Ya'll comment like that and I'll update everyday lmaoo. Here's your chapter.
I hope you guys comment alot cause mannn, it's hard to write 6k words.
I love you guys. Thank you for all the love
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Aaina x Zaydaan.
Words cut like knives. Words are unforgiving, cruel and harsh. You can't take them back once they have left your mouth, words. A few words and they can change your entire world, words.
Words cut like knives.
Words cut like knives.
And yours pierce my heart.
What could words protect you from?How could mere words do so much harm to your soul? How could they transform you, change you, change your entire life, change the way you look at things, how could words change it all?
Why do we give so much power to people that they can hurt us anytime they want to, with just their words?
Why do we not keep our hearts to our own selves? Why do we give it away to the ones who could shatter it with just their words?
He had rushed after her, a sudden unknown fear in his heart that he had never really felt before was there, a feeling of uneasiness was trapping him within himself, his senses felt numb and all he could do was rush after his wife.
The wife that had heard him talk about a second marriage and the wife who had left without uttering a single word.
He entered his bedroom in a sudden rush, looking around the dimly lit room, only to find his wife standing against the wall, more like leaning against it as some sort of support.
"Aaina," He whispered her name in the pin drop silence of the room and it echoed like it was the only name that mattered.
She didn't say anything but she opened her eyes, her eyes that were now red but not watery. Her eyes that were trying so hard to not let the tears fall, her eyes that were absolutely burning.
And her heart was burning with her eyes.
"Aaina." He took her name again and walked near her, looking at her like she was the only one that mattered.
Aaina looked away, she couldn't bare it all, she couldn't. Not anymore.
She wanted to run away, she wanted to leave, she just wanted to be alone.
"Uhh, I actually have to study so I'll be umm downstairs, I can't-" She rambled, not even knowing what she wanted to say, what she had to say.
Zaydaan sensed it, her fear, her shock, her hurt. He felt it.
"Aaina, look at me." He said it again, Aaina didn't look at him.
Her heart physically ached, it actually genuinely ached and she wanted to press on it, or rub it to make it feel better.
Look at me. He had said.
How can I look at you when all you do is hurt me? How can I look at you when my entire life could possibly get destroyed because of you? How can I look at you when I know that one look in your eyes and I would break down. I am tired of breaking down in front of you, I'm tired of showing you my weakness, I am tired of you hurting me, I am so tired of you not caring enough.
So many thoughts, so many words, unsaid.
"Just leave me alone, I have to-" She mumbled, speaking and then stopping.
She didn't know how to react. What could she do? Beg? Plead? Cry? Or unleash all the rage that she had within her? What could she do?
"Aaina," He said her name again.
She loved the way he would take her name but today, she loathed it.
She finally looked at him, eyes narrowed as she tried her hardest not to cry. Even Zaydaan seemed surprised at the sudden reaction by his wife who actually walked away from him before speaking out.
"What Zaydaan? Kya? Kya Aaina? Kya?!" She yelled.
She had never yelled at him before, infact, Zaydaan couldn't remember a time where she had yelled at anyone.
I want to shower all my rage on you, I want to scream at you and hit you, I want to yell at you, I want to tell you that I am good enough, I deserve to be loved, I deserve to be admired, I deserve to be the only one in your life, and if you can't do that, then I don't want to be in your life.
She wanted to say it all, all these words. But there was a battle going on, a battle that she was fighting within her self.
And before she could even ponder over it, the door opened without even a knock.
"Ahad, what the hell?" Zaydaan scowled at his brother, frowning even further when he saw the panicked look on his brother's face.
"I'm sorry bhai but Aaina's father is here to meet her." Ahad said as an excuse, leaving the door opened in his panicked state.
"What? How is that even -"
"Imran Uncle is waiting downstairs."
She had seen her father seven months ago, on the day of Zaydaan winning the elections. He hadn't even bothered to meet her before leaving Pakistan and now, he was back home.
No relationship is perfect but blood relations are there for a reason.
Maybe, this was gods plan for her. Maybe her father had realised his mistake, maybe her father could heal some of her wounds.
Aaina knew that his name wasn't on ECL anymore, he could leave and come back to the country at any time. Most of his cases had been disabled by NAB upon Zaydaan's request, something that he loathed.
Besides, Imran Sahab would never come back home if he didn't have a plan. Zaydaan already had so much going on, her father coming back was another headache that he did not want to have right now.
What was that betraying bastard doing here? How was he allowed to even enter the Prime Minister House?
Oh Ofcourse. The first Lady's father. Why wouldn't he be allowed?
Aaina, on the other side felt like her whole world was falling apart and maybe God had sent her father to protect her from it.
A thought that she wanted to dismiss the moment she had it.
How can I expect my husband to care when my own father did not care at all? How can I expect to be loved, cherished, admired when the one responsible for my birth just gave me away, knowing the reality.
Even though several thoughts passed around in her head, the memory of her father driving her home from school rushed in her mind.
No relationship is perfect but blood relations are there for a reason.
Maybe, this was gods plan for her. Maybe her father had realised his mistake, maybe her father could heal some of her wounds.
Without even thinking any further, Zaydaan saw his wife running downstairs.
He ran after her, seeing the way her hair moved from one side to another and how her dupatta almost stuck between her legs, making it seem like she might trip and fall.
But she didn't.
The usually calm and proper lady Aaina, rushed down the stairs, her eyes focused on her own father.
The same father who had kissed her forehead the first time he fell, the one who would yell at their mother but would speak softly when it came to them, the one who made them behave and taught them how to act proper, the one who did show love at times but also the one who forced her into a political alliance. And got nothing out of it.
"Aaina, wait!" She could hear Zaydaan yelling after her, but she didn't care.
"Abbu!" She called out after her father and he turned around to look at her.
Imran Sahab looked at his eldest daughter, seeing the way she rushed towards him and feeling the warmth of her body against his as she engulfed him into a hug.
And then, she broke.
She cried.
She cried as she hugged him, weeping out loud, not giving a damn about everyone around. Zaydaan's parents, Ahad and even her husband herself.
"Aaina!" He said her name in concern.
Yes, he cared about his daughter like any other man would and he even missed her at times, but that didn't mean that he could ignore other things.
Zaydaan Ziagil punished her, he punished for things that he did not even do, he punished him just because he had agreed to meet up with the chaudhry family, he punished him because he hid a few offshore companies from him, that was all?
Could he not ignore it? Could it not just move on?
First, he had him arrested and then he got him released, as if he could play with him and then give him his life back like charity.
It was enough that his family felt indebted to him, it was enough that his wife wanted to meet Aaina and ask for forgiveness but for him, this was not enough.
He wanted his name back, he wanted his business to flourish the way it always had flourished and he wanted to take away the daughter that Zaydaan Ziagil now cared about.
"Abbu!! You're here. What are you doing here?" Aaina finally asked him, not giving him any space to talk as she continued rambling and sobbing.
"Aap yahan? Kese hain aap, Saira theek hai na? Aur ammi? Kheryat hai na abbu?"
"What happened Imran Sahab, here to betray us again?" Zaydaan's father asked, taunting Aaina's father like anything, taunting the same man that he once considered his friend.
"I'm here to see my daughter." Aaina heard her father reply, he smiled at her, cupping her face.
"I missed her."
Aaina hugged him once again.
"You look so pale, abbu. Why didn't you meet me before you left? I know things were bad but I'm your daughter. Am I not?"
"I'm sorry, beta. You're okay, right? Khush ho tum?"
Khush.
Khush ho tum.
Kesa ajeeb sawaal hai Yeh?
Are you happy?
How can a person stay happy when life feels like its ending? How can a person stay happy when no matter how hard you try, you're just never good enough, how can a person stay happy when you don't get the love back that you give to a person so passionately?
Aaina knew her father didn't care much, that he was pretending to care, she wasn't stupid. But her heart did have a tinge of hope, a small gleam of it that her father did care.
So she told him what she felt.
"Nahi, abbu. Main khush nahi hoon. Main takleef main hoon."
She admitted, crying again.
Main takleef main hoon.
I am in pain.
Zaydaan flinched at the impact of her words but feigned a blank face.
One day before, she was happy. She was smiling and laughing, she was hugging him like he was her entire world, she was kissing him like his lips were the most incredible thing she had ever tasted. And today, she was in pain.
Mere words.
Words cut like knives.
She had once wrote to him. Maybe, she was right. Maybe, hearing his words had really broke her into pieces.
How could she just break like this, cry in front of everyone like this just because she heard his mere words?
And if she was allowed to cry over the love that he didn't even give to her, could she not understand that his heart might be hurting the same?
What were fifteen years compared to one single year?
Still, hearing her cry like that made his heart flutter in a way that he didn't understand.
"Ssh, bus. Chup. Why are you crying? What did you do to her?!!" Her father questioned, consoling Aaina, Zaydaan could see the Satan behind that concerned father facade, he knew her father's reality.
"Aaina, meri jaan, Mera bacha. I won't let you cry anymore, I'll take you away."
And here it was.
Maybe, he was ready to play another game by using his daughter as a pawn.
The last time he had used Aaina, Zaydaan was helpless too. But this time, he wouldn't let her father use her like an object.
"The Prime Minister be damned!" He heard Imran yell out loud, spitting at the sight of Zaydaan..
Maybe, he had grown some balls since he thought he could use Aaina as a shield but Zaydaan Ziagil still stood tall, arms crossed against his chest as he got ready to hear what Aaina's father had to say.
He saw the way Imran Sahab put a hand on her head, and she looked at him with eyes of an innocent dove who had no idea what to do.
Her cheeks puffy, nose red and eyes filled with tears. He saw the way his wife took deep breaths to stop herself from crying.
"You'll come with me, right? If you say yes, they can't make you stay against your will. I'll gather the opposition and make them all pay. He deserves to pay for hurting you.."
Zaydaan let out a dry chuckle at the way her own father was trying to fool her.
"Let's go back home, hmm?"
Zaydaan knew his Aaina would never leave this house, she wouldn't. He was confident about that.
"This is her home." Ahad interfered, standing in front of Zaydaan.
"Get out." He said next.
Ahad had never really looked so intimidating, but Imran Sahab had experience. He barely shrugged and his eyes caught a hold of Zaydaan.
"Home? I see the tears in her eyes and I realise I made the biggest mistake hy giving her to you!" He yelled at him.
Zaydaan gritted his teeth.
"You're her father, that's the only reason why I'm not getting you thrown out of this house." He responded, his father in law turned red in anger as he focused his attention back to his daughter.
"I'm not leaving without my daughter. Aaina, your ammi and saira are waiting for you. They love you, that's your home."
He said in the softest tone he could come up with, Aaina gulped looking at him and then back at Zaydaan.
"Don't worry about him, all you have to do is come with me. Awan Chaudhry will protect us."
Fuck Awan Chaudhry. Fuck that asshole. Fuck this bastard of a father. And fuck everyone who was making this so much hard on him.
Zaydaan cursed in his head as he waited for his wife to respond.
She hesitated, looking back and forth between her father and her husband.
Zaydaan couldn't believe his own eyes.
"You're seriously not considering this, are you Aaina?" Ahad inteferred one more time, asking Aaina in utter disbelief.
"Ahad, I-" She tried to explain herself but before she could do so, Zaydaan caught a hold of her hand and dragged her towards him.
She didn't understand what was going on but one minute she was standing there and in the other, she was being dragged to a room nearby.
"Bhai, what the hell!"
Ahad yelled after them but Zaydaan had already locked the door and was now looking at his wife.
She sighed and just sat on the sofa seat, too overwhelmed, too done.
Anger, disbelief, shock, fear.
Out of the many emotions that he was feeling right now, these four were the only ones he could actually understand.
He didn't understand how his wife could even think of just walking out like that?
How could anyone like Aaina choose to walk out?
"Dimagh theek hai tumhara ya main theek karun?"
He said the first words that came to his head, asking if her head was in the right place or not, he expected an apology, he expected her tears, he expected her to look at him with vulnerability.
Instead, he saw his wife looking at him like she could not believe him.
"Aap ka dimagh theek hai Zaydaan? Shayd Mera bhi kharab ho gaya hai aap ke sath reh reh kar."
(Is your brain in the right place, Zaydaan? Maybe mine has got damaged by staying with you.)
She said in response, his eyes rose at her crude reply.
How the fuck-?
"Excuse me? How dare you?!" He yelled at her, she winced, not saying anything.
She kept silent, knowing that there was no point. All she could do was sit down and contemplate on what the hell was going on in her life.
It felt like everything was going in slow motion and she was the damsel in distress.
It took a few more moments before Zaydaan yelled one more time at her.
"Aaina. You better not think of walking the fuck out on me." He warned, Aaina didn't say anything.
He waited for her to reply, to say something but she didn't.
"Ab bolo gi kuch?!" He yelled out loud, she looked at him with narrowed eyes.
"Kya bolun main?" She asked instead.
What did he want her to say? What did he expect from her?
"Tell your father you're not going anywhere. Can you not see that he's using you again?"
Zaydaan enquired, she let out a bitter laugh.
"Sab hi use karte hain, Zaydaan. Magar khoon ka rishta hai un ke sath."
"Aur humara rishta? Wo zyada important nahi hai?"
Ofcourse important hai. But is it important for you? It doesn't seem like it is. If it was important for you, you would have fought for us, you would have defended me, you wouldn't have called her yours and you would have thought about me before even thinking about willing to marry her.
"Main nahin jaanti." She said instead.
She was surprising Zaydaan today, she was truly surprising him. Every question answered was straightforward and detached.
He sat down by her side and made her turn to look at him.
Aaina looked away.
"Aaina,"
He said her name in a soft whisper and she visibly flinched, as if it hurt.
"Sab kuch hone ke baad bhi, aap us ko nahi bhula sake. Maine har tarah se koshish ki magar koi fayda nahi hua. Agar mai chali jaungi to aap ko fayda hoga, no? Raasta saaf."
She asked him, Zaydaan shook his head. She had no idea how wrong she was. She was his and his only.
His wife. His first lady. How could she even think like that?
"Idhar dekho, tum kahin nahi ja rahi. Are you listening to me? You are not going anywhere. You're my wife and even if you try to leave, I'll make sure that you stay."
He told her, Aaina looked at him straight in the eyes.
"What will you do?" She challenged.
I don't know what I'll do, I'll force you if I have to but I won't let you leave.
"Do you want to go, Aaina. Do you really want to leave, hmm?"
I don't. I don't want to leave you. I love you. It pains me that you don't love me.
It pains me.
Ofcourse I don't want to leave you. I've grown attached to you, so attached that this house is my home and you own my heart and soul.
She wiped a tear that leaked out of her eye.
"I have never been disrespectful to her, I have always tried to look at her with a nice perspective. I'm not stupid, Zaydaan. I get it."
She understood, she understood Minal's love and Zaydaan's too. But what about her love? Was it so meaningless?
"But that bloody woman, wo kameeni aurat, she knew that you'll never agree on letting your sworn enemy or your brother marry her."
"Aaina." He stopped her.
She didn't continue.
"I won't stay here and watch you bring someone else into your world." She said instead, telling him what she truly had on her mind.
Zaydaan shook her head and entwined her fingers with his, tightly.
"Tum meri biwi ho, humesha ke liye. Mujhe chor kar kese ja sakti ho? Pyaar nahi karti Mujh se?"
He asked next. It seemed like there was no one else on his mind or in his heart but Aaina. His eyes gave away the tenderness he held for her.
But Aaina knew, he had mastered the art of manipulation. He was a politician, he knew how to play with one's feelings.
So she asked him a question that she knew he couldn't fool her with.
"Aap pyaar karte ho, Zaydaan?"
She questioned, just as tenderly as he had. Zaydaan lowered his head, shaking it.
"Nahin karta, lekin tum ne kaha tha ke tumhara pyaar is rishte ke liye kaafi hai."
He reminded her. She didn't need to be reminded of that. She didn't need to be told what she had said. She had said those words with all the courage she had within herself but even those words were of no use.
"Mere liye to kaafi hai, lekin aap ke liye shayad kabhi bhi main kaafi na ho sakun."
She shot back, telling him that maybe her love was enough for her to carry this relationship but her love and her ownself, maybe that wouldn't be enough for Zaydaan.
Zaydaan knew she was hurt and she was angry but how could she even think of leaving with her father?
Her father, who wouldn't give a fuck before giving her away to someone like Awan Chaudhry.
"Mere beghair reh sakti ho, Aaina? Bol do apne baap ko, jis ne tumhain pehle bhi istemaal kiya tha aur ab phir kar raha hai, batao us ko ke tum kahin nahi jaogi."
He ordered, firmly, strictly. The kind of attitude that intimidated Aaina, scared her.
She didn't say anything.
"Meri biwi ho tum. Meri. Samajh arahi hai? Nahi ja rahi tum kahin bhi us aadmi ke sath." He said again.
Aaina let out a deep sigh.
"Aaina, that man is your father and he has done nothing but betray you. You really want to be used again?"
Did she?
Staying with Zaydaan was painful and going with her father would mean being used again by her own flesh and blood?
How do you make a choice? How can one make such an ugly choice?
Aaina stayed quiet yet again.
"Look, listen to me. Once he's gone, we can talk and we can sort all of this out." He tried to convince her, this was the most he had done in the past whole year, the most he had tried to talk to her, convinced her, explained to her.
"And you have seen the reality that is Awan chaudhry. Saaniya herself said that he will destroy us all. This is his plan, are you not smart enough to understand that?"
Ofcourse she knew. She knew her father was using her, but Zaydaan had hurt her so damn much.
"If your father truly loved you or truly cared for you, he wouldn't have done what he did." He continued, she remained silent.
"Atleast with me, you know that I might hurt you or I might not be the husband you've wanted me to be but I'll always defend you. Your father, he's just looking back to strike at me."
That was true. But it was false as well.
Because how can one have your best interests at heart when they're hurting you to the core? How can you destroy someone's soul when you care for them?
Zaydaan wasn't wrong, but he wasn't right either.
There was such a big reason to leave but there were other reasons to stay.
Maybe, Zaydaan-no. She had to stop it, she had to stop convincing herself that Zaydaan would change his mind or say sorry.
"Tell me I'm wrong, I'm not." Zaydaan asked her, she stood up, not saying anything.
He cupped her face and put his lips on her forehead, kissing her.
"Aaina, stay. Stay with me. You have to stay with me." He whispered, she took a deep breath and another tear left her eye.
He wiped it away.
"Come on, hold my hand."
She held his hand.
How can you comfort me and hurt me at the same time? Why Zaydaan Ziagil?
Why are you so heartless?
She walked back outside with her hand engulfed with her husband's. The same husband who had, just a few hours ago announced that he was going to marry the love of his life. The same husband who had hurt her so much but the same husband the chiefs still loved with all of her heart.
How could you love someone like that? She wanted to hate him but she was incapable of the feeling.
She looked at her father, who was already looking at her.
"Aaina, ready to leave?" He asked, as if it was that easy.
how was it so easy for him to tell her that she was going to marry the son of the prime Minister, how was it so easy for him to just use her like she was an object, how was it so easy for him to use her yet again, just to take revenge from her own husband.
How could men be so cruel and so demanding, how could men not understand that a woman hard a heart too, that she was not an object that they could use for their personal gains?
"No, abbu. I'm not leaving my home. I'm sorry." She said politely.
Imran Sahab looked at her with such an anger that Zaydaan wanted to smack his ugly face.
"This is not your home." He said out loud.
She looked around at people standing in the large Hall, a husband who hurt her and caused her pain, but a husband who she loved so much, A brother in law who had turned into a best friend, who cared for her and admired her, a father in law who was just as cunning as her own father, her mother in law who had shown her the kindness that her own mother hadn't ever since she got married to Zaydaan.
"Yes, it is. Home is where the heart is and my heart is here." She admitted, voice coming out shaky and unstable.
"My heart is with my husband, I can't leave him. My heart is with Ahad, who is my best friend, my heart is with Raima who has supported me in all my duties, my heart is with Sami bhai, who took a bullet for me, my heart is with Saleem uncle, who knows that I don't drink sweetened tea, my heart is with all the people of this large house."
She continued, crying as she admitted to her own self that there were reasons to leave but also reasons to stay.
"I'm someone here, I am not leaving."
Her father let out a loud laugh as he addressed the Prime Minister.
"How smart are you to manipulate her in ten minutes?" He asked, Zaydaan barely smirked.
"It's because of me that you have all this." Her father said, making her feel like whatever she had in this house was because of him.
No.
It's not.
I'm not stupid.
I'm not as stupid as you all think I am.
I am a person. I am not a toy.
"No. It's because of you that I've cried myself to sleep at times and it's because of me that I've turned this house to my home." She answered him.
She looked at Zaydaan for a moment as she continued speaking.
"I know that I might never be good enough for any of your games, I might not be as deceiving as you and I might be weak but I'm not going to let you use me as a leverage yet again."
She felt her father raise an eye as she turned around to stare at him.
"And what about him? He's using you too, is he not?" He questioned.
She gulped.
I know.
I know.
She let out another deep breath.
"I'm going to go upstairs, abbu. Just know that I love you with all of my heart, I hope that one day you love me back too." She told him.
"And I hope you love me like a daughter, not like a leverage for your personal gain."
She said, one last time and then ran upstairs.
The people you love, they hurt you the most.
The most
--
He could hear her loud sobs, the unflinching pain that caused him to not care that it was two at night.
She had helped him.
Protected him.
Took care of him.
How could he not do the same?
Especially when he could easily understand what the pain of love truly was.
Ahad knew that his heart was broken and it was going to heal after a very long time but Aaina was the only comfort that he had in past entire week, how could he not do the same for her?
He opened the door and found her sobbing, almost ready to fall out of bed.
He didn't dare to ask where Zaydaan was, or what he was doing at this time of the night, instead he focused on his friend.
"Hey,"
"Aaina."
Looking at Ahad, relief coursed through her veins.
Atleast there was someone that she could open up her heart to, someone she could cry with and someone she could actually trust.
"Why me, Ahad?" She asked him, eyes filled with tears. She had tried so hard to be strong but how can one be strong when everything is going against your wishes?
How can someone get toyed with and not break down?
"Why is it always me? I'm tired of all this, I'm so tired."
"I'm only human, I hurt too, what have I done to deserve all this?"
Ahad bit his lip and put his hand around her shoulders, pulling her in.
"You haven't done anything. I'll fix it okay? I'll talk to bhai."
He promised, She shook her head.
"You can't fix anything, Ahad. He thinks of her and he wants to marry her, how am I meant to compete with that? It's better if he just leaves me."
She admitted, still in pain, still in grief.
She didn't want to.
Nobody wants to cry in misery but sometimes, there's nothing else that you can do.
"Koi bhi nahi marta kisi ke baghair, dukh hota hai, takleef hoti hai, aap kabhi khush nahi reh sakte lekin aap zinda reh lete ho."
She murmured, Ahad clicked his tongue.
"You're our first lady, you're the Prime Minister's wife. You and you only!" He pointed at her.
He knew if he was in Aaina's position, he would have done the same.
She could not leave him like a normal wife could leave her husband. She was his wife, the Prime Minister's wife. Things would never go the way she wanted for them to go.
She had to make the best out of their circumstances. And she had to fight.
"No. That means nothing. This glamour means nothing." Aaina replied, trying to remove the damn tears but they wouldn't just leave.
"I'm nothing to him, after all this...I'm nothing."
She cried.
"No, no, no..stop crying." He tried to stop her, Aaina put her hand on his shoulder making him pull her close even tight.
They had never really hugged each other before, had never cried on each other's shoulders like this and yet, here they were.
Love brings people so much pain, and yet they just can't stop themselves.
"Thori si khushi chahiye thi mujhe, bus thori si..aur wo bhi nahi mil saki."
She weeped on his shoulder. Ahad stroked her hair.
"Aaina.."
"Why me, Ahad? All I wanted to be was loved."
"Me too, me too." He murmured over and over again.
He wanted to be loved too, without the betrayal, the pain, the hurt.
And it couldn't happen.
"You promised me that you'll fix things for me, I promise you the same." Ahad promised.
"You can't fix it because he'll never love me. And I can't force him to do so." She replied.
"You have to be patient and you need to have courage."
"What's the point? I don't want to fight for someone who is not even mine."
How could you fight for a person who didn't want you to fight for him?
Ahad realised that she was too emotional and too tired for any argument, so he just stroked her hair.
"Okay, but I'll fight for you. So just put your head on my shoulder and cry."
He whispered.
And so, she cried.
And when she finally went to sleep, he called his father and told him that he was ready to marry her.
Ahad Ziagil was ready to marry Minal Ashfaq. The consequences, be damned.
___
What do you think is gonna happen next?