"What's gotten you so happy all of a sudden?" NamJoon's voice rings to JungKook's ears snapping him away from his train of thought, or rather from another flash of his soulmate.
"Huh?" JungKook turns to look at him questioningly.
"You've been smiling with your eyes closed for a while now. What's up?" NamJoon asks, concerned over the boy who is has beamed so hard over the last three days he hasn't seen him like in the past three years, and they became Grammy Nominees.
The two are sitting alone in the kitchen, enjoying silence with each other- until NamJoon got too curious and asked that it. The other members have already left for their month-long vacation to be spent with whomever they wish. NamJoon and JungKook will be leaving tomorrow, yet the younger feels like he's finally home that she's returned to her rightful place in his mind.
It's so weird yet so nice having you back in here...You make it less lonely, were his thoughts the previous night while he stared up at the ceiling of his dark room. He'd just gotten another flash of her looking at herself in the mirror and smiling, even with the tear-stained cheeks and red-puffy eyes.
I don't know what you're going through, he thought as he closed his eyes while he recalled in his mind all the flashes from the previous two days. She'd been sitting in her bed or couch all day crying her eyes out but smiling from time to time. He was- and still is- very confused. But I'm grateful that I can at least see you and do something to help.
"My soulmate," JungKook tells NamJoon as he looks up at him with a genuine smile, "I can see her again."
NamJoon's eyes go wide to the news. The youngest had entrusted him with everything relating to his soulmate from the first time it happened. He did because he was sure the elder would understand. NamJoon is linked to his soulmate in a similar way, as well.
"Really?" NamJoon gasps and looks up from his cup of coffee in a split second, "How? When? Where?"
"Two days ago," JungKook responds softly, "After I posted the cover. She listened to it."
NamJoon's mouth hangs open and awe is written on his face and the soft gaze the younger has while he drifts off in a daze thinking of his soulmate once again. With a light shake of his head, JungKook returns to reality and he continues explaining to NamJoon,
"She wasn't okay, though. For the past three days, she's been crying and she's been smiling like she met her soulmate because of that. How weird is that?" JungKook tilts his head a little bit to the left in confusion while he blankly stares at this pink mug that has the design of his character, Cooky, from the BT21 series.
NamJoon hums in response- ignoring JungKook's reference to himself- and he rests his elbows on the table and joins his hands before he places his chin on them, "You said that you could see her whenever she was going through an emotion very intensely and then you just lost her, right?"
The young man eagerly nods his head giving a positive response to NamJoon who stays silent for another moment in process of his thoughts, "What if...she didn't go through any strong emotions in that time span?"
"What?" JungKook furrows his eyebrows.
"Your link was probably always there. Just...she couldn't trigger her emotions hard enough for you to feel her," NamJoon explains and the younger stays quiet to go through the theory in his mind, "People sometimes lose themselves and the connection to their emotions. They're there, alive and breathing, they have a soul that's experiencing, however, the soul can't transfer all that to the body and it's hard because a human consists of body and soul and the two need to be in synch so it's not easy when they're not..."
"I see," JungKook nods his head slowly, comprehending what his elder is trying to say.
"Your soulmate had probably lost that synchronization with her body and soul and apparently your cover worked like a bridge and now her body is catching up to her soul and she's going through all the emotions that she bottled up all these years," NamJoon finishes and he looks at JungKook who's eyes have turned reddish and tears are streaming down his cheeks.
"Aaah," a shaky breath leaves his mouth before he bites down on his lip to contain himself, yet that's impossible, "I couldn't have imagined she was going through something like that. I wish I would've been more helpful to her. Ah, I left her all alone-"
"It's not like that, don't blame yourself," NamJoon tells him with a calm voice and the younger shakes his head in disagreement, "Of course you've helped her, dummy. You not even once have stopped thinking about her to putting art out into the world with the sole purpose of it reaching her and if it hadn't been for you posting that cover she probably would've been like that for much longer."
"Yeah, but she's going through all that alone and I don't want her to be alone," JungKook retaliates wiping the tears away with his shirtsleeves.
"JungKook...," NamJoon's soft voice echoes and JungKook raises his eyes to make eye contact, "I know that it pains you to see your soulmate in such state maybe it's for the best that she goes through it alone. And if you think about it, she's not really alone, she has you through music and your link."
JungKook nods his head in understanding finally settling with the fact that all he can do is help her from distance like always, "Thank you, Hyung," he mumbles before he lets his head fall behind and his eyes focus on the ceiling, "Ah, I just wanna meet her already," he sighs.
"Yaaaah," NamJoon raises his voice before he slaps JungKook's hand that lies on the table, "You think I don't wanna meet my soulmate? I keep seeing her in my dreams but I never remember her face when I wake up. All I remember is a blur with red hair," he complains with a pout towards the and the younger falls in hysteric laughter as NamJoon tried to wave a fly that was bothering him away but he ended up knocking down his mug of coffee and spilling it everywhere.
"Your soulmate's going to have a hard time with you breaking stuff constantly, Hyung," JungKook's teases as he stands up to go to the bathroom and bring a mop to clean the mess NamJoon made on the floor.
He chuckles when he hears NamJoon ask the Gods why he had to be cursed with such destructive abilities as he opens the door to the bathroom. He closes his eyes for a split moment and he gets another flash of his soulmate,
"Jeon JungKook I hate you so much yet I'm so thankful for your existence," she mumbles to herself. He sees her standing outside on a balcony, a black house-robe wrapped around her to keep the morning cold of January from seeping into her body.
"She hates me?" JungKook furrows his eyebrows in confusion before he sighs in complaint, "Ah, what did I do wrong again?"
_____________________Tha Exact Moment______________________
"Jeon Jungkook, I hate you so much yet I'm so thankful for your existance," she mumbles to herself as she admires the city that's waking up right after the sun's rise, "I'm going to personally thank you for this one day."
She has kept listening to the song on repeat nonstop for the past three days. The amount of emotion she let out is indescribable. It was so painful she hated it but she had missed this process so much she couldn't help feeling bliss everytime she thought that finally, she could express her emotions. And it was all thanks to him.
She hadn't noticed until a few hours ago that for the past five and a half years, whenever she would need motivation, emotional support, or just someone to share a beautiful moment with Jeon JungKook would always show up in her screen; either posting a heartfelt message or a simple greeting, even going live on streaming apps such as Vlive and talking about subjects that she always found relation to.
Could it... She begins to wonder but doesn't even let herself finish the thought, No, no, that's impossible, She chuckles with a bittersweet feel.
There's no way. It's a mere coincidence, everyone goes through hard stuff and he's sending such messages out in the world that anyone can relate. I shouldn't get over my head.
"But I'm still thankful," she mutters wrapping the fuzzy robe tighter around her, "Whether it's just for me or for the entire world."
I won't let my self fall in this void again...But if I do I hope that you'll pull me out of it again.
And so she turns her back on the sun and walks back inside her apartment. She spins back to close the glass doors and pull the curtains back but she freezes once they block the view outside.
No...I want light.
She thinks and with fast moves opens the curtains again allowing the sunlight to enter her small and cold living room to warm it up like her heart felt warm for the first time in a long while.
With a genuine smile now on her face, she turns around and the feeling of calmness spreads from her chest to her entire body as she takes in the cozy vibe of her apartment now that it's not dark, but full of light.
That's right, I'll try to express my self from now on.
I promise my self and you JungKook.
I just wish I could be there for you as you are for me...yet that's impossible.
___To Be Continued___