© Copyright 2012
All work is property of Leah Crichton, any duplication or reproduction of all or part of the work without explicit permission by the author is illegal.
Alexa swiped a small circle in the steam covered mirror to examine her face. It was sun kissed or wind burnt, she wasn't sure which and a faint pink line stretched across the bridge of her nose like a rainbow. Did she really need a makeover?
The steam in the bathroom began to dissipate and she collected her pajamas from the back of the door before leaving, clad in a fluffy towel to decide on what she'd wear for the day. Since Rachel was a guest, she'd showered first. It was reasonable to assume she was on her second if not third cup of coffee by now.
She changed into blue jeans and a tank top she'd had with a screen of a sugar skull on the front. It was the most punk/rock thing she owned and it was a hand-me-down from Rachel. She ran a brush through her hair and secured it in a ponytail.
The kitchen was abuzz. Gabby sat in her usual spot at the table observing Rachel eating. She was probably trying to figure out where Rachel hid all the food she ate. She was like a walking advertisement for junk yet stick thin. Her plate was covered in three pop tarts and she had a cereal bowl that was so full, Captain Crunches were threatening to erupt from the sides. Charlie sat beside Gabby while Devin did what Devin did best. Talked.
“We're taking Alexa for a makeover today,” she advised. “For the party.”
Gabby looked stunned by the female hormones coming at her from every corner of the kitchen and stood, her chair scraping along the tile floor. “Lex, you didn't tell me there was a party.”
“It's more like dinner,” Alexa told her. “So it's not like a house party.”
Rachel spooned Captain Crunch into her mouth. “It's like a house party with food.”
Alexa glared at Rachel. She didn't need to be complicating things. All she needed to do was shut up and eat.
“Is there going to be drinking at this party?” Gabby asked.
Alexa's eyes darted to Charlie who up until now was quiet. She was a little bit older and obviously more practiced at being a young adult in the traditional sense of the word. Charlie straightened in her chair, picking up on the desperation Alexa was feeling. “There's alcohol, but everyone's keys are going into a basket at the beginning of the evening. Sebastian is taking care of cabs if they're needed. But I promise you Ms. Montgomery, we're responsible. It's not like a frat party or anything. It's a surprise party for Sawyer with only a few close friends.”
“I won't drink,” Alexa added.
Gabby smiled. “I'm not concerned about you drinking yourself into oblivion, Alexa. I am however concerned about drinking and driving. It's Saturday night, how easy do you think it's going to be to get a cab?”
“Probably not very easy,” Devin chimed in.
Alexa wished Devin was stuffing her face like Rachel. This entire thing was going from bad to worse and she was sure Aunt Gabby was going to forbid her from attending. She'd been the victim of a person who'd driven under the influence and it cost her the love of her life and best friend, Martin.
“Right,” Gabby said. “Not very easy. I'd pick you up, but I'm going out tonight.”
Alexa nodded. “Rachel and I can walk home.”
“Give your head a shake,” Gabby said. “You are not walking home in the middle of the night by yourselves.”
“So I can't go?” Alexa felt her lip begin to tremble.
“You can go,” Gabby said. “I just want to ensure you're safe. You know how I feel about these things.”
Having watched Gabby almost lose the battle to her grief a few years ago was a memory Alexa would never forget.
“Mrs. Montgomery,” Charlie said. “Alexa can stay at my place. We're in walking distance of Sawyer and Lane's place and Sebastian will be with us.”
Devin laughed. “She's safer with Sawyer.”
Thank God Gabby ignored her. “Alright. You girls can go, but be responsible. Know when to draw the line.”
Alexa nodded vigorously. “I won't drink, Auntie.”
Gabby looked at the clock. “I have an appointment for massage in half an hour. If I don't see you before you leave, have fun. But not too much.”
After Gabby left, Rachel turned around in her chair. She was done both her poptarts and cereal and was holding the bowl up to her mouth to drink the milk sweetened by the sugar. “Well that could have gone very bad.”
“I know,” Alexa said. “I'm just glad we can go.”
“No one is happier than me,” Devin stated proudly. “C'mon. We have a makeover to complete.”
“Do I really need a makeover?”
“Yes,” Devin and Rachel said together.
Charlie shrugged her shoulders. “Don't look at me, I just have the credit card.”
Two hours later, Alexa sat in a barber chair. The stylist had turned her away from the mirror so she had no idea what was happening. Devin was lit up like a kid at Christmas. “Oh my God, you're so hot.”
Alexa smiled meekly and brought her hands to feel her hair. The ends were freshly cut not too much shorter than they'd originally been. A trim she could deal with just fine but it was the goop of color that was painted on that knotted her stomach.
“Ready?” the stylist asked.
“As I'll ever be,” she mumbled. When they turned her around, Alexa held her hand up to her mouth and gasped. The cut was fine. It was styled in a high ponytail with her fringe in a perfect mock pompadour. Any style could be washed out a redone but her hair! Her ginger hair was gone only to be replaced by something the same hue as her mother's special occasion lipstick. Red. Candy apple red. Alexa leaned forward and gazed in the mirror, her mouth still gaping.
“Do you like it?” Devin asked.
No! It was unnatural looking. “It-I-It's just. It'll take some getting used to,” she managed.
“You look so hot,” Devin said. “Trust me.”
“I did trust you,” Alexa said, pointing a finger to her head. “I look like a fire truck.”
“You look good,” Rachel assured her. “You just need to adapt yourself to the new look.”
Alexa didn’t understand why all of this was necessary. Didn’t Sawyer like her as her old self just fine? “I want to go home,” she said under her breath.
“Now you just need some makeup and new clothes!”
Rachel threw her arms up in the air. “Amen! Praise Jesus.”
Alexa was about to tell her to shut up when Charlie appeared at her side, placing an arm around her reassuringly. “I asked your stylist to make sure the hair color was semi-permanent. It’ll wash out eventually.”
Charlie miraculously knew how Alexa felt about the entire makeover situation. Bless her heart for noticing. “Thank you,” Alexa muttered.
“Sure,” Charlie said. “It’s hard being the girlfriend sometimes. People expect you to look a certain way, when you just want to look like you.”
“Did you change?”
“What I needed to change was mostly on the inside. I was insanely jealous for a long time. I caused Sebastian a lot of grief over having girls throw themselves at him. I was most definitely not myself. That’s the thing. You can dress up for a day or two but Sawyer obviously fell for what’s inside so does it really matter? My sister can be such a pain, but she means well. Ever since I almost died, I kind of give in to whatever she wants because you just never know when your time is up.”
Alexa simply nodded. From her prior internet stalking, she’d learned that Charlie had jumped in front of a bullet for Sebastian because some girl who was insane tried to kill him. What would it be like to love someone that much? So much that you’d sacrifice yourself for him. “Why’d you do it?” she asked before she could stop herself. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly, “It’s none of my business.”
Charlie shook her head. “No it’s alright.” She gazed off to the side, where Devin and Rachel were checking out a rack of nail polish. “It all happened so fast so I guess I wasn’t thinking. I just knew that if something had happened to him… I could never forgive myself for not trying to stop it.”
“I don’t think I’d ever be that brave.”
“Brave no,” Charlie said. “I’m not brave. I’m only in love. You. You’re brave. You’ve put the fate of your appearance in Devin’s hands and I know she’ll love you for it. She wants Sawyer’s birthday to be perfect.”
“I didn’t get him anything,” Alexa said.
Charlie pursed her lips and looked at her watch. “Don’t worry. We still have five hours.”
Sawyer sat with a boot crossed over his knee, pretending to pay attention to the basketball game on TV but really he was thinking about Alexa. How she smiled, how she laughed, the way she looked, the way she smelled, the way she tasted.
Robbie was snapping his fingers in the air, near Sawyer’s face. “Dude, we’re taking bets. Who is gonna win?”
Sawyer didn’t even know who was playing. “The guys in yellow.”
Before Robbie could pick apart his answer, there was a knock at the door. Sawyer stood. “I’ll get it.”
From the arms covered in pink plaid, to the distressed blue jeans and the mess of blonde curls, he could tell Charlie was the face hiding behind the enormous paper bag. “We don’t want any,” he said, taking the bag and smiling.
Charlie ignored him and stepped in, kissing his cheek. “Happy family dinner birthday dinner,” she said.
Sawyer walked to the kitchen and set the bag on the table. “Thanks darlin’. Got any other bags?”
Charlie sighed. “No. I was halfway here before I realized I forgot to buy some stuff. Would you mind running out for some garlic bread?”
He didn't mind but it wasn't in his nature to be so agreeable. It was also not in his nature to be domestic but there was a first time for everything. “But it's my family dinner birthday dinner.”
“I'll go,” she said, turning to leave again.
Sawyer placed his hand firmly on her shoulder. “I was just givin' you a hard time. I'll go. Where's Seabass?”
“He's out with Rosa this afternoon. Mother son time,” Charlie said. “It's a hard thing to come by these days.”
It was good to hear Sebastian was spending time with his mother. Charlie was right. This recent break was the longest they'd been without a show or a signing in the last year and next week with Summer Solstice Concert, the quiet streak was up. “Call me if you need anything else.”
Charlie waved him away dismissively with her hand. She was busy unloading the bag and rooting through the fridge to gather ingredients she'd sent Lane for. Looked like they were having lasagna.
His eyes narrowed at the tin foil pan she retrieved from the cupboard. “Are you feeding a small country? That pan could hold four turkeys.”
“Sebastian asked me to make enough for left overs,” she answered.
Sawyer shook his head, wondering if Seabass had taken to competing in an ironman competition that he didn't know about. As he passed Robbie and Lane in the living room, he said. “I'll be back later. Gotta get Charlie some stuff.”
Their eyes didn't even unglue from the TV long enough to acknowledge his very existence let alone the fact that he was leaving. He looked at the time. Four hours until dinner. As he grabbed his jacket, he thought he might just visit his sister.
Paper Planes on a Saturday versus a weekday was an entirely different place. Sawyer guessed that since the residents who lived here were required to attend therapy the same way society was required to attend a place of employment throughout the week which suggested a pretty free weekend. The sun was once again sweltering and when he pulled his bike up, there were more people he'd ever seen outside on the grass.
A large tall guy, about his own age was working on his golf swing. A girl who really needed to eat a sandwich or two stood next to him.
Another larger group was to their left, about five people practicing serving a volleyball back and forth between them. He squinted to try and find Sadie but didn't see her anywhere. He lit a smoke and walked leisurely to the front doors. That was an undeniable benefit of being here. No one, save for Sadie recognized him. It was nice to walk around like a normal person, even in a place custom made for those who weren't normal.
The hallways were desolate and empty. It was like a ghost town in an old movie. When Sawyer didn't hear any music from Sadie's room, his heart stopped for a moment and he feared the worst. Silence wasn't always golden. He didn't knock.
Sadie was curled in a fetal position on her bed staring blankly out the window.
“What's wrong?”
Sadie didn't respond.
He came closer and he could see she was crying. “M and M,” he whispered. He sat on the edge of her bed and put his hand on her. Her body flinched, tensed then relaxed. “Tell me.”
She shook her head and twisted the upper part of her body so she could look at him. “Some days I wish I just didn't exist.”
Although in his past, he'd had many of those days himself, to hear his little sister say it was like taking a knife to the chest. “Aw, Sadie don't say that.”
“It's true,” she said. “I get so tired of being this way. I wish I could disappear into the walls.”
Sawyer was no stranger to pity parties. Growing up, he threw them for himself often and now, thinking about it, he was a tool. Sadie's problems were bigger than his by leaps and bounds. His woe-is-me paled by comparison.
“I wouldn't know what to do with myself without you,” he said.
“Do you ever miss mom?” she asked.
She wasn't much of a mother as far as his memories told him. A long time ago, maybe before Sadie was born, he remembered her baking cookies and letting him eat the dough right from the bowl. She'd bought him his first guitar when he was three for Christmas. What he didn't miss was her standing by and crying while he got the sole of a steel-toed shoe imprinted on his stomach. Over and over again. “No,” he said, “we're better off without her. We got each other. I don't need anything else.” He couldn't help but think Sadie needed more.
He rubbed along the length of her arm. “Wanna go for a walk with me, M and M?”
She shook her head no.
“Why not?”
“There's monsters outside of this room,” she said. “I can't leave.”
“Sadie, there ain't no monsters.”
“They creep into my head when I try to leave. I can't.”
“What about we go for a ride on my motorbike?”
“No.”
“You wanna go for ice cream?”
“That kind of goes back to your original question and the answer is still no. It's especially no, haven't you read the rule book Sawyer? Patients are not permitted to leave without consent of a Doctor. Not that I'd go anyway. I'm never leaving this room.”
“Look how much fun your friends are having,” he said, pointing to the window.
“Yes, look at my non-existent friends. I don't really know anyone here 'cept for Lindy, who you still haven't met by the way.”
“I'll meet her,” Sawyer said. He reached into his pocket and stuck a smoke between his teeth.
“You can't smoke in here.”
Sawyer raised a brow. “Do you see me lightin' it? Relax or you can join Lane on smoke patrol.”
“I miss Lane,” Sadie said.
“Yeah? Would you come out of your room for him?”
“No.”
He regretted his next question before he even spoke the words. “What about Seabass? Would you come out for him?”
Sadie smirked. “Maybe.”
“Maybe huh? I'll take it.” He kissed her forehead and stood. “I'd better get going. Next time you see me, I'll have Sebastian with me. Don't make me look like a fool, yeah? You promise you'll come out of your room?”
“Maybe.”
He tickled the bottom of her foot and she screamed, squirmed then giggled. “Promise, yeah?”
“Fine,” she said, “promise.”
“You gonna be alright M and M?”
“Yeah,” Sadie said. “Thanks for coming.”
“Love you.”
“You too.”
Sawyer sighed, at some point he'd have a lot of explaining to do. Sebastian was by far the best one of all of them to deal with the fans. He had some kind of gift for making girls feel like they were the only important person in the universe. Sawyer just prayed he could do the same for Sadie. More than that, he prayed his friends would forgive him for failing to mention he had a sister.