Elvia awoke me the next morning and looked at me with pity. "How are you my lady?" She looked at my bare body and at the sheets looking for smudges of blood. My wounds bled some during the night, staining the sheets. She blanched when she saw the smudges, shaking her head sadly.
"The wounds are yet smarting but otherwise I am good Elvia." She rolled her eyes like I was being deliberately naive.
"Are you not sore, my lady?" She asked looking at my naked back grumpily, paying attention to her office. She washed my back slowly with wet rags.
"Sore? What for, Elvia? The Viking did not touch me." I was not yet completely awake and my mind was a foggy land. There was something in her voice.
"The Norse slept in your bedchamber lady." She reminded me sharply. I looked at her in surprise and annoyance. I woke up at last.
"I am yet untouched, if that's what you mean, crone. He does not force himself on wounded women." I replied, a tad annoyed the old woman would disbelieve me and still think Yngvarr Bodmordrson used me wounded. She blinked, clearly surprised, and I surprised myself in this vehement denial of a character of a man I had just met. Maybe it was because he was the first who showed me some kindness, though kindness was too strong a word.
"Forgive me, my lady. I could not help but remember your dear mother, God assoil her good soul. I was fearing the Norse would be no better than our Lord. It gladdens my heart it is not so." She told me kindly with naked relief showing in her face. The thought I would never see her again brought me to tears.
"My dear Elvia, I wish I could take you with me. Your company is so precious to my heart." I told her gently.
"Why do you not take Mary, my lady?" She referred the girl who used to be lady's maid before I was sold.
"I am to be a slave, I cannot have servants to pamper me, sweet Elvia. Treat me and leave me be for a while, I need to think." She did as she was bid, spreading a healing salve in my wounds and dressing them now they had had time to breathe. She left a short while later, giving me orders not to move or the scabs would break and bleed again.
I stayed in bed, not changing positions and thinking. I was not unhappy with the prospect of leaving this house. It had never been my home. My sire was a controlling man, and I lost count of how many undeserved beatings he had given me, though this was the first time that left marks. He delighted in making women suffer, especially his own wives and daughters. I had more than half a dozen half siblings born from freedwomen and slaves. He loved watching them scrub the halls and even encouraged his soldiers to use them as reward. They were not acknowledged though everybody knew who sired them, and had to work even more than the others. Albert himself was my half uncle, son of my grandfather and a servant woman. He had not been acknowledged either. However, I would miss Aiken and Aldar, my brothers who were like sons to me. They were growing so fast and every day found a different way to amuse me and making me laugh... I closed my eyes, remembering their pretty faces.
"Ait, ait want play.... puese ait." They were two years old and could not say Ailith.
"What do you want to play, my darling?" I asked Aiken.
"Chase. Want chase... Avar tuo." Aiken was more bold than his brother, and Alvar let him talk for both of them, preferring to watch and observe. Aiken was also growing faster than Alvar and it was clear to see he would be a mighty warrior when he grew up. No matter what my father declared, I was sure that from all his sons, Alvar was the one with the true devotion to church.
"Oh? Alvar wants too?" I asked in mock danger. I walked very slowly towards Alvar, and before he knew it was tickling him, his toddler giggles making my heart sing. I felt a small tug on my sleeve and looked down to see Aiken looking at me with puppy eyes. I raised him to my lap and tickled both of them until they had tears seeping from their eyes, from laughter. They got up talking their secret language and tried to hide behind a curtain so I would chase them.
"Got you." They laughed and I laughed with them. My babies...
They were almost 6 now and I despaired to think of what I would tell them to explain my absence. No, my father really was a ruthless and greedy man. At that moment, I heard the door opening and assuming to be Elvia, for she had a penchant to hover, I snapped.
"Please, Elvia, I asked you not to disturb me. I want to think, to find a way to explain Aiken I'm leaving." The open door created a draft and I shuddered.
"I'm sorry to disturb you, min smukke pige." The voice, more than the words, let me know exactly who had entered my bedchamber.
"I am sorry my lord. I thought it was Elvia. She has a penchant to hover over her charges." I told him without moving.
"You are forgiven. Your name, Ailith... it means warrioress. It suits you lady. Many a grown man would not receive such punishment and stay silent. You won my men's unwilling respect lady." He said the last grudgingly, like he did not want me to win respect from any man except him.
"Thank you my lord. Would you mind covering me? I find myself very cold." And scared of having him look at my nakedness. What if it stirred his manly desires?
"Will the blanket not harm your back and rump?" He enquired.
"I will keep my foot up." I answered back. He covered me and I sighed, feeling better immediately.
"After this day and especially after you enter my ship, I will not speak your saxon tongue between us. I will speak my language and until you learn it, I will not understand you or acknowledge you in anyway."
"How will I learn if you do not teach me?" I wondered.
"It is not my concern. You are my slave and you will speak my tongue." I wondered if he was being deliberately cruel. His next words confirmed it.
"I am giving you away as a gift to my brother, Throst." He said it with relish as if he could not wait to get rid of me as soon as possible. "You will be a good slave to him or it will bring me dishonor and I will find a way of punishing you."
He left then, and I wondered why he had sought me, if only to taunt me. I wondered how would my life be.
I was not afraid, for indeed, why would fear help me? I had been sold. I was confined in my bed and could not escape. Even if I could, the keep was surrounded by vikings, and I had no place to go. The servants could not help me and it would be unfair to ask. No, my fate no longer resided in this land. It belonged in the Northern Lands, and there was no escaping it. I sighed deeply. I had not expected favour from my father and indeed I had gotten none. I suppose it might be for the better I was not to be given to an old fool who would force me and beget heirs as soon as possible. By my father's orders I had always worked in this house, slavery would be nothing new to me. I was nervous though, about coupling. I had seen the animals mate, but my mother's memories filled me with, well, not fear, but I wasn't looking forward to it. Elvia's look had but simply expanded my reluctance in bedsport. My mind wondered, but my feelings were the same, and I wished we would leave soon, before the dark future could frighten me for real.
Mary, my maidservant gave me news every time she came to my chamber. A month passed slowly. I healed, but Yngvarr confined me to my chamber in case I would try to escape.
The Lords were agreed, the papers were drawn and signed. The viking's Knarr, seven of them, were being filled with livestock, and slaves baron Ainsley had prepared before the Viking came. Lord Yngvarr personally supervised every single item that entered his ships and any merchandise deemed sub par was sent back to my father who then had to find a suitable replacement. She told me the viking men, with my father's permission, had started availing themselves of the female servants, and several of them were with child already. My father crowed in delight for if the norse had sons and daughters among his women, they would not kill their own kin if he ever betrayed them.
"M...my lady." Mary came to my chamber about two months after my sale, crying and pale.
"What is it Mary?"
"I got orders not to tell you, but I fear I must. This last month, Yngvarr Bodmordrson has availed himself of me to release his lust my lady. I... I could not tell you, lady for my shame is great. I would not have insulted you by saying the man who is using your body would be using that of a servant at the same time as well, but lady... I'm with child. I do not know what to do." I was shocked. Was this how he had endured to sleep in my chamber, in my bed and not take me? I felt guilty.
"Don't fret Mary. This night I will fight for you." She paled and I saw the fear in her eyes. I shook my head, not changing my mind and sent her out. The food she had brought, brown bread, braised rabbit leg, bowls of peas, and boiled trout stuffed with spices, was good and I was famished enough to devour everything despite the mounting nerves. I washed my hands and face in moonflower scented water, the essence was a gift from Lord Yngvarr.
That night, when he came to my bed, I dared to speak with him. "My lord, we must talk."
"Why, min smukke pige?" I was surprised he accepted my Saxon language. I was very slowly starting to understand his Norse tongue, for after a week of no communication he angrily started teaching me his language.
"I heard today you have been using my maidservant, Mary." His face turned scarily angry.
"Who told you?" He thundered.
"It does not matter, she is carrying your child, and you owe her better than to have your son or daughter in a household where she is abused by her master. Not even god can protect your offspring from my lord father. He would beat her, and possibly abuse your child as well." I shouted back. I stood naked before him, for in my anger I had left the bed and he did not allow me clothes in the night. I controlled the urge to hide my body with my hands. He had seen me naked before, and I had decided not to care. I would keep my pride, my dignity, but my body now belonged to him for I was his slave.
He got up and, grabbing my arm so hard it would bruise, threw me on the bed. He climbed on top of me, his legs each on either side of my waist, and his free hand went to my throat.
"Do not raise your voice at me, slave, or I will be forced to punish you." I could no longer breath, and he kept tightening his hand on my neck so hard it crushed my voice. My eyes closed against his cruelty and then I started seeing stars. I felt myself fading and he smiled cruelly. At the last second before I lost consciousness, he released my throat. Involuntarily, my body arched with my breath. But he then tightened his hand again, repeating the cycle two times before letting me go. I scrambled away from him, and his hands started hovering about my face.
"Forgive me, please forgive me, my lady, I lost my temper. Are you well? Can you speak?" He asked me in a very close succession. I tried to talk. To say I hated him, but no sound came from my damaged throat, the effort draining me from the precious last energy I had. I sank underneath, with the last image in my eyes from this man, his hands on my face, urging me to stay awake.