Even after their meal silence reigned over Tracou and Pendaer. Making sure Pendaer had food to eat and a place to sleep had been relatively simple, but if he was going to amble away from him with no notice then Tracou was going to have to reevaluate how much effort he was putting into this. Pendaer was an adult, albeit one that was out of his element. Maybe he should let Pendaer do as he pleased. He might run into trouble, but that clearly didn't bother him as much as it bothered Tracou.
Pendaer was quiet, but he was jittery. Every so often, he would peek at Tracou and hurriedly adjust his gaze away from him if it seemed that he was going to notice. Doing that enough would alert anyone to it, though, so eventually Tracou openly stared at him.
When their eyes met, Pendaer winced.
"Tracou... Are you angry?"
Tracou sniffed. "I'm certainly not happy with you."
"Oh..." The elf deflated. "What do I do?"
"What do you mean?"
"To make you not angry. I'm not used to people being angry at me."
"No?" Tracou raised an eyebrow. "Is that an elf thing? Not getting angry, I mean."
"That's part of it."
Instead of offering more information, Pendaer appeared to be finished. Annoying. That left Tracou as the one to steer the conversation.
"If you don't want me to be angry, then tell me that if you see that other elf again that you'll tell me you're leaving."
"That's all?"
"Well, you could do more, but I'll accept that."
Pendaer nodded, a small smile on his face. "Okay."
"You know... if you'd rather we don't have to be together all the time. We can share a bed, but otherwise you can do what you want. "
"No."
The speed of Pendaer's response left Tracou unsure if he had heard him correctly. He eyed Pendaer, frowning.
"No?"
"No. I like you and I don't want to be alone anymore. Ah, that reminds me! I saw something earlier. I want to show you—will you come with me?"
"What is it?"
But Pendaer was already standing up. He held out a hand to Tracou, who considered taking it, but ultimately refused it and stood up by himself.
"You'll see when we get there."
"Is it far? I'm tired, Pendaer. I did more running around today than I normally do in months."
"It's not that far..." Pendaer looked Tracou over, considering something. He soon came to a conclusion. "I can carry you."
Tracou clicked his tongue. "I can walk."
As it turned out, not that far for Pendaer was a distance longer than Tracou would have agreed to had he known the exact measurement. Tracou was just about to launch into a series of complaints when Pendaer gestured toward the destination.
It was a big, empty field. Or so it seemed at first. On this field were some circular targets standing on one edge and a woman arranging a selection of bows and arrows on the other.
"Archery?" Tracou asked.
"I'm good at it. Will you watch me?"
Watching Pendaer practice archery wasn't Tracou's idea of a good time, but they were already here. It was well into the afternoon. Even if he wanted to, walking all the way back to the market and going through it would be too much for him. At least he could stay in place while Pendaer did his thing.
"All right."
"Good." Pendaer was so pleased that he was bouncing on his heels. "I'll be sure to impress you."
That comment made the corner of Tracou's lip pull upward. Was this part of Pendaer's effort to make sure Tracou wasn't mad? It was a bit odd, but it was working.
They spoke with the woman, who told them they could rent a bow and a few arrows to use. Tracou paid, naturally. She also said that they had missed a competition that morning, which brought Pendaer down some. He had only seen this place after that, when it had been turned into a practice range. Luckily, once he had a bow in his hand he seemed to forget all about that lost opportunity.
"Watch," he said, eyes glittering.
So Tracou watched. He stood a few feet from Pendaer and kept his eyes on him as he pulled back the bowstring and prepared to shoot. Clearly used to this, Pendaer's adopted the pose with ease. But something was off. He lowered the bow, frowning, and held it and the arrow out to Tracou.
"Could you hold these for a second?"
Tracou did so.
With his hands free, Pendaer shrugged out of his robe. He was wearing another set of clothes underneath it. A robe seemed bad enough in the summer heat and yet he was wearing more clothes! His underclothes were plain, but they showed the shape of his body far better than the robe did. His body was solid. Pendaer seemed a lot more dependable like this than he had with the robe on.
After dropping the robe on the ground, Pendaer rolled up his sleeves. He held his hand out to Tracou, who gave him back the bow and arrow.
The elf's eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he pulled back the bowstring. He stood tall, taller than any dezmek or human could hope to be. The blue sky behind him framed him perfectly. Strands of his soft blond hair moved lazily with the breeze, but they went unnoticed by Pendaer. There was room for only one thing for Pendaer as long as he had a bow in his hand.
Compared to Pendaer's generally placid or pleasant expressions, this was a serious change. It was intense. Focused. Powerful. Handsome. If Pendaer turned that gaze on Tracou, he would be reduced to a stuttering, sweaty mess.
No. No! He couldn't go and start finding Pendaer attractive—the last time he had been interested in a man it had resulted in laughter from one party and tears from the other. Back then he had been certain those tears would flood his village.
Before Pendaer let go of the string, he glanced at Tracou. The look made Tracou's heart spring around his chest in at least three different types of terror.
"Don't look at me," he chided. "Look at the target."
Tracou rigidly turned his entire body to face the target. A beat after he had, Pendaer let the arrow loose. It whistled through the air and hit the middle of the target with a mighty thwack.
"See? I'm good at this."
"I didn't doubt you before."
Tracou's eyes were locked onto the target, which didn't escape Pendaer's notice. He stepped in front of Tracou, forcing him to look at him.
"Do you want to try?"
"No," Tracou said without the least bit of hesitation. He was keeping his eyes trained on Pendaer's clavicle, which was visible without the robe. Hopefully this was just a fluke. He had gone so long without feeling anything—why now? Everything was fine earlier! He had just been mad at him!
"Aw, come on, just once? I'll help you."
Tracou pouted. "You'll make fun of me."
"I won't, I promise I won't. Okay?"
This was a bad idea. He was leaving himself open to all kinds of teasing, but Pendaer already seemed wounded that Tracou didn't want to do this. Against his better judgment, Tracou found himself unwilling to disappoint Pendaer.
"Fine, fine."
Beaming, Pendaer handed Tracou the bow and settled behind him.
"First, I'll show you how to hold it..."
There was a pause. Then Pendaer bent his knees, trying to lower himself to Tracou's level. The fact that he had to do that was embarrassing for Tracou, who was already embarrassed enough. He turned to see behind him, only to find that Pendaer's face was hovering right over his shoulder. The unexpected sight made Tracou yelp and snap his head forward again.
This wasn't just a bad idea—it was the worst idea anyone had ever had. Pendaer was so close. This wasn't just hand holding like it had been yesterday. No, somehow they had advanced to Pendaer practically draping himself around Tracou.
"You're really small," Pendaer said carefully.
"I'm not!"
Aside from the awkwardness of trying to make himself smaller, Pendaer was a decent teacher. The elf spent a good amount of time explaining exactly what he had to do and practiced pulling the string with Tracou, which was much more difficult than it had seemed from watching Pendaer. Exerting that much effort made his hold on the bow shaky. His stamina, already lowered from wandering around Shalen for the better part of a day, was not good enough for prolonged practice with a bow.
By the time Pendaer deemed him ready to try making an arrow fly, the sun had set. The dark was rapidly approaching. The woman running the archery area had packed most of her things away and was waiting impatiently for them off to the side.
"Dezmek can see in the dark, can't they?"
Like most creatures with slit pupils, dezmek had little trouble seeing at night. Humans hated the dark and largely refused to move around after nightfall, but dezmek didn't, which had caused some conflict between the two races in the past. Dezmek tended to do as the humans did when outside of Dezmer to avoid this conflict.
"Yes."
"So you can see the target?"
"Yes..."
"Let's try actually shooting an arrow, okay?"
"Pendaer, I'm tired."
"I'll help you."
By helping, what he had apparently meant was that he would do it for him. He took the bow away from Tracou and then had Tracou put his hands over his own. This both took pressure off of him and added a different, somehow more dire pressure.
"Help me aim."
This, at least, was something Tracou could do. He directed the bow to aim the arrow at the center of the target as best as he could.
"Right there."
Pendaer nodded. He pulled the string back, held it, and let it go. Because Tracou had zero input aside from the aiming, the arrow flew into the target instead of flopping awkwardly onto the ground. The arrow hadn't pierced the center, but it had hit the target all the same.
"We make a good team," Pendaer said as he handed the bow and what arrows they had left to the woman.
Tracou wiggled his arms, grimacing at how stiff they felt. He might not be able to lift anything heavier than his wand for days.
"At night maybe. You wouldn't need me in the day. Anyway, Pendaer, I'm exhausted."
"You dezmek don't have any endurance."
The only response Tracou gave to that was some kind of annoyed grunt. He didn't want to engage in much chatter when he could be using that energy to walk back to the inn. Not only that, but he had things to think about.
In spite of Tracou's efforts to lock down that side of him, he thought Pendaer was handsome. It wasn't fair. Why didn't he feel like this around women? Everyone else did. Pendaer probably did, too. Sure, he had called Tracou cute, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. There was at least a foot difference between their heights, so Pendaer could just think of him as a child.
The two of them walked side by side as they made for the inn. At one point, Pendaer patted Tracou on the shoulder to get his attention. Tracou turned his head and they met each other's eyes. Pendaer stopped dead in his tracks, staring at Tracou as though a hand was growing out of his nose.
For a brief, horrifying moment, Tracou didn't understand what could have made Pendaer look at him like that. Had he figured it out? Had Tracou betrayed himself, making his uncomfortable attraction to Pendaer obvious?
"Your eyes are..." he trailed off, still staring at Tracou.
Oh.
In order to see well in the dark, a dezmek's eye was constructed differently than a humans or an elf's. In the dark and at the right angle, dezmek eyes glowed. What color they reflected depended on the color of their eyes during the day time. Tracou's eyes were blue, so they glowed red at night.
Tracou faced forward, away from Pendaer. "I forgot about that. It's normal at home, but I know humans hate seeing it. I guess elves do, too."
"It... is unnerving," Pendaer admitted.
A cold silence descended on them as they began walking again. Why dezmek eyes bothered other people shaped creatures, Tracou didn't know. It was understandable up to a point, but they were just eyes. Pendaer's ears were a strange shape and yet no one was afraid of them.
Now approaching the inn, Tracou felt resigned to an awkward night and possibly an awkward goodbye. Maybe Pendaer would decide to leave tomorrow morning. While the humans of Shalen were used to dezmek, they still had a hard time looking at them at night. It was possible that an elf, a member of the most isolationist race on the continent, would be unable to tolerate dezmek eyes at night.
Maybe it was for the best. If Pendaer pulled away now, Tracou could pretend that he had never met him.
Pendaer abruptly stepped in front of him, interrupting Tracou's thoughts. He leaned down, looking into his eyes.
"What are you doing?" Tracou asked, turning his head away from Pendaer.
"Look at me."
"Ugh..." Tracou did as he was told, though reluctantly.
It felt like an hour passed by as Pendaer just stared at him and his eyes. How well could he see him, with those round pupils? This was an exercise in futility.
"It's unnerving," Pendaer concluded.
"You already said that!"
Pendaer nodded. "But it's okay! Maybe it's good for you. You're not at all intimidating without it."
"It only happens at night."
"You would be an easy target, right? Because you're small... but I don't think humans would attack someone with shiny, red eyes."
"Tch. Maybe."
"When I think about it more..." Pendaer tilted his head. "It's unnerving and kind of cute."
A little thrill went through Tracou at the word 'cute,' but he was careful to quash the feeling as best as he could. Thinking about it was dangerous.
"In what world is this cute?"
"Cats have eyes like this, right?"
Tracou scoffed. "Dezmek are closer to snakes than cats."
As far as the dezmek were concerned, they were related to snakes. Snakes were a beloved animal in Dezmer and it was taboo to kill one for any reason. They were frequently kept as pets. Not only that, but it was seen as good luck to have a snake live nearby. If one had a snake living in the house and the snake left of its own accord, that was an awful omen. More superstitious dezmek would build a new home somewhere else if they were able.
"Really? But snakes don't have shiny eyes."
This was true. But, of course, dezmek had an answer to this.
"They did, a long time ago. They graciously gave us their eyes because they don't need them the same way we do. Because of that, their children were born with different kinds of eyes."
Pendaer gaped at Tracou. "So dezmek come from snakes?"
"You didn't know that?" A pause. "I suppose an elf wouldn't know."
"You're not much like a snake, Tracou."
"What?! Why not?"
"You don't sneak around and I don't think you can open your mouth that wide. But..."
"But?" Tracou repeated, leaning in eagerly.
"But you are pretty low to the ground," Pendaer said. The smug look on his face was unbearable.
"You—! I should make you sleep outside!"
Tracou marched into the inn with Pendaer following him, laughing all the way.