No. I do not love her.
That's what I told myself, after meeting Y/N L/N.
As a butler of the Phantomhive household, I have no time for love. It was a amusing human emotion and social mechanic. Something I watch mortals and contracts alike blame for their child-like sins, which would eventually spiral into their demise.
Busy with my Young Master, the other servants of the household, the chores of my own, I had absolutely no interest in requiring a ' one true love ' or ' soulmate ', as humans call it. This was a pretty lie humans idiotically idolize and praise.
But, I suppose not all humans are like this...
...
... What ever is the matter with me? A simple mortal human is driving me mad...
" Sebastian! Are you ignoring me?! " Snapped the young master, bringing me to my senses. Currently I stand in the lord's study, listening to him rant on and on and on...
Things like this get rather boring, believe it or not.
It's a good thing you humans are so, predictable.
" Why of course, My Lord. " I smoothly reply, the words leaving my lips like honey dripping fresh out of it's hive. " You were quite rightfully displaying your concern for tonight's ball, especially for the duke. He'll be wanting to visit his daughter. "
Lord Phantomhive's cheeks dusted a light hue of pink at the mentor of the duke's daughter, which was hilarious. " Don't get cocky, Sebastian. Now go check on the stupid garden ball preparations. " Ciel snapped, dismissing his butler with a wave. " That's an order. ".
" Yes my Lord. " I calmly reply, bowing slightly as I do. Turning to leave, I take note to check the Phone Directory for gravel purchase. ' Finnian has probably has destroyed the gardens by now... '.
" Sebastian? " I hear a confident, feminine voice behind me. I feel myself smile as I know who it is in an instant. " Yes, Lady Y/N? " I ask, turning to face her. Her arms where crossed, she was in her F/C dress. She looked somewhat concerned, but a glint within her deep pools of E/C said otherwise. " Sebastian, do you need any help? " The foreign girl asked politely, keeping her gaze to my blood red gaze. I offer her my genuine smile. " Really, My Lady, you always concern about other's well being. " I passively state. " Is that so wrong? " She croons, coming to my side as we walk through the aged manor. " I believe it's common where your from? " I pretend to ask, raising one of my eyebrows. I already know much about her country, I've visited it much in my long life.
" They're concerned and such in my homeland, but we cannot speak up. " She replies sadly, a frown on her features. Her gaze is a mixed emotion of annoyed, pissed off, and saddened. I myself chuckle lightly. " I myself can't imagine you ever followed those rules yourself. " It was half - true, I smelt it in her soul. It was so strong, I was suprised myself a demon hadn't tried to steal her strong, independent, been-through-hell-and-back-yet-pure soul. Her gaze meets mine as I look down to her as we walk. The foreign girl returned the chuckle, her E/C gaze smiling.
As we walk through the manor in conversation, she suddenly seemed upset. " Are you alright, My Lady? " I arch one of my eyebrows, my crimson gaze boreing into her E/C.
" ...Mr. Sebastian? " She croons, finally meeting my gaze once more.
" Yes Madam? " I reply, tone reassuring. Funny how humans are so fragile.
"... Do you promise to ensure my safety whenever you can? " She asks, tone a tad nervous. A terrified look washed over her. She was drowning in fear - scent.
She's hiding something. Something troubling her.
We both pause at a large window that overlooked the Phantomhive Garden, her favorite place in the manor. She often stood there, humming songs to herself in her native language.
" Lady L/N, as the Phantomhive butler of this estate, I am always obliged to protect you. " I state, tone serious and cold. I turn to face her, My Lady's facial features have softened slightly.
" Thank you Sebastian... I am in your debt. "
~~~
.:Time Skip To That Evening:.
~~~
It was the awaited evening of the Phantomhive Garden Ball. Somehow, that no - good gardener Finnian hadn't managed to destroy the white rose gardens. Usually he - with the help of Bard - burns the potted plants kept in the greenhouse. Somehow he even does it by himself.
Anyways, now's not the time to think about Phantomhive servants.
The garden tonight was rather beautiful, the evening's full, pale moonlight overcasting the snow - white roses so they appeared silver. The lawns where mowed to be clean and neat, the stone paths where swept. Many ladies wore elegant and colorful gowns, extravagant hairstyles accompanied them. The gentlemen that escorted them matched their tuxedos in hues, a few proper enough to wear gloves.
I stood at the two large, grand oak doors that where the main entrance to the estate, greeting every boring mortal after another. Really, they all start to sound the same. At least My Lady tries to be interesting.
But, she doesn't try. It's her precious nature, carefully crafted within her tasteful soul. I've met many others from the same country, but they where never quite the same. They're...
Tarnished.
Humans let their souls get tainted. The most obvious warning sighs could be placed in front of them by piggish God himself and they'd ignore them. For this I have only sold myself to quality souls, no matter how long I will starve.
" I suggest we all join Earl Phantomhive in the ballroom for a fine waltz this evening. " I announce to the party, offering them all a fake smile. All their souls smelled horrid, besides My Lord, of course. " W-What? Sebastian?! " The young lord stuttered beside me, completely taken aback. I kneel to his level to whisper to him.
" The night is winding down. And besides, our suspect didn't bother to show. It'd be smart to buy us more time to plan another attack. "
" SEBASTIAN!!! "
It's Y/n.
She's in danger.
Fear and pain laced her accented voice. In an instant I breakneck turn, my crimson gaze searching desperately, my falsehood humanoid heart thumping like a hare being rabbited. My now silted gaze catches her form, a free arm reaching out for me. Fear plastered her features, her irises inhumanly small. She fought against her father's hard grip, who was forcing them to the exit. " Shut it dammit! We're going home! " He hissed, occasionally cursing at her as he attempted to force her away.
Something inside me snapped.
I felt my gaze turn fuchsia and silted, a sudden feeling of need to protect, comfort, and possibility murder someone. It wasn't quite either of the three, but not quite a mix. It was it's own emotion.
What in hell was it?
At that moment it didn't matter. In my demonic speed I ran through the crowd, easily catching up to Mr. L/N. My trembling fist threw into the fan's jaw. I felt my white - knuckled fist being caught mid- air. Both our gazes meet, and I finally realize.
He's a demon.
At least the same tier as myself, if not higher.
I stare into his dark E/C gaze, to find My Lady's own orbs reflecting back. The man smirked, his gaze turning to match my devilishly fuchsia gaze. " So, I meet the famous Sir Crow. " He taunted, sending a powerful kick to my legs to send me off balance. I stumble, but I narrowly dodge a skull shattering punch to my temple.
He's obviously a strong familiar type. Something that wouldn't have to be so small.
I land on my feet, skidding backwards. I grab one of the metal tables, lunging forward at him. Furrowing my brow deeper, my teeth clenching, I throw the object at him, sending it flying faster with a violent kick. I watch midair as the table hits him, plummeting him into the cement path. For good measure I send stainless steel silverware at him for good measure. He kicked the table off himself, flying towards me, knuckles white. He sent a blow to my collarbone, and I started to fall back to the garden. I land into the middle of the small white rose labyrinth, creating a crater. He sent my own silverware back to me, pinning me to the ground. A particular knife landed in me square in the chest.
The foreign man landed on my side, landing on his feet. He had blood running down his face from his temple, along with multiple stains on his attire with the small crimson liquid. Mr. L/N smirked, demonic gaze looking into mine. " Seems The Raven is a little roosty, eh? " He laughed at his speech, getting on his knees to face me. My one open gaze sees his taunting expression as he raised a sharp gardening tool. My vision began to haze as I lost more and more demonic ink disguised as human blood.
Suddenly, there was a loud THWACK heard behind Mr. L/N. He falls to my side unconscious, and I assume he'd been hit in the nape of the neck with something rather powerful. I look up to see Y/N herself, a shovel in her clutches. One of the Phantomhive knives was seemingly taped to be aimed to his nape.
Her expresssion was twisted in anger for another few heartbeats, before taking a few deep breaths from the adrenaline before looking to me. My gaze is starting to haze more out of focus.
" SEBASTIAN! " She yells to me before attempting to comunicate something else, before my ears violently ring. I hear more people run to my side, and feel as they aren't light footsteps.
I can name them all.
" Mr. Sebastian! " Mey - Rin.
" Sebastian sir! " Finnian.
" Sebastian! Cmon, git yourself up! " Bardroy.
I cannot hear any longer as I fade away into darkness. There's a throbbing in my head.
~~~
LATER THAT EVENING!
Y/N POV
~~~
I sigh silently to myself as I push the Phantomhive tea-cart down the dark hallway that lead to Sebastian's quarters. It had been only 3 hours since the great battle with my father.
I'm not very sure what to think about it.
Anyways, I had prepared a fresh set of cloths and hot water along with a black bottle filled halfway with a inhuman substance. I brought along a roll of bandages, just in case. The last time I checked on him, he was groaning about how his head ached. I simply told him, with the little medical knowledge and understanding of demonic anatomy I have, reasoned he must've lost a lot of Demon ' Ink ' as we call it here.
I reach Mr. Sebastian's door, and I gently knock, hearing for any sign of life. Usually he wasn't in there at all, always working, but of course he was now. " ...Yes? " I faintly hear, and open the door to be faced with the {in}famous butler himself.
" My Lady! " He smiled, groaning painfully as he tried to sit up. Sighing and furrowing my brow, I come to his side. " Shush,... You're still too injured to move. " I insist quietly, carefully and gently pushing him back onto his bed. He was shirtless, chest covered in bandages. Pools of inky midnight blue stained his bandage from where his own silverware had deceived him.
The cut must've ran deep enough to strike him in his fake human heart.
Sighing, I turn to the tea-cart and grabbing a cloth and dipping it in the warm water. Taking the bottle disguised as vanilla extract, I let a few drops fall onto the damp cloth. Rubbing the cloth so the substance ran through it, I heard him breathe through his nose.
It was a peaceful sound, oddly. To hear some other- dimensional being- no, Sebastian Michealis being at ease even if it where to be brief. The silence held out a bit longer before I decided to speak up. " Why? " I plainly ask, letting the strong barrier fall. My father always said he saw my mother within when I did that, taking care of people. " Whatever do you mean? " My patient asked, genuine concern lacing his quiet yet weakened voice.
I inhaled silently as I pause my work. Another section of that wall buried deep inside of me crumbled. No use hiding my thoughts now. I finally decided, exhaling gently.
" Why, out of all the people in that ballroom, you saved me? Why not protect Ciel? Your contract? "
As the words i hated to speak formed I felt them fall to my feet like spilling a glass of expensive wine. He seemed to have picked up on my uneasiness, because I heard his usual ' Hmmm~' behind me. Damped cloth still in my hands, I turned to face him.
He had his black hair messed up all about the soft white pillow, and his usually deep, pooled crimson eyes seemed more softened now. He beckoned me closer to him, seeing as he couldn't move much. " Yes? " I quietly ask, the sudden realization that he could easily die plagueing my thoughts.
He reaches over and grasps my hand gently. For the first time ever, it is without his gloves. Although his hands are cold from what he truly was, I could imagine the warmth that would replace them. " Y/N... " He started quietly, staring at the ceiling. He turned his head to face me, with a hiss of pain, but after a few long seconds he recovered." I saved you because, well, you mean something to me. " He replied in a hushed tone. " The Young Lord, well, he is my contract, yes, but he doesn't make me wish for his safety. He doesn't make me wonder how someone so magnetic exists. He doesn't make me feel this, strange way of at-ease, possessiveness, gratefulness, and... " Sebastian seems lost for words, as if trying to pull the correct word out of the cloudy haze that must've been his mind at that moment. He groans, as the head injury must had not recovered fully yet.
" Shhh... " I whisper, placing my hand on his forehead carefully. His forehead was throbbing, a sign of violent headache. Quickly I return to my station and get another cloth, returning to place it on his forehead.
" What is this that I do feel? " He asks me, after silence hung between us like a humid summer day.
" My guess would be, well, love. "
"... Then that'd what i'd describe my thoughts to you. Intoxicated with this- love. "
I couldn't help but chuckle at the way his last word escaped from his lips. It was much like throns escaped his lips instead, like they had cut his throat inside out.
I turn on my heel to face my demon butler.
I hum
" Is that so wrong?~ "