Another Stupid Spell

By billricardi

1K 105 27

Another Stupid Spell is a first person high fantasy novel, the likes of which hasn't been seen in 60 years. T... More

Introduction
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
End of Book 1

Chapter 3

55 4 2
By billricardi

Plan done, been done for days. Make some trips to spot outside cave, set up plan. Shaman come one time when Chief away, help with big part. He look awful next morning... Shaman really need beauty sleep. Also I make sure sneak off plan working. Tomorrow full moon, short work day for Kenvunk praying. Start magic late in morning, end magic before dark. If late, chief not get wise. If dead he get wise, but I no care then.

Shaman let me sleep after work, wake me on night guard change. He still argue that he need to come, but if he late for Kenvunk praying, plan ruined. Taking Lizzy though, that part of plan. Gonna be three hour hard hike. Lizzy good night eyes, help me move quick, help me dodge wild stuff and things.

Walk into hills never simple. First dodge orc patrols. Not just our tribe, all tribe. See many Fistuntuls with blue war paint and long spear. They loud, easy to hide. Deep into hills, see lone Nightbane orc. And she see us. She move hammer hand to hand, but then walk on. Is good, want no part of hammer-maiden, bad news there.

As move away from muck, trees change. Look less healthy. Everything more dry, branches thin, leaf rubbery or baked. Sap thick, like old blood. Less moss, less grass. Whole middle of hike feel dead. Up and down hills, not matter. Like forest just give up. Not used to be like this, not when young. This part just as green as near muck, many seasons past. Not now.

Last hour walk pretty quiet. Start get more green toward mountain river. Hear more chirp, more click, more alive. Raise mood some. Lizzy not being mean, mostly. Even caught small rat. We split rat.

Get to camp outside one of caves that goes to Silverfish lair. Is next to river. River flow down hillside, between rock and dirt. Remember when young, go way high in hill. River start with many tiny stream. Then all stream meet near warm spring, and all water gush together. River not as big as seasons back, but still big. That mean cave will be wet, Silverfish like wet.

Camp pretty big. Tree all over outside. High part cover with dirt. Slope down to low part, all bare rock. Flat rock on ground from stone wall near river, to opening for cave. Lizzy perch on stone wall by river, grooming. I get wood, left last time visit. Still dry... doesn't rain much now. Use rock and metal, start fire on dirt way off to side of camp, on high side. Build fire is OK here, beasts no hunt near Silverfish, and Silverfish no like fire.

Go over things, in case bad stuff happen. Three cave can go to Silverfish lair; this smallest, tightest. Basher in armor or Silverfish barely fit through thin bit. Take no metal, Silverfish smell metal good. I strip off most gear, not gonna need much. Keep Rock though. Rock important.

Go over escape plan. Camp pretty safe, but chance Silverfish chase anyways if I screw up and it angry. It always angry. Orc tribe close to here say it hunt for sport. Find dead... parts spread all over. No reason. Never see in day though. So if it chase, get close to fire as can. Leave two bigger branch hang out of fire. Good for burney bashing.

I mutter plan to self, over and over. See Lizzy staring, like I crazy. I snarl. Lizzy snarl back. I sigh.

Time to go.

Loop long rope around thick tree. Tie off. Run rope end into cave, twenty pace, leave as guide. Realize how much of plan just use rope and string... scarey thought. Tie piece of long string around pinky. Lizzy fly over, let me tie string to tail. Start to think Lizzy know plan better than me.

Lizzy fly in cave, I follow. First forty pace, can stand. Then for ten step gotta duck. Then all crawl. Real dark inside, not even moonlight. Lizzy signal me if Silverfish in, or out for hunt. Long time waiting. What if Lizzy get ate? Shaman _kill_ me if Lizzy get ate. Not hear nothing. Start to wonder if this all long joke from Shaman. If so, real good one.

Feel sharp tug on finger. Two. Silverfish is in. Slow and quiet, I crawl in. At tight point, feel clothes scrape cold wall. Feel pouch press into belly. Never like small place. Never like dark place. What I doing here? Plan dumb. Shaman dumb. I dumb to listen. Feel string tug again. Dumb flying lizard.

Cave open back up again, enough to stand. So slowly. So quiet. Small tugs on clothes. Bitey flying lizard line me up. Then feel string flutter when Lizzy bite through. Lizard fly out now, job done. Wind string up and put in pouch. Feel inside... Rock still there. Somehow, feel better now.

Know what gotta do. Would be dumb stand there and wait for Silverfish to find. But I just think how dumb I gotta be, so... no, no. Plan is best plan. Shaman say so.

Is time.

I hold hands high in front, way up in air, like announcing important thing to tribe. Not just say magic words, _scream_ magic words. Silverfish about to know where orc is anyway. Maybe scare it some. It never hear smart orc with magic. Not many have.

Feel the drain, make sure plan still in head when brain shrink. It is. The lair fill with light, like noon sun right inside. Can see now, lair is fifty paces deep, twenty paces wide, two orc tall. Smell like death. Everything glitter, wet or metal. Silverfish almost look like glowing, while it scream. Sound like ape mix with demon get squeezed to death.

If I was as smart as at start of night, might not have stared at it for so long. But first spell like first drink: Make you dumb enough to go do dumb thing, and dumb enough to drink more.

Silverfish like nightmares. Tall like child orc. Long like two orc. Eight legs got big claws. Head got two antenna, look like whips. So does butt, with huge stinger too. Body like bug, plated silver. Crouching away from fake sun. It hate sun. I throw Rock at it. Not even hit, but it hate me even more than sun. It scream again, make spine feel like cracked glass.

Time to run.

I dive back into tiny cave. At least light from behind now. Light go away when squeeze through tiny part. Hear Silverfish right behind. Feel it right behind. For second, think I'm stuck. If stuck, I dead. Pull hard with arms and push with legs... make it through.

Claw at ground to try get away. Don't want hear scream, cause each one louder, closer. Crawl forward enough to turn and sit up. No light from lair, huge body blocking. Just firelight behind me. As Silverfish squeeze through tiny bit, I yell, "Lizzy!"

Now two thing happen at same time.

One thing, I use other spell. Fire from camp let me aim. Bolt like wild horse fly from hand. Miss Silverfish, it charging too quick. Is OK. Silverfish not where aim. Big pile of rocks in nets near roof held up by wood, now behind Silverfish. Hit wood part real hard. Rocks in nets fall, roll back. Block tightest part of cave just when Silverfish through.

Other thing happen, Lizzy finish chew through vines.

If one thing smart orc know, smart orc know rocks. Shaman know water. Help carve out spot on river bank. Little rock wall where me and Shaman dig behind, so mostly little rock wall and some lizard hide holding back water. Patch with moss and stuff and things. Then we haul up real heavy bit.

Lizzy-vine hold big-big rock in tall tree. Big-big rock fall now, smash little rock wall near river. Little rock wall we build before now just pile of nothing.

Much of river now charging into little cave.

Grab guide rope just in time. Water crash over me, crash over Silverfish just behind. Hold onto rope so hard, palms bleed. Rocks in nets mostly clogging back of cave now. If let go of guide rope, get pinned and drown. Gotta hold on til more water, til easier to climb out.

Silverfish no have rope, but strong. It fight against new river smashing it down. It lunge at me and I feel it. A big claw rake right side, that hurt. Second claw dig into left shin though, and body feel like on fire. Feel claw on bone. Want to scream, but need keep air, or die. Only good part is, two less claw on slippy rock make Silverfish slide back. Too much water, too much pressure. Hear one last demon scream before ears cover with water.

Probably dying now. But after spells, too dumb to know for sure. Feel arms working, pulling broken orc body out of flood cave. Fight pressure, fight new river. Follow guide rope as leg go numb, as chest burns, as shoulders scream. Body going to give up and try to breathe like fish. But next pull on rope make head find air. Gasp it in. Keep pulling on rope until dragged up to camp. Collapse by fire.

If Silverfish live, should burst out of water-full cave soon. But never happen. Even insect need breathe, so say Shaman. Silverfish is drowned, helping clog little hole with our rocks and nets now. In end, magic ambush, traps, and lotsa water did what whole tribes not do.

Not bad for dying smart orc.

Something in head still work. Know it will hurt, but grab one of burny bashing sticks from fire. Press against left leg. Scream. Wet pants steam, broken flesh burn. But blood stop. Can't see bone now. Throw stick back in fire. Go into bags, find Shaman's moss and bandages. Put most moss on leg, wrap tight. Put little moss on side and wrap up chest. Use rest of bandages to wrap bleeding hands. Then wait minute to see if gonna die.

Nope.

River now all backed up, flowing over entire rock part of camp. Water circle, then spill back into main river between two trees. Not much of stone part show now. But dirt part of camp now have good riverside view.

Lizzy land on wrist. Look smug for flying lizard. Did good job though, so give special treat that Shaman packed. Bone marrow from giant rat. Doesn't take Lizzy long to finish. Then we go 'round hill, to bigger cave. Me grab mostly empty sack. Grab other burney branch, daylight spell done by now. Limping bad, but moss help with some pain. If make back to tribe, not going to get any sleep before rituals. If not make back to tribe... screw rituals. Kenvunk gotta keep smart orc living if he want any thanks.

Bigger cave not as steep or narrow anywhere. Can walk right down to lair. Flooded parts, but not bad. Even with rocks and nets and Silverfish body, some water still getting into lair. Good though, wash away some of bad smell. Grab Rock first, most important. Then reach into puddles and gather all silver pieces. Throw in sack. There more metal, but all rusted. Lose count after hundred silvers. But at least that much more again. A couple of silver rings and chains, take them too. 7 silvers look very strange. Weird face on them, weird color. Put them in pouch for later.

Go back to camp, gather things, put out fire. Lizzy going to have to navigate. Too much pain. Must concentrate on where feet go, one slip and smart orc might not get back up. Lizzy always tugging on clothes, steering orc here and there. She probably save me ten times, can't really know. Not smart now. Not well either. Life is Lizzy's now.

Flying lizard true friend though, Shaman raise her good. If she ever has clutch of eggs, would love to raise baby Lizzy for own.

Was past dawn when make back to tribe. Problem. Guards all around before ceremony. Blood on me, blood in black hair, they see if I go. I stop, crouched behind big rock. Lizzy look confused, then sees what I looking at. Flying lizard go over to guard and hisses. He look annoyed. But look much more annoyed when Lizzy steal his feathered headpiece. As she fly away with it, guards hoot and holler and chase. Let me limp into camp and into Shaman's tent.

Get yelled at by Shaman for getting hurt. Lots of yelling. But can tell he happy to see me. He call on Kenvunk to start healing wounds, and soon feel much better. Still ache like worst beating ever, but not going to die. Shaman say will take another day of Kenvunk healing for leg, but hands feel better and shoulder more OK now.

Shaman fill tent with smoke again, make sure I not cursed, nothing I grab cursed. Only amulet glow. He peers at every coin and chain and ring, make sure they safe. Lizzy come back, without stolen headpiece. She stare at all the shinies.

Shaman say, "You do good. You do real good. Kenvunk proud, I proud. Lizzy proud too."

I grunt. "You take stuff and hide. When chief see me, think I'm done for. Get food for village."

Shaman wave hand in air. "No, no. I got good plan for that. Smart plan. I show you soon, you'll see."

I must not look like I believe, 'cause he scowl at me. I change subject. "Half this yours anyways. Take it, use to barter for food and stuff and things."

Shaman shake head. "All silver coins yours, was point of this. If you force me, I take these rings and chains. Can trade for much food, will really help tribe."

I nod, slowly. No point in argue with friend. Point at seven metal chunks with ugly face. "You take special coins though. Don't know what is anyway."

He lift one up to show. "These electrum. Part silver, part gold. Think from desert tribe somewhere. You keep, may need later."

My turn to be hard head. "You keep. If part gold, could help huge next season!"

He sigh. "Three for village, four for you. No argue now. We hide this stuff in chest, and get you ready for ceremony."

Shaman have dumb plan.

OK, not dumb plan. But make me feel dumb. I dress in weird lizard skin robe, act as assistant. Ceremony always have people move slow, so nobody really notice how hurt I be. No need to cast more magic, cuz I sitting by Shaman all day and night. Sometimes I use fan on him, or hand stuff and things from table, or fill cup, or hold book. Even quiet times where catch quick sleeps. Mostly, nobody see how hurt I be.

After ceremony, we figure when try new smartening spell. Two days, after Shaman's healing done on leg, after I sleep some. He get quiet invisible hands to cut up some silver too, so none wasted. Soon we see if this worth time.

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