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Cursing- Read at your own disposition
August 18, 2019
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C O U R T R O O M
M U D D L E D F R O M R E A L I T Y, any noise or light chit chat that lingered adrift to what I made myself think was my reality—just paused. I was surrounded by a defining silence, the courtroom made my blood as cold as the autumnal air that crept through an open window. Bereft of any wind, the leaves outside hung limp until they fell of their own accord, It was as if nature conspired to keep me in the dark, not daring to whisper the reassurance I ever so dearly craved. Then hurried footsteps and the squeak of a door brought my heart racing as fast as a gunshot, My head snapped in an instant from gazing out of the window with unfocused eyes to the rectangle of white Formica— the Clerk arrived hands behind his back and nose held high.
"Order in the court." his voice boomed reminding us all why we were actually here.
" The honorable Mister justice, Gerald Findgens Presiding. All rise. Department One of the Superior Court is now in session. " looking over at the door he had just arrived through ten seconds prior, now stood an old man with incredible posture as he walked towards his high chair at the stand my eyes scanned his every movement even down to the twitch of his left hand,
This was bad actually this just might be worse than not being able to go to that one Hannah Montana concert when I was ten, she never again toured after that and I was a small-town girl in the middle of butt fuck America so it wasn't like I was about to show up at south cal only for a three hour show, but oddly enough it hadn't been despair nor, the need to cry when I found out I couldn't go It's not predictable anger or pain. it's the "randoms," stuff you know it's coming, just never when. The randoms work on the mind as torture, elevating primal fear, decreasing logic and self-control, and the day of the concert when the snobby rich girls from my school had gone I completely lost my shit I even had the audacity to break my mom's favorite vase
'sorry mom' this took me back to that time, painfully stupid comparison but I couldn't forget that feeling of unknown hurt because in reality— I lived my life not knowing what was going on half of the time and in that specific moment, yes the feeling of not being there at the stupid concert, had the world crashing onto my shoulders, and this moment the weight of the world and everyone's emotions were on my shoulders just like that day. That emotion just sucked being at a loss for what to feel, I mean I wanted to say,
more like scream into existence that I felt innocent but in practicality, being innocent was two strangely different things, because I know what happened and like in every situation there's three stories 'Yours, Mines, and the Truth' but his couldn't be told not anymore that is 'Awkward'.
"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. Calling the case of Michelle Salvador versus Aaron Mathews. Are both sides ready?" the clerk once again interrupted my thoughts he cleared his throat one last time before he turned to the judge and gave him an all-clear to start with the case.
My heart lurched into my gut this was it, after all, that I had been through being, captive and now going to be put away for murdering the man that caused my turmoil, you know they say "There is nothing to fear but fear itself," yet in our world that isn't true. Many things are worse than fear. The truth, for me, in those words are a warning that fear can change who we are inside, make us compromise where we should stand firm. Is our love for one another only in our "anthems" or do we mean it? Would we feed the hungry? Would we home the homeless? If not, why not? What do we fear that keeps us from being the angels of our better natures? Who puts that fear in our hearts and minds?" oh I know what the fear in my mind is, the fact that I murdered someone, doesn't that ring a couple of bells.
"Ready for Aaron Mathews, your honor" the district attorney spoke
"Ready for the defendant, your honor" my lawyer Linda Carson stated, looking down at me with sympathetic eyes
"It's going to be all okay" she mouthed giving me a comforting smile, i gulped knowing all wouldn't be okay this was long overdue I barely had been reunited with my family for a week until I was scouted out and arrested at my home for murder and now here I was attending my trail.
My heart in my hands. My whole family was in the courtroom even my outrageously annoying four-year-old cousin, they were there on my side praying that I was only given parole or a half house sentence.
"Will the clerk please swear in the jury" the judge announced
'There was no going back now' this was it, I had the chance to flee, My Uncle had offered me a first-class ticket to Mexico with the rest of my family, we would reside there and let the problem wither away. But no my guilt was eating me alive and the therapy seasons offered by the government were horrible it got to the point where if I didn't want anyone to suffer with me, I would have just killed myself and trust me the thought played vividly over and over again.
"Both parties please stand up, Do you Michelle Salvador swear that you will fairly try the case before this court and that you will return a true verdict according to the evidence and the instructions of the court, so help you, God? Please say 'I do' ".
"I do" my voice cracked, the lack of human contact in the past three days caused my vocals cords to burn in revelation, with the utmost respect I bowed my head trying not to keep eye contact with any of the men in the courtroom, they all just looked at me as I was a monster I felt like they just didn't understand me as if I was a pesk they couldn't wait to get rid of, unfortunately going into this I swore to only say the truth and accept this fatality because anything at this point was a win anything-except-life-was-a-win.
"Members of the jury, Michelle Salvador has been charged in one count information with the crime of murder in violation of penal code 1-8-7. The information alleges that on or about June 25, 2014, in Vernal, Utah, The defendant Michelle Salvador did Kill Aaron Mathews, In violation of penal code 1-8-7. to this charge, Mrs. Salvador has entered a plea of not guilty ." The clerk stated walking off of the courtroom floor to his seat in the left corner.
'fuck that sure as hell sounded rough'
"Alright shall we commence, District attorney you may call your first witness" the judge instructed
my gut wrenched as I watched a supermodel-esk women walk over to the stand her hands holding tissues and a tear-stained face.
"Mrs. Mathews could you please state who you are and your words for the judge." The attorney insisted voice steady and collected, unlike the women she looked and I mean this in-the-nicest-way-possible as if she had just been run over by a car If it was a better day I assure she could carry herself nicely but she was in shambles.
"I'm Cathrine Mathews," sniffles followed after, would it be rude to say she looked as if she was faking it... "my son Aaron Mathews was murdered at the hands of that women" she spewed
"My son was a great boy he had amazing grades his father and I were so proud of him because even though he had Autism and Down Syndrome, he scored best in his class all of high school." She cried balling up her fists.
"Your honor I would like to add that Aaron was under heavy medication for his problems." The attorney added giving the grieving mother at the stand a sympathetic smile
" let me see them" the judge announced, the attorney handed the pale yellow folder to the officer and was handed the files
" Was any of these medications found in his system in the autopsy " the judge questioned
"Uh, No your honor, and that's why he had acted so impulsively and captured Mrs.Salvador" The attorney defended
He didn't seem to have so many loose cords, Hell he looked perfectly healthy especially when he wanted to shove his dick in me, Though he was strange and the things he did were monstrous but both Down syndrome and autism, really.
'This was making my case look worse' i looked over at my lawyer with wide eyes
" did you know about this" I whispered
"It's the first time I hear about it" she whispered back keeping up her perfect poker face.
I looked down at my hands 'Baby blue, so Innocent' my mothers voice drifted into the back of my head and I couldn't help myself but turn my body and look at her she seemed so far yet so close as if I could just stretch my hands towards her and caress those flushed cheeks all the while wiping away the tears that fell rapidly off of her beautiful face. my eyes lingered a bit on her before they traveled over my fathers stoic expression, he was always rough and insanely strict, when his mom died he merely nodded his head in acknowledgment and not even two weeks later his father passed and he didn't even bat an eyelash, maybe he just didn't love me nor anyone at that, maybe just my mother he alwasy had a soft spot for her, must be nice to have a high school sweetheart, something I know I wasn't going to be gifted with, and from my father my eyes landed onto my siblings Wilson and Peter,
I was the youngest and had two older brothers 'unfortunately', and they were my two-man army when I had got home that night after everything had occurred, they wanted to look for Arron and murder him, disastrously enough, I had beat them to that task on my own. It was odd Wilson the middle child was an extremely emotional person yet he hadn't shed a tear and Peter someone so similar to my father not only in looks but mainly in emotions had his face shoved into the palms of his hands.
starring at them made me relish in all the good times but sadden me simultaneously, it almost made me feel in some strange way I had disappointed all them from my maternal family to everyone else, I scanned over them, My aunt Lucile crying into uncle jacks shoulder didn't go unseen, one day ill apologize to her for making her cry, and
my eyes traveled down the row of people on my side all familiar faces except for one person in the back, he was as suspicious as three kids trying to sneak into a movie theater with a dark brown trench coat and matching hat all I could distinguish was the smirk on his pink lips, had he noticed I saw him?
"Hey, pay attention" Linda muttered taping my shoulder lightly, but I couldn't stop thinking about the man in the back.
" Attorney Mayor, what is your proposal, I'm seeing a lot of wholes in your arguments" he mumbled starring at the yellow folders
" Well your Honor, Aaron Mathews was a child with problems and without his medication he was not himself, h-"
"Excuse me Attorney Mayor for interrupting you but, Mrs.Mathews didn't you notice something odd when your son wouldn't be home for long periods of time or possibly acting strange, without his medication"
" I-i I'm busy all the time, and he always behaved so well so as a gift for graduating from high-school my husband and I bought him a Minnie condo and he lived his life there, I'd visit every so often." She muttered closing her eyes and balling her fists.
"If that's so how many times did you visit him from May 9th of 2014 to June 25th of 2014 the day your son had died." The judge asked calmly
"Z-zero" she whispered bursting into tears
"Alright well that settles that," the judge said with disgust in his tone his eyes peered at the attorney
"Anything else to say?" He questioned
" Yes your honor, evidence shows from the autopsy report that Mrs.Salvador," he said rumedging through papers on the desk." I quote, stabbed his anterior Thigh, making him immobile, then striking him with a PS4 gaming console thrice killing him with the first blow but continued to disfigure the child not allowing this grieving family an open casket. with that I conclude my argument and would like to proceed with a plea Judge Findgens" he said proudly.
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Hey it's your awkward author here, I know I know I did a very poor job at portraying a court trial but its a lot harder when you have all this information and dont want to make it boring because I know all of you are here for the smut and sexy-ness that WILL come I promise you that!