"Hello, you must be Emma Swan and Killian Jones?" a man with red curly hair says. He stands up to greet both of them and shake their hands. He seems like a very friendly man, with welcoming blue eyes under a pair of thick glasses that seem to slide along his nose when he stands up. He gives them a warm friendly smile.
"Yes," Emma says, swallowing hard.
"Aye," Killian answers.
"Come in, make yourselves comfortable and then we can begin."
Emma sits down on a leather couch and Killian joins besides her. He offers her his hands, which she takes, both of them interlocking their fingers. The office has a very welcoming feeling, there are several windows letting in the February sunshine and there are various pictures of flowers and nature hanging from the walls. On one side of the room is the psychologist's desk with his computer and stacks upon stacks of papers. Beside his desk is a towering bookshelf filled with psychology volumes on various subjects including martial struggles, coping with death, structural child psychology and mental illness. Emma stares at the books for a long few moments before the doctor shuts the door and sits in a leather chair across from the couple.
"Welcome, allow me to introduce myself, I'm Dr. Archibald Hopper. Before we even begin, I want you to know that anything and everything you say is completely confidential with the only exceptions being you're going to hurt yourself, someone else or any indications of child abuse. Is that understood?"
Both of them nod.
"Good, well I suppose we can begin, can you tell me why you're here?"
Emma swallows and looks over at Killian. They lock eyes for a few moments before Emma nods, allowing him to speak first.
"Well... uh... Emma has been going through an extremely difficult time since she was rescued from captivity by a monstrous man. The trauma of it all seems to be too much for her and I worry about her health, well-being, and the safety of our child."
"I see, now can you describe to me why you think Emma is having trouble?"
"Her nightmares are the most concerning. She can't sleep through the night anymore. She wakes up screaming at the top of her lungs and has the urge to check on myself and Henry."
"Who is Henry?"
"My son from a previous relationship," Emma pipes up.
"And how old is Henry?"
"He's 15."
"I see and you, Emma, feel the need to make sure Killian is safe as well?"
She nods.
"And why is that?"
A chill goes up Emma's spine and she takes in a sharp breath. "I think it's because they are the two that mean the most to me and I'd feel lost without them. T-They were the only people that I thought about during that time in the cabin."
"And what cabin was this and where?"
"I don't really know. The m-man who abducted me took me there in the trunk of his car He basically made the place a prison to keep me there."
"And why was he keeping you there."
It's Killian's turn to swallow hard, knowing the answer and dreading it. He squeezes Emma's hand tightly to let her know he's there for her.
"H-He wanted to... g-get me p-pregnant,"
Emma waits for Dr. Hopper to react with disgust or shock as everyone else had, but instead, he keeps a professional face and gives an empathetic look. He makes a small note on a pad of paper and continues eye contact with his patients.
"And it's obvious he failed, am I correct?" the doctor asks.
Killian nods. "Aye, after she was rescued, we found out that the baby was conceived a month before she was grabbed and the blood tests just came back the other day confirming that the baby is indeed mine and Emma's."
"Well, I suppose I can extend some congratulations to you both before you continue."
Emma puts a hand over her baby bump as if to reassure herself and their daughter. "Thank you."
"So, he kept you locked in the cabin correct?"
"Y-yes and before that, I was handcuffed to a bed in his basement."
Killian's heart pounded against his chest. Ever so slowly, he was getting details of his girlfriend's captivity and what she endured. He felt very torn, wanting to know what happened and at the same not because all of it wanted to make him find the bastard and tear him limb from limb.
"And what did he do to you?"
Emma's handshakes and she feels tears welling up in her eyes. She grips her docks man's hand very tightly. Her bottom lip quivers in fear so much that she must bite it to keep it still. Horrifying flashbacks of the nights and nights of being drugged and taken advantage fill her mind. The drugs were often so strong, she never knew what was real and what was a hallucination, but by the end, she felt filthy and horrible in the end.
"He...he..."
"It's okay, take your time," Dr. Hopper says softly.
"He raped me."
Emma shuts her eyes as tears began running down her face. The pain and horror she endured during those four months make her entire body weak to the point that she just might collapse onto the floor. She lets go of Killian's hand and covers her face. The overwhelming emotions make her want to curl up into a ball on the floor. She wants the memories to go away, but they keep coming and coming, over and over, like a poison in her mind that is taking over her body, leaving her helpless, like the nights in Arthur's prison.
Killian instinctively reaches out to hug her, his heart breaking with the sight of her tears.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Emma screeches and he backs off.
He feels hurt by this rejection, but this was becoming a common event. He couldn't hold the woman he loved, to comfort her and tell her that she's okay now when she is clearly beyond comfort and not okay. It's a new kind of pain, not being able to comfort a loved one. He feels tears of his own floating to the surface of his eyes.
Dr. Hopper goes to his desk and offers Emma some tissues. When she doesn't take them, he leaves next to her. He then sits down again and passively watches his female patient. It was quite clear to him that Emma had endured unspeakable revulsions and was very traumatized by them. He had talked and helped rape victims before, but Emma's was a slightly different take considering she was kept in captivity and put through this abuse likely daily. He makes a few notes on his pad of paper and continues to watch her.
Killian becomes angrier and angrier, upset that Emma was suffering so much and he couldn't do anything about it.
"Bloody hell," he hisses under his breath. "Do something doctor!"
Archibald looks over at Killian and frowns in concern.
"Mr. Jones, can I talk to you privately for a moment outside?"
The bright blue eyes of the docks man narrow but he nods and gets up. He continues to stare at Emma.
"Take your time Emma," Dr. Hopper says. "I'll be right outside for a few moments. Okay?"
Emma peeks from her hands and then nods, trying to collect herself a little bit.
The two men walk out into the hallway and the doctor shuts the door.
"I understand this is hard for you Mr. Jones," Archibald Hopper says. "I can tell that she's struggling to be intimate, which is often very common for rape victims. I know it's hard not only for the victim but the spouse or partner and family as well."
"You're supposed to be making her feel better, not worse!" Killian points out. "You're supposed to be giving her suggestions on how to cope with her nightmares and panic attacks."
"Mr. Jones, I'm sure you're aware that counselling of any type takes a long time?"
"Aye," he nods.
"And this is part of the process. Believe it or not, the fact that Emma was able to say the word rape and acknowledge what happened is progress already. I've met with clients who lived in denial for a long time and refused to even say the words of their abuse of their abuser. Emma needs to be allowed to feel awful about what happened. She needs to let that pain out. It can be very distressing to watch and I'm thinking I should organize half-hour sessions with each of you individually and then bring you together in the end. It is sometimes too hard for the partner to watch the other in pain and sometimes being together can hinder the healing process. Do you understand?"
Killian swallows and wipes a few tears from his eyes before nodding.
"It's okay to be sad Mr. Jones, you have suffered just as much as Emma has and it is clear that you care about her a great deal."
"More than you'll ever know," he says.
"And I will do the best that I can to help you both heal and work together to move on. It's going to take time, but I do have confidence that both of you will pull through. We'll work on all the issues that you need to and hopefully, you'll start to feel better in time for the birth of your baby."
The docks man nods. "Thank you, Dr. Hopper."
"Are you prepared to go back inside?" Dr. Hopper asks.
He nods and follows the red-haired man back in.
Emma has composed herself a little bit, using the tissues to wipe her eyes. She feels embarrassed and awful over everything. She wasn't used to showing her emotions, especially in front of a stranger, but she couldn't help it. The nights of abuse and her abductor keep coming back to haunt her, especially in her dreams. She didn't want to lose Henry or Killian, but the thought of Arthur King coming back horrifies her. She realizes that she was so distracted by the reunion, she forgot to ask if Arthur had been caught. Her heart races and her head begins to spin. She should have asked David about it and told her story and yet, she didn't want to talk about it, re-live the nightmare that was her life for over four months.
She gives Killian a weak smile before he comes to sit down, but with some distance between them. She felt awful for shunning his attempts to comfort her earlier, but her body was like a roller coaster. One moment she wanted to be in his arms, the next she was repulsed and didn't want to be near anyone.
She slowly reaches out, offering her hand to him. He is hesitant, to say the least, but she must be comfortable enough if she's instigating the gesture. He takes her hand and they interlock their fingers again.
"I'm so sorry Killian," she whispers.
"It's alright, Love."
She smiles again and he returns the gesture.
"You have nothing to be sorry about Miss Swan," Dr. Hopper says gently. "What you are experiencing is quite normal for someone who was victimized."
"It is?"
"Yes. It's clear to me that you have suffered a lot and the trauma of your experience has led to these terrible nightmares and emotional breakdowns. Also, the repulsive feelings about intimacy are very common."
"So, what do I do?" Emma asks.
"We're going to take it one step at a time and only talk about what you are comfortable with discussing. Killian and I have agreed that perhaps separate half-hour sessions will work best for both of you and then coming together at the end. The reason for this is because sometimes it's hard for one partner to watch their significant other suffer like this. Do you think that will work Emma?"
Emma looks at Killian and squeezes his hand. He looks into her beautiful green eyes. They still looked as amazing as the first day he saw them, the only difference was, they were bloodshot from crying and stress. Despite how she felt, Emma still looked beautiful to him. He gives her his odd half-smirk for comfort.
"I-I think so."
"That's good. You've actually made good progress today Emma; the expression of your emotions and accepting what happened to you is an excellent starting point for this. What is going to happen from here is that I'll schedule the next session and we can talk about anything you'd like, even if it's very irrelevant, like your favourite flavour of ice cream. If it gives you comfort, I'll accept it without batting an eye. I want you both to feel as if you can tell me anything and all of us will work together to find the solutions to our problems. Does that sound agreeable to you?"
Killian looks at Emma. "I will do whatever she wants."
Emma thinks about it for a few moments. She knew that she wasn't the same person she once was. She'd endured terrible misfortune and trauma from this event and she knew if she wanted to still be a mother to her son and unborn daughter, she'd need this help. She also wanted to continue exploring her relationship with Killian, what they could do to help her heal and achieve the level of intimacy they'd felt a few months back. The expectation of being "normal" again was unlikely, she knew that, but she needed to feel better, for the sake of her loved ones. She looks at Killian for reassurance. He smiles at her and she can see some tears in his eyes. He pulls her hand closely and kisses it gently. She shudders slightly by the contact, but it wasn't all bad. She wanted to be with him and with their baby on the way, they had to work together to hopefully find a future for themselves and their growing family.
"Yes," Emma says quietly.
"Very good. Well, it was nice to meet you both and I've set up a time on Tuesday next week. I also heard that you have a son named Henry. Would you mind if I met with him at some point as well, just to see how he's doing?"
Emma swallows hard and then nods slowly. "Yes, we can bring him."
"Only if you and he are comfortable to do so. Thank you for coming in and I'll see you both next week,"
"Thank you, Dr. Hopper," Emma says, standing up to shake the man's hand.
"My pleasure and please call me Archie."
So shaken up from the wedding episode tonight! IT FINALLY HAPPENED! Captain Swan is married. It was so moving and it made me laugh too. The songs were very catchy too. I was amazed by the actors' abilities to sing. Here's the first step with Emma getting help. I'll limit the therapy sessions a little bit so this doesn't become a psychology book that might be a bit boring. Please keep in mind that I am not a therapist/counsellor myself, some of this is based on a course I took last year. If you have any suggestions about how to make these sessions as realistic as possible, please let me know. Thank you, and good night!