Hey yo!!!!!!
so please don't kill me but I tried not to end the chapter with a cliffy but it still happened! :( its the last cliffy :)
lol but look at the bright side, I'm updating chapter 38 today as well. So there won't be much wait for the next chapter.
The story is almost over and I've been updating like crazy this week. It will be finished by Friday.
THE SEQUEL BEGINS AFTER :)
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Bryce's P.O.V.
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Edward was taken to the prison infirmary since my mother knocked him into unconsciousness with the chair.
She was restrained until she calmed down, then ultimately banned from visiting again.
I had already texted the driver to take the kids and Quinn back to the hotel after McDonald's instead of returning here.
As we were escorted out, I had Ethan and Evan take mom back to the hotel as well, so that I could have some privacy to talk to Raelynn.
I opened the truck door for her and then slid in next to her.
I looked in the rearview mirror and made eye contact with the driver.
"Gruneburgpark" I told him. I would tell him to just drive until I say stop but it's nice out, it would be nice to just have some fresh air after everything that was just said. And since that is the only park I noticed on several occasions when visiting my lawyer and always enjoyed its beauty, I think it would be nice to go for a walk.
The driver nod and took off in that direction.
"Bryce where are the kids? Did you let Quinn know we were leaving not to return here?" Rae asked.
"Yes, I texted her and the driver while we were still inside. They are fine, I promise. You know I would never let anything happen to them. You and our kids are my world." I told her.
She looked at me unsure.
"I promise!"
"Ok!" She sat back in her seat.
I took her hand in mine, entwine our fingers, laid my head back on the head rest and close my eyes.
I'm so tired.
It wasn't even a minute later and I felt Rae respond to my action by tightening her fingers around mine.
I smiled.
I thought they would have all hated me by now for ruining the memories of the happy life they thought they had. For pulling the rug from under their feet and the blinds from over their eyes.
It's easy to believe that the secrets I kept weren't major ones. But they are, at least to my family and I.
It's like me starving for a week and a starving child from Africa tells me I know nothing of struggles because he has been starving for years. That actually wouldn't be true.
His struggle may have been way more drastic and severe but it doesn't make his anymore valid than mine. Mine was thrown at me out of nowhere, it wasn't something I had ever dealt with or was used it. It was drastic enough for me and I dealt with it in the best possible way I thought how to.
Similar to two people who stole something. Say for instance, one stole his fathers wallet while the other went to great lenghts and stole a car. One was more drastic than the other, but since his was more drastic, does the other stealing a wallet not count as stealing anymore? A man murdered one person and another man murdered ten. Can the man who murdered one be discredited as knowing nothing about murdering someone? No I believe that stealing is stealing, a sin is a sin, and struggles are struggles. People need not to judge and speak on things they have never been through because looking in from the outside, one will never understand.
It may not have been the right way to handle it. Had I spoken up then maybe my mother could have helped me, we could have ran away or something. But fear, once it resides in you, it's hard to get rid of.
I feared my father getting even angrier at me for telling and killing me. Who would protect my mother then? I feared telling my brother's because what if they confronted him and he harmed them as well? I didn't see the point in everyone suffering. I wanted to tell my mother but what if she confronted him and all that I was trying to protect her from happened? What if he became so angry and killed her, what then? What good could that have possibly done? What if we had ran away? He was one of the richest man in the country, it would be so easy to find us! What then, he kills us for leaving him or even worst. He could have had the entire police department at his fingertips with just one check. My father knew how to make problems disappear. He was a ruthless business man before all his shenanigans. But worst of all, what if my mother didn't believe me and chose him over him? That would have broken me more than any beating.
So it wasn't that I was really trying to play hero. My thirteen year old mind was just trying to think of the most logical thing to do. By the time we moved away to South Carolina during their first separation, it was already embedded in my mind that I did the right thing since everyone was happy and ok. After that, I just didn't see the need to bring it back up, I wasn't around him anymore, he had stop drinking and had started to go on long business trips and would be back a day or two before he left again, so he became too busy to have time for us when we would visit and Ethan and Evan were home.
I opened my eyes and look at Rae who seemed to be shuffling around.
She was now sitting with her back to the door facing me.
I leaned forward, bringing my face close to hers. I could now feel her breath on my face as her breathing became more labored. She licked her lips and parted them slightly. I press further into her, her eyes fluttered close. I reach behind her and push the safety lock down on the door before moving back to my seat.
Her eyes open upon realizing my intention and she seemed somewhat upset.
I really wanted to kiss, like so damn bad but I also wanted to respect her boundaries and know where we stand before I upset her.
"So I don't know how to ask this but I need to know for sure. So I know you claimed to have adopted Shantel, but you two were here in alone for three weeks, are you telling me nothing happened? You've never slept with her? Or that nothing has ever happened between the both of you before?" She ask looking me in the eye.
"Well we have slept together twice while we've been here and a couple times in the past." I grab her face with both palms resting on her cheeks before she can turn away. "It's not how your thinking, so before you get mad, let me explain. We've slept together in a platonic way. It has always started with her waking up and screaming her head off in her sleep and crying. I would wake her up to stop her nightmares, she would beg me not to leave and I would lay with her to calm her so she could sleep. The last time we slept together was the night before the accident. She had a nightmare and was scared to go back to sleep, she climbed into my bed and I held her as she laid her head in my shoulder. I have never been attractive to her and I don't see her that way. It's mutual. She looks up to me as though I am her father, except for that one brief time she was on drugs, but that's a whole other story for another day, but she has no family and I'm the closest thing to a real father that she has ever had. I know I'm only five years older than her but she's really like an older daughter/ little sister to me. It has never been anything more and never will be." I explain to her.
"Mmhh I guess that makes sense considering what she has been through." She said dryly.
"You don't believe me?" I asked.
" No, I do. It's trust, that I just don't trust you." She made clear. "I can't even begin to understand everything that you went through or even think of what I would have done had it been me. I understand why you kept it a secret, to protect the ones you love. I know Bryce, trust me I do. I did the same with you and the triplets, I kept them a secret from you and you a secret from them. Lies were told and in my mind, like yours, they were all done with the intention of doing good no matter what outcome they may have ended up having. So I understand why you did it. But the fact still remains that you continually lied to my face over and over. You looked me in the eyes a lied like it was nothing. I find people like that to be scary, who knows what you may lie about in the future, what they are capable of. I don't need you to lie to me to protect me, tell me the truth and weather the storm with me if you really want to protect me."
I process all that she just said.
I never really realized how much I would destroy everyones's trust by finally telling the truth. The truth is suppose to be such a good thing but has so many down sides; it hurts. If you turn "truth" backward "H T U R T" and take out the first "T" it spells hurt.
We arrive at the park and we get out of the truck.
"I just thought we could take a stroll through the park and talk before we head back. I should have asked you but I hope you don't mind. I just miss you and wanted you to myself for a little while before I give the kids all my attention." I told her.
"It's fine. I've actually been cooped up in the room for the last two days. This is just what I need and besides, it's beautiful here."
" Yeah it is." I agree.
I take her hand in mine and wait for her reaction. She doesn't pull away, so I figure it's ok.
We walk in silence just taking in the blooming flowers and scenery.
"Do you think I'm a terrible person for lying even though you know why I did it?" I express my thought out loud.
"I'm pregnant!" She stops and blurt out.
No way?
She pregnant!
Were having another child?
I smile brightly before picking her up and spinning her around. I then crush her to me and plaster my lips to hers.
My dream is going to come through. I'm going to get a football team.
I put her back on her feet and beam down on her.
"You've just made me the happiest man in the world for the fourth time. I love you so much baby!" I'm so happy.
"It's not yours Bryce." She then says.
What?
I looked at her in shock.
The smile falls from my face.
It has to be mine.
Someone please take my heart out of my chest. It's beating so fast and hard. The pain. It hurt's.
I step back from her.
"Rae what do you mean its not mine?" I whispered.
"I lied, you are the father." She said.
I let a breath of air out. "Why would you play around like that. That wasn't funny, that was a horrible joke, it really hurt me." I told her.
"That was the point Bryce. You asked a question and I simply showed you the answer. It hurted you when I said it wasn't yours right?" She said and I nod. "And when I said that I lied and it was, you became mad at me for lying to you but then happy again since you knew the truth, correct?" I nod again seeing where shes going with this even though it was a terrible example.
"That is how people feel when you lie to them Bryce. The truth might piss them off but ultimately it will be in the past and they can move forward and be happy. Lies hurt more that the truth Bryce, because they are forever, even after you tell the truth, the lie last because trust is broken and people never forget. Ok? Or was a bad example?"
"No I understand completely."
"Good! Now let's go get me some ice cream, croissant and pickles." She smiled and point to a cafe across the street from where we were standing.
We started to walk towards it but then I grabbed her arm to stop her.
I thought she said it was only an example. But who orders food like that? A pregnant woman!
"Wait! Are you really pregnant?"
"Yup!" She said popping the P. "And this little monkey really wants Ice Cream!" She rubbed her tummy.
A smile is now plastered back on my face as we walk into the cafe. We find a seat in the corner and I order a cup of coffee while she order a ton of stuff that combined together would give a grown man diarrhea.
As soon as were are served, she digs into her Ice cream and moans as she takes the first mouthful.
I just laugh. Is this how pregnant women are with moods and cravings? Well then, I can't wait to experience it all.
We sit and I drink my coffee while she eats and talks about the kids.
"How far along are you?" I asked. I never got to experience it all with the triplets but this will be different. I will be there for her every second of everyday.
"Almost 9 weeks. I found out I was 7 weeks and six days pregnant the day after your -" she stopped.
"After my what?" I push her to go on.
"I found out the day after the accident. I was stressed with hardly hearing from you, then strung out with worry when I heard of the accident, then seeing you in the state you were in and hearing Shantel was your wife kind of was the last straw for me I think. I started bleeding in your hospital room. I almost lost the baby, one because it's already in a life threatening position laying on my cervix and two, all the stress." She said hesitantly.
"Fuck!" I hissed. I'm mad at myself. "Rae I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I'm so damn sorry."
I get up from my chair, turn her chair towards me and kneeled in front of her. "Rae please forgive me. Please, I didn't intend to hurt you and our baby. I'm so sorry babe, so so sorry." I drop my head in her lap feeling too useless to even look at her.
I caused harm to my wife and child. We'll future wife. Well I don't even know if that's possible after what she went through because of me. I ignore my pride and ego, and silently wept for almost killing my child and causing Rae emotional and mental damage.
"Bryce are you crying?" I feel her hand caressing my scalp.
"No just allergies." I fake coughed.
Maybe I should have thought about this before. Now I'm embarrassed, people are staring at me. But who cares, Raelynn is my focus.
I kiss her stomach.
She stood up and pulled me with her.
I wiped any remaining tear away from my face.
Then she hugged me. She buried her face in my chest and hugged me.
It felt good and I hugged her back.
"Is that why you've been sick? The baby?" I asked.
I felt her head shake up and down on my chest.
"Yeah, I couldn't keep anything down and felt awful but so far today, I'm not sure why, but I feel much better!" She looks at the table and motion to it with her arm. "This has been my first real meal since then and I don't feel nauseous."
Maybe because now Daddy is home.
But I wouldn't say that out loud.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there to look after you. I know I keep saying sorry but I'm sorry for it all. I hope that one day I can earn your trust back."
"Bryce don't be ridiculous, how could you have been there for me when you were in a coma, and then after waking up, having your brain monitored. You couldn't leave the hospital, I don't blame you for that. Just be the one to tell the truth starting today, instead of having it come out from others, it tends to be worst that way."
"Ok I promise. Let's go, I think I need to go and finish the story as much as it's taking a toll on me. There is still more left to be told." I told her, dropping enough cash on the table to cover the bill and tip.
I put my arm around her shoulder and we walk back to the truck.
We get in and head back to the hotel.
As we pull up outside, I move to open the door but she stopped me.
"Think carefully about your answer to this question. This could make or break whatever we have left between us." The smiling Raelynn was now gone as she took on a more serious tone. "Did you get me pregnant on purpose?"
Oh shit.
I look out through the window rubbing the back of my neck.
Yeah, the first time we made love in the shower.
The first time really was on purpose, I went into the bathroom to pee and saw her silhouette through the glass door. She had her back turned, and her head held back as the water cascaded down her body.
I tried to restrain myself as I just stood there watching her. It's fair to say my restraint gave out.
I peeled my clothes off, took a condom out my wallet and hopped in the shower with her. She was surprised but didn't resist me. The look in her eyes said she wanted me as much as I wanted her. In her eyes wasn't lust that I'd seen reflected in others that I have bedded in the past couple years, it was love.
In that moment, I didn't see Raelynn anymore, I saw my wife, I saw the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I wanted to see her pregnant with my child. I wanted it all. I dropped the open condom and the packet on the shower floor and just inserted myself into her, with no barriers. I just didn't see the point of a condom. With our flesh merged against each other, I made us one.
After that I felt somewhat guilty, guilty for not considering her wishes or respecting that she might not be ready for more kids.
But the thought of her giving me more kids and me being able to experience it all eased my guilt.
The second time we were both caught up and it just happened. I didn't use a condom and I came in her, but it wasn't intentional.
But judging by how far along she is, it's obvious that all it took was just one time.
"Yes!" I respond. I deserve anything she says or does right now.
She opened the door and got out.
"Come on, I'm sure the kids have a lot of things they would like to tell you." She stretched her hand out to me.
This must be pregnancy hormones. Is she mad or not?
What if she tries to like slam my head in the door. I mean you never know with women and these mind games they play.
"You're not mad?" I asked before accepting her hand.
"Oh I'm quite furious. But what's done is done. As much as I would have liked to be married before I had another child out of wedlock and excelled further in my career, I don't regret this peanut in my stomach. I already love her. But like I said before, the trust I had for you is ruined."
I accepted her hand skeptically and got out the truck since she was smiling.
"Her? Were having another girl?" Well that's exciting.
"I don't know yet, it's still too early to tell, it just feels offensive to refer to our baby as ' it'. I hope it's a girl though. I love Rush and Ry, but boys have a lot more energy and gives too more trouble."
As the elevator dinged open I just smiled.
She said "our"!
She said " our baby girl."
Maybe I'm reading too much into it but I can't help but to be hopefully that we will be a family again.
Only this time I want it to be as husband and wife and as my mother puts it "with a village full of kids."
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Elena P.O.V
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The top of the chair I threw knocked him out of his chair as it fell into the wall.
He laid there on the ground not moving.
I hope he's dead.
Maybe I should have thrown my phone into his other eye. If I can't kill him, I can at least blind him!
Before I could even reach for the phone, two guards were restraining my arms while Bryce spoke with them trying to rectify the situation.
I should cut his hands off too. Then not only will I have stopped him from using his sinful eyes to look at little girls, but then he would have nothing to touch them with. Well not if you count his feet, mmhh, I can get rid of those too.
I replay the whole scenario in my head.
I'm very hurt and I can't control my reactions because never before had I ever expected anything like this.
My husband left me for prostitutes and now to add insult to the wound, he loves little girl.
He's probably one of those old perverts driving around offering little girls candy.
"The kids are down for their nap except Rush, he's up watching TV, but I'm sure he'll fall asleep soon." Quinn said stepping out onto the balcony with me and the boys.
"Thanks babe. I don't know what I'd ever do without you." Ethan said and kissed her on the lips.
"No need to thank me. They are my god kids too."
"And your an amazing god mother, I'm sure you'll make an even better mother!" Ethan smiled.
Quinn went stiff. Oh oh! Somebody has baby issues and it's not me. My eggs dried up a long time ago, no amount of fertilizer could make garden grow. "So what happened at the prison?" She changed the topic.
Ethan seemed to be oblivious as he was still smiling at the thought of her having his babies.
I won't even get involved, that's none of my business. My business is already out of control, no time to be minding other people's.
Ethan and Evan told her the story starting from the beginning since we entered the prison.
Once he was finished Quinn stood up angrily.
"What?" she shrieked. "You mean she's not Bryce wife? You mean to tell me that Tomar is not his child? Are you seriously telling me that Shantel is his adopted daughter and was raped by his father?" She exclaimed, not being able to believe it all like we did upon first hearing the declarations.
"Yup!" Evan answered.
"He raped her! Omg! Tomar is a product of rape!" She looked at Evan and Ethan. "She's your sister and great niece since Shantel is your niece!" She then looked at me. Tomar is your step daughter and great granddaughter, seeing that Shantel is your granddaughter, that would make Tomar Bryce's sister and granddaughter as well. Worst of all, she's your own father, and Elena, your husband's rape victim? Nothing will ever be the same again. What's to happen to Tomar? How do we look at her everyday and not thinking about all the bad and madness that brought her here?" She asked. She feel back into her chair at the obscureness.
Well when she puts it like that. We do see like a very messed up bunch. Very very messed up family.
I didn't even think about how this would look. Imagine what the public would think. My word! But if there is one thing I know, I will not allow another child to suffer because of that one eyed monkey I married.
"We don't!" I made clear. "We look at her and remember all the good that came from the bad. She is the rainbow after the storm."
I feel terrible. Terribly broken. I have no idea how Bryce kept all of these secrets pent up inside. His insides must be scratched, battered and bruised just trying to hold them in. I don't have to keep it pent up, I voiced it, yet it still feels like I'm being gutted from the inside.
I know I asked for the truth but now I realize I can't handle it.
"Mom why are you crying?" I look up at the sound of his voice as he walks onto the patio towards me with Raelynn's hand in his. My baby! He suffered so much trying to protect us all. I'm surprised he's not beyond messed up mentally.
"I don't know what to do! My heart can't take it. This is just too much. I just don't know what to do!" I cried.
"Mom what do you mean?" He asked.
"I tried to kill her Bryce! Several times, I tried to kill her. Yet she was the victim, she was already suffering and I wanted to kill her." I officially feel like the worst person alive.
I judged someone unfairly. I judged her based off my assumption. She was never given the chance to defend herself and I judged her harshly. I clearly forgot my logic with her that, I would always consider someone innocent until proven guilty. So why consider her innocent? Well, after I witnessed the hurt in Raelynn and her almost losing my grandchild, all logical thinking went out the window.
I am beyond ashamed of myself.
"He raped her Bryce! A child, and he raped her." I whispered brokenly, but loud enough for him to hear.
He sighs and pull a chair out for Raelynn, before occupying the one next to her.
"Mom you never let me finish at the prison, we got thrown out and then I needed to talk to Rae. I just figured I would continue once I got back. But I never got to finish after Evan did his 1 plus 1 calculation and came up with 25." He said rubbing his temple.
"What are you saying then? There is more? What more could there possibly be beyond rape?" I yelled standing up.
"He never raped her mother! Evan assumed wrong." He said quieting me.
"Oh!" I sat back down. My legs feeling jelly like.
Now I'm starting to think whatever Edward did was a lot worse than rape.
I shiver under the heat of the sun as chills ran through my body.
Should I stay or should I leave?
Stay?
Or leave?
Stay ?
Or leave?
To hell with it, I'm staying. The debate in my mind concluded.
If Bryce, as a lone man, had to cart these secret around by himself and keep them, then I as a woman with support should be strong enough to hear them and cope with them.
I sit up straight giving Bryce the signal to continue as we all sat waiting.
"Ok, and this time don't interrupt me so that I can finish." We all nod.
"This all started long before I knew about it, but the day it all came tumbling down and the day I got involved was on October 26, 2011, the day Tomar was born, what should have been a happy occasion, was by far, the worst day of my life, the day that still makes me wake up in cold sweat, the day that still makes Shantel scared to sleep at nights or her screaming bloody murder in her sleep. It's the day that I spent a chunk of my inheritance from granddad paying of people in attempt to erase. It's the day I wanted to never repeat again, but now it seems I have no choice." He took a deep breath.
The pep that I just gave myself is no longer working. I lied. I can't do this.
I got up to make a run for the hills.
~~~Author's Note~~~
LOL AT RAELYNN'S EXAMPLE!
I LOVE ELENA'S CRAZINESS!!
CAN RAELYNN AND BRYCE WORK IT OUT???
EVAN CANT CALCULATE??? LOL
SHANTEL WASNT RAPED??!?!?!?!?!?
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!!