// I added the second half of the chapter, check it out //
From Harry: Are you awake?
I furrowed my eyebrows at the text that had suddenly appeared on the lock screen of my phone. It wasn't like Harry to text me at half past midnight. A slight worry came over me as I tried to think of a reason why he'd asked such a thing, and I picked the phone up, unlocking it quickly and typing in a reply.
To Harry: I am
I stared at it for a couple of seconds, wondering if I should've asked the reason behind his question, but knowing Harry, I knew for a fact that he wouldn't have replied, so it seemed kind of pointless to do so. I sighed, sending it and staring at the screen, a surprised look in my eyes when I saw the three dots appear just a matter of seconds after. I put the phone down, but I kept it unlocked, waiting for his reply, that came not too long after.
From Harry: Can you come to the door?
I widened my eyes as soon as I read what he'd sent. Harry was outside my house? I slowly sat up, taking the hoodie that had been forgotten over my white couch and putting it over my long sleeved shirt before quietly opening the door of my bedroom, my fingers tightly wrapped around my phone. I tiptoed down the stairs, careful not to make a single sound not to wake anybody up, taking a deep breath when I finally reached the ground floor.
I turned the flashlight of my phone on just in time not to crash against a misplaced pair of shoes, and made my way towards the front door, slowly opening it when I reached it.
In the dim light of the moon I was able to see Harry's figure, that was leaning against the wall next to the door, evidently waiting for me to open the door. He looked up as soon as he heard the sound of the front door being opened, and I gave him a shy look in return, while I tried to understand if something was wrong. The only other time he'd come to my house in the middle of the night he'd been drunk, and I couldn't help but wonder if that was the case again.
"Harry? What are you doing here?" I whispered to him, confusion laced in my words as I kept my gaze on him, trying to make sense of the situation, a slight nervousness making its way through me as I took in the possibility of him not being in his right mind in that moment. I'd managed to get away with him sleeping his drunkenness away in my bedroom once, but I was quite sure I wouldn't have managed to do it twice.
He gave me a little shrug, detaching his back from the wall, his balance not faltering as he slid his phone back into his pocket. "You said I could come" he said quietly, understanding that he had to be silent from my hushed tone, a hint of hesitation in his voice.
I stared at him for a couple of seconds, trying to wonder what he was on about, before the conversation we'd had before Christmas flashed back to me. "Yes, of course" I said, uncertainty in my voice. If I had to be honest, I would've never expected Harry to actually come to me, instead of going out to get drunk. I couldn't possibly be that great of a distraction, could I?
"Wanna come in?" I asked all of sudden, realising just in that moment that I'd been staring at him in silence, not making a move to actually invite him in.
He nodded, and I stepped to the side, a little shiver running down my spine when he walked inside, taking a bit of the cold air of winter with him.
"Take off your shoes, and be quiet" I whispered to him, shutting the door and observing him as he did as I asked. "My parents are sleeping" I added, trying to justify my odd request, even though I was quite sure he'd already understood that.
When he was done I turned on the flashlight again, and we made our way upstairs in the deep silence of the house.
I took a deep breath when we finally arrived into my room, relief washing through me almost instantly. I closed the door and turned around, glancing at Harry. He was sitting down on my bed, looking at me, seeming even more silent than usual. I wondered if something bad had happened again, or if he was just having a bad moment.
"Have you been at the gym until now?" I asked him gently, slowly walking towards him and sitting down next to him, giving him a side-glance as I tried to assess the situation at best and figure out what he needed from me. I really did wish he'd be more open sometimes, for I had no idea of what to do in a similar situation. Should I have asked him if something had happened, should I have just held him, or even, should I have talked about something else to try to distract him? I had no idea.
He shrugged, looking down at my wooden floor. "It closed at eight. I drove around a bit, came here" he simply replied, making me understand that he wasn't willing to talk about it at all.
I furrowed my eyebrows at his reply. What could've possibly been on his mind, that he'd felt the need to drive around the city for hours, with no apparent destination? It was weird to think of Harry doing such a thing. He almost seemed... lost. I would've never thought such an adjective could be applied to him. "Have you had dinner?" I asked him, quickly changing topic, glancing down at Harry's hands as I spoke.
He passed his thumb over his middle finger, seeming to twirl an imaginary ring, quickly stopping his action when he realised that he wasn't wearing his usual jewellery. "I'm not hungry" he replied lowly, giving the same reply he'd given me when we'd last been in that same situation. He looked up at me as soon as he spoke, almost daring me to reply to his words.
"You've been at the gym for the whole afternoon" I simply stated quietly, giving him an attentive glance as I tried to grasp how he could possibly not be hungry after something like that. I really didn't understand him, sometimes.
He sighed at my insistence, looking straight ahead at the empty white couch in front of him as he thought of what he should've replied. "I can never eat when I'm stressed" he said in the end, the tone of his voice quiet.
"You've been stressed a lot lately" I replied quickly, realising what my words implied as I spoke. Ever since Niall's father had found drugs into the pocket of Harry's coat, his life had turned into a whirlwind of arguments with almost everyone he knew, which I knew must had caused a lot of stress to him. Did it mean that he hadn't been eating properly for over three weeks? Or was it only when he was particularly nervous? I kind of understood when he was coming from, if I had to be honest. I couldn't eat when I was stressed as well, it only made me feel sick. But I rarely was stressed enough for it to affect my eating habits. If Harry had turned it into a regular thing, I was positive it wouldn't have done him any good. "Stay here" I whispered, standing up and tiptoeing out of the door, taking my phone from the nightstand as I walked by.
I silently made my way down the stairs in the white light coming from my phone, quietly making my way to the kitchen when I arrived to the ground floor. I carefully shut the door, before turning on the light and putting my phone on the table, looking around and hoping to find something that Harry could've eaten without risking to feel sick.
I smiled a little when my eyes landed on the basket of fruit on the counter. I stepped towards it and took one of the apples on top, washing it quickly and as quietly as possible before taking a knife and cutting it in pieces, attentively taking a clean plate out of the cupboard and putting them on it.
Once I was done, I took the dish from the counter and my phone from the table, walking out of the room and turning off the light before making my way upstairs again.
When I entered my room, Harry was in the exact same position I'd left him in. He looked up as I closed the door, giving me a confused look when he saw what I was holding.
I put the dish next to him before sitting at the very end of the bed, giving him a little glance. "Take your time" I whispered to him, feeling the need to explain my actions. "I understand that you'd feel sick if you ate while you're nervous, but you can't just... not eat. It's not good for you."
"Thank you" he murmured in reply making me blush slightly, taking a piece of apple from the plate and starting to eat it, his gaze drifted to the window behind me, even though it was shut. "What are you doing tomorrow?" He asked after some seconds we spent in silence, in which he finished the piece of apple and started another.
I furrowed my eyebrows at the odd question. "Why?" I asked hesitantly, not having expected him to ask such a thing. He'd sometimes asked if I was busy, but he'd never asked if I had any plans in advance. It was weird to think that Harry actually was there, sitting on my bed, asking about my New Year's Eve plans while eating an apple.
He gave me a little shrug, looking down at the plate between us. "It's the last day of the year. Niall is throwing a party because his parents won't be at home" he explained quickly, keeping the tone of his voice low. "I was wondering if you'd like to come."
I pursed my lips, thinking of his request. The remembrance of what had happened the last time I'd gone to a party with him was still fresh in my mind, not making me feel particularly eager to say yes. "Parties aren't really my kind of thing" I replied, glancing down, not wanting him to see in my eyes what I was thinking about.
"I promise I won't get high, or drunk" he said, surprising me.
My head snapped up at his words. I hadn't expected him to catch on so quickly, to be honest. "I'd have to ask my parents. I suppose I could" I gave in, knowing that it was almost impossible to say no to him. I let out a little sigh, glancing at the time on the alarm clock that was over my nightstand and discovering that it was past one in the morning. "Do you want to sleep here?" I asked quietly, looking at Harry as I spoke.
He shifted his gaze from the window to me. "Would it be a bother?" He asked back, seeming a bit unsure about the whole thing.
I shook my head. "It wouldn't" I replied, even though I was quite sure my mother would've ended me if she'd found a boy sleeping in my bed.
He gave me a slight nod, taking in my words. "I'd like to, then."
"Alright" I said, standing up quickly and taking the empty dish, putting it on my desk, not feeling like bringing it downstairs that night. "I should have a spare toothbrush somewhere" I murmured to myself, checking into the drawers under my desk and quickly managing to find a new one, still in the wrapper. "Here" I said, throwing it on the bed, not missing the confused glance Harry gave me. "I experimented with different kind of brushes and charcoal some years ago. Don't ask. It's new though." I stopped talking, catching my breath after my little rant. "You know where the bathroom is."
He gave me a slight nod, taking the toothbrush and exiting the room without saying a word.
I sighed, hoping that he wasn't judging me too severely in that moment, and took off my hoodie, straightening the shirt underneath a little bit, before walking closer to the bed and turning around the pillow. I took my phone and put it to charge in the corner of my room, before taking Harry's shoes and putting them at the end of the bed. I finally sat back down on my bed, waiting for Harry to come back, which he did a few minutes after.
"Is it fine if I take off my jeans?" He asked as he closed the door, side-glancing at me, the slightest hint of hesitance in his voice.
I widened my eyes, feeling my cheeks get warmer at the thought of him in boxers. "Uh, sure. I don't have a spare shirt or anything though" I said, desperately wishing I did have something he could've changed into. I was positive that night would've been the end of me, if he'd gone to sleep shirtless as well.
"I do" he replied, walking to the gym bag he'd left on the side of my room and taking a grey t-shirt out. "I was supposed to use it at the gym but I decided to go shirtless, it's clean" he simply said in reply to the little glance I gave him, and I nodded, turning around to search for the key to my room in the drawer of the nightstand as he got undressed.
I found it quickly, my fingers wrapping around the cold metal in a fast move, but I stayed still until I couldn't hear the sound of fabric anymore. When I deemed it safe, I turned around, discovering that Harry was standing in the middle of my room in only his black boxers and grey t-shirt. I turned my gaze fast, locking the door of my bedroom to make sure nobody would've got in under his attentive stare, before slowly turning around again.
We looked at each other for a couple of seconds in the light coming from the lamp on my nightstand, in silence.
"We should go to sleep" I said quietly, walking towards the bed and sliding in under the blankets before I could rethink it, and Harry followed me shortly after.
I pushed myself against the wall a bit more, feeling pretty sure that I wouldn't have survived the night if we'd ended up touching somehow. He said goodnight, turning around to turn off the lamp, and I said it back as darkness suddenly filled the room.
I stared ahead for a few minutes, my eyes slowly adapting to the change of light and allowing me to see Harry's profile next to me, slowly coming to terms with the fact that Harry really was in my bed, before turning around and closing my eyes, finally drifting off to sleep.
I woke up a couple of hours later when I felt the bed slightly move under me.
I carefully turned around, discovering that Harry was in the same position of before. I furrowed my eyebrows, observing his profile in the almost complete darkness, listening to his shallow breathing. It was hard to tell for sure, but he didn't seem to be sleeping. "Harry? Are you awake?" I asked in a whisper, the slight tilt of his head in my direction proving me that I was indeed right. "Why are you awake?"
He let out a deep sigh at my question. "I just dreamt of something" he replied, as quietly as I'd first spoken. "It's fine, go back to sleep" he added fast, pushing the conversation away before it could even start.
"What did you dream of?" I whispered back, my voice laced with sleep, changing my position to look at him better.
He shook his head lightly. "I don't want to talk about it" he said, the tone of his voice short, but soft at the same time.
"Okay" I said, giving him a little nod, even though I was pretty sure he wasn't looking at me. We stayed in silent for a couple of minutes before I could finally find the courage to slide closer to him, wrapping my arm around his middle and putting my head in the crook of his neck.
"What are you doing?" He asked, his words making his throat tremble slightly against my lips as I left a little kiss on his skin.
I hummed in reply. "I'm trying to comfort you" I whispered to him, adjusting my body against his before closing my eyes again.
• • •
I woke up to a thin ray of light peeking through my slightly opened curtains. I sat up, the blankets falling around my waist, discovering that Harry was still asleep next to me, his curls a dark mess over the white of my pillow, his pink lips slightly parted.
I smiled at the calmness of the moment, but I was suddenly distracted when I heard a sound coming from downstairs. I pursed my lips, sending Harry a fast glance to make sure he hadn't woken up before carefully sliding out of the blankets and making my way towards the end of the bed, meticulously avoiding his shoes as I stood up and tiptoed in the direction of the window, quickly closing the curtains to make sure the sunlight wouldn't have interrupted Harry's sleep.
I reached the door and turned the key, unlocking it and sliding out before locking it again, taking the key with me as I made my way down the stairs. I peeked into the kitchen, happily discovering that it was empty, and entered it, discovering that my mother had already heated up the water for my tea. I poured myself a cup and put the tea bag in, leaning against the counter in silence as I started to think of how I could've made sure my parents wouldn't have found out Harry had spent the night in my bed.
After a while I drank the tea as fast as I could without risking to burn myself and I washed the cup, drying it and putting it back in its place before taking another and pouring more heated water in it, quickly dumping a tea bag inside.
"Oh, you're awake" a voice said behind me, and I turned around quickly, discovering that my mother had entered the room.
"Yeah" I said, taking the cup that was meant for Harry with both hands, warming my fingers up as I glanced at her, my heart beating fast in my chest.
She nodded. "Listen, I was thinking if you wanted to go out and have a walk or go shopping with me this morning? Considering that tomorrow is the last of the year."
"Uh, I'm still busy with that project, so..." I said, trying to come up with the most believable excuse not to say yes, a bell going off in my head when a sudden idea flashed through my mind. "You could ask dad, though?"
"You know what, that's actually a good idea" she replied, disappearing in the living room.
I didn't move a muscle as I heard the faint sound of words being spoken in the other room, waiting to know what my father's response would've been, the tea starting to lose its warmth in my hand. I took the tea bag out and threw it away, my heart skipping a beat when I turned around and saw my mother in the entrance of the room.
"He said yes, so I guess we'll leave in a few minutes" she said, and I nodded. "Are you sure you don't want to come though?" She asked again, giving me a slightly saddened glance.
I gave her what I hoped was a little defeated smile. "I'm sorry, but you know how important that project is" I replied, feeling a little bad for the lie. "By the way, I was wondering if I could ask you something?" I said suddenly, remembering the conversation I'd had with Harry during the night.
"What is it?" She asked, giving me a little nod.
"Well, tomorrow is New Year's Eve and one of my friends is throwing a party? His name is Niall" I said quickly, looking down as I spoke, not wanting to find out how she would've reacted, putting the cup of tea on the counter. "I was wondering if I could go?"
"Finally" she replied, and I glanced up quickly at the weird reply.
I gave her a puzzled look, wondering if I'd heard wrong. "What?"
"I said, finally. Honestly Sierra, you're eighteen. Of course you can go to a New Year's Eve party. Just be careful, and tell whoever felt sick the last time you went to be careful too" she simply replied before turning around and leaving the kitchen, leaving me to stare after her with a shocked look on my face. I would've never expected that conversation to take such a turn. "By the way" my mum said from the hallway, "we're leaving now. So bye, we'll see you later today."
"Bye" I said faintly, not moving an inch until I heard the front door get shut. I took a deep breath when the sound resonated in the house, not believing that I'd managed to get away with it for a second time.
I touched the cup, making sure it was still warm, before taking it and carefully making my way up the stairs. I reached the door to my room and I took out the key, quickly unlocking it before stepping inside and putting the cup on the nightstand.
Harry had seemed to be still asleep, but he scrunched up his nose at the faint sound, letting out a little whine as he turned to his side, blinking a couple of times as he slowly woke up.
"What do you want for breakfast?" I said gently, walking towards the window and opening the curtains a bit, allowing some light to come inside, but making sure it wouldn't have hit the bed.
He shrugged, sitting up and passing his hand through his dark hair, pushing it back. "I'm not hungry" he mumbled, making me turn fast towards him. "I never eat in the morning" he added, noticing the look I'd given him.
I furrowed my eyebrows, not exactly liking the reply - especially after what he'd told me the night before. "Why?" I asked quietly, walking towards the bed and sitting at the end of it.
He gave me another little shrug, playing it off as if it wasn't a big deal - and it wouldn't have been, if it wasn't that he'd said almost the same thing the night before. "I used to be hungover almost every morning a couple of years ago, I never had breakfast. I'm not used to it now, I'd feel sick" he explained, covering his mouth as a little yawn left his lips.
I nodded, accepting his explanation. "Alright" I said, letting my gaze drift off to the cup of tea that was still on the nightstand. "Is tea fine though?"
"It is" he replied, turning his head to see the cup on the nightstand. "I need to use the bathroom first, though."
"You can go, my parents left" I said, and he nodded, standing up and leaving the room quickly.
I sighed, putting my feet up on the bed and staring at my couch as I waited, wishing I could know what was going on in Harry's head in that moment. I didn't know if he knew what a dangerous turn his actions could take, to be honest, I didn't even know if there was more to it, or if it was really just as harmless as he'd played it out to be.
After a while he came back and sat on the bed next to me, taking the cup of tea from the nightstand and sipping it lightly. "Thank you" he said quietly, sending me a little glance, and I nodded.
"You're welcome."
We stayed in silence as he finished drinking, the sound of the cup being put back down on the nightstand almost coming as a surprise to me.
"I have to go, I don't want to enrage Niall's parents any further" he said, standing up and sliding the grey t-shirt off from his head before I could even realise what was happening.
I widened my eyes, a slight blush creeping up my cheeks as he quickly folded it and bent down to put it back inside his gym bag. He straightened himself up, turning his head to glance at me from over his shoulder, a little smirk finding its way on his lips at my reaction, making his dimples appear.
I glanced down, my gaze falling over his long legs as he turned around again, taking his jeans and putting them on quickly before doing the same for the rest of the clothes he was wearing the day before.
He turned around, giving me a little glance. "Thank you for last night" he said quietly, taking his black coat and putting it on.
I nodded in reply, watching him silently as he took the gym bag from the floor and swung the strap over his shoulder in a quick move.
"Goodbye" he said, not waiting for me to reply before walking out of the room.
"Bye" I said faintly, glancing in the direction of the door as I spoke. I widened my eyes, standing up quickly and rushing out of the room as I suddenly remembered the conversation I'd had with my mother. "Harry!" I called him as I made my way down the stairs as quickly as I could, managing to stop him as he was opening the door.
He turned around, giving me a confused glance, not a word leaving his lips.
"My mum said I can" I said from where I was standing at the bottom of the stairs, leaning against the handrail as I tried to catch my breath after the little run.
The corners of his lips slightly turned up at my words. "Good" he simply said, before turning around again and walking out of my house.
ARTWORK IS #1 IN FANFICTION?!! Is this a dream or reality? Thank you so so much! It means the absolute world to me.
I've already said it on my message board, but I'll say it here as well in case somebody isn't following me. I'll be very busy in this period because of my exams, so I'll post shorter chapters for a while (I figured it'd be better than just not posting for a month).
That being said, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! x
Miki