M
Stupid.
I was stupid.
How foolish could I be?
I'd practically told Damien I was a witness to his crimes, something he never would have found out if I'd just kept my mouth shut. Now I was worrying, worrying endlessly over what he would do to me now that he knew.
Would he kill me?
He easily could even if I wouldn't tell anyone else what I knew. He had to put himself first, how could he even trust me to keep this a secret?
These were the thoughts that plagued my mind for the entirety of my day as I served at Loretta's. I was scared he would walk in at some point, gun at the ready before pointing right at me with those dead eyes of his.
The sound of the overhead door bell every time a customer entered had me nervous. Each and every time it was someone else and not him and I was relieved.
For now.
After saying my goodbyes to Loretta and Cori who would be closing tonight, I stepped out into the breeze. The sunny spells we'd gotten these past few days were no more and we were left with a chilly warmth.
Walking down the street, I greeted those around me from time to time as I made my way home. I was only about five minutes into my walk when I felt the tiny droplets of rain fall down onto my face.
It was a light drizzle that soon developed into heavy rain in such little time. I cursed at my luck, realising I didn't bring my umbrella.
My hair was gonna hate me..
I had another 30 minutes of a walk left before I even got to my apartment but in this rain it would take longer. Finding shelter by the entrance of a random shop, I looked at the many cars that sped past along with pedestrians with their umbrella's.
The rain was not yielding and I knew it would be a while before the skies cleared. So I decided it was best to wait it out until the rain lessened but fate had other plans.
As I wrapped my arms around my body, my sights fell to a blacked out car cruising slowly down the street. I didn't like how slow it was moving, more importantly I didn't like how it came to a sudden halt in front of where I stood.
The only thing separating me from the car was the footpath but it wasn't enough. I stared on in anticipation, waiting for the worst to happen and the worst did happen.
Damien stepped out.
Holding his suit jacket over his head as a shield from the rain, he approached me but I was already on the move. Fleeing from the cover, I proceeded to make my way home with a determined mobster following closely behind me.
"Mina." Damien called out for me, his hand gently tugging me back by my wrist once he closed the gap. "We need to talk." He spoke louder so I could hear him as the rain continued to hammer down on us.
I shook my head. "There's nothing to talk about!" I mirrored his tone, hoping to be heard despite how close we were now.
He had stepped closer, giving me shelter beneath his suit jacket which remained above his head. I shivered from the cold and the rain which was slowly soaking through my uniform.
The longer I stayed here, the higher my chances were of getting sick. "We have a lot to talk about Mina. Don't make this difficult."
I nervously gulped.
He was going to kill me.
"Look, just get in the car, so we can talk" he nodded his head over to his car. "Please? You can't be out in the rain like this." His eyes roamed over my attire momentarily which was not cut out for the weather today.
Or maybe he wasn't going to kill me..
"I'll take you home after." He added but I was still hesitant.
"You promise?!" The words slipped past my lips wearily. I received a nod in response before he spoke up again.
"You have my word."
Silent.
The drive to my apartment was a quiet one with me only speaking up to point out the directions to where I stayed.
I honestly expected him to start questioning me straight away after he opened the doors for me to enter but he hadn't.
I guess he wanted me to get comfortable first but that was proving to be futile. I was still very much on edge. My worries only eased by a fraction once I realised we had come to a stop just outside my apartment.
He kept his word, so I guess I had to keep mine.
"You saw." Were his first words which lingered in the air for a moment longer.
It was already too late to lie and it wasn't like I would be able to successfully get away with it.
"I did." I shakily replied, fiddling with my fingers.
He let out a heavy sigh, his hands now slipping from the steering wheel to rest on his lap. "How much did you see?" He asked, his gaze trained on the outside world as the rain continued to hammer on.
How each heavy droplet scaled down his windows, shielding us from prying eyes.
"Everything." I uttered, my voice a soft whisper now, stealing a glance over at him.
Silence once again washed over us and I was growing more and more nervous as each agonising second passed. I wanted him to speak up, to at least say something so I wouldn't have to be anxious anymore but he only stared outside, the sound of the heavy rain being the only thing to fill the silence.
"I-I didn't tell anyone what I saw. Nobody else knows and I swear I won't tell a soul—"
"You told me." He spoke out, turning to face me. "Why? You could've kept that a secret and taken it to the grave, so why'd you tell me?"
I gnawed down on my bottom lip, ringing my fingers together at his question. I wasn't even sure myself why I told him, I guess I knew he'd get the answer out of me eventually since I was keen on avoiding him like the plague.
"You would've found out eventually." I replied with a light sigh. There was no point stalling the inevitable. "And I guess a part of me believes you wouldn't..hurt me if I told you." I mumbled the latter, avoiding his heated gaze.
"How are you so sure?" His question made my heart pound within the confines of my chest.
"Would you?" I lifted my gaze up to hold his own, seeing his usual hard stare soften.
"I asked you a question first, answer that and I'll answer yours." He said.
I momentarily pondered on my reasoning.
"You apologised earlier on, assuming that I was avoiding you because of you almost.." I trailed off, shifting my gaze to his chest. "Kissing me."
"I don't think anyone with the intention to hurt another would apologise to them beforehand, especially if it's genuine.."
"You're right." He started and I internally felt relieved. "I wouldn't hurt you, Mina. I have no intention to and you shouldn't fear me for it." he firmly stated.
But I shook my head. "I can't help but to, Damien. I mean I saw you—" my sights hazed over as the image of Damien hovering over Paolo came to mind, drawing me from reality. "I saw you.." the words died on my tongue, unable to come out fully as I tried to steady my breathing.
"Mina." He tried to say but I finally got the words out.
"You killed someone, y-you took a life. You shouldn't have to take a life.." my moral compass remained intact for the most part but it was beginning to shift.
"It's kill or be killed—or would you have preferred if I was the one who died that night, tesoro?" My heart skipped a beat at the thought. "Would you?" He repeated, turning to face me.
I don't know why the thought of Damien dying in Paolo's place had my mind spiralling. I didn't want him to die, I didn't want anybody to die but like he said—it was kill or be killed. The latter would not be an option.
I gingerly shook my head.
"I need to hear words." He rasped and I felt my stomach turn with a flurry of butterflies. Why was my body betraying me still?
"No." I answered softly.
"Then you understand what needed to be done and why he needed to be taken care of. That's just how it is." He spoke. "You shouldn't have been there to see it in the first place. My mistake was taking him out in public, had it not been you that night at Loretta's it would've been someone else and that would've been a problem."
I could only imagine what would've taken place if it was Cori closing that night.
"Just a case of wrong time, wrong place." I chimed softly, once again diverting my gaze elsewhere.
"Maybe." He rasped and I coaxed myself to look up at him.
With what had happened I'd finally gotten the chance to take a glimpse at a side of Damien I knew nothing of—the side of him that was rumoured and spread around like folk tale, only it wasn't rumours, it was true.
Yet here I was. Strangely comfortable in his presence when I should've been the complete opposite. I didn't like how my body was betraying me, even my mind was falling into a gutter of attraction that I had yet to fully comprehend.
He was leaning in towards me now and my mind raced with possibilities. Would he kiss me this time? Would I actually let him after everything I'd witnessed? I was conflicted. This was a dangerous man that I was freely associating myself with and no part of me willing enough to leave seemed to be deterred by the idea.
Because you like him,
My mind taunted me with incredulous thoughts that were in fact true.
I shouldn't like him. I shouldn't be attracted to the likes of him and yet I was—though I wouldn't admit it yet. A sliver of me hoped that I'd gain sense in my desire for a criminal but that sliver of me was just that; a sliver that was practically non existent.
He was close to me. So close I could see the constellation of freckles aligned on his tanned skin, how they all seemed to tell a story like that of paint to a canvas.
His lips lifted up ever so slightly, his sharp eyes lowering to my own lips which had parted slightly before they shifted to the right of me. Then he leaned forward entirely, his hand reaching past me to latch onto the passenger door. "I'll leave you go now."
He didn't kiss me.
The deafening click of the door unlocking brought me out of my thoughts, my cheeks flush in embarrassment now.
Was this how he felt when he tried to kiss me and I avoided him? I figured so.
The feeling wasn't good. It wasn't good at all.
The next day
"So are you going to explain yourself?" I heard Cori's voice ring out as I pressed my phone between my ear and shoulder.
"No, I am not." I sniffled, reaching for another tissue as my little cold progressed. I was a sneezing mess after staying in the cold and rain so long yesterday and I regretted not getting into the warmth of Damien's car sooner.
Though, it wouldn't have saved me from the talking I was getting from both Cori and Melissa. News spread like wildfire that Damien had dropped me home yesterday and they were one of the few to hear.
After calling off my shift at Loretta's this morning, they didn't waste any time to call me after I didn't show up. Their first assumption being that Damien had..stayed over.
"I think he's there right now." Melissa chimed in and I could just picture the shit-eating grin on her beauteous face.
I rolled my eyes at her words. "No, he's not. Can't you hear how I sound?! He only dropped me off because of the rain and that was it." I explained myself, rising from the couch to go to the kitchen in search of a remedy. "If you don't believe me, you can come on over and see for yourself."
"I'd rather not catch whatever you have but I believe you." Cori grimaced. "So, tell us what happened in the car, I highly doubt it was a silent ride."
It was until we arrived at my doorstep.
"We just talked." I rolled my lips to the side as I scavenged through my cabinets. "Didn't really do anything."
"Mhm yeah.." Melissa hummed, not buying it. "That's totally what happened."
"It is!" I argued back, mixing myself a remedy that I vaguely remembered learning from my mother. At the thought of her I frowned.
I hadn't heard from her in some time—then again I hadn't heard from my parents in general. Pushing the thought of them to the back of my mind, I focused on my drink in hand.
"So what? No kiss, no flirting? Nothing?!" Cori spoke up, and I hummed in agreement.
"I told you guys, it was nothing—" as I past my windows, my gaze fell to a familiar car parked across the street.
How my heart hammered hard in my chest.
"She's quiet now." Cori teased.
He's here.
"What?!" Melissa shouted and I realised I'd said it out loud. "Who?! Damien?!" She guessed correctly.
There was no point in lying. "Yeah, I see his car parked across the street but I don't know if he's even in it." I peered outside again, now seeing him exit. "Yup it's him." I confirmed.
Could he look any more handsome..
The sound of Cori and Melissa's squeals were background noise as I focused my attention on him. Setting my phone down along with my drink on the window shelf, I found myself doing the unthinkable.
I opened the window.
His head lifted up as he crossed the street, his sights falling to me before he flashed me a half smile. "What're you doing on this side of town?" I asked him, leaning out the window to get a better look at him and similarly me.
He stopped at the pavement below, craning his neck back to look up. With his hands tucked into his slacks, he parted his lips to say, "I heard you were sick, so I wanted to check on you." He started off. "Should've gotten into my car sooner, tesoro."
"I don't think that would've made much of a difference." I shook my head with a shy smile. God why was I so comfortable? It was like yesterday's events were being completely disregarded. I was talking with a killer.
A killer with a kind smile.
"I'm okay. I just have the sniffles, it'll pass in a day or two." I added, lowering myself down onto my arms which rested against the window sill. "You didn't have to come and check on me, y'know."
"I know but I did anyway." He shrugged. "Shoot me." How ironic was his choice of words.
"I think that's your job." I quipped and he let out a low chuckle.
"She's laughing!" I heard Melissa shriek making me realise they could hear our conversation. "One second!" I called out to Damien who nodded.
Turning my attention to my phone as I pulled back into my apartment, I uttered. "I'll call you guys back!"
"No! Wait, we'll be quiet!" Cori protested but I was already ending the call, knowing they would be the complete opposite.
"Don't you have business to take care of?" I spoke up after returning to my window, seeing Damien once again. He ran a hand through his dark hair before resting it on the back of his neck all the while peering up at me. "Or police to avoid."
"Not today. I'm a free man." He replied. "I wanted to ask you something."
"Oh?" I lifted an eyebrow in question, leaning forward more. "What is it?"
Lowering his hand back to his side, he tucked it back into his pocket. "Go out with me."
"That wasn't really a question, it sounded like more of a statement." I quipped, tilting my head to the side.
"Well, it was both." He replied with a toothy grin. "Will you let me take you out? You can pick the day and I've got a place in mind that I think you'd like."
To go out on a date..
With a criminal.
Oh, how my moral compass was shifting.
"I'll think about it." I replied back fighting a smile of my own.
"You'll think about it?" He repeated, his grin widening slightly making my own broaden too.
I nodded. "That's what I said." I replied. "I'll think about it."
"So..it's a yes." I let out a laugh at his words, the sound making his eyes soften.
"I didn't say yes." I shook my head.
Shrugging his broad shoulders, he chimed in his raspy accented tone. "You didn't say no either."
"Maybe I will." I decided to play along, finding his ways amusing. I didn't believe it, I didn't believe how well our conversation was going solely because of who I was having it with.
In this instance he seemed normal—mundane. I knew that wasn't the case though.
"Say no then." He challenged me rather playfully, crossing his arms over his chest. I couldn't help but to admire him as he did so.
I lifted myself up now, resting my hands on the sill with my head still stuck outside as I continued to gaze down at the charming gangster below.
"No." I accepted his challenge, knowing I thought otherwise.
"No to the date or to saying no?" He caught me there and I found myself rolling my eyes, amused by it all.
"I'll think about it." I repeated myself for the last time, knowing I'd have to be the one to end our conversation for two reasons.
The first being the stares. So many people were looking at us now, some peering from their windows while others walked the streets. Even the cars who passed by had their windows rolled down in curiosity at the fact that the infamous Damien Moretti was conversing below the window of an outsider.
The second reason being that if we continued to talk, I'd find myself agreeing too soon and that agreement came hand in hand with the notion of letting him in.
"Goodbye Damien." My voice light as I gradually retreated back into my apartment.
He continued to gaze up at me, that charming grin still on his handsome face as he lifted a hand to slightly wave. "Goodbye Mina."
It had been three days since Damien had asked to take me out and I had yet to give him an answer, mainly because of how little I had seen him since then.
He was busier than usual but I figured it was because of the presence of the police in town. They weren't lying when they said they'd be keeping a close eye on Damien.
A number of police officers lingered around C's as well as Loretta's from time to time and I had the pleasure of dealing with them. Today was one of those days.
"I'd take the mobsters over those cops any day." Cori frowned as we observed the police officers sitting at the back tables from the kitchen.
It was a large group of them this time—about six or seven in total and all of them were in uniform. "You can say that again, cara mia.." Loretta muttered to herself, joining us in the kitchen after she returned from the store room. "They're ruining business for me."
Ever since the police began to frequent the places Damien and his men were known to hang about in, they'd stopped coming.
Of course money was still coming in, it just didn't compare to the amount that Damien's men used to pay.
The tips especially.
"Hey! We wanna order!" One shouted, drawing our attention.
Cori slowly whistled turning on her heels as she pretended not to hear while Loretta busied herself with a new order, leaving me.
"You're unbelievable." I tsked towards Cori who only grinned. Leaving the kitchen, I approached the first table of officers.
They were pleasant to deal with, not too rowdy or authoritative when ordering so I didn't mind taking their orders. However, the second table was an entirely different story.
Ordering food wasn't the only thing on their agenda. "Has the Moretti been around lately?" The darker haired man questioned me moments after I'd taken their order.
I shook my head, prepared to retreat but he had other plans. "What do you know about the Moretti?"
"Nothing." I shrugged, clutching onto my notepad a bit firmer. "I don't know anything."
He narrowed his sights. "You heard her, Pete. She doesn't know anything." The blonde taunted.
"That's what they all say." Pete chuckled wryly.
"I'll go get your orders." I tried to once again dismiss myself.
"Not so fast. What's the rush? We just wanna ask you a few questions." Pete frowned. "I mean you heard about what happened to Paolo Ricci, very tragic—right Jamie?"
"Very." His partner chimed in with a fake look of sympathy. "Gunned down like an animal right in front of the restaurant, it's a wonder nobody saw, or heard anything about it 'til he was found in a different town."
"Even more of a surprise that nobody knows who done it. Don't you find that interesting..Mina?" He lowered his gaze to my name tag before lifting it once more to meet my stare. "Don't you find it also scary that there could be a killer on the loose and nobody knows who it could be?"
"Who knows, the next victim could be you. I mean you work here." Pete continued to speak and I found myself growing more and more anxious. "But hey, you know nothing and neither do we. Apparently nobody does and that's nothing new but we'll be keeping a very very close eye on this..establishment."
"A very close eye." He emphasised, continuing to hold my stare with a gaze of suspicion.