Ben
I never lived with so many people in one house. I knew this was going to be a big change for me and my life and it was going to take a while in getting used to this change. I woke up early to go for a run with my wolf. I haven't had a real conversation with Neema since she came to live with us. We greet each other every day but that's about it. I don't even know what to talk about with her. I was 18 the last time I saw my sister. We are both now adults we are not the same as we once were.
I don't even know where to start. I haven't talked to Zoe either. I can't even look at her. Every time I see her I go back to the time when her teeth were inside Imani's arm. She still has a scar from that. I almost lost my daughter that day. And I feel Zoe feels the same way too because she doesn't make eye contact with me either.
Although we all have our own scars we have yet to heal from I know we will make it through it. I have to for Zora and for Imani. After my run, I came back home to take a shower before everyone woke up for breakfast. Oliva was awake by the time I entered our room.
I went to sit next to her on the bed. We haven't talked since I introduced my family to my sister and daughter. I didn't like how she behaved during that dinner. I know this isn't easy for her, but it doesn't help the Luna of my pack is being disrespectful to my family.
"Oliva, I know this is hard for you. And trust me the last thing I want is to make you and Benjy feel left out or underappreciated. I love you both and I am doing this for our family. Neema and Zoe are part of our family too and as the Luna of this pack, I would love it if you could be more understanding toward them. I know this lifestyle is hard enough being that your human and you never had to deal with something like this before. And I am grateful for all the these you stood by my side. I haven't forgotten about that. I don't even know what I am doing. But I am willing to try. I need you." I said. I took her hand and kissed it.
"I love you. We can't change the past but we can control the path we choose to take." I said giving her hand a squeeze.
Oliva takes a deep breath and looks up at me "I know, I know. And I hear you, Ben. And I am sorry for my behavior. When I choose to keep Benjy and be part of your pack I knew that also came with a huge responsibility. I also know and understand the pain you were going through in searching for your sister." She says. I smile and give her a kiss on the cheek for being so understanding.
"But Ben I have to ask even though it hurts I have to say it." She says looking into my eyes.
"If--if Zora never left would you still have been with her?" She asks. I let out a sigh and take both of her hands. Because Oliva is human and she wasn't raised the same way as everyone in the pack she doesn't understand the bond and connection of a mate. What makes being married to Oliva very difficult is that we can't read each other thoughts and our souls are not connection compared to a werewolf couple. Oliva doesn't understand the concept of soulmates and having to be bonded by someone forever.
"Yes, I would. Zora was my mate and I loved her with all my heart. If she was alive and never left I would have married and started my life with her and she would have been the Luna of my pack. But she's not the Luna of my pack, She's here and she's not alive. But our daughter is." I said giving her an honest answer. Every since Oliva got pregnant with our child I have always been open and honest with her about everything especially since she isn't a wolf and I can't read her mind.
Oliva looks away and takes a deep breath. "Okay. Thank you for being honest." She says.
I lean in to pull her into a hug but she pushes me away from her "Ew, no go take a shower." She says. I laugh and give her a kiss on the lips and walk over towards the bathroom. "We can take a shower together?" I said rising up my eyebrows.
Lately, I notice Zoe and Imani are not talking as much as they used too. It seems like they got into a fight with each other. I don't understand why because when Zoe first came here Imani and Zoe got along quickly. I know Benjy and Imani were having issues but not everyone is upset at each other. I have to find a way to get them to talk with one another and to help with Benjy and Imani's relationship.
I took Imani and Zoe to the packhouse to show them our history. I am sure Neema never told Zoe about our history. The girls were excited to learn and see how many famous historical figures came from our pack. After our history session, I told the girls and Neema that I plan to introduce them to the pack in two months.
In a few weeks, I plan to take Neema and Imani with me to the cabin to find clues about Zora. It has been hard to balance being the chief of police, being an alpha, and being a father. I haven't had time to focus on my family because of pack stuff and work. I am nervous about what clues we will find. I hope Imani isn't endangered. I am also nervous about how the pack will react to Neema and Zoe. Everyone has gotten used to her disappearance and have moved on. And now she's back with a mixed breed daughter I am afraid of the reaction they will get from the pack.
There have been many attacks from hunter recently and that's been keeping me busy from being home more often. I don't understand why lately hunters have been very bold in attacking our territory. We are one of the oldest and strongest packs in the world. You would think they would think twice before coming here. My beta thinks we could have a spy in our pack and that's why hunters are able to easily invade our territory and catch us in a moment of weakness. I also agree that we could have a spy but I have no idea who.
There are a few humans that know about our existence and pride themselves in hunting us. They hunt werewolves for their fur and teeth. Vampires for their blood since it can be used for medicine. Vampire's blood can cure a lot of sicknesses. They also hunt trolls for their gold and diamonds, but they are very hard to find since they live underground. Mermaids for their skin, eyes, and jewels. I just pray this doesn't become something serious and we can end it quickly.
Today I am picking up Benjy from school since he is still on punishment. We haven't had a real conversation since my sister and niece came to live with us. As I am driving us home I decided to start the conversation.
"Benjy, I know we haven't had a chance to talk and I am sorry for not being able to make time for you," I said.
"Ngiyazi." He said with a sigh. ( I know)
"I talked to your mother and I am sorry for putting you guys through this. But---"
"I know, I know. Be nice. I get dad." I don't understand Benjy's attitude.
"Okay, please tell me what is the issue? Because I can't read your mind.---Oh well I could, but anyway. I know you're upset so don't lie to me. Are you upset about the fact I have another child? or because the house is now full are you uncomfortable at home?" I asked. Benjy doesn't say anything for a while and I wait for him to respond.
"I--I feel left out." He says. "I wish you came to me first before you brought everyone in. I can't tell you how I feel because I haven't had a chance to process how I feel." He said. I nod my head taking in what he says.
"I'm sorry you feel left out son because I promise you that is not my intention. If I knew I had a daughter I would have told you and your mother a long time ago. I never would have expected getting a call about a hunter attack in a club would lead me to find my daughter and lost sister. Just like you, I am still processing everything. I don't even know what I am doing right now. Your sister is grown I--I don't know how I should act around her. Unlike Imani, I have been with you since you were born." I said sharing my thoughts.
"I'm sorry dad if I am being selfish. I don't mean---"
"No. You have the right to your feelings Benjy. And I don't want you to feel like you're being shut out or I am choosing one other the other. Imani and you are both my children and I will protect and love you both. Yes, your mother and I are not mates. But we have made it work the best we can ever since you were born. And with Imani, you can say my love has grown. It doesn't mean I love you any less. And if you feel like I am ignoring you or not taking your feelings into account. Don't be afraid to call me out." In the corner of my eye, I can see Benjy smiling.
"Thanks, dad. And I want to say I am not angry. I just don't know how to act around them either. Imani and Zoe are not in my age group and there both girls. I don't know what to do or say around them. And they don't know our culture." He said.
"I agree and I'll I ask is you try. Imani and Zoe are both trying their best. Even I don't know how to act around my own sister and I grew up with her." I said.
"I guess we all have to try our best." He says.
"Yes, we do," I said with a smile. Listening to Benjy I realize it wasn't as bad as I thought. Benjy is young and he is still growing so I can understand if he doesn't know how to express himself correctly. It's my job as his father to acknowledge his feelings and help him recognize the emotions he is feeling.
"Um...Dad." Benjy said looking down at his feet. "Will Imani become next in line in being the Alpha if I can't shift?" He asks.
"Is that what's also been bothering you?" I asked.
"Listen Benjy you are still young and have a long way to go until you take over this pack. You just need to focus on school and getting stronger. Are you late for your age to shift? yes, but that doesn't mean it won't happen and I will do whatever it takes in helping you shift." I said. If Imani was born here yes, she could have been next in line to be the Alpha, but since she is a royal wolf it won't be possible.
After dinner, I called Neema to join me in the backyard to talk and drink wine. We didn't say anything for the first few minutes and drink our wine in silence while looking up at the crescent moon.
"Ngiyaxolisa," (I'm sorry) Neema said. I turn my head in shock. I never thought I would hear those words from her mouth. I didn't even think I would ever hear those words from her.
"I'm sorry for the pain I put you and our family through. There wasn't a day I didn't want to come back home. I thought maybe until Zoe turned 5 and my mate calmed down everything with his clan we could finally be free to live a family. And I wouldn't be able to hide anymore. But after he got killed by his own clan I kne--I felt there wasn't any place safe for us. And I didn't want to put our pack at risk, Benjamin." Neema turns her face to face me.
"I should have told you about Zora and her plans. There is no excuse. She is your mate and you had the right to know. And I am sorry I let you down. I'll spend the rest of my life making this up to you and your family." She says with tears in her eyes. I look away and take a deep breath. What Neema said hurts me deep. I don't know how to respond. I still haven't had a chance to get other Zora's death. And I don't know I'll ever will. I took a sip of my wine and took another deep breath.
"I don't have an answer for you." I said trying to keep my emotions in check.
"I know and that's fine because I ruined our relationship." She says leaning back in her chair.
"How was Nora when you last saw her?" I asked.
"Umm....She looked like she is worried about something. But she wouldn't tell me what. She seemed upset and nervous. Zora told me she just wanted to clean her head without anyone finding her and following her. I thought she would come back to the pack. I didn't think she would leave for a decade." She answers. I nod my head as I listen.
I met Zora when I was in high school. She is the same age as my sister when I was a sophomore she was a senior. I had a few more months until my shift so at the time I didn't know she would become my mate. But Zora knew she knew along and I think that's why she approached me first. At the time I found her annoying as my older sister. She would always find ways to burst into my room without knocking and embarrassing me every chance she got. It was like having two annoying little sisters. And when I would have crushes on other girls Zora would always try to cock block me. But it wasn't until I turned 16 and shifted I realized why she did all those things.
Wolf's age and human age are different. By the time you are 16 and go through your first shift, you are an adult. So on the night of my coming to age party, Zora came to me and told me I am her mate. Zora is the opposite of me and it was very hard to understand her at first. She was so full of life and color. While I liked to stay in the back and blend in with everyone. Although we were both different we loved each other very much and I would do anything to see her smile.
"I am thinking we go back to your cabin and see if we could find any clues about Zora," I said.
"I do have a few things she left behind," Neema said nodding her head in agreement. I tell Neema that I also plan to take Imani with us too. I also tell her it seems like Zoe and Imani are not getting along anymore. But she told me not to worry and the girls will figure it out on their own.
"When Imani told me Zora died. I didn't know what to do. I never thought I would hear those words." Neema said.
"Me too." I said with a sigh.
"I always thought about you and her. I always wondered if you two got married yet and if you had kids. What your children look like and if Zora is still giving you a hard time." She said with a laugh. "I wonder how mom and dad were doing and if they enjoyed playing with their grandkids. Would mom and dad love Zoe? would Zoe be playing with her cousins? How was your thanksgiving like?" I can hear Neema crying even more and it breaks my heart. The future we dreamed about is no longer.
"I wish I could have told her, thank you. Thank you for being my sister and that I love you." She said.
I took another sip of my wine and looked up at the moon. Every day I wish to just be able to see her. One more time. Just one more time I wish I could touch her and tell her I love her. And I'm sorry. I felt a tear fall down my eye and I quickly wiped it away. I get up from my seat.
"Well, I'm down for the night." I said trying to shake off these emotions.
I was about to tell Neema goodnight when my phone rang.
"Sawubona," I answered.
"Yes, Alpha. I have some unusual activity to report." One of my pack subordinates told me.
"What is it?" I asked confused.
"We have reported a rouge wolf has made its way into our territory."