Rosé
Oh boy, it's raining a lot.
I can't believe I forgot my umbrella. The sky is twilight black and the wind is so cold. There's going to be a storm tonight in West Hampton Lake and I knew that yet my dumbass walked out of the safety of my house. I had to. My birth control pills finished this morning so I had to grab my new prescription from my OBGYN.
There's heavy traffic because of the rain and I'm thankful for that because I hate walking on empty streets. I'm twenty minutes away from my house and the moment I get home, I'm taking a hot shower, changing into my warm pajamas, and snuggling in my bed with Binx. Rainstorms, unlike thunderstorms, are comforting, especially when I'm reading a book.
And now I wish I took that copy of Lolita so I could've read it tonight.
Whatever.
It's been two days since I shoved that book in his chest and his words tugging on my heartstrings in the most heartwrenching way possible.
I can't wait to hug you once this is all over.
He said it so softly and with a bittersweet feeling as if he's been yearning to hug me for years. I felt his desperation and longing in my heart. All I wanted to do was turn around and run into his arms and forget about everything. I wanted to rewrite our last chapter but that's being naïve and ignorant about what he did.
I can't bear to let another man hurt me. I can't bear to break again.
A loud horn from behind scares me. With intentions to glare at the idiot, I turn around but all thoughts fizzle out the moment I spot Daniel in his car.
"Rosé, get in the car." He hollers from his open window.
"No." I say loud enough before turning around and continuing my walk home.
But I hear him behind me, the tires of his car sloshing against the rain puddling on the asphalt. He blares his car horn again but I ignore it.
I hear a car door slam and two seconds later, Daniel is in front of me.
"What are you doing? You're getting wet. Are you crazy?" My eyes bounce between his, dumbstruck that he's risking catching a cold.
"Get in the car, Rosé." Daniel says, eerily calm.
His soft voice contradicts the thunderous sound of the rain yet it's not the cold weather that sends chills down my body.
For a moment, we're quiet but my heart is pounding in exhilaration. Mad or not, I can't deny the fact that he gives me butterflies.
"Hey, move your car, jackass!"
Some bonehead shouts and that grabs my attention. I glance behind me and gasp. Daniel has parked haphazardly on the side when there's an angry array of drivers behind him.
When I look back at Daniel, he's so unbothered it's almost amusing.
"You're blocking all the cars, go." I wave him off, squinting because it's hard to see with how fast and violently the rain is falling.
"Car. Now, Rosé." Daniel says again.
What a Neanderthal.
Frustratedly, I glance at the line of cars behind his and all those angry drivers then back at him. He's crazy blocking all that traffic. But the fact that he stopped for me...urgh, I hate him.
I'm drenched, all my clothes are wet and my hair is sticking to my face, and I'm cold so I might as well take the chance of getting home safely.
With a reluctant sigh, I trudge over to the passenger side and open the door. Daniel smugly smiles before climbing inside and driving off. He turns up the heat in the car and I welcome the warmth but when he grabs his varsity jacket from the backseat and drapes it over my body, the warmth ignites into a flame.
"Where are you going? My house is the other way." I say to him when I catch him missing the turn that leads to my home.
"My place is closer, I don't want you catching a cold."
I stare at him as my heart swells with gratitude. I adore him when he's so caring.
It takes ten minutes to get to his apartment and the moment I step in, the heat comforts me. His lights are on but they're dim. Daniel throws his keys on the kitchen counter before disappearing into his bedroom. I walk into the living room to look out the window.
The city looks so ghostly under the rain. Rain sounds are my favorite, they're so soothing and oddly make me feel so warm. I sleep like a baby whenever it rains. Binx hates the rain because Binx hates water. I miss my baby.
My thoughts come crashing down when a small towel covers my head.
Then I feel him behind me.
"Be mad at me all you want but take care of yourself first." He gruffly says as if he's holding himself back from scolding me for walking in the rain.
I turn around with the towel around my head and look up at him. His eyes are heavy with concern and yearning.
"Here," he hands me some clothes, "Take a shower before you catch a cold."
I grab the clothes and walk into his bathroom. I know I should be going home but taking a hot shower and getting warm is too tempting.
Stripping off my wet clothes, I step into the steaming hot shower, sighing in contentment as my numb fingers burn. My eyes wander over the body washes and I grab one. It smells citrusy and woodsy. My tummy flutters at the thought of smelling like Daniel and wearing his clothes.
His clothes are big on me but I make them work by rolling up the waistband of the gray sweatpants and sleeves of the sweatshirt.
When I step out of his bathroom, I see him in the kitchen.
"Take these." He gestures to the two pills on the counter.
Aspirin.
"Thank you." I softly whisper as I put the two tablets into my mouth and swallow them down with the glass of water.
I watch him walk into the bathroom and my eyes wander over to his refrigerator randomly.
I freeze halfway taking a gulp when I see the photo booth prints stuck on his fridge with a cherry magnet. Then his phone lights up with a message but it's the photo he's used as the wallpaper that has my heart weeping in indescribable pain. It's the photo he took of us on our date in St. Vermont.
When he steps out of the bathroom, my teary eyes lock onto him as overwhelming emotions drown me in their awakening. It's like my heart has been torn open and left hollow. These emotions are too much that it's making me lightheaded. All the sadness, all the anger, all the longing is pouring out within my ragged breaths.
I can't go on like this any longer, I need him to end this before I break.
All along, he had memories of us around him and he was chasing me around, making my heart flutter and making me question my sanity. If he thought I was not worth it, why does he have pictures of us? Why is he chasing after me? Why is he still caring about me? Why can't he end my misery and kiss me and make me forget the past month never happened.
Daniel looks confused when he catches the tears in my eyes.
"Rosé, why are you cryi—"
"I was raped, Daniel." I choke out those haunting words, baring my ugly truth to the boy I'm in love with.
Daniel tenses as his eyes darken.
I take a step closer to him, my hands shaking in anxiousness. I need to tell him this even if it means baring him my broken soul because he needs to understand why I'm so freaking hurt by his words.
"After that night, I completely lost myself. I hated myself. It took years of therapy for me to love myself again. But I never felt worthy. Until you came along but you saying I'm not...after I trusted you with myself, with my body...you broke my heart." My soft cry quivers with my last words just the way my heart broke the moment he said those heartless words to me.
Daniel is speechless—malevolent darkness surrounds him. It's so black that fearful tremors swirl around my body.
"When will you end this because it hurts too much, Daniel." I whisper in my small, quiet cries.
As much as I'm mad at him, I want him back.
I miss him.
I miss him so freaking much.
"You buying me books, getting me my favorite coffee. You have our photos in your apartment and on your phone...," I take a shaky breath, tears streaming down my cheeks, "Please end this, I can't take this any longer."
I want him to say sorry and just hold me. I can't describe how badly I need him in this moment. It's like being hungry for days and finally having something in front of you yet it's being kept away from you.
I sniffle as I turn around, wiping at my cheeks as my eyes glance at the photos of us on his refrigerator.
I'm so consumed by him, it's scary but I wouldn't change it for the world. I don't regret him. There was not one moment where I ever regretted being with him. Because every moment wrote our story—writes our story.
Two strong arms hug me from behind. My heart catches in my mouth. Daniel's hold is tight and almost frightened as if he's too afraid to let go. His body is pressed against mine and the warmth that radiates from him spreads all over my body and my hunger has been fulfilled.
"I'm sorry." Daniel whispers those two words with heart-aching, genuine remorse.
I melt in his arms—he feels like home. I close my eyes and bask in the warmth of his arms around me and the soothing thuds of his heartbeat.
After a whole month, I can finally feel like I can breathe again.
"I can't lose you," Daniel snuggles more into me, drowning me into his addictive soul, "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, baby."
Having enough of this heartache, I turn around in his arms and hug him so tightly like I never want to let him go—burying my face in his chest as he buries his in my hair, our arms around each other, holding onto one another as if we're too scared to let go.
God, he feels like home.
"I've missed you." He mumbles into my hair.
I sniffle and pull back a little to stare up into his eyes.
"I've missed you, too."
I softly smile and cradle his cheeks to kiss him. Daniel sighs and tangles his fingers into my hair as we kiss. It's not an intense kiss but a sweet, yearning kiss that washes away all of our heartbreak.
Daniel breaks the kiss and searches my eyes which makes me giddily smile. He brushes my hair away from my face and pecks my forehead. My tummy swirls with butterflies and warmth and love.
"I want you." I whisper.
"Baby, we don't have to—"
"No, I want to, I promise."
I know he will want to ask questions about my past but we can deal with that after tonight. Tonight I need him to touch me, to kiss me, to make me moan his name in euphoria. To make the last month seem like a distant memory.
Daniel crashes his lips on mine in a ravaging kiss. My arms wrap around his neck as I tilt my head to deepen the kiss. I feel his hands glide down my body to haul me up in his arms, I moan when I feel his erection against my aching core.
Daniel walks us into the bedroom and lays me down on his bed before leaning over me between my thighs. His eyes rake over my face, drinking in every little feature of mine and all the flaws that I'm self-conscious of feel beautiful under his gaze.
"Fuck, you're so beautiful." Daniel whispers, captivated and intoxicated from our chemistry.
Impatiently, I tug on his t-shirt and he's taking it off in an instant. Daniel grabs my thigh to wrap it around him and I whimper when his hard-on brushes against my sex. Fumbling with my clothes, Daniel teases them off of my body.
I'm not wearing any undies or bra so when he sees me bare, his eyes dilate with dark lust. When I feel his tongue swirl around my nipple, I moan, throwing my head back and closing my eyes.
Daniel kneads my waist and licks a path of fire up my cleavage, up my throat before slithering his tongue inside my mouth. My tummy swirls with arousal when he bites my bottom lip and brushes his thumbs along my nipples.
I brush my hands over his soft skin before tangling my fingers through his hair. Daniel groans with hunger.
"Rosé," he breathily says my name, "Fuck, I've fallen for you."
I look into his eyes with love and smile. Cradling his cheeks, I brush my lips against his in a feathery stroke.
"And I've fallen for you."
My hands run along his toned abs and up his strong arms, mesmerized by his beautiful body. Daniel bites my neck before sucking on the sensitive flesh to soothe the pain. With hooded, clouded-with-lust-and-love eyes, I clumsily move his sweatpants down.
Once we're both naked, Daniel makes me more comfortable on the bed, making sure my head is on the pillows before he grabs a condom from his nightstand and hands me the foil packet. Hastily, I tear it open and slip the wet material onto his cock.
Daniel grabs my thighs, cradles my cheek to kiss me as he slides inside of me. I moan when I feel the familiar euphoric lust swirl inside me after so long. Daniel buries his face in my neck, groaning like he's been sedated with the most beautiful drug ever.
"Fuck that whole month." Daniel huskily says with ragged breaths.
I softly giggle because I could not agree more.
Daniel sways his hips in soft yet deep thrusts. I hold his flexed arms, glancing between us as I watch him slide in and out of me. I throw my head back and arch my back when his pelvis brushes along my clit, the feeling is like sweet sin.
"You feel so good..." A breathy moan whispers through my lips, my eyes hood as they stare at him.
Daniel bites his bottom lip, his brows creasing as a faint, smug, pleasured smile paints on his tempting lips.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." I whisper.
Daniel smirks and curls his hand around my throat as he fucks me so hard, the headboard slams against the wall. The bed squeaks with each deep, passionate thrust of his. I whimper when he leans down to softly bite my bottom lip, my eyes fluttering closed as I sway my hips to match his mind-crushing thrusts.
"I love how you feel, baby...so tight...so wet...so mine." Daniel wickedly whispers in my ear, fucking me as he says each word and every word making my tummy flutter in lust.
Daniel removes his hand from my throat and moves his arm behind to rest his hand on the headboard. His tongue sucks on the sweet spot on my neck, a sweet moan sings out of my mouth as he fastens his pace. The bed thuds against the wall. The sound of my arousal ignites an illicit flame that feels like the sweetest drug ever.
With ragged breaths, Daniel and I look down between our bodies and the sight of my arousal on his dick and my thighs is damn near x-rated.
"Daniel..." I whimper when he thrusts into my sweet spot and I come with a heart-fluttering pleasure.
Daniel orgasms with a gruff moan against my neck before he falls onto me, exhausted. After I catch my breath, I lift his head up and cradle his cheeks as I look into his eyes. He looks so hot and content, his gorgeous eyes molten with adoration.
"You make me so happy." I confess in a tender whisper before kissing him.
Daniel
Fuck.
I'm in love.