...
I sat on the lid of the toilet seat and watched Janelle pace back and forth. "When did y'all even find time to fuck? You were always between Lee, work, or school and Kevin---well he was just never around."
"It happened after he moved out."
"But you were fucking Lee too. That's not good Lys."
"He knew that. It wasn't a secret."
"Yeah Lys, but still---"
"Look. If I wanted to hear a lecture I'd just go to my mom's."
"Well did you at least use protection?"
"Oh my gosh, yes," I sighed.
"Everytime?"
"Yes," I reiterated.
"You did not use no damn protection every time," Janelle argued.
"Oh so you in my pussy now? I used protection with Lee every single time we had sex."
"And with Kevin too?"
"Oh my gosh. Yes," I huffed.
"So how are you pregnant?"
"Condoms aren't one hundred percent effective. You know that. God what are you? A virgin," I teased.
Janelle playfully shoved me. "I'm just trynna make sense of this."
"Well---"
Janelle stopped pacing and stood in front of me. "'Well' what?"
"While we were," I hesitated, "climaxing the condom broke."
Janelle pretended to fall out before sitting down on the edge of the tub visibly confounded. "Okay," she said holding her head, "I have so many questions swirling around in my head right now. Details please."
"Okay. So, Kevin came over here about a month after he gave me my key back. He knocked on my door at like two in the morning, drunk as fuck, talkin bout 'I think I left my watch here do you mind if I come in and get it?' So I'm like 'look it's after two in the morning. Just come back later in the day.' He goes 'What for? I'm already here. Just let me in. I'll be quick.' I didn't feel like gettin into it with him so I let him in. Kevin immediately heads back to the bedroom and starts looking for it. I wanted to go back to sleep, so I started helping him look for it. I found it in the drawer of my nightstand where he used to keep it. So I pull it out and I'm like, 'Here Kev. I found it.' He walks over to me and instead of him grabbing the watch he grabs me by my waist and pulls me in. I'm like 'Kev whatchu doing. You're drunk. You don't really know whatchu doing. You know, it's just not a good idea.' He's ignoring everything I'm saying and blurts out 'I miss you.' Before I could even respond he kissed me. J, I was caught off guard like a mothafucker, but then he kissed me again and I just---I gave in and it was," I exhaled, "amazing."
"Wow," Janelle whispered. "And Oliver? He never suspected?"
I shook my head. "Nah. At least I don't think so." I thought about it for a second. "Shit. Maybe. I don't know," I shrugged.
"So what are you gonna do?"
"I gotta tell Kevin."
"Tell me what," a voice said from the doorway. Janelle and I turned our heads quickly and was shocked to see Kevin standing there.
"Wow," I exhaled quickly. "Um. How long have you been standing there?" I asked.
Kevin shrugged his shoulders. "Long enough to hear you say that you had to tell me something."
I slowly nodded my head. "How'd you get in anyway?"
"The door was unlocked."
I looked over at Janelle and cocked my head to the side. "Really?"
"Sorry there was no time. I was in crisis mode. You wouldn't answer your phone."
Kevin looked at the stick held loosely in between my fingers. "Janelle can you excuse us for a minute? Alyssa and I need to talk."
"Yeah. I have to get ready to head out anyway." Janelle stood up and kissed me on the cheek. "See ya babe. Call me later, okay?"
"Will do. See you J," I said as she walked out of the bathroom. "Lock up," I yelled behind her.
"Okay," she yelled back.
Kevin shut the bathroom door and sat on the edge of the bathtub where Janelle had sat. He looked up at me and then down at my hands. "What's that?" He asked nodding his head towards the pregnancy test. "You pregnant? What it say?" He slid the slender stick from in between my fingers to in between his. He read it. "Two lines mean you're pregnant, right?" I looked down at him. "Yeah," I said softly. "I'm gonna be a dad again," he said getting teary-eyed. "That's what you wanted to tell me?" I nodded my head. "Yep." Kevin put his head down. "Fuck," he mumbled. "How am I gonna explain this to Mena?" I was taken aback. "I'm sorry who? I wasn't aware that you had a Mena." Kevin looked up at me. "She's someone I've been seeing lately." I raised my eyebrow and slowly nodded my head. "Everything just sort of moved fast." "Oh. Okay," I said as I took it all in.
"Listen," Kevin started, "when I came over that night. The night we---"
I nodded my head. "Yeah."
"She told me that she loved me, but I didn't feel the same, so I didn't say it back. That night I got fucked up and had a friend drop me off here. I got all the way to your door and realized that I didn't know what I was gonna say to you. All I knew was that the last time I fell for someone as quickly as Mena fell for me was with you and I just wanted to know if that part of you still lived. I didn't even think you'd be home I just took a chance. When I saw you standing in the doorway I thought 'now there is the woman that I love.'" I started getting misty. Kevin placed the pregnancy test on the edge of the sink. "My reaction tonight was me trynna convince myself that I didn't love you, when it's clear that I still do. I'm sorry about that by the way," he grinned.
"Don't worry about it," I laughed. "It's water under the bridge."
"Good," he smiled.
I looked at him. "Lys," he started, "I want us to get back together." My eyes grew wide and before I could respond Kevin continued. "But you don't have to say anything now. Just sleep on it." He stood to leave. "Listen, I gotta get going, but we'll talk soon." I followed suit and stood up too. "Let me walk you out," I said as he was exiting the bathroom.
At the front door we hugged for, what felt like, a long time. Just as I was pulling away he kissed me. The initial shock of it had me standing awkwardly against his body with no idea of what to do with my hands. It felt like I was fourteen and having my first kiss. After the shock wore off my lips slowly began to find a rhythm that worked with his and then it became like riding a bike. My lips brushed past his ear and remembered seduction. My hands frolicked in his hair and reminisced on love. My body became warm and remembered passion.
Kevin slowly pulled away from me and rested his forehead on mine. "Damn, I missed you," he chuckled. I smiled and brought my hands up to his mouth. "Oops. I got lipstick on you," I said as I gently wiped it away. Kevin kept moving around. "Keep still," I laughed. I rubbed my thumb back and forth over his bottom lip before he playfully pushed me against the wall. He kissed me on my neck. "Kevin," I squealed as I threw my head back in laughter.
A voice cleared in the doorway. "Am I interrupting something?"
I looked over at Oliver and my smile faded. Kevin, however, couldn't contain his grin. "Nah man. I was just leaving." His hands were still sitting at my waist. "Alright Lys," he said as he leaned in and kissed me on the cheek, "I'll text you later." He backed out of the doorway with a grin before disappearing onto the elevator.
Oliver shut the door behind him and turned to me. "So what, you just hoping from dick to dick now?"
I turned around to look at him. "Huh?"
"Did I stutter?"
"Nah, but you're about to. Now you wanna say that fuckin shit again!?"
"I'm not repeating myself. I said what I said."
I folded my arms. "I find it interesting that you're mad, but encouraged me to cheat on him with you. As I recall you didn't care about how what I was doing with you could potentially effect him, because it wasn't you."
"You're weak. You can't stay loyal to one man for five minutes before you're looking for someone new to get under."
"That's not true," I rebutted. "I was never that way with you when we dated."
"How can I be sure when, as of late, you've done nothing to assure my confidence?"
"Wow, you really on your shit tonight! You acting like I was just sleeping around with a bunch of men."
"You might as well have."
"I can't even figure out why you're even mad. It wasn't like we were claiming each other in public!"
"Isn't it obvious!? You were all hugged up on ole dude while claiming to love me! That's fucked up!"
"Oh. You mean how you did Trinity?Now isn't that the pot calling the kettle?" Oliver couldn't even debate me. "And Let's not pretend that you didn't come all the way over here to "break up" with me, so please save the sob story."
"Oh yeah! And how would you know that?"
"What do you mean how would I know? I saw it on your face tonight. You decided that we were over the moment you saw that I was still in love with Kevin!"
Oliver tried to mask his hurt. "Oh word? And what else do you know?"
"That you and I were a mistake that shouldn't have happened twice. I mean, who were we kidding? Thinking that we could do this? I foolishly left my husband for you for the promise that there was something better than his love just waiting on the otherside, but how foolish was I!"
"Wow," he muttered. "You're being dramatic."
"The reason we didn't last the first time wasn't just about the abortion, like I made you believe these past few months."
"Then what was it about? Explain it to me."
"The same reason why I ended our engagement was the same reason why I had the abortion. I was always waiting for you to show up in our relationship and wasn't gonna wait for you to show up for our kid."
Oliver looked confounded.
"Do you even remember what it was like," I said with tears in my eyes. "Everything was always about you. There was never anytime to focus on what we wanted together. You were always so busy with your dad's business! That's all you ever talked about! It was never 'Alyssa how was your day? Or what's on your mind? You didn't care!"
"You don't even understand!" He yelled. "Everything I did was for us! I wanted to make sure that we were always gonna be good when we got married! I loved you, so don't stand there and tell me that I didn't care!"
"Bullshit!" I yelled.
"It's not bullshit! It's the truth!"
"Oh yeah. So tell me how your love for me kept you from Nina's bed at night! Tell me about that! Tell me how much you loved me then! Did you fuck her for "us" too!"
Oliver ran his hand down his face and huffed. "You knew about that? She told you?"
"No. She didn't have to. I saw the text messages that you left in plain sight, idiot!"
"Why didn't you say anything?" He asked, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"I didn't need to. I handled it. I confronted her and made sure you didn't see her again."
"So you were behind that? What did you say?" I didn't respond. "Alyssa. What did you do?"
"You see how you are more interested in what happened to her than you are about what happened to us? Do you see what I mean now? Is it all making sense?"
"If I hurt you that bad why did you let me back in?"
"For the same reason I dated you in the first place. You were charming. You knew the right words to say to pull me in and like a mindless idiot I went along with it." I wiped the tears that were now trickling down my face. I looked at Oliver. "But what I can't seem to figure out now is why you came back."
"I missed you and I wanted to see how you were."
I shook my head. "No. I can't accept that anymore. You knew where I lived. You came over here with a plan. It was solid, well thought out, and it broke up my marriage and since we're truth-telling tonight you betta spill your shit."
Oliver was trying so hard to hold back. He actually started to look worried. "Oliver tell me what's really going on. Why did you come back?" I asked again.
After a serious two minute stare down Oliver finally broke. "Okay. If I'm gonna tell you the truth you're gonna need to sit down---"
"Okay."
"---On your hands---"
"Oliver," I huffed in protest.
"Because you're gonna wanna kill a bitch," he continued.
I cocked my head to the side. "What?"
"Just sit down," he urged. I reluctantly followed suit. He looked at me. "On your hands."
I rolled my eyes and huffed. "Fine," I said tucking my hands underneath me. "Now tell me. And hurry up," I urged.
Oliver spoke quickly. "Your mother paid me to break up you and Kevin." If I was standing I would have fainted. "Alyssa, I'm sorry," was the last thing I heard before everything went black."
...