Emma's POV
He is so hot, I thought to myself as I scrolled through his Instagram. Wishing I could be the girl in his arms in his photo, blonde hair, gleaming eyes, and perfect tan. I wish.
I wish I was as cute as all those girls in those pictures on his Instagram. I'm just unlucky. I feel as if I'm prone to be in bad relationships. All the guys I ever have been with have been either, ran off by my older brother, controlling, or some type of freak wanting only one thing: sex.
This is what makes me feel ugly. Unworthy. I despise my self for being prone to bullshit for people wishing to be ME. Why can't I love myself as much as the way people love ME. Why can't I have a smooth relationship. One without them leaving ME.
Maybe I'm over thinking. Maybe I'm confused.
My phones vibrates taking me out of my thoughts.
Erica:Hey wanna come over. Justin having a party tonight? Might be lit!!
I could go to a party to get out of my thoughts. I mean who knows...
Me: Idk. I'm not feeling it.
But I really wasn't in the mood for a party. In my gut I knew Erica wasn't gonna let off this easy. One way or another she's gonna get me to that party. So I decided to be the bigger person in this case, which is very unfortunate for me.
Me: Ok. Lemme get ready.
Erica: Good. See you soon.😘
I couldn't help but smile. Erica always knew how to make me feel better. She knew I came out of a bad relationship. And here she tries to make me feel better. I truly love her.
I pulled my auburn hair from the messy bun I had it in.
"Curl or no curl," I said to myself. As I decided to curl the ends of my hair. I threw on some mascara to eliminate my blew eyes and freckles. But I didn't know what to wear. I ran to my closet.
"Too slutty, too preppy, too casual, ah, just perfect," I said as I grabbed my black mini skirt and white neck wrap shirt. It was just perfect for a party.
I ran down the stairs, to find a group of men talking to my brother, Noah.
"Hey, I'm headed out with Erica," I said as I walked down the stairs aiming for the door.
"Be back by 10."
I turned around as I take in what he just said, "Noah, I'm not fucking ten, I'll be back whenever."
"Then don't go out at all."
"What the actual fuck," I scoffed. "I'm 17 I can go out whenever I want and come back whenever. So back the fuck off, douche."
As I begin to opened the door. He grabbed my arm. Tightly. "What the fuck did I just say, 10 o'clock and no later than that!"
I yanked my arm back, knowing I wasn't going to be back by 10. It's 6:01. I'm definitely not going to be back. And I'm gonna do it on purpose, just to piss him off.
***
The music here was loud. You could here it from outside. I walk up to Jacob's house. The feeling of regret easing and creeping to my body.
All parties I regret.
A/N
I will be updating consecutively. This book is sorta-kinda based on expression. Some scenes are dramatized for the better effect of the audience. Some parts is how I truly feel, and some is fictional. What do you think will happen at the party? Will it bad, good, or is it just fear.
Love you guys😍 if you please feel free to comment your prediction. I will upload the next part 2morrow.