dripping from Rhian's words, and he fought the urge to pounce at Rhian.
Apology? Rhian wanted an...'Apology!' As if!
Aric chuckled darkly, violet eyes pinned on Rhian's face. He moved to take a step forward and saw the steeliness in Rhian's expression shift to worry. He felt a sliver of satisfaction at the sight, and his lips curled upwards into a smirk.
"You wouldn't have rested until I was dead," Rhian lashed out, anger overcoming him once more as he pointed an accusing finger at Aric. "Well, my last wish for you is that you live with your miserable self, and always remember that I'm still alive and you failed to kill me. Remember that I'm the one who won and you lost. And I hope that realization might just haunt you forever."
Aric felt himself bristle, fists curled in anger until his whole body was trembling with rage, gaze scorching through Rhian's face. He wanted to lunge at him, finish the deed, but there was only one thing--one boy--holding him back; Japeth. His touch was firm, but gentle, and looking into Japeth's blue eyes, seeing the despondency in his friend's gaze and feeling his scales caress against his skin in comfort, Aric felt his heart darken a shade at the thought of tomorrow. Tomorrow, Aric would no longer be in Arbed House. He would no longer be able to sneak out with Japeth, sit on the roof with him confessing all their terrible secrets, or eat on the stairs at lunch. But most of all, Aric wouldn't be able to just have Japeth by his side, Japeth who'd become Aric's home in a way, his best friend, the only person Aric had ever come to truly trust. Than what did he have left after all of that was gone? Anger, hatred, sadness?
Aric felt his hand wrap around Japeth's, their fingers intertwining like two halves of a broken heart finally becoming whole. But Aric wouldn't let himself break, he couldn't. All his life he'd had the belief that weakness was wrong, that you needed to cut out your pain in order to be strong. But Aric now saw that once upon a time, Japeth had been his strength, his support...But now, Japeth was his weakness, because Aric knew without a doubt that he was going to miss Japeth and that grief would only distract him. But how could he ever bring himself to let go of the one person who he was the most closest too?
"You're the best and the worst of me, Always..." Aric whispered, gaze boring into Japeth's with a look of contempt despite the raw pain threatening to envelope him whole. He pressed his lips to Japeth's ear, struggling not to let the emotion show in his violet gaze. "But because you're the worst of me, I see now that you're not worth it." Aric forced himself to pull away from Japeth to find that his friend's cold blue eyes were wide in confusion and desperation.
"You're not worth my tears. You're not worth a single goodbye," Aric spat, praying Japeth wouldn't see the truth behind his violet eyes. He'd rather have Japeth hate him forever than grieve his absence. He wanted Japeth to be strong without him, not weak like a broken boy who'd let his emotions consume him. "You're nothing."
Japeth stared at him, face full of disbelief before Aric saw the emotion fade away to reveal little by little, realization. Japeth knew what Aric was trying to do, Japeth could see past all of Aric's lies, strip him of his armor to reveal Aric's true self. He was the only one who could really, and that's one reason why it was gonna be so hard to let him go. But Aric couldn't leave yet without telling Japeth one last thing, without making one last attempt at making Japeth hate him forever even if Aric despised the idea with his whole being.
"When I leave, I won't truly be gone," Aric said, thrusting his face into Japeth's so Japeth would see the hatred in his gaze. Aric pressed a finger to Japeth's temple and lowered his voice to a deep hiss, "I'll be in there, in your head, haunting you day and night like a plague and you'll never erase me."
"You don't mean that," Japeth snapped, voice so cold, Aric flinched. "You're just scared of showing what you'll really feel once you're gone from here. I get it, Aric. I do. Pain is weakness and you can't afford that because all your life you were angry, so goddamn angry because of something that happened in the past when the one person you thought you could trust completely had abandoned you like a coward. Don't you tell me the only person you can trust now is your self because that's a lie and you know it. We trusted each other, you and I. But now that you're losing me, you feel as if that trust we used to have is broken, because now we won't have each other to turn to anymore. And I'm sorry, Aric! I'm sorry that you feel that I should hate you, but I won't. I could never hate you for as long as I lived, and I will miss you. You can't stop that because nobody can choose who they miss or love or hate, and you can't just decide that for me."
Aric was too stunned to respond, his anger slowly fading to be replaced by yearning. He yearned to stay, he yearned to keep Japeth at his side no matter what it took. He didn't want to leave Arbed behind with only the memories of Japeth in his mind and the dagger he'd failed to kill Rhian with. And Japeth was right. Aric had trusted Japeth despite his broken trust with his mother who'd left him behind like trash. But now like Lady Lesso had left him behind, Aric was leaving Japeth behind too. Was this how Aric's mother felt when she abandoned him? Was she forced to leave her precious boy behind, or did she do it on her own accord?
Honestly, Aric didn't care about the reason behind his mother's abandonment. All he cared about was taking in every single detail of Japeth's face, so he would always remember what his old friend looked like: Japeth's snowy white skin, his soft wild copper hair, and his deep icy blue eyes like the clearest blue skies one ever did see. The pain in Aric's heart only flourished as he drank in Japeth's familiar face, knowing this might as well be the last time Aric was ever going to see him again.
And as if Japeth knew exactly what Aric was thinking, the paler twin stepped forward, closer to Aric as if to bathe in his bodily warmth one last time. He stared at Aric, gaze flickering from pain to frustration as he opened his mouth to speak again.
"It hurts to feel the feelings that I feel for you because they're so strong, " Japeth murmured, ignoring Rhain's burning glare on his back as he brushed his cold fingers across Aric's cheekbone. "It's like you burn a fire in my darkened soul that I don't wanna put out. Those flames of passion are eating me, threatening to consume me whole. But the thought of letting you go even though I know that's what's right...it petrifies me. I don't want you to go. I don't want this moment to pass us by, leaving us only with the memories to hold onto. But you're right...I have to let you go, Aric. And I want you to know that I forgive you for what happened. And no matter what I need you to remember that I'll find you, Aric. After all of this over, I'll come look for you and we'll be together again. I Promise..."
Aric felt as if a cold hand had wrapped around his throat to choke the breath from his lungs, and he felt as if a giant weight was resting on his shoulders, threatening to pull him down. He couldn't breathe, couldn't think properly with those damn blue eyes scorching through his soul, stripping him of his anger. And he knew he was going to remember this single moment forever, standing before Japeth, wishing this was all some terrible nightmare they could wake up from.
But Aric was awake now. He couldn't close his eyes and wish this situation away. This was reality, and the reality was was that Aric was leaving now, and as much he hated it, he was helpless against that. There was nothing he could do, him nor Japeth could do, to change that.
This was happening, and it scared Aric more than he could ever know. The worst part about this whole scenario was that Japeth had forgiven Aric. But did Aric truly deserve Japeth's forgiveness after what he did?
Aric had tried his hardest to kill Rhian, to make him pay for hurting Japeth, for all his cruel judgmental views. But he failed. Aric had attacked his best friend's brother—Japeth's brother—and now Aric had to pay the price for his misdeed.
That's why Japeth was better than Aric. Because Japeth would rather miss Aric than be mad at him, he'd rather forgive Aric and would still want him to stay than to watch him be banished forever. That's why Aric was worse because he'd done something terrible and he only regretted it just a little bit. So maybe Aric truly deserved to be banished after all even if Rhian said some awful things about him.
"Come with me," Aric blurted, voice coming out hoarse as he stared into Japeth's face. Aric's hand gripping tighter onto Japeth's was the only indication of desperation that Aric would show. He wasn't ready to plead and show Rhian that he'd won, that he'd won Japeth over again now that Aric was to be banished.
For the first time, Aric felt despondent as he stared back at his only friend. Once, seeing Japeth's face gave Aric hope, but now, seeing Japeth's face only brought a sense of overwhelming anguish Aric never asked to feel in the first place.
The black haired boy wanted nothing more but to have Japeth come with him. They would kill Aric's mother together as long as Japeth agreed to it.
But suddenly, Japeth's bottom lip quivered and he didn't even have to shake his head for Aric to know Japeth's answer to his proposal. Japeth's gaze flickered to the ground in shame as he released a breathy sigh. "I...I can't," He whispered, but he leaned closer to Aric as if to say yes and that he was clearly conflicted over this. "I'm sorry, Aric...Rhian's my brother, my twin. I can't leave him behind."
Aric faltered, emotion seeping through his steely gaze as he swallowed hard, struggling to compose himself. Japeth's refusal to join him was the last straw, the last bit of icing on top of a bittersweet cake. It felt like a knife had pierced Aric's heart and twisted painfully in its position. He was speechless, staring into Japeth's gaze in utter disbelief and completely frozen in shock.
Japeth would truly choose to stay with Rhian, the brother who treated him like trash, than to be with Aric, his only friend. But that was the difference between Rhian and Aric. Rhian was blood and Aric was...well, not blood. And maybe bonds of blood were rooted much deeper than month long friendships.
That's when Aric knew he was to be alone once more. He had to go on by himself and pretend that the one person who'd made him feel good didn't exist, because forgetting Japeth felt much easier than holding onto him.
There was nothing that would change that. That was the inevitable truth.
"Aric Lesso," Dean Burnhilde was the one who spoke, stepping forward to stare at Aric. Her eyes blazed in anger, but there was a hint of unease there too as if she was still shaken up by Aric's horrible actions. "Never in my twenty years of being Dean of Arbed have I had to take such drastic measures against a rebel student. You have shown to be disobedient and unreliable in Foxwood school, and I cannot allow you to roam freely in Arbed where you can harm anyone else. As Dean, I must think of the safety of my students, and so, with a heavy heart, I hereby banish you from Arbed House and from FoxWood. If you ever step foot on school grounds again, you'll be handed over to the authorities."
Aric watched Dean Burnhilde turn to nod authoritatively at the two royal guards standing nearby. "Take him away," the Dean ordered them, and the two knights stepped towards Aric, hands at the ready in case he tried to resist.
"Aric!" Japeth's cry tore through Aric's eardrums, and he looked back at his old friend whose blue eyes were wide in tears.
Aric opened his mouth to say something when the two guards grabbed his shoulders and began to lug him away, shoving him forward as Aric struggled to look back at Japeth one second longer. Their hands were torn out of each other's grips like Aric's last shreds of hope dwindling to nothing.
"No! You can't take him!" Japeth pleaded, trying to chase after Aric being dragged away, but another guard held him back as he thrashed about, desperation in his pained gaze. "Please! Don't take him! Aric!"
But Aric couldn't move. He couldn't think any longer, and all he could feel was the pain. The Raw, overwhelming pain that burst through him as the guards hauled him away. The last thing he saw was Japeth, his face ghostly pale, cheeks streaked with tears, and blue eyes burning through his soul before those specks of blue slowly faded like a candle snuffing out as FoxWood receded behind him.
As much as Aric tried to free himself from the guards' grips, it was to no avail. He couldn't possibly take on two fully grown men at once. Aric could only slump in defeat and let the guards drag him along.
It wasn't long before the guards reached the border of FoxWood. They forced Aric past the border and deeper into the woods at the edge of the kingdom, where they than dumped him in a clearing and left. Aric could hear them laughing to each other as they walked away, and he felt anger boil inside him as he glared at their backs. It was clear they didn't give a crap about their jobs or else they wouldn't be so harsh with him and treat him as a piece of trash than an actual human being.
Aric wanted to scream as he felt unrelenting anger burn through him like lava turning his blood scorching hot. He gnarled his fists and screwed his eyes shut in frustration as if doing so would keep his despair at bay.
In the company of the shaded trees, Aric tipped his head to the cloudy sky and released a cry that shook the forest, the sounds of his despair and anger echoing in his ears.
Somehow through his boiling rage, a single thought flickered through his mind and for a fleeting moment, Aric's cry softened and receded as a strange calm overtook him. Lady Lesso was his path now...He would be sure to destroy her just as Japeth encouraged him to do.
Perhaps it'd be one last gift to Japeth, the boy Aric would miss more than anything else.
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3 Updates in One? You're welcome! This chapter tho is probably the most saddest chapter tho, so I'm sure I've made some of you cry. 🥺 But tell me your thoughts in the comments and don't forget to vote! Thanks for reading!
—Alexis Peters 🥰