A/N: Behold, another chapter for all of my wonderful, beautiful readers! I'm putting the author's note at the top so that you won't have to worry about reading this nonsense at the bottom. I would like to sincerely apologise for the delay and thank you for your kindness. Your support is what truly keeps me going. I'm on semestral break so if I don't post the next chapter within next week, all you have to do is nag me! I love being nagged lol... I'm really excited for the concluding chapters in this book, and I truly hope you all are too! :D
Enjoy!
....................................................................................................................................
...My heart is wondrous light,
Since this same wayward girl is so reclaim'd."
― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet
.............................................................................................
CHAPTER 25 - Obstinate Recovery
~ RS ~
Waking up never felt more torturous for Renee, who was not privy to the number of hours she was unconscious. All she knew upon gaining awareness was that the world felt like falling beneath her feet and it would swallow her up while she was struggling with her throat that was hurting like mad from so much soreness.
Renee put a hand on her forehead, only to find out that she was still burning with fever. If she really did take medication prior to her sleep, it certainly did not improve her condition at all.
What was it again?
Acromantulitis.
Renee has never heard of such a disease, and if she knew this would happen to her, she would've stayed as far away from Angelina Johnson as possible.
It was awful enough that Renee felt like dying, but her situation was even more lamentable because of the additional burden in her heart. She fuzzily recalled Severus talking to her, speaking to her without any tone of disdain, much unlike when she overheard him conversing with Dumbledore, telling the headmaster how much he loathed her company, which of course, was heart-crushing on every level.
Renee was genuinely unsure of what she feels as of now; she finds it senseless that no matter how many times Severus would hurt her, she just could never fall out of love with him. Just when he uttered his apology yesterday, if one could call it as such, she knew that she wasn't angry at him anymore, which was a clear testament of how she truly feels for the man.
I am so terribly fucked.
However, Renee may not be angry at Severus, but she was not keen on talking to him either. She still could not understand why she just couldn't get over the man.
With tremendous effort, Renee turned her head to the side and found an empty chair and a desk with stacks of parchments on top of it. But she almost fell off her bed when she saw a familiar item-- the quill she gave Severus for Christmas was also resting above of a tome, as well as the inkpot that was beside it.
Don't even think about it, Renee. That doesn't mean anything, she pithily told herself.
As Renee found herself mulling over whether Severus had stayed for the night or not, the man walked in with a tray of food, making her heart clench rather painfully.
"Have you been able to rest well?" Severus asked as he put the tray on the desk, shoving the papers aside.
Her being upset took over her so Renee continued to give the man silent treatment once again. Her eyes were focused anywhere but on Severus and she heard him sigh deeply.
"I presume that you still cannot move your hands. Will you give me permission to feed you?"
As much as Renee was taken aback, she wasn't about to be made to look like a weakling. "I'm not incapable!" Renee attempted to shout but failed terribly, for her hoarse voice sounded like that of a wounded animal's, begging for relief. Feeling the pain in her body worsen, she admittedly regretted her outburst.
For Severus, watching Renee in a state where she could not even hold a spoon was more than afflictive. Merlin knows he never meant to hurt her in the first place; in fact, the only reason why he said the things he wished he hadn't was because she hurt him too, which of course, was not justifiable in any way.
And it was as if he had not learned from his past.
"Please let me assist." Severus uttered stoically, looking at Renee's duvet instead of her eyes.
The girl decided that the ceiling was a much better view for her red-rimmed eyes so she fixated her defiant but weak stare at it, then eventually shut her eyes to the world, completely unbothered by the man's plea. She never even noticed that her bed was being carefully levitated so she could be in a sitting position until she was already upright.
Renee was already pinning her gaze to the wall until she felt a warm hand cup her cheek and raise her face, and she was now forced to look at two obsidian irises.
"Please? You really are in need of nourishment." Severus commented, his silky voice causing Renee to shiver.
Don't tell me that after everything, he still has the same effect on me.
A spoon with succulent-looking soup was raised to Renee's mouth, and realizing that she would be no better than a petulant, whining child if she refuses, she finally gave in and consumed it, unable to wrap her head around the fact that Severus Snape was feeding her.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Severus carried on with his abetment. "You have missed quite a lot of schoolworks in the duration of your absence, but I already gave the excuse slips to your professors and they graciously provided me with the things you need to accomplish. I will be giving them to you once you're on your way to recovery, but for now, you... are simply too sick."
Renee didn't know what game was Severus playing and why is he being so nice since yesterday. All she knew was that the cost of being the loser in whatever that game was would be unmistakably high.
"Rest is your priority at the moment." Severus emphasized gently. "I suppose I should also inform you that we are now on our Easter break and all the students have been sent home. This should give you ample time to finish all of your missed works. Your little friends left something for you, by the way." he pointed at a rather large envelope on top of the nightstand.
"Severus," Poppy called, interrupting the lone moment between the two and entered her ward. "Oh Merlin's beard, you woke up just in time, Renee! Remus is here."
Something finally made Renee smile-- she could not be more stoked to see Remus.
"I see." Severus huffed and stood up to walk out. "I will leave you to him, then."
The sick young lady looked at Severus with worry. "Wait..."
Renee could not believe that the thought of Severus leaving her still provided her heart the most unwanted company: pain.
"Yes, Renee?" Severus turned back around and asked, much to the bewilderment of the girl, because not once has he ever addressed her with her first name in front of anyone. Much to her relief and most likely Severus' as well, the mediwitch did not seem to notice anything unconventional and left the ward after announcing the ex-DADA professor's return to Hogwarts.
"Will you come back later?"
The professor tensed and his usually skeptical expression seemed to have soften. "Yes. I believe I owe you an explanation..."
"I do too," Renee whispered. The look of surprise on Severus' face did not go unnoticed.
"Alright, then. I shall see you later."
"Do you mean that?"
Severus slowly walked back to Renee, taking his time with languid, graceful strides until he reached her side. Carefully, he held her hand and caressed the back of it with his thumb, making her stomach churn from the inevitable side effects of being hopelessly and maddeningly in love.
"I won't deprive you of my justifications, however inexcusable they may be. You have my word."
Unable to take the intensity of Severus' penetrating gaze and the deep, ear-pleasuring voice that came along with it, Renee simply closed her eyes and nodded in understanding, sighing in despair upon hearing his fading footsteps.
"Hey there, pumpkin," spoke a teasing but endearing voice Renee was all too familiar with.
"Remmy," she greeted weakly. "I'm so happy to see you."
Remus took the seat next to Renee's bed and dropped the plastic bags he was carrying onto the floor. "Oh, my dear," he kissed her forehead, looking terribly worried. "When you told me you were incredibly stressed, I didn't expect you to be infected with a life-threatening sickness."
"That's 'cause I wasn't infected when I wrote to you," Renee smiled. "Did you take a disease-repelling potion?"
"Yes, Poppy was more than kind to provide one for me," he stated cheerfully. "I brought you all of your favourite food, by the way!"
"Oh, Rem. You didn't have to spend on me."
"Are you mad? You're the only family I have left. I love you and I don't mind taking care of you."
"I love you too, so much," Renee squeezed his hand. "You have Sirius, though. How is he by the way?"
"Completely bored out of his wits, but he'll be fine. He sends his warmest regards. When he isn't cleaning the house, he's sneaking out of the neighborhood as Padfoot, the great bloody dog. As of now, it's you that I'm worried about."
"I'll be fine soon, Remmy. Poppy's taking good care of me." she assured, as a vision of a certain dark-haired man entered her mind. "How's your new job?"
"Awful, to be honest. De-gnoming Padfoot's back garden is a far more enjoyable task than my job. I'll just have to make the most out of it until I find a new one. There's a potential offer for me as an employee-- hopefully as a cook in the Diagon Alley branch of Hog's Head. But hey, shouldn't we be discussing about you? How are you, my love? What's been happening?"
Renee exhaled. "Where do I begin?"
"Go on, pumpkin, tell me everything." Remus smiled encouragingly.
"Well, let me start with my friends, particularly Fred--"
"The Weasley kid who's got a crush on you?" the man grinned mischievously, earning a slap from the sick girl.
"Yeah, sort of. How do you even know that?"
"I've been in touch with Arthur recently and he told me that ninety percent of Fred's letters to him were all about you. Kingsley too-- he would tell me that whenever he drops by here, he would see that you two are always together. Wait a minute, don't tell me--"
"Before you jump to conclusions, no, we're not dating. He's really just my best friend." Renee pressed.
"Ah, alright, if you say so." Remus feigned amusingly. "So what about Fred?"
"As you know, he's my closest friend, and we had a misunderstanding a couple of weeks ago. It was one of the reasons why I was upset for a long time but we've made up now, we're totally fine. But other stuff has been stressing me out as well..."
Renee warily told Remus the incident of the Black Lake kidnapping, relayed Alexander's threats to him and described how the case of 'Barty Crouch' was confusing everyone.
"You should have told me earlier about this! We can't take this lightly, Renee, not when murders are being reported all around! Who exactly is this Alexander and why is he threatening you of all people?!" Remus asked angrily, his blood boiling.
"He's... well, he's a Death Eater, I suppose." Renee replied with uncertainty, unable to figure out Alexander's exact position under Voldemort's rule. "Do you know my mother, Remus?"
Remus' shock and curiosity of Renee's question was apparent on his face. "No, Philip has never told us anything about her, not even a picture of any sort. Why, Renee?"
•••
If Severus had been born an imbecile, he would have already run out of ideas on how to make it up to this particular young lady who he managed to hurt deeply that it affected him severely. But no, he is an intelligent, perceptive and occasionally stubborn man who's now, for reasons unknown to Merlin, walking along the coast of the Black Lake, waiting for Renee to finish her conversation with her cousin-slash-godfather, thinking about how he would deal with their unresolved situation later. He knew it was wise of him to stay awake late last night and finish his paperworks so that today will be devoted for taking care of his beloved.
My beloved? What makes you think you have the right to call her that, you daft, insensitive prick?
"Mnnnnn.."
With a sharp turn of his head, Severus looked at the source of the odd, melodic voice that interrupted his too deep thoughts. Upon seeing where the voice came from, his eyes widened with dawning curiosity and immediately acknowledged the culprit with an arch of his brow.
"Mnnnimaatuuuuh..."
A strangely beautiful Siren, who was sitting by the coast with her long hair covering her breasts, was looking right up at Severus, and he could only do so much as to look back for he has never foreseen the moment when he would actually need to use the language of the merpeople, and kept in mind to take time and learn Mermish before the Dark Lord decides to resurrect himself and hex his bollocks for not 'keeping his faith'.
Sensing no danger, Severus slowly approached the being with surreptitious caution. Not once has he ever experienced dealing with such creatures and he found it really peculiar that this Siren visited an all-Selkie-and-Merrow territory, so the creature obviously did not come here for mindless chitchat.
"Mnnnnimaaaaatuuuuh Rennnnnnn..." the Siren kept speaking, or singing, depending on how one could perceive its vocal form of communication, but either way, her voice was of no use to Severus. He shook his head and gestured that he was not understanding anything, leaving a frustrated Siren.
The aquatic being pulled the string of a shell necklace away from her neck which she has been wearing and handed it to Severus, who was reluctant to take the object for it might be cursed, but there was this look on the Siren's face that was so pleading and innocent and he was almost tempted to take it.
"Reeennnnn... Reeneeeeeee..." the Siren uttered.
It was then when Severus realised who she was referring to, and immediately took the necklace. Peering on its inside, relieved that the object wasn't cursed, he saw a beautiful laughing baby with a smile that he could recognise in a heartbeat, confirming his suspicions. There was also an equally joyous, brown-haired man who held the child with eyes that look the exact same as that of the person who he was supposed to be taking care of in the hospital wing.
"Hhhhhhsshheeee... Siiiiiiii..." she pleaded, and was now handing Severus two corked vials filled with blue, glowing liquid.
"Would you... allow me to enter your mind?" Severus asked, pulling his wand out and pointing it to his temple then at hers. To his surprise, the Siren nodded, and he wasted no time.
"Legilimens."
•••
"Rem... Remmy?"
A rather powerful groggy sensation engulfed Renee's better senses. "Hi pumpkin," Remus smiled.
"Oh, gosh," Renee bolted herself upright from her bed. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to fall asleep--"
"Shhh, it's alright, some rest will definitely do you good."
Renee regretted sitting up too quickly; she could barely feel her back from so much pain and her head ached like mad. Remus was still sitting right in front of her, yet another person who stood by the doorway with his arms crossed, watching the whole scene, caught her attention.
Remus must've noticed Renee looking at Severus because he turned around and looked at the man as well, who seemed annoyed that there were now two people looking at him and as response, he merely rolled his eyes and locked his gaze onto the wall behind the patient.
Turning back to Renee, Remus said, "I was informed that there are only limited stocks of disease-repelling potions left, and according to your professor over there, there's only enough for him and Poppy."
"Oh!" Renee replied, briefly looking at Severus. "So you won't be able to visit me anymore?" she asked sadly.
"Well, if I save the remaining contents of the bottle I took today, I'll still have some for tomorrow, which means, regrettably, that I'll have to leave you for now..." Remus spoke with sorrow.
"I see... well, I love you, Remus."
The brown-haired man kissed Renee's forehead. "I love you too, pumpkin. I'll be back tomorrow, I promise. Take care, okay?"
"Yeah, you too." Renee held his hand one last time.
"I'm going to be looking into what you said about... Clarice. I'll ask Arthur and Kingsley too if they know this Alexander bastard. I'll let you know tomorrow."
"Okay. You better go now or you'll catch my disease."
"Bye pumpkin, see you."
"Bye Rem."
Renee saw the much-anticipated tension between Remus and Severus when the former walked past the latter, allowing no recognition to be given to one another.
"Has there been any improvement, Renee?" Severus asked, still leaning on the wall by the doorway.
Renee admittedly got tired of giving Severus the silent treatment; if she was honest, she wasn't even mad at him anymore. "Less headache, I suppose. But my throat is still massively sore."
Severus levitated a stool to Renee's bedside and walked to sit there. "I take it that you are not in the mood for talking?"
Heart thumping rapidly, Renee replied, "Not really."
"Alright, just inform me when you're... ready."
"Thank you."
Renee felt a hand enclosing hers and she almost lost it. It seems as though Severus' effect on her mental and emotional state was still as painstakingly great as when she first realised that she loved him.
"I'm sorry, Renee. I truly wish I could take it all back." Severus apologised, his hold on her tightening.
Tears once again defiantly rolled down Renee's flushed cheeks. "I don't mind knowing the truth, Severus. It's okay."
"It is not 'okay'. It's not the truth. Far from it, actually." His other hand caressed her face as his thumb wiped her tears. "It is for the simple reason that I was angry at that time. Not at you... but at myself. Anyway, how stubborn of me-- you said you didn't want to talk about this now. Let me just get something--"
Severus went out of Renee's ward for a moment, and she took that opportunity to grab the envelope by her nightstand and read its contents.
Dearest Renee,
You have no idea how concerned we are of you when we learned that you were sick! I tried to beg McGonagall to let me stay so that I could help take care of you, but sadly, she insisted to Merlin that we all go home and assured me that you are well-taken cared of. You better be, or else they'll have to face me! If you ever need anything, just write to me, okay? If you need help with schoolworks (not that I can provide much for you) we're just here-- well, Hermione's here. Renee, please take care of yourself. Stop worrying us like that. We heard that Lupin is going there so we asked him to bring some food we bought for you. Mum cooked something for you too-- it's really good. Everybody here wishes for you to get well. I wish you hadn't been sick so you could've spent Easter break with us all. But all I want now is for you to recover.
Write to me when you can, please? Rest well!
Lots of love,
Fred
Renee smiled as she finished reading Fred's letter and found George, Jamila, Luna, Harry and Ron's short sweet get-well messages. Tonks' bit made her giggle quite hard; she now knew that the auror, who didn't even bother to be cryptic, has the most adorable crush on Remus.
Dear Renee,
How are you? I hope you still know me, we met at the WWGP! We all wish for you to get well soon! Drink lots of fluids and don't forget your medications. And eat a lot, keep healthy always!
And if you don't mind, can you tell me what Remus' favourite colour is?
Take care always,
Tonks
And Hermione's message was, as expected, informative and intriguing.
Hello Renee,
I hope you're feeling much better by the time you've read this. If I only knew earlier that you had Acromantulitis, I could've done research already! You must know about this already but I'll still write it down, just in case. Here's what I found: three drops of haddock's tears every five hours will speed up your recovery. I do hope Madam Pomfrey has a phial or two in her stocks!
Just remember to eat a lot of healthy food and take your potions regularly. I hope you like the meals we sent you!
Get well really soon!
Hermione
"I'm aware that your little friends have indulged you with endless food--" Severus re-entered the ward, carrying a brown paper bag. "It seems as though they've sent enough for a whole feast, but I just thought that maybe you might enjoy something else tonight. Something that isn't layered with grease and fats and doesn't end with the word 'pie'."
"Wow, is it nighttime already?" Renee asked.
"It's only thirty minutes past five, but I figured that you might appreciate an early dinner."
Severus transfigured the nightstand into a table and levitated a stool to sit by Renee's bedside. She had difficulty sitting up and blushed copiously when his hand held her back to help her up. The professor unloaded all of the paper bag's contents onto the table and to her gushing surprise, they were all of Renee's favourite comfort foods: yogurt, strawberry trifle, sliced oranges and some muggle chocolate.
"You can't have been that good of a guesser to know that all of those were my favourites," Renee said bewilderingly and completely forgot that she was supposed to be mad at him. "You entered my mind, didn't you?"
"I did no such thing." Severus smirked and seemed pleased that she was now talking to her. "I simply took advantage of the fact that someone who knows you very well was here and took the liberty of asking him what you might want under the special circumstances that you've been set to."
"That's... nice of you. Thank you."
Severus assisted Renee as she ate, his eyes never leaving her person. "I do not even know what these things are-- Are they supposed to be chocolate? Why are they shaped like a turd?"
"They're..." Renee uttered, struggling to keep her giggling at a minimum. "They're called kisses."
"Why?"
"Don't know, really. By the way--" Renee got Hermione's letter and showed it to Severus.
"Ah, clever of her, but she isn't the first to discover that. In fact," Severus pulled out two small vials filled with blue, glowing, translucent, liquid and placed it on the table. "I was given the tears."
"By who?"
Severus looked at her carefully. "Someone called Clarice."
"I still don't know if she really is my mother." she sighed.
"Not to be impertinent, but there really isn't much to confirm. She allowed me to enter her mind so she could provide me some information about you."
"You're right," Renee murmured. "I look like her, don't I?"
"Indeed you do, but you're more..."
"What?"
"Beautiful."
"Oh," By now Renee's cheeks were all shades of red. Don't you fall for that trap again, young lady! It was just a compliment!
"And your father... what has become of him?"
She couldn't possibly give Severus a clue on what the magnitude of their massively unhealthy relationship was and didn't know where to begin describing her father. Severus sensed her discomfort and said, "Forgive me for being so intrusive--"
"No, it's okay. I don't get along with him that's why I hate talking about him."
"Forgive me."
Renee smiled. "So will you now give points to Gryffindor for Hermione's informative research?"
"Hmmm... no. Still no."
"Aw, come on, even just a single point? Please?"
Severus seemed to resist the corner of his lips from being tempted to smile. "Alright. Just one point. Tell this to anyone and you'll get detention until the end of the term."
I don't even object to that. Besides, the school year's about to end...
Shut up, Renee!
"Yes! That's all I ask." Renee grinned.
"Heavens, you're looking much better, Renee!" Madam Pomfrey rushed to approach her patient and put her hand on her forehead. "But dear, oh, dear, you're still quite hot-- when are the tears to be administered, Severus darling?"
Severus cringed at the nickname, making Renee stifle a laugh. "Right after she eats, then every five hours."
"Wonderful! I'll leave you two, then." and Madam Pomfrey walked out of the ward, bringing Renee's meals from her friends with her so she could cast a stasis charm on them.
"Trust me, if Filch doesn't keep those contained, the food'll all be gone by tomorrow." Severus whispered, causing Renee to chuckle heartily. "I must admit that I missed you... although I do understand that the fault is entirely mine."
Oh, Severus, don't say things like that. It's hard enough to un-love you...
"I missed you too," You did not just say that to him! "But all the while I was under the impression that you never wanted to see me again."
"Wrong. Completely, utterly wrong," Severus silkily muttered in Renee's ear. He then stood up to sit on her bed and she quickly adjusted herself to make room for him, unable to figure out what he was about to do next. She couldn't resist it; she suddenly held his hand like he would go and leave her anytime soon. She expected him to pull back but he didn't. He used his other hand to run his fingers through her chestnut hair and then placed it on her face, gently stroking her cheek with his thumb.
Renee looked up with glassy eyes onto Severus' deep gaze, and without thinking, placed a chaste kiss on his soft lips. He didn't move nor resist, he simply held onto her securely. He opened his arms to embrace her vulnerable body, and she returned it with a hug that was so beguilingly tight. The two were so engrossed with each other that not one of them noticed the presence of two peeking eyes by the door that was left ajar.