"Where is he?" Y/n muttered under her breath as she waited for Peter at Isabels Cafe. She had texted him the details and hoped he would show up early. Why did I even agree to this? She asked herself as she watched the cars pass by in hopes of seeing him finally arrive.
As the minutes passed she fell deeper into the thought of what she had attempted just a couple of days ago. She started to think about how that would affect the world, her school, Isabel, and the people she would talk to. She started feeling guilty about her thought process at the moment of jumping. She just couldn't help herself at the thought of actually wanting to die, feeling off and tired she decided to lay her head down on the coffee table in hopes of dozing off.
Where could he be?
She was snapped out of her daze when she felt a tap on her head. She picked her head up and to her surprise, there Peter was. With an awkward smile, he sat down across from her, hanging his bag on the chair. He was excited although nervous she would chew him out being late. He helped some people on his way to the Cafe and simply lost track of time.
"Where were you...?" She asked with a hushed tone, almost as if she had woken up from a deep slumber. "I had to help my Aunt with some things and lost track of time... sorry" he muttered, looking at his lap in shame for leaving her hanging. She studied his features for a bit before perking up and sitting upright in her chair.
"Why did you want to hang out? Pity?" She looked him in the eyes, hoping to scare him a little. Peters's hands began to sweat the moment she looked at him, he felt his whole body heating up. He couldn't tell what he was feeling at the moment and hoped he wouldn't stutter whenever he decided to reply. "You okay? You seem very... nervous" she asked, a worried tone to her voice, leaning over the table she placed a hand on his forehead. "You seem fine..." she muttered while she sat back on her chair.
"Yeah... fine," he said, so quietly she almost didn't hear him. She started feeling herself heat up as she realized he was staring at her, she couldn't tell if she was flattered or ... weirded out.
"Hey man, you're acting kind of strange," She said with an awkward laugh. He didn't realize he was staring until he saw her fidget in her seat. He was infatuated with her. He hadn't felt this way in quite some time since his last crush didn't quite 'work out'. He wanted to place aside his attraction toward her considering he wanted to be her friend first.
"I just- uh- I don't know what to say..." he looked away, finally breaking the tension between them.
"Do you feel bad for me?"
"What?" He asked, looking at her, she was staring at him again. "Do you feel bad? Knowing someone in your class tried to commit suicide?" She asked once again, her voice remaining in a steady tone. He didn't think she would be straight up or non-emotional about it, she acted as if it had happened years ago.
"I do..." he muttered, "...but I also thought you were kind of cool" he spoke. Raising an eyebrow at him, she questioned what about herself did he find cool. He had never spoken to her unless she just couldn't remember. "What about me is cool?" She asked, almost annoyed someone found her 'cool'. She had such a confused face on her look that almsot made him giggle, she had never expressed herself so much to someone until today. She usually kept to herself as a way to move on and not think about things socially.
"The whole frisbee thing yesterday" He chuckled but she remained confused. Feeling he had said something wrong he almsot rushed to apologize.
"THAT?" She asked, pretty loudly that some people stared or looked around for the person who had spoken. Not caring, she continued to look at Peter for an answer. "To me, it's not really a big deal, it happens... I think" She was annoyed by how many times she was hit the day before, however it wasn't much of a big deal.
"Well, from what I heard you told her off, right?" He asked with a smile "I can't even remember if I ate breakfast today, so, I dont think I remember anything that I said yesterday" She relaxed, although it was an embarrassing moment she didn't want to think about it and the way Wendy would stare at her before, during and after class. "I just know I probably bothered that girl... dont know how though" Y/n crossed her arms and looked off at the traffic again.
"Hey," he started, making her drift her attention towards him again "didn't spiderman save you?" he asked, he felt ashamed for trying to make it about him but she didn't know that. She nodded, her face had a look of disgust to it, he felt a pang in his heart. Had he done something wrong?
"He was.. ok, he said something that really irked me" She spoke, he felt his stomach turn and flip. He thought he had screwed up and she would see right through him "He said something like, you're so pretty dont die haha" she mimicked, trying to be funny and not be serious. He breathed out a fake laugh wondering what about that was funny.
"Maybe he meant that you were like, too pretty to die or like... Why would such a pretty girl want to like, die, you know?" He tried sounding as friendly as possible as she seemed very chill on the subject of her attempt. However, his tone seemed very familiar to her, the words Peter had said were very similar to what Spider-Man had told her.
"I-I mean he seems like a pretty cool guy and you're like, very, pretty" he shuffled in his seat, wishing he had stayed home as she looked like she was catching on. "Do you like... like me?" She asked, he felt his face flush red in that instant. His whole body heat up and his hands sweat profusely. He felt like he was going to melt at that moment.
He admitted he was attracted to her, but he didn't know her enough to have a crush on her. He felt so nervous he felt like he had been caught red-handed. His head was spiraling with so many thoughts he almost forgot to speak. Y/n, on the other hand, felt her face heat up and hoped he wouldn't notice if she shuffled or seemed nervous. She had never really had anyone like her or be bold in the way he was when he had asked her to hang out. Part of her hoped he said no, it would make things go faster and easier.
"I mean you're pretty cool! I want to be your friend, not-not make you uncomfortable... I-I wouldn't... no" he straightened himself as much as the table and chair let him, "You see, when I was younger some people would pretend to want to hang out with me then get frustrated when they realize how I really... am," she said, looking at off, feeling ashamed of her vision.
"How different can you be? You seem perfectly fine" He genuinely meant it, but also didn't want to seem like a creep that already knew what was wrong. "Promise you won't tell anyone?" She spoke after a bride pause, she looked at him while holding her pinky finger up on the table, he quickly intertwined his pinky with hers, her hands felt warm against his and soft. He almsot didn't want to let go of her.
She pulled herself closer to him, he could almsot see every feature on her face perfectly from how close she was. He felt himself get nervous at her proximity, "Im colorblind" she spoke and sat back down, losing connection with his pinky. "That's it?" he asked as he looked at his pinky momentarily before placing his hand on his thigh, where it was before. Her eyes widened at his words, she felt her heart sink, she was interpreting it as him saying he thought it was lame or worse, that he was going to make fun of her.
He was surprised upon looking at her. She seemed like a child, with wide eyes, tears pooling at the corner of her eyes. Lips slightly parted, he panicked and went to reassure her of what he meant. They laughed it off a bit and continued to speak for some more. He got to know more about her and her personality. Despite being bold and brash, she was quite emotional and sensitive but tried to keep that to herself.
They both spend a good portion of the day hanging out, talking, getting to know each other, and sharing their lives with each other. They walked to food stands, took a walk in a park, and even took pictures with each other for fun. The day was passing by so fast that they didn't notice when the sun started to set. The only moment when they actually started to part ways was when Peter got a call from his aunt asking where he was. Y/n felt ashamed and sorry for having taken up his time but he reminded her he was the one who invited her to hang out.
As he went home he realized how much her attitude changed from when they first started talking at the Cafe to when they had to part. She was defensive and straightforward, but as the day progressed she opened up and seemed dot have a softer, goofy, and 'cute' personality. He felt butterflies at the thought of being able to see her again, he knew he would end up having a crush on her if things continued this way.
Y/n on the other hand wasn't so sure herself. She enjoyed the day with him but she didn't know if she liked him. It had been a while since she had a friend and felt she was confused between platonically liking him or romantically liking him. She really wanted a friend, and she had been wanting one for a long time. Someone to go out with, talk to about life, school, and just someone who could be there for her. She knew that's also what relationships were but was aware of the difference between the two, she knew if she lead him with the intention of just being friends, it would result in things falling apart.
-
"Wow, you've never asked me for this type of advice before..." Isabel smiled, as she sat on the couch with Y/n huddled up in one corner with a blanket wrapped around her. She felt ashamed having to ask Isabel for 'boy' advice. When she noticed people starting to date in middle school she told herself she would never do that, and that she would never ask anybody, not even Isabel for advice. But, here she was.
"I just dont know!" Y/n groaned and laid more into the couch, wanting to disappear. She had been feeling confused and, considering she doesn't talk to anyone, she didn't know who else to trust. "Like- I've wanted a friend for so long and he has all of that! We spend time together, text, a lot of things and I love it... but those are also things couples do, and... and I think he likes me..." Y/n looked over at Isabel for something, for her to say something. She was basically pleading with the way her eyes looked, Isabel sighed and placed a hand on her head.
"You don't need to date him or have romantic feelings," she said with a warm smile. "If you're not ready dont force it, if you're unsure- push it aside for a bit, you'll eventually know how you feel... i-its just something you'll know, you know?" Isabel tried to advise her as much as she could, she wanted Y/n to live every aspect of the life of a teenager.
"I just- he's cool and all, but like... god, I dont know!" Y/n groaned again and threw herself back "Do you know any of his friends?" Isabel asked, Y/n shook her head "Should I just tell him I want to be friends for now? C-Cause I think he likes me..." She whispered the last part, Isabel pulled Y/n forward by her hands so that they would face each other.
"Do you like him?" She asked, Y/n felt her body and face heat, the thought of being with him romantically flustered her and made her feel warm and nervous. She liked him she knew that, but she didn't know how to place, her feelings, into words. Isabel only chuckled at Y/n's fumbling to find the words, "It's okay, dont worry, just take your time and tell him that" Isabel said with a smile so hard her cheeks started to ache.
——
They had been hanging out for a couple of weeks now, she noticed Y/n was more lively and excited. Isabel knew this was an exciting time for Y/n but she couldn't help but feel scared for her, what if he is only pretending? She didn't want to witness Y/n go through another depressive Rut over a boy. If anything, she was glad Y/n asked for advice.
"He invited me to dinner at his house tomorrow..." Y/n whispered, hoping Isabel wouldn't hear. Peaking through a slit in the blanket she, Y/n, looked at Isabel who was frozen in place. She has cared something could happen to her if she were to go over, she was very worried- she had been very wary of everything Y/n asked to do, considering her attempt weeks ago. She faced Y/n with a warm smile, "Is it just going to be him?" she asked, Y/n shook her head and uncovered herself from the blanket.
"His aunt offered to cook dinner..." She said shyly but maintaining eye contact with her. Isabel sighed and looked up, almsot asking for help. "Be careful... please, AND talk to him about how you feel, give yourself some time" Isabel brought Y/n in for a hug. Although Y/n was not hers biologically she couldn't help but treat her as her own, she worried so much for Y/n and felt guilty she didn't try to help her further weeks ago. But now, she wanted to be there for every moment and push work aside no matter what.