Heyo
Enjoy~
(Y/n)'s POV
I rejected yet another invite to hang out, setting my phone on the treadmill and turning it on. My legs were weak and tired, the burning sensation unbearable, but I kept tearing down the muscles until I physically couldn't anymore.
I had even begun to recite spells in my head while I ran rather than listening to music. Even in between working out and studying, I managed to work heavily with different creatures that Mr. Alfor had to offer. I couldn't have any surprises.
My heart beat intensely, my aching arm muscles moving along with me as I ran. I ran for 20 more minutes, upping the speed halfway through, until the gym would soon be closing. I hurried off, wiping my sweat away and gathered my clothes. I could shower back at the dorm.
I hardly cared about winning.
I was just far too weak to survive, and that was the truth.
I practically hobbled down the hallway, most of it completely empty. Prefects had stopped caring if I walked around past the hours, knowing where I was headed anyways. Most people would stare at me as class went by, waiting for the moment all the stress snapped me in half.
I shut my eyes for a moment as I walked, the hot sweat on my skin drying and making my skin tight and cold. I heard my name echo out through the hallway, and I winced as I turned.
"(Y/n), are you okay?"
"Lance what are you doing out, you'll get caught," I said and he shook it off.
"Nothing I haven't done before, why the hell are you out? You look like you're going to pass out," he said, crouching to slip under my arm.
"The Tournament."
"We don't care if you win (y/n), you shouldn't be killing yourself like this," he said, helping me back to the dorm; now I was suddenly dizzy.
"I'm not trying to win, I'm trying to survive," I said, feeling the muscles of his body tighten.
"You're strong (y/n)."
"No, I'm not, I'm far from it," I said.
"You're training too hard, ease up a little," he said, pulling a different approach.
"Don't tell me what to do. You don't get it," I said, pushing him away. I was tired and exhausted, only room for anger to seep out of me.
"(Y/n).."
"Oh screw you. You don't get it! You don't have the weight of being in front of everyone, representing your entire school. You don't have the weight of your last parent counting on you to stay safe. So why don't you just go make out with your stupid perfect girlfriend, with your stupid perfect life, and just go fuck yourself Lance."
He stood before me, confused and dazed rather than irate with me. He seemed hurt that I had said the things that I did, but in the moment, I could hardly comprehend the idea of caring.
"You just going to stand there like an idiot? I always have to keep my mouth shut, and you do noting but make my life worse. You and your girlfriend, or you and our family, you never just leave me alone! So go away!" I spat, turning around and heading to my dorm. Perhaps if he hadn't hugged me in that gym that day, I wouldn't have said those mean things.
It was far from fair.
It wasn't fair of me to say that to him.
It wasn't fair of me to leave him alone in the hallway like after he tried helping me.
It wasn't fair that I couldn't catch a break when it came to Lance.
Nothing was fair.
I pulled open the door, rubbing at dry eyes. I passed by my sleeping friends and practically almost collapsed before I could get in the shower. I cried as hot water washed away my sweat at tears. I cried as long as I could, my face red and puffy after my shower. I looked like hell.
A new weigh, of what I had said to Lance had set over me, and I could barely stand to be around myself. I collapsed in bed, my eyes still glossy and my breath still shallow. I shut my eyes tightly, water sitting at the edges.
Lance's POV
"Mamá?"
"Yeah I know it's late," I said. She garbled on and on in the phone receiver.
"Mom, something happened." I went silent for a while.
"You remember how you told me to be nice to (y/n)?"
"I messed up."
"She's been training nonstop for the Tournament, and I told her she didn't need to go so hard at it, that she was going to get hurt herself, but she just exploded," I said, my voice quivering slightly. My moms voice gently hugged me from the other end.
"Mamá she said I make her life worse," I said and the line on the other side went quiet for a moment.
She asked me to explain just what she had said, and I spilled everything, her hurtful words still freshly imprinted in my brain.
"Mijo, I'm certain she did not mean it, and she is under a lot of pressure. Especially if you found her after a long day. You have to be understanding, and speak with her, perhaps at a better time. She shouldn't have hurt your feelings mijo, and I know your feel bad now, but communication is key." I heard her pause, and there was something else she wanted to say, but she held back.
"Gracias mamá, I'll try talking to her tomorrow."
"De nada mijo, just don't get too upset about it. She most certainly didn't mean it. She likes you a lot," she said. I widened my eyes but whispered a soft okay before we said goodnight.
...Why don't you just go make out with your stupid perfect girlfriend...
...Make my life worse, you and your girlfriend...
I sank down on my mattress. Was that part of the problem. I knew she was stressed, but maybe part of the reason was because of Nyma. On choosing day, my father had called her my girlfriend, and she seemed upset. For a while she wouldn't talk to me because Nyma felt threatened.
My relationship was affecting her, in a way it shouldn't. She was getting dragged into it, and it was stressing her out.
It was my fault.
Perhaps it was best if I did just stay away, kept Nyma away from her. Then she couldn't get roped into any drama.
There was a part of me that thought she was jealous. Jealous of Nyma, and that she wanted to be with me. I doubted that though, as she hated me from the get go, and being friends was as far as her limit would take her.
Even if she was, which I was sure she wasn't, I couldn't do anything about it other than stay away. I couldn't break up with Nyma, I liked her way too much, and I didn't really see (y/n) like that anymore.
But I wanted to do something about it.
But she didn't even like me, I was sure of it.
So why was I thinking about it?
I want to be a better friend to you.
Had those words hurt her? Put her in the friend zone? Or were they just words that I was thinking too hard about?
(Y/n) didn't like me.
I know it.
~Calymari