I don't know my future. Hell, I don't even know what I'll be doing next week, let alone next year. So I can't make any promises but I do know one thing: no matter where I am, what I feel or who I become, it will always begin and end with you.
r.m. drake
BEA
My lips slowly formed into a smile as I behold myself in the mirror. Tidy sweeping low bun for my hair, a light coverage foundation to match my fair skin tone, shades of brown layering on my lids, a touch of pink blush on my cheeks and lips with nude matte finish.
I carefully stood up from the vanity chair and fixed the robe that I was wearing. I walked off slowly near the glass wall of my hotel room where lay figure was placed. I let out a sigh of bliss as I ran my fingertips through the details of the stunning long dress made from chiffon fabric. It was aesthetically designed with V-neck and cap-sleeves appliques, empire waist embellished with rhinestones and an alluring keyhole back. For a moment, I admire the elegant vintage white dress.
I came back to my senses when I heard sharp knocks and slowly glanced to that direction. The door was ajar and saw two lovely ladies on cream silk frock nudging each other. I shook my head while watching the familiar scenario.
"You first." The first woman said.
"Ay naku. Ikaw na kasi." The other one answered.
I chuckled at the sight of these two.
"Det!"
"Lovel!"
They both on crossed arms posture. Arg ang cute.
"Mom. Mama. Enough na. Para kayong ewan jan." I reached for Mom's left hand while right hand naman kay Mama Lovel and dragged both of them inside. "Please come in na. Remember, bawal sa door, may buntis."
"Hala ka Det. Oo nga." Worry evident on Mama's voice.
"Baka mahirapan manganak si Bea." Mom hurled back.
I sat at the edge of the bed while laughing. "I was just joking lang po. Bakit kasi nagtuturuan pa kayong dalawa kanina? You don't want to assist me po ba?" I pouted.
"Oh sorry my princess. It's not like that." Mom said, she sat beside me.
"Pagpacensyahan mo na kami Bea, anak." Mama Lovel started, she hauled a stool and took a sit facing me and Mommy. "Parang kailan lang kasi, baby ka pa namin." She paused for a second as her eyes become watery. "Nagtatalo pa kami ni Det kung anong head dress mo for your baptism day."
Mom chuckled. "That was so funny, Lovel." Natawa sila pareho. "Because we bought the same design of headband."
"What?" Nakisali na din ako sa tawanan. "Well, you two have the same taste naman kasi."
"So this time, we made sure na hindi na pareho ang binili namin for your big day." Mama Lovel handed me a small rectangular gift box.
"Ano po ito?" I smiled and stared at her sparkling eyes.
"Just open it, anak."
With too much excitement, I immediately pulled the ribbon and open the present. My mouth instantly formed an O as I fiddled with the glistering hair accessory - a silver plated hair clip with crystal accents in a leaf and vine design. "Mama, ang ganda. Thank you po." I reached for her and gave my biggest hug.
"You're welcome, Bea." She kissed both of my cheeks.
"Well." Mommy cleared her throat, her lips were smiling widely. "It's my turn now." She gave me a white paper bag and I snappy open it. My eyes twinkles as the clear square box forth. "A handmade diamond tiara crown for my one and only princess."
"Mommy." The only word I uttered. She enveloped me inside her arms and planted a kiss on my forehead. "Thank you Mom. It's so beautiful and fancy."
"Of course, you deserve nothing but the best on your special day. Isang beses ka lang ikakasal, Bea." She broke our hug but held my hand and pressed it gently.
I stretched out my other hand and grasped Mama's, too. The warmth of their touch made me feel so loved. Lucky me, I was raised by two amazing women.
"Mom, Mama, maraming salamat po." I paused for a second and gave a fleeting glimpse on their faces. "I hope you both know how thankful I am to have you in my life, two mothers who love me unconditionally. You two are my rocks and I would be lost without the both of you. Thank you for everything. I love you my Mommy and Mama." I heard both of them sobbing. "I may be bride today, wife at the end of the day and a mother real soon, but please know that I will never stop being your daughter."
"You will always be our baby girl." They said in unison that made them laugh and cry at the same time.
"Don't cry na kasi, bahala kayo, puffy eyes kayo sa mga photo." I teased them.
"Stop na kasi Det." Mama Lovel said while wiping away her tears.
"Ikaw kaya naunang umiyak." Mom replied, iyak-tawa pa din.
"Manang mana talaga kami ni Jho sa inyong dalawa." Both of them giggled because of my statement. "Anyway, please help me get dress Mom and Mama."
"Our pleasure, anak."
***
I cannot explain my emotions as I observe myself infront of the reflector. Am I dreaming? Wearing this gorgeous white gown, hair clip adorned my hairdo and tiara and veil completed my bridal look.
"It looks good on you, my princess. Parang isinukat sayo ang wedding dress ko." Mommy gave me a quick hug.
"Ang ganda-ganda mo, anak." Mama clasped her hand.
"Pero bakit parang may kulang po?" Pinagmasdan ko muli ang aking sarili sa salamin.
"Yep!" A familiar voice answered. "Wear these please." She gave me a peck on my cheek.
"Oh yeah. Akala ko binawi mo na yung gift mo. Anong petsa na kasi Jho, sobrang late mo." Natawa kaming apat.
"Crazy!" Jho said. She first put on my earrings and then my necklace.
"Perfect." The old version of Bea and Jhoana commented.
"Enjoy your special day beh." She was likely to cry.
"Shhh." I wrapped my arms around Jho and squeezed her warmly. Mom and Mama joined the group hug which made my heart a little peaceful and calm.
Because honestly, the emotions that I was feeling when I woke up was surreal. Butterflies in my stomach, anxiety and disorientation, doubts and questions right up until the last moments and sadness over letting go of my single self. But despite of the intense sentiments, the joy and happiness and love subdued above all. I cannot wait to marry my Thirdy.
***
THIRDY
I was uneasy and highly strung when I arrived at Christ the King Parish. The summery weather of September caused me to stay inside my car while waiting for the much awaited event of my life. I checked myself at the rare-view mirror and fixed the strands of my hair even if it was nicely combed. "Ang gwapo mo talaga Thirdy, mas lalong maiinlove sayo nyan si Bea." I murmured to myself trying to ease the tension and boost my self-confidence. Baka magbago isip ni Bea pag hindi gwapong Thirdy ang naghihintay sakanya. Napailing at natawa na lang ako sa sarili ko ng dahil sa mga naiisip ko.
The soft rapped on the car door brought me back to reality. I immediately unlocked and opened the shotgun seat for my beauteous Mom, she was gowned in luminous cream silk. I gave her a peck on the cheek when she settled inside.
"You look as beautiful as always, Ma." A compliment that she graciously accept.
"Maliit na bagay Kuya." She laughed a little. "Anyway, kamusta naman ang bridegroom namin?"
"In all honesty Ma, halo-halo yung nararamdaman ko. Ni hindi ko maexplain yung feelings or emotions ko ngayon. Saya, kaba, takot. Ganito po ba talaga yun?" I forced myself to smile.
"Thirdy, anak. Normal lang yan. Wag mo ipahalata na kabado ka, okay? Isipin mo na lang, nadinig na yung matagal mo ng ipinapanalangin. Hindi mo lang natagpuan si Tri, pakakasalan mo pa sya ngayon." She paused for a second and reached for my necktie, inayos nya iyon. "Kuya, today your life is about to change. I always know that you'll be a great husband and a superb father, you have all the traits since then. But I hope you'll never forget that you will forever be our son. Hindi ko sinasabi ito dahil may obligation ka sa amin anak, I am telling this just to remind you na, me and your Papa will always be here for you and Bea."
"Thank you Ma." I was relieved because of Mom's words of wisdom. I extended my arms to give her a hug. "Mama's boy pa din ako."
She burst out laughing. "That won't change." Natawa na din ako.
"I'm glad you're not emotional right now Ma. Kala ko crying lady ka kasi ikakasal na favorite anak mo." She slapped my arm, still laughing.
"Syempre, I don't wanna ruin my make up noh. So I'm trying to be cool." Nag wink pa sya.
The light conversation that Mama and I had, soothed my heart. All the negative hunch vanished and I just felt a ripple of excitement at the thought of meeting my love at the altar. I cannot wait to marry my Bea.
***
Everyone in the venue was wearing hues of royal blue and gray. Most of the guests, friends and families were already inside while the members of the entourage were patiently waiting infront of the church.
The time has finally arrived and when the musicians started playing the processional music (Ikaw at Ako violin cover), it gave me goosebumps. This is it!
Kiefer, my Best Man, offered me a fist-bump before marching the walkway.
I was quite emotional when Papa gave me a huge hug and Mama kissed both of my cheeks. Their encouraging gestures made me more confident facing everyone. The moment my parents clung their arms to mine, I took a deep breath and we started walking together down the aisle.
I felt full of the joys of spring as series of flashbacks vividly in my mind - the cringeworthy coffee encounter at the airport, the smile on your face when you agreed to be my girlfriend, our romantic first kiss under the sunset sky, the very moment our bodies intertwined and confessed our feelings, when we parted ways and met unexpectedly in a fastfood chain, our first dinner date as official couple, the warm welcome from our families and friends, the lighthearted bonding that you had with my orphanage kids, our first monthsary, our priceless reactions when we heard that we'll be having a baby, the chopper date for our second month of togetherness and heart-rending proposal, the faraway and coming back phase, the on the spur of the moment proposal and the happiest day in Boracay and the time I finally avowed, it's you.
I was wearing my biggest smile when I reached the front pew where Manong Kiefer was waiting.
Everyone was painting the town red as each members of the entourage slaying the walkway.
Principal Sponsors:
John Maraguinot & Lovel Agno-Maraguinot
Odie De Leon & Gigi Paras
Randy Ravena & Matec Villanueva
Don-Don Crisologo & Sansan Borja
Secondary Sponsors:
To light the candles..
Nico Evangelista & Janel Maraguinot
To place the white veil..
Loel De Leon & Alyssa Valdez
To place the knotted cord..
Coby Lopez & Danielle Theris Ravena
Ring bearer..
Jan Kyrie Nicholas Amer
Coin bearer..
Juan Andres Xavero Angeles
Bible bearer..
Ino Philip Cayetano
Flower girls..
Anaia Almadro
Arya Asistio
Fille Renee Cayetano
Bridesmaids and Groomsmen:
Anton Asistio & Mikaela Cortes
Aaron Black & Alexandrea Enciso
John Adrian Wong & Ariana Herranz
They were all buzzing and beaming with joy as they approached me and utter their good lucks and congratulatory greetings.
It was the Maid of Honor's turn when I felt a little jumpy. Jhoana was peppy and cheery as she ambled along the alley. She was open arms when she came near me so I gave her a light hug.
Mom and Dad's appearance made my heart beats fast. They stopped halfway and then the church door shut for a while.
I was holding my breath as misty rays of light came through the opening door. The moment I saw Bea, it seems like everything was in slow motion. There she was, the love of my life shining and glowing in her white wedding dress. Thank God, she showed up.
My heart started to race as our eyes laid on each other. Bea was smiling genuinely that made me weep for joy. She looks like a goddess walking gracefully along the flowery aisle. I can't take my eyes off you.
It was really a heartwarming scene when Dad and Mom welcomed Bea with a warm embrace, they were all bursting in tears. Despite the keen emotions, Bea still managed to glide elegantly.
And my whole world stops when I see my love, five feet away from me. It was as if it was just you and me, staring lovingly to each other. "I love you." We mouthed in unison that made the two of us giggle and kilig at the same time.
I was taken back to my senses when Manong patted my shoulder. Mom gave me besos while Dad offered a manly hug. I was in pure bliss when Dad held Bea's right hand and handed over me. I wholeheartedly accept it and intertwined with mine.
"You are beyond gorgeous, Babe." I said while staring to her eyes, a perfect complement for my bride.
"And you're very handsome, as always." She whispered lovingly.
Together, Bea and I were facing the altar full-heartedly. Our road to forever.
The whole wedding ceremony was solemn and divine. Most of the time, Bea and I glanced to each other, smiling from ear to ear.
We both stood up when the Priest announced that it's time to exchange of vows. Bea and I were facing each other, holding hands.
Bea cleared her throat while looking intently to my eyes. "Ferdinand Crisologo Ravena III." She mentioned my name dearly. "The moment our eyes met, I knew already that it's you." Her voice was shaky. "Babe, I promise to love you unconditionally, to be devoted above all others, and to find in you, my husband, a light that to me is home. I promise never to let go of your hand, that the hand that I take now, will be the same one I hold in the rainy days of our lives. With all faith and honesty, I promise to fulfill my duties as a wife, a mother and to make a place for God in our home, in our lives, and in our hearts, as we become one." I cannot contain my feelings anymore, her sincere words made my heart melt.
Bea paused for a second as tears flowing down her cheeks. "I take you to be my husband in sickness and in health, to have and to hold, in tears and in joy, in good times and bad – from this day forward in this world and the next. I will look to each day with the joy of knowing that my tomorrow includes you."
"Today, my hand is yours to hold and my heart forever yours to keep. I love you, Thirdy." I kissed both of her hands.
I let out a sigh and stared adoringly to Bea. Her eyes made me calm down like nothing else. "Isabel Beatriz Paras de Leon." She pressed my hands lightly. "Since then, it's you who fill all the emptiness in my heart." I halted as I shed tears. "Babe, I promise to make my life forever yours and build my dreams around you. I promise to be the man that I see now in your eyes, today, tomorrow, and for always. I promise to be there to catch you if you should stumble, carry you over every threshold, and fall in love with you every day. I will take your love to give me hope, give me joy, and make me a better man. I promise to be your faithful husband and responsible father to our child. And I promise to love you when the sun shines, when the rain falls, in sickness, and in health." Both Bea and I were smiling through tears.
"Bea, I lost my way all the way to you and in you, I found my way. I love you always." I enveloped her inside my arms and kissed her forehead.
And as a symbol of true faith and love, Bea and I exchanged rings. Bea puts first the ring on my left ring finger and I did the same to her. I felt like I was walking on air as we celebrated our union with the giving and receiving of rings. I'm yours and you're mine, forever.
Without further ado, the Priest said. "Thirdy and Bea, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."
Everyone was cheery and clapping their hands in glee.
Bea and I gazed to each other eyes, carrying nothing but pure happiness and love. I gently held Bea's face while she wrapped her arms around my neck. We slowly close the gap between us and finally kiss each other tenderly. Our first kiss as official husband and wife.
Our lips parted in a smile. "I love you, Mr. Ravena." She mumbled under her breath.
"And I love you most, Mrs. Isabel Beatriz Ravena."