The school's courtyard is buzzing with students. They sit along the flowerbeds, under the trees where the picnic tables are, and in the softest tufts of grass. The weather seems to be slowly warming up more than it had been.
I watch everyone from against the wall nearest the door, wondering what they could possibly be so happy about. I wonder what the causes of their smiles are, what are the subjects of their conversations? Where did they come from and where are they going?
It dawns on me that this is something Layla would say. She's always paying attention to the people around her. It also dawns on me that I'm just sitting here staring at the students I go to school with. Not weird at all.
The words from Layla's room earlier come back to my mind, and I wonder if I will ever be worthy of the way she thinks of me. She truly tries to see the best in people; even people like me who don't deserve even a smile half the time. She gives her whole entire heart, even when she cannot afford to.
"Hey," I hear someone say. I recognize her voice a second after she speaks, but I don't look up.
When I don't answer her, she sits down beside me, not taking her eyes off me. I begin to grow annoyed to the point where I just want to get up and leave, but something keeps me there. Her opinion matters too much. She's made me see that the way I've treated people in the past is not the way I should.
As she would say, what would Jesus do?
I turn my head to look at Casey. She smiles and it's almost like she's a different person.
"Yeah?" I ask, attempting to not show what I actually feel towards her. Pure aggravation.
Her smiles slightly falters. "So, where's that girlfriend of yours?" I want to laugh. She almost sounds... concerned.
I take a deep breath in and let it out. "She's stable. Currently getting checked out." I make sure not to go into too much detail. Who knows what this girl is capable of?
She nods her head slowly. "I've known Layla for years. We used to be kind of close, you know? But... she never told me she was sick."
I glance at her through the corner of my eyes, unsure of how serious she is. For the first time since I met her, Casey looks nervous. She wriggles her hands together as she looks ahead.
"You should go see her." My own words surprise me. Any other time, Casey would have been my type. I would have liked her; but Layla wormed her way into my life without even trying, and with her help, I saw the real Casey.
But is there a reason Casey is the way she is? Is there a reason she treats people the way she does like there was a reason I acted the way I did – and still do?
Casey hesitates for a while, her eyes going from the ground to the sky. "I doubt she'd want to see me."
"Layla is a forgiving person. If she wasn't, she and I would not be together, that's for sure."
Casey looks at me now, her face a mixture of anxiety and disappointment.
"She is a good person. I know she is. I just..."
I push myself up from the ground and stick my hand out for Casey to take. She reaches for it a moment later and allows me to help her up. We both dust off our uniforms.
"Whatever it is between you two, Layla will be happy to talk to you about it. Peacefully. I think that's all she's wanted."
Casey lowers her gaze from mine. "Yeah. Maybe I'll stop by."
I nod my head though she doesn't see me. "Cool. I'll see you later?"
To my surprise, she grins. "Sure. Oh, and Jonah?"
"Yeah?"
"You should really learn to tie your tie. Layla can't do everything for you." She flicks the end of my loosely-tied tie as she walks away.
I can't help but smile. I do need to figure that out.
*
"You're sure you want to go with me?" I ask Jordan one more time as walk up the steps towards the entrance of the hospital.
Jordan sighs loudly. "Really, Jonah? We're already here. I told you before that I was fine with coming along. Do you not want me to come, or something?" A smirk suddenly grows on her lips. "Are planning to confess your love?"
I roll my eyes and elbow her so that she stumbles along the wall. She laughs aloud, earning us stares from a few nurses passing by us. Once we reach Layla's room, I knock gently on the edge of the open door and peek my head around. I find her sitting up in her bed with a chapter book in hand. She drags her eyes away from the page she's on to look over at me standing in the doorway.
A smile spreads erupts on her face, but even her attempt at that is slow. I notice just how tired and pale she looks, like she hasn't slept in a year. Even her usually pink lips are drained of color. Yet her eyes are still a vibrant brown, never ceasing their glow.
I walk into the room, Jordan following behind. When I reach her, I lean down and kiss her forehead before I take a seat in the chair next to the bed. Jordan stands beside me awkwardly.
"I hope you don't expect me to greet you like that," Jordan jokes; her usual way of breaking the ice.
It makes Layla laugh though, which brings a smile to my face.
Jordan continues, seeming to grow more comfortable. "How are you feeling, Layla?"
Layla pushes herself up straighter and adjusts the oxygen tube that is stuck under her nose and around her ears. "I've been better if I'm being honest."
Jordan presses her lips together. She sits down gently on the edge of Layla's bed, taking up just enough room for her small body to fit on. She must be scared of hurting Layla.
"Oh..." A smirk crosses Jordan's face after a moment, replacing her concerned eyes. "I bet if Moose were here, he would make you feel better. He has that effect on people."
Layla nods her head. "I would love for you to bring him to see me. I bet he's gotten really big."
"Oh my gosh," Jordan exaggerates. "He's so heavy and big now. It's funny though because he doesn't realize it. For some reason, he likes to walk between your legs like a cat when he greets you at the door. It's the cutest thing ever."
"Yeah, until you trip over him and almost crack your phone in the process," I chime in. Jordan laughs at that and jabs her thumb in my direction.
"Moose has also turned into a comedian. Does the funniest things to this dork."
I make sure to roll my eyes at that one. Jordan suddenly jumps into more conversation, changing the subject from school to teachers to our mom – anything but what's really on all of our minds.
Jordan suddenly pauses after Layla says something about having to take filler classes every year but making sure they could benefit her. I catch a nervous look on Jordan's face and straighten up, waiting to see what she has to say.
Jordan glances quickly at me and then back at Layla as if trying to see if I'm paying attention. "Do you know if they have any creative writing classes?" She glances at me again like she's trying to imagine I'm not here.
Layla smiles. "I'm not sure, but you should totally ask the guidance counselor when you go back to school so you can sign up for it. Do you like to write?"
Jordan clears her throat. "Yeah, sometimes. I keep journals and write stories in them sometimes. Nothing special. Just a hobby."
"That hobby could turn into a lot more, you know." Layla turns to me and her eyes turn serious. "Make sure you help her find a class, okay?"
I nod my head. "Yeah, of course."
I think back to seeing Jordan writing in her journals, sometimes asking me the weirdest questions about random things that had nothing to do with anything. Were they for her fictional characters? How long had she been writing?
Jordan stands up from the bed and adjusts her uniform skirt. "Well, I'm gonna go find a vending machine to empty. I'm sure you're tired of getting your ear talked off anyway. I don't have many girlfriends." Jordan shrugs her shoulders with the usual blank look on her face. It grows softer for only a second as she says, "Thanks, Layla. I really hope you feel better soon."
Layla reaches for her hand and gives it a squeeze. "You can come talk to me anytime."
Before Jordan leaves the room, I stand up and dig a five-dollar bill out of my pocket to give her. She undoubtedly has her own money on her, but she takes mine gladly.
Once she's gone, I sit back down and pull the chair closer to Layla's bed.
"How are you really feeling?" I ask her, raising an eyebrow. She slowly allows her head to fall back against the pillow, her eyes gently closing. Her eyelashes remind me of a butterfly's soft wing.
"Not too good. I'm happy though. I'm good." She pulls her head back up and wipes at her eye quickly.
I reach for her hand and grab it, lacing our fingers together. "You don't have to be strong Layla. You know who's in control, who is carrying you right through this."
She looks over at me, her eyes watery. "I really, really like you."
It feels like every tiny noise is amplified all of a sudden by our silence. Layla's eyes search mine almost frantically before she lowers them to our hands, her thumb rubbing circles on the back of my hand.
"It's okay if you don't like me back. I just need you to know that."
Before she can go on, I take my hand away from hers and use it to lean above her, my face inches from hers.
"I would be insane not to like you," I say quietly. I press my lips to hers, hoping to savor this moment forever. In a world where I thought pure happiness was a fairytale and love was the villain, I never imagined for a twist like this one. Spoiler alert; turns out love is actually the superhero. Love saved us all when Jesus died for us, and love keeps us going. Anyone who chooses to ignore it is missing the adventure of a lifetime, and then some.
"I like you so much, Layla," I tell her between kisses. "You have no idea." I grab either side of her face carefully and kiss her for much longer than needed, but very much wanted. It's only when we're out of breath that Layla pulls away from me.
"I think that just you being here is enough to jumpstart my heart," Layla says. I smile at that, though I want to laugh but can't.
"I've only known you for a short amount of time, but you've completely changed my world, Layla." I look away from her, growing embarrassed. "That sounds so gross but it's true."
Layla delicately places her hand on my cheek and turns my face to her. "It's not gross. Expressing your love and appreciation for people is what we should want other people to hear." She places a kiss on my nose. Her face goes from serious to silly in a split second. "Always tell me the cheesy things. I don't care which movie you quote them from, as long as it's the cheesiest line. Those are the only ones I'll accept."
A grin that could cause permanent wrinkles takes over my face. "You're killin' me, Smalls."
Layla bursts out laughing at that, her cheeks flaming red in the process. "That's the cheesiest one of them all." I plop down beside her on the bed, careful not to break the bed or her with my broad shoulders. She happily embraces me as I rest my head beside hers. For a second, we both are tangled in her oxygen tube and have a hay day getting out of it.
Once we settle down comfortably, I lean my head on her shoulders.
"If you're a bid, I'm a bird," I whisper in the most dramatic way possible. Layla smacks my shoulder playfully.
"You're going to use them all up before we even get out of this hospital room."
"You had me at 'hello'." I crack a grin at that one. "Actually, you had me at flash photography that almost blinded me."
Layla giggles. "What can I say? I only take pictures of beautiful things."
I lean up and raise an eyebrow at her. "Layla, you take pictures of literally everything."
She cracks a grin. "I guess that doesn't say much for you, does it?"
My mouth falls open. "Are you sure that's oxygen you're breathing in?"
She covers her mouth as another laugh bubbles to the surface. "I think I'm slap happy. Sorry."
I shake my head and put my arm around her, pulling her towards me. She rests her head on my chest and I can instantly feel myself calm. "I was about to say you should get some sleep, but I kind of like you like this."
She smacks my chest. "Shut up."
"What are you going to dream about in your sleep, miss feisty pants?" I say with a crooked grin.
Layla shrugs her shoulders lazily, snuggling deeper into my side. "You tell me, and I'll dream it."
I mindlessly rub her sweater-clad arm. "I don't like being the conductor."
"Be the taxi driver, then. Short distance, and not much talking."
I take a deep breath and stare up at the plain, white ceiling. "All right. Where to miss?"
It's another movie quote that I'm sure she won't get, but to my surprise, she quietly whispers,
"Oh, I know this one. To the stars, please."
________________________
The song chosen for this chapter is Fall by Ed Sheeran! Such a perfectly slow and delicate song for that ending scene. Which, by the way, is probably one of my favorite scenes with Layla and Jonah!
Let me know what you think!!