125. sad hours: open
Adam's last initial is W so I'm giving him the last name Wright (like the Wright brothers)
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Fire, death, panic attack/hallucination
"So he's still going?" You ask, voice soft. You're sitting on top of the couch, hands tucked between your thighs.
Adam throws his head back, next to your leg, as he takes another sip. "Yup." He puts the glass down without looking, still leaning against the couch. His eyes shift from the ceiling to you. "Is it really that bad that I don't want him to leave?"
"Of course not," you pet his hair. "You are his boyfriend, it makes sense that you're concerned."
"Was."
You blink, "What?"
"I was his boyfriend," Adam murmurs sadly.
Your mouth drops open. "Wait, did he-"
"No." He sighs, "I did. I thought it would be better with no strings intact, but I'm just as miserable as before."
"You guys have been together for a while," you pause, not quite sure what to do, "It's not going to be easy to forget all that you've been through." You slide down to sit on the couch, and his head falls to rest on his shoulder.
Adam bites his lip, eyes glassy. "I just want him to be safe, but he doesn't care."
"I'm sure he cares."
"Well, I'm not."
You sigh and reach up to pat his cheek. "You'll get through this. I'll be with you the every step of the way."
"Thank you, Y/n."
"Anytime."
☾
The screens are programmed to turn on at the mention of "Garrison," which can be helpful when preparing to cleanup rumors. Sometimes, you wish they didn't.
"The Galaxy Garrison mission to the distant moon of Kerberos is missing, and all crew members are believed to be dead. The Galaxy Garrison has said the crash was presumably caused by pilot error. It is, indeed, a sad day for all humanity."
"Turn that off, right now!" You yell, and one of the nearby officers scrambles in fear to find a remote. "Adam?!" You quickly scan the room. He's not here.
You run out the door before it opens completely, shoulder slamming into it. Hissing in pain, you grab the spot with your hand. You have more important things to worry about. "Adam?!"
You run through the halls, papers flying out of startled officers' hands. "Adam!"
"Adam?!"
"Where are you?!"
You stop in the middle of the hall.
He had a meeting today, didn't he?
You turn around and keep running.
In the corner of your eye, you see Iverson disappear into his office. He's going to have to clean this up with the public. Sure a statement about "pilot error" was given, but death is a serious issue. You don't stop for him.
Meeting Room G comes into view, and you keep speeding towards the door.
"Adam!"
The door opens and you stop, breathing heavily.
It's almost silent.
The news report is still going, the woman's monotone and almost completely emotionless.
Adam is sitting on the floor, arms resting on his knees, eyes glued to the screen.
You walk in slowly and sink down to sit next to him. "Adam..."
"He's gone, Y/n." Adam begins to shake. "He's gone."
You pull him into your arms. "I'm sorry, Adam, I'm so sorry."
His eyes move to you. "I didn't try hard enough to stop him. He could still be here! It's my fault."
"No, it is not!" Your hold on him tightens. "He chose to go to space. It was his dream. You did all you could, and I'll be damned if you blame this on yourself when you have nothing to do with it. It was his choice to make."
"But still, I could have-"
"No," you glare at him. "He could have chosen to stay. The only one who's responsible is Shiro himself. Remember that."
Adam is silent.
"Say it's not your fault, Adam," you whisper. "I need you to believe it."
He still doesn't say anything.
"Adam..."
"It's-" he takes in a deep breath, "It's not my fault."
"That's right," you stroke his hair. "It's not your fault."
You weren't as close with Shiro, but you spent a lot of time with him since he was dating your best friend. Your vision blurs as your eyes water. You wipe away your tears before they can fall.
☾
Adam holds an iris in his hand. It's a beautiful shade of purple and had only bloomed a few days ago. He's staring off at the horizon, and you can't tell if the glassy look in his eyes is from sadness or exhaustion.
You put a hand on his shoulder. "Adam?"
He blinks, coming back from wherever his mind had wandered off to. "Oh, yes, sorry- I'm ready. Light it."
"Alright." You reach into your pocket and pull out your lighter, holding it underneath the flower. The iris is set ablaze.
Adam holds it in his hand for a moment. He whispers, "Goodbye Takashi," and throws it into the metal bucket.
You watch as it burns, petals crinkling and turning black. The fire spreads quickly, moving on to the stem. It only takes a few moments for the entire flower to burn, small embers flickering as the ash burns, now turning almost white. You kick the can, not forcefully enough to knock it over, but just enough to stir up the ash.
Waiting a few moments for any flickers to burn out, you take Adam's hand. "Are you ready?"
He gives you a small nod.
You reach down and lift up the metal tin, passing it to your friend.
"I guess this is goodbye forever." He grabs the bottom of it and turns it upside down.
The ash falls out, and a strong gust of wind blows as if on cue, scattering them in the wind. You watch them go.
Adam stares after them.
You let go of his hand to wrap your arm around his shoulder. "Let's go inside, okay?"
He nods. "Okay..."
☾
It's been a slow process, getting Adam back to his old self. But he's almost there. You were less affected, but seeing the state your best friend is in hurts your heart.
Now you've taken two steps back.
"What do you mean you had Shiro, but he escaped?!" You slam your hands down on Iverson's desk.
"Officer Shirogane was quarantined under the specifications of our protocol, and four cadets helped him to escape," Iverson explains. "That is immediately before the blue lion appeared. Admiral Sanda has decided we cannot allow the world to know about aliens yet, so everything that transpired after the Kerberos mission must remain within the Garrison grounds."
"Adam is one of our best officers, and he has been incapacitated because of his misplaced guilt over Shiro's death, and you're telling me Shiro is still alive?!" You lean over the desk. "You need to tell him that Shiro is okay."
"I feel your pain, Officer L/n, I really do," Iverson sighs. "But given our failure to maintain Office Shirogane's place in quarantine, we cannot allow the rest of the compound to know. All but the highest ranked officials will be left in the dark, as you were supposed to be. We cannot let Officer Wright know about this."
You cross your arms. "What's going to stop me from telling him myself, then?"
"Would you really do that to him, L/n?"
Your hands fall to your sides. "What... do you mean?"
"Officer Wright has experienced losing his close friend once already, presumed dead."
You stop yourself from snorting at "close friend" due to the serious atmosphere. "Yes..."
"Officer Shirogane just disappeared into space again. He was missing his right arm the first time he came back. He might not return a second time, or he could be even more damaged." He pauses for the thought to sink in. "Do you really want to give him potentially false hope?"
You curse under your breath. "Well, Commander, you actually have a point."
"I'm sorry it has to be this way, Officer L/n."
You nod, not sure what to say. "Excuse me," you turn and walk out of his office.
☾
The Galra are invading. "All officers report to your stations," the alarm rings.
Adam jumps up. "I have to go, the attack is starting."
You grab his arm, "Adam!"
He looks back at you.
"Be safe, okay?"
"I always am." He gives you a smile and starts running. "I love you, Y/n!"
You start running towards his station. "Love you too!"
☾
You sit at one of the monitors, listening to Commander Holt.
"You've just doomed those men and women," he glares at Admiral Sanda.
You monitor the pilots, but they're all disappearing quickly. Panicked messages start flooding in.
"Our weapons have no effect!" Adam's voice comes over the radio.
"Wildcat's gone. Titan's not responding," one of the male pilots says.
One of the female pilots comes in. "I can't shake these things. He's got me on target lock!"
"Hang in there! I'm heading your way!"
"I can't- No!" There's an explosion and the female pilot's communications monitor turns red.
Only three out of the ten pilots remain.
"Be aware, another Galra fleet is launching and approaching," one of the two remaining female pilots says. She's drops off the board in an explosion.
"I've got target lock," the last female says. "No!"
Adam screams.
There's another explosion and all of the pilots monitors are red.
"Adam..."
All of the officers are speechless, staring at the screen.
Sendak opens a line, but it's drowned out as you stare at the ground, vision blurred with tears.
Adam was the last person you had. Now you have... no one.
The Admiral has finished speaking with Sendak. Veronica reads back analysis from the other Garrison bases. Captain Holt gives an order.
"I will court-martial you if you utter one command against my orders," the Admiral declares.
Iverson argues, "There won't be a court to try me in if we don't listen to Commander Holt."
The MFE pilots are instructed to go.
You stand up and move to the front of the room.
The Admiral turns her head. "Officer L/n, what are you doing? Get back to your station!"
You clench your fist before slapping her in the face. "See you in hell, Admiral." You turn on your heel and walk out.
"Officer L/n, I will remove you from your post!"
The door shuts behind you. "Like I care..."
☾
You stand near the edge of the particle barrier, watching the buildings burn in the city. Adam... He- His body is out there somewhere. Or it might not be, the Galra weapons are powerful things and- You sink down to your knees.
You can see the hill where Adam burned the iris in Shiro's place. The hill itself is burning now, the single tree at its top completely ablaze.
Your eyes are glued to it, the flames. It's so far away, but you can almost feel the heat of the sparks flying off and singing the hair on your fingers. You drop your head down, staring directly at the ground in between your palms. It's spinning, why is it spinning?
You can't see the fire anymore, but the smoke is everywhere. It's in your lungs, it stings your eyes. Your breath gets faster. In, out, in, out, in out in out inoutinoutin-
Someone's hand is on your back. "Officer- Y/n. Breathe slowly, okay? You'll be okay." The voice is drowned out in the phantom popping and cracking of burning wood.
You try. One slow, shaky breath in, a coughing fit starts on the way out.
"Hey, it's fine, okay? You're fine," the voice is familiar.
You keep trying, but you just- You can't. You keep coughing, and it's worse each time.
"Oh god," he rubs your shoulder. "Try and swallow, anything to stop coughing, okay? It'll just get worse if you throw up."
You breathe in through your nose, but the smell of the smoke is still there. What's something you like? Sometimes smoke is nice, right? Like incense, or the smokey smell of meat being cooked. That's good, right? Just imagine that, you tell yourself.
"I'm so hungry," you whine. "When is the food going to be ready?"
Adam laughs and pats your head. "It'll be ready soon, you big baby. Shiro's making pork belly."
"Mmm," you hum, "I love Shiro."
"He's my boyfriend, step back."
The smell of the meat seeps into the room and you take in a deep breath. "I love food more than Shiro, don't worry." You keep taking in deep breaths and sighing. "Oh god, it smells really good."
He laughs again, "Well, if you just want to smell the meat, I'll eat your pieces."
Your head snaps up. "No! This will be mine."
"I'm just teasing, Y/n," Adam boops your nose. "You're gonna get your share. The promise still stands."
"Everything shall be shared equally with no secrets, and one shall especially never do anything dangerous without telling the other... most likely because the other will join," you recite.
"Yep."
You smile, "And so it shall always be."
"Food's ready!" Shiro yells.
You jump out of your chair and run out the door. "Yes, finally! First dibs on choosing!"
"No, Y/n!" Adam runs after you.
You open your eyes, breathing slowly. The sky is cloudy above you, orange-tinted with the particle barrier. There's a small breeze blowing across the runway, and you can feel a chill from the tear tracks on your face.
Cadet Griffin is above you, extremely worried. "Y/n, are you alright? I think you passed out." Cadet Rizavi is next to him, leaning over his shoulder to feel your temperature.
"Is..." You stare at the orange sky, remembering the sudden change in the morning. "So it is real... He's really-" You close your eyes.
"We're so very sorry, Officer," Rizavi says. "We lost a lot of good people today."
Even though your eyes are closed, you cover them with your hands. You don't want to see the world. "We didn't need to lose them." You push yourself into a sitting position.
"Woah, easy," Griffin puts his hands up. "We don't want you to get lightheaded."
You turn to look at him, "I'm going to do what I want. Know your place, Cadet."
"Of course. Sorry, Officer."
Brushing yourself off, you stand up with a sigh. "Sorry, I know that was harsh. Thank you for caring, Cadets." You look at each of them, "Griffin, Rizavi," before turning and walking back towards the main building.
If what Commander Holt said is true, Shiro is alive out there somewhere and part of the most powerful weapon in the entire goddamn universe. You're going to get him back here and make him finish the war he started - the war that took Adam's life.
If he can't, you don't know what you'll do.
Sorry that was a sad one :( but honestly Voltron did Adam so dirty why