"Manliligaw ka ba ni Eva?"
"Dad!"
Halos mabilaukan ako dito nang dahil sa tanong ni Dad. Hindi, sa'n ka nakatira, ilang taon ka na ba, pa'no kayo nagkakakilala, but 'yon kagad ang tinanong ni Papa! Lumunok ako tinignan si Juan because at the moment, Juan's reaction is the only thing that matters!
But then, he is smiling!
Wow, hindi talaga siya kinakabahan no?
"Bakit?" Dad asked innocently. "Natural lang yun ang itatanong ko."
"Binibigla mo naman ang bata.." Mom interrupted and ngumuso ako agreeing with her.
"Fine... mamaya na lang tayo mag-usap Juan. Yung lalake sa lalake lang. Tapusin na lang muna natin ang ating pagkain" Dad told him at tumango naman si Juan. "Yes po".
Binilisan ko ang aking pagkain para makasali ako sa kung ano man ang pag-uusapan nina Dad at Juan, ngunit hindi ako nagtagumpay. Dad did not let me join them. He wants me to go up to my room.
"Dad, please, I want to join what are you guys going to talk about." I whined at my Dad pero he just shook his head for the third time.
"No. This is going to be a boys' talk." sabi niya and mas lalo akong ngumuso kasi I don't really want to leave Juan. Baka kasi ano pa ang masabi or makwento ni Dad sa kanya.
"...sige na Eva, go to your room. Mag-uusap lang kami ni Juan.." he repeated.
Tumingin ako kay Juan na na huli kong nakatingin na sa'kin. "It's okay Eva. I'll be alright. Punta ka na sa kwarto mo" he assured while giving me his sweet smile.
I gave him a worried look. Siya, magiging maayos, pero ako? Hindi ako mapapanatag knowing Dad na alam kong hindi 'to magiging madali para sa kanya after what happened before. Alam ko rin na na this time, sisiguraduhin ni Papa na hindi na talaga mauulit pa yung nangyari nung una. He really loves me too much.
Bumagsak ang balikat ko and sigh in defeat. Tinitigan ko si Dad na nagmamakaawa that please he better be good! And huwag niyang masyadong takutin si Juan. Hindi naman sa nahihibang na'ko but, baka dahil dito, dahil sa takot, Juan might back out and that basically means, I might loose him. And I don't want that to happen, no one doesn't want that to happen. Kasi, honestly, I've never like someone as Juan. My feelings for him is continuing overflowing! Hindi ko alam kung like pa ba 'to. Baka nga, mahal ko na 'tong tao 'to e. Hay.
Pumayag na'ko at umakyat na ng kwarto. And when I got in to my room, agad ko namang kinuha ang cellphone ko para i-text si Juan.
Text Message
Juan GDL
Today 8:09 pm
Hey, I might sound crazy but
kung ano man yung sasabihin
ni Daddy sa'yo, I hope hindi
magbabago feelings mo sakin :(
and please deal with my Dad.
He's really like that. Sana u
would understand him too if he's
going to being hard on u.
Message was sent ✔️. Hay nako. I really do sound crazy when I sent that to him. I just prayed lang talaga na everything will be okay and alright tonight.
I lay down on my bed and stared up in the ceiling. Kailan kaya sila matatapos? Baka, papauwiin ni Dad si Juan nang hindi ko nalalaman kaya I opened my phone again, para itext si Dad.
Text Message
Daddy
Today 8:19 pm
Dad, pagtapos na kayo mag-
usap ni Juan, pls tell me ah
and please don't be so hard
to Juan hehehe. He may appears
brave, pero you know, kinakabah-
an din yan. Hehe.
love u!
Matapos ko rin ma-send 'yon kay Daddy, bumukas ang pinto ng kwarto ko at pumasok naman si Ate.
"They're outside, talking." She says smiling as she walks over to my bed at umupo sa may paa-an ko.
"Did you hear them?" tanong ko sa kanya.
"No, sumilip lang ako kung nasa'n sila and they looked like having a really serious conversation. Dad looked so serious e" she says at napabuntong hininga na lamang ako. Hay nako.
Suddenly, Ate burst into laugh at napatingin ako sa kanya. "Charot lang! They didn't looked so serious. Parang they were just having a casual conversation." tawa niya and I have her a glare.
"Ate! Seriously?" I asked her because it's making more worried!
"Yeah, I promise, like casual talk lang talaga sila" sabi niya na natatawa pa rin. "Juan was smiling when I saw them"
I sigh in relief to hear that and sana lang talaga, this night will be good for me and for us. Sana naman pumayag si Daddy when Juan's going to court me.
"Pero, ang gwapo pala ni Juan sa malapitan no? Tapos panga-hin din siyang lalake" sabi naman ni Ate and I couldn't help but agreed. Super. Kaya nga andaming nagkakandarapa sa Gerardo ko. Andaming puso nabihag hindi lang dahil sa pagbabasketball at paguugali niya kundi syempre, aminin natin, sa kagwapuhan niya rin.
"Hindi ba mahirap sa'yo maging malapit sa isang GDL? Sa isang Juan Gomez de Liaño?" Ate asked and I looked at her in confused look. "What do you mean?"
"You know, alam naman natin na maraming nagkakacrush sa kanya, that basically means, marami ka rin kaagaw. Ano ba nararamdaman mo? Hindi ka ba nagseselos?" she explained at umiling naman ako once I understand what she's trying to mean.
"No, of course not. Since the first time I knew about Juan, I already knew that he got hundreds or even thousands that had their head over heel to him. Hindi rin ako nagseselos sa mga fans niya because naging fan din ako. I don't feel anything because after all, they were there for him since day one bago ako" Totoong tugon ko kay Ate.
Me, being jealous? Ano naman pagseselosan ko? Juan's fans are Juan's everything. They've been with him through ups and downs. They want nothing but the best for him and hindi ko naman yun ipagkakait sa kanila. I'm not that kind of person.
"Sabagay, they were there nga for him before you. Tsaka, wala ka rin naman ikakaselos. Nanakaw mo na puso ni Juan" Ate then laughs and I only shook my head na nangigngiti.
"So how is he when he's with you?" Ate curiously asked me as she also lays na rin in her stomach at ipinatong ang kanyang ulo sa nakasalalikop niyang mga kamay.
"...nakikita ko lagi yung mga Instagram at Snapchat story ni Juan na walang araw ata hindi ko nakikita mukha mo doon. He always posts about you or kaya picture niyong dalawa."
True. Ever since naging malapit kami ni Juan sa isa't isa, lagi na siyang nags-snapchat or kaya nag i-instagram story na nandoon ako. Hindi uso sa kanya yung mga private muna or kaya yung mga secret. Pinapa-alam niya kagad sa lahat. He doesn't care what others will say. At dahil do'n, nafe-feel kong he really appreciates me and that he's proud of me.
And same goes to me, I am also proud of him and I also appreciate him more than he ever knows. I always thank God for the existence of Juan na nakilala ko siya and for giving me also this beautiful man too na akala ko hanggang tanaw lang ako sa kanya. Thank You 👆🏼.
"Um.. he's great... he's an ideal... he always makes feel appreciated and loved. He's everything that every girl wants. Basta Ate, I don't have anything to ask for na talaga. All I can say I'm really lucky and thankful to have him" I told her answering her question of how Juan's with me while smiling from ear to ear.
I feel like everyone really must know that Juan is really such a beautiful human being. Wala na'kong mahihiling pa.
"Do you love Juan na ba? You looked so whipped and sound so in love to him!" she squeals and that made me think of that.
Mahal ko na ba si Juan? Yes Eva, ever since you laid your eyes on him mahal mo na ang tao na 'yon! I heard my subconscious mind tell me.
"Am I?" tanong ko kay Ate na alam kong hindi naman niya masasagot yun.
"Gaga! I don't know the answer with that. Ikaw lang nakakaalam 'yan" sabi niya while rolling her eyes.
"...but then, for me, it seems that you are. I remember my instructor once told me before na if you ask yourself daw na mahal mo na ba yung isang tao, the answer to that is yes. Kasi in truth daw, deep down, you love that person already. Hindi mo pa lang inaamin because something is pulling you away from that thought na sinasabihan ka na, it's not yet the right time to love, it's too early...."
"and for your case, I think, pinipigilan mo lang sarili mo about the thought of loving him. Kasi pwede rin it's too early pa para sa'yo or kaya you're just afraid na baka iiwan ka lang din- which are the things you shouldn't believe. You should listen to your heart Eva. Go with your heart so that you won't have a hard time during the process. Believe me"
Okay? Where did Ate got those words from? When did her wisdom came all of a sudden? Iyon na ata ang pinakamagandang advice na narinig ko sa kanya! W.O.W
"Ba't bigla ka na lang naging thought catalog or poemsporn? Ate! grabe naman yung wisdom mo!" Tuwa kong wika sa kanya.
Thought Catalog and poemsporn by the way are Instagram accounts na nagpopost ng mga wisdoms things about relationships, friendships, challenges- in general, they talk about love and life na for sure, may matutunan ka.
"I don't know, thanks for the Philo class, I guess. I learned a lot from that subject." she laughs and I think, I should also get a Philo class na rin this second sem. Iyon lang ata ang practical subject na I think matutulungan ako sa totoong buhay.
I heard my phone sounds and felt it vibrated.
Text Message Notification
Juan GDL - Eva 😔 • 2s
"Shit" I whispered when I saw Juan's message came up. Bumilis ang kabog ng dibdib ko and I had a feeling na this is not good.
"Bakit?" Ate asks as she look up at me.
"Nagtext si Juan" I say and showed her the message that Juan sent to me. Shit. Lumamig ang kalamnan ko and I really feel like hindi ni Dad pinayagan si Juan.
"Don't tell me hindi ni Dad pinayagan si Juan na manligaw sa'yo?" she says in disbelief after reading the message na ipinakita ko sa kanya at napakibit-balikat ko. "I don't know"
I was going to reply Juan if everything's okay, but Dad message came up.
Text Message Notification
Daddy - pwede ka ng bumababa •1s
"Pwede na raw akong bumaba sabi ni Daddy" Wika ko kay Ate and with that, tumayo na'ko sa kama ko and lumabas na ng kwarto without even bothering to reply.
I jog my way downstairs at nakita kong nasa living room na sila ngayon. I stared at the two men in front of me and they looked so serious. Hindi ko na rin nakita yung ngiti ni Juan ngayon.
"Um.. pwede ko po bang malaman, what did you guys talked?" I nervously asked and ewan ko ba pero I'm not ready to hear either of their answers. Iba talaga ang kutob ko.
Huminga nang malalim si Dad. "Ihatid mo muna si Juan sa labas, uuwi na siya"
"H-ha?" I stuttered because at the back of my mind, talagang, para atang this is not really a good news. Feeling ko iiyak na'ko dito.
"Yes. Saka ko na sasabihin sa'yo pagnahatid mo na siya" Tango ni Papa sakin and I looked at him giving him a worried look.
Please.
Tumingin din ako kay Juan and he half smiled at me ngunit hindi ko siya nginitian pabalik. I don't feel good at the moment. Hindi ko kayang ngumiti sa kanya ngayon.
"Sir, I'll go na po. It was really nice meeting you and your family" Juan then told my Dad as he goes for a handshake with him.
"No problem Juan. Masaya rin akong pumunta ka dito" Dad smiled at him and accepted his handshake. "Hon, aalis na si Juan"
Lumabas naman ulit si Mama galing kusina and I'm wondering why she's in the kitchen na naman.
"Oh. You're going home na Juan?" Mom asked him as she came near us. And then Juan nodded at my Mom in response. "Yes po Tita"
"Okay. By the way, how's your talk pala boys?" she asked with enthusiasm looking at them.
"It's alright." Iyon lamang ang sinagot ni Daddy kay Mama. Mom looked at him like his answer wasn't enough or it's not the answer that she expects to hear.
Dumapo naman ang tingin ni Mommy sa'kin like she also wants to hear something from me pero I shrug my shoulders giving her a look na hindi ko rin alam.
"Ihahatid ko lang po si Juan sa labas." I told them.
Nagpaalam na si Juan sa kanila, he gave my Mom a beso and my Dad and him went for a hug. After that, lumabas na kami ng bahay.
Tahimik akong naglakad patungo sa gate namin and him, trailing behind. I'm so scared to ask him kung ano ang pinag-usapan nila kasi feeling ko I'll be hurt with his answer. Binuksan ko na ang gate namin at and we're out of the house.
"Eva" Juan called and tumayo siya sa harapan ko. Nakayuko lamang ako habang nakatayo kami sa harapan ng kanyang sasakyan.
"Why are you quiet?" tanong niya and he grabbed my face to look at him. Tumitig naman ako sa kanya at ngumiti nang malungkot while shaking my head. "Wala lang. Sige, pasok ka na sa sasakyan mo"
"Aren't you going to ask kung ano pinag-usapan namin ng Dad mo?" tanong niya sakin at umiling naman ulit ako. "Hindi na. I'll just go ask Dad later."
"Okay." sabi niya saka siya bumitaw ng malalim na hininga.
"..but, just so you know, it will not hurt you." dugtong niya before he breaks a smile at me.
"What do you mean?" I asked in a puzzled look. Ha? Ano ibig-sabihin niya?
"Ask mo nalang Dad mo." he replied while letting out a laugh and I frowned at him naman. "No. Tell me na lang. I'll ask Dad right after."
"Hmm"
Juan stared at me for a couple of seconds before he closed the gap between us at yinakap ako. His head rested on my shoulder as he enveloped me, trapping my body on his arms.
Meanwhile, ako ay nalilito at the moment.
"Eva, your Dad and I are just joking on you. What your thinking right now is not true.... kasi your Dad allowed me to make ligaw to you na" he whispers on my hair at bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko, trying to process what I just heard.
Holy shit. Ano?
Kumalas ako sa yakap niya and looked at him. "W-what?... Manliligaw ka na sakin? Did Dad approved you?" I asked him with wide eyes.
"Yes. Pumayag na Daddy mo" He smiles and I immediately slapped his arm as tears fall onto my cheeks. "Nakakainis ka!" I cried pero may halo iyon na tawa.
Juan burst into laugh more. "Why are you crying?" he asks chuckling while wiping the tears on my face with his thumb.
"Akala ko talaga hindi pumayag si Dad!" I exclaimed and slapped his arm once again. "You're so mean! You guys almost broke my heart."
Yinakap naman uli ako ni Juan wrapping his arms around my waist and hugged me tightly again. I also hugged him back, wrapping my arms around his chest.
"I'm not going to break your heart Eva. That's the least thing, I wouldn't do. My priority right now is you baby. To take care of you just like what I promised to your Dad. That I'll give you everything within me and make sure you're named after every word I speak."