I had given birth to the boys at one in the morning at 34 and a half weeks. To say that was the most scariest moment of my life was quite an understatement, Joel was in Ottawa playing a game so thankful he wasn't to far away and thankfully both of our moms had gone to visit and even watch the game with me. Tessa had called Joel an hour before the game started and he was heading home immediately, he wasn't late for the C section thankfully because I don't know what I'd do without him being there.
Apparently from what I heard was that everyone had came down immediately and waited in the hospital waiting for Joel to come out and announce that everything was okay but after the C section Bennett had ended up having a collapsed lung which was scary because they had to collect a tube to his chest. At around 8 am they had moved us into a hospital room and everyone slowly trailed in aweing at the boys, it was late afternoon when everyone had left the hospital and the only people left in the hospital room with me was me, Joel and our mom's.
Joel was currently sitting on the couch with Simon in his lap as I perched over from the hospital bed over to Bennett because he was put on a ventilator at the moment, we were scheduled to stay over at the hospital for at least the rest of the week just for good measure.
I stroke Bennett's cheek slowly, in the corner of my eye I could see Mom take a seat beside Joel "they are truly beautiful"She smiles down at Simon. I hum.
Tessa and mom announce that their going to go and grab something to eat for all of us and will be back. Joel slowly stands up and begins to rock back and forth with Simon in his arms. If I could take a picture I would but I couldn't at the moment so I'd have to rely on my memories for this moment "how are you doing?" He asks me quietly, after the c section I was experiencing some stomach pains.
"I'm okay"I nod "still hurts a little but I'll be fine"I say and lean my chin on the plastic wall thing of where Bennett was laying down on.
"You should sleep"Joel says to me.
"I feel like I won't be able to sleep until I know he's okay"I sigh
"Chloe, you need sleep babe"Joel says as he slowly walks over to the other crib like thing and places Simon in it.
I shake my head "I'm fine"
"chloe, you literally just like gave birth, at least take like a power nap" I sigh and he leans over and kisses my forehead. "Please for me?" I nod slowly and Joel helps me lay back down. Sleep came to me in seconds.
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📍Toronto General Hospital
chloelane Introducing Bennett Carter Lane and Simon Leo Lane. After an early pregnancy, a C section and a scare with Bennett, We are all perfectly fine and enjoying our new baby boys.
tagged joellane
📍Lane Apartment
joellane The bubs are finally home and we couldn't be more happier.
tagged chloelane
"It's so weird bringing home small infants home isn't it?" I whisper, after coming home and getting the boys changed and dressed in their rooms and brought them back to ours so I could feed them. I had fed both of them and they were currently laying asleep in between Joel and I. Him and I laying at the edges of the bed watching them.
"It is. It's so weird. Like I'm a dad" I chuckle softly.
"You almost swore didn't you?" He nods with a smile. I roll my eyes.
"This is gonna be so hard, the whole not swearing thing especially with all the guys that come around" he tells me. Suddenly a tapping noise comes from the window and I slowly turn my head to see that it's raining, again. It had been raining all day but we didn't let the weather get us all down because today was the day we'd be bring our boys home. It was easy at the hospital, taking care of them but now that we're home the two of us are on our own. And hell raising one kid at the age of 22 is hard enough then imagine two kids at 22, this was definitely something we were not expecting. We had a route set out mostly for me and my work. Jane would drop by every morning before she headed to the clinic to hand me the paper work that I'd do at home and she and one of our other employees would do all the physical work. Which kind of us considering I'd love to do all the hands on stuff as well but Joel and Jane were not having it, saying that working from home and being with the boys is good enough.
Jane and I had also talked about hiring a few more hands after the summer break or before summer ends just in case it gets more busy and I'm still being forced to work at home.
"So shall I make dinner or order?" Joel asks grabbing my attention again.
"We should really start to cook home meals shouldn't we?" I ask him. He nods. The two of us had grown up with home meals and we obviously wanted our kids to be raised somewhat the same, but ever since we got together and married it turned out to be more of the order and delivery years but we made the decision to make home cooked meals for our kids unless we most certainly could not do it.
"I'll make pasta, it's super easy" I roll my eyes and he chuckles.
"I should really teach you how to cook, or your boys will end up learning before you"I coe as I place my hand on Bennett's stomach rubbing his small belly.
"Oh I'd love to see that happen, may I remind you I've gotten pretty good at mommy's breakfast burritos"I roll my eyes.
"You still haven't hit the perfection but your getting there"
"As long as I know how to make them our kids will be fine in life"
The first night is always hard, that's what everyone says. And it was true, it was either one of the boys would have to get changed or get fed and it was either my other boy Joel who'd be getting out of bed constantly just to check on them.
"Wow"Lucie whistles as I come into the kitchen at around ten am. "I mean aren't you glowing beautifully"she smiles, I roll my eyes at her.
"Don't even start Lu" I sigh, she closes her laptop and turns to me.
"They really do say the first night is rough"She mumbles.
"I think this is the first time that all three boys are asleep"
"Three?"my sister questions.
"Joel was constantly getting up and checking on them, I don't know if it's a panic attack thing and doesn't want it to happen while the boys are asleep beside me or like he just couldn't sleep" Lucie stares at me and sighs "what?"
"He told me not to tell you but your my sister"
"Lucie"
"Your right on the panic attack thing but he's afraid if he falls asleep or your both asleep that Bennett will stop breathing or something"I sigh and lean on the counter.
"He could've told me"
"He didn't want to worry you" she tells me. I sigh again.
"Thanks"
"Don't tell him I snaked you"I chuckle.
"I promise I won't" I nod "aren't you suppose to be at school?"
"I have Friday's off remember? So I thought I'd come visit and help you guys for a while"
"I appreciate it, thanks"
"Is there anything I could do?"
"At the moment, no"
"Well then I'll continue making notes and doing homework until you do"
"Wanna do that on the couch? Maybe if we watch tv I'll end up falling asleep"
"If that's all you need me for" she says and stands up grabbing her things.
"It is, because I'd be spending time with you" I smile back at her and she rolls her eyes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Joel and I had gotten use to the routine of two twin boys but sometimes the nights were still just as hard but that was expected, I had noticed that Joel became less worried about Bennett but sometimes I'd catch him making sure he's still breathing, I honestly can't blame him.
The hard part about new born twins was that they were born right as hockey season was just taking off and that was worse because as much as Joel wanted to be at home with me, helping me he had to go do his job, I often had Sam, Kalani or steph stop by. Mostly Kalani though.
I enjoyed the extra hands when they came along just because I'd honestly lose my mind if I were alone, the nights were brutal but I've been learning and have been managing. Even thought Joel would get home late when the boys cried he'd be the first one up, cradling either one.
"I don't know I feel about our first road trip"Joel says nervous from the kitchen.
"Joel"
"I just don't want to leave you for that long that's all"he sighs.
"I'll be fine"
"Maybe I should call someone like Lucy, she'll be up in seconds"
"Don't you dare call Lucy, I'll be fine. Our moms are a call away and plus Kalani practically comes everyday anyways" I tell him, the boys were in their swing thing.
"Maybe Christina? Their due for another visit"
"Joel"I laugh and he sighs, I look back to see him walking towards me.
"I'm sorry I'm just a bit scared" he says and leans on the wall behind the boys swing from none other then Christina.
"I'll be okay"I look up at him as I swing the swing back and forth slowly. "Plus if you don't go then you'll never go on another road trip ever again" I comment.
"Your always right"he sighs, I shrug.
"Now go before I make you late, you've got a plane to catch" I tell him. He nods and leans down, pressing his lips to mine. He then gives the boys a gentle kiss on their foreheads and I watch him grab his bags and exit the door with a wave to me. I smile as he closes the door behind him, I look back down at the boys in front of me and sigh "and there goes daddy always on the go"I smile.
📍Lane Apartment
chloelane This is gonna be the first couple weeks I'm handling the boys on my own but down worry we'll be watching daddy on the screen. Also thank you so much Christina for this amazing swing set, the boys love it!!!
tagged christina.marleau joellane
kalanileblanc Can't Wait to spend two weeks with those boys!!!!
stephlachancee I'm coming over!!! Aunty Steph is coming soon!!
alexanderfisher their really living for that swing.
benpatrick Awwww.
auston_matthews surprise us with them already skating when we get back?
williamnylander their like 4 weeks old stupid
marner_93 never to early to start training.
joellane They are adorable😭😭😭 I'll be back soon, with wins.
luciefisher I wish I could come over but my edumcation is apparently more important, words from mom.
unknown28 edumcation😂😂
unknown96 CUTE!!!!!
travisdermott my brothers💙
katdilucia I'm coming over too!! How can you not?!? Their adorable!!
~~~~~~~~~~~
I'd be lying if I said the first night without Joel was shit, kalani had promised that she would stay the nights on the couch. That's true friendship. She was at work right now and Sam was sitting on the floor cradling Simon as Bennett lay on his back beside her.
I was getting some paperwork done seeing as I was a bit behind on some "You look super tired Chlo, if you'd like I could watch them while you take a nap" Sam says.
"I'm fine"
"It wasn't much of a suggestion I'm demanding you go because you look like shit and Joel would never let me hear the end of it if I knew you didn't even sleep last night and didn't get sleep during the day. I've taken care of babies trust me. I'll watch them and I'll wake you up before the game and everyone will be here"she gives me a smile and I sigh, looking between her and my paperwork.
"I'll just finish this, I'm almost done" she nods. The boys were playing a game tonight and of course everyone wanted to come over and see the twins so I agreed to only a few, Sam, steph, Kalani, and Katerina.
Overall the first few days without Joel hadn't been too bad because a lot of people had came around to help, I was great full for them and how caring they all were. I honestly don't know where I'd be without them.