I watched on as Channing made Phelan Beta with an ache in my chest. Even though Phelan and I had not mated, Channing had changed his mind about that and made plans to make Phelan Beta as soon possible.
Well here we were.
It had been 2 weeks since Phelan had stopped me from seeing Channing at all. At meetings he would reach for my hand, or say my name as if to remind me that he was there, and whenever I ignored him or said no to him I was faced with hurt and rejection.
It broke me to pieces every single time.
Something was changing. Everything was different between Channing and I and I couldnt process why.
I watched as Phelan waved at me over his shoulder as he and his friends went for a run. I forced a smile and waved back. Things had changed between me and Phelan as well. I could feel the bond strengthening between us. He had promised to take things slow, I slept in the guest bedroom and we hadnt even kissed since Channing broke the news about Tyrina.
I strode towards Channing and met his gaze with a smile. Channing? I whispered. He glared down at me with a cocked eyebrow. You are no longer my Beta Kiyiya, you may refer to me as Alpha. He said as his eyes wandered around the area. What happened between us was a mistake. I shouldnt have made those moves on you like that. It was wrong and detrimental to our pack. He said quietly.
Shock morphed onto my face as my jaw dropped. Channing Alpha! he snarled and I backed away before running from him as my dress flowed out behind me as I ran towards Phelans house.
I slammed the door behind me as I made my way up the stairs before pausing as I felt a short stab of pain in my abdomen. Running up the stairs I flung the bathroom door open before hunching over the toilet.
I could feel my wolf growling at the thought of being sick. She hated being cooped up in a room and I knew she would hate me if I got sick.
I rubbed my stomach as I hurled into the toilet. Then pausing I wiped my mouth and stared down at the tiny bump that stood out against my flat stomach. I smiled and cradled my stomach. I was about to link Phelan and tell him the news but knowledge forced my silence.
Phelans not the father
I let out a sob as it racked my body. I felt so weak.
I didnt know how to tell Channing. After how he treated me this morning, I didnt even want him to be the father but as I cradled my small bump, everything seemed more perfect than it had ever felt before. Channings baby or not, I was going to give this child life, even if it depended on mine.
I leant against the kitchen island as I waited for the steak to cook through. I was about to flip them when the door burst open and Channing stared at me incredulously. Kiyiya? he asked, his eyes as wide as dinner plates. Youre having a baby? he asked, almost smiling but shock looked like it was the only thing stopping him from grinning.
******
I shrugged and looked down at the steaks as they sizzled. Does it matter? I asked not meeting his gaze. His growl reverberated off the walls as he stared me down. Of course it matters. My baby is growing inside of you. He said stepping towards me but my hand shot up and slapped him across the face.
I could feel shock creeping from the darkness to grab me but I didnt care.
My wolf made sure of that as she took control. How dare you Channing? I only just found out and you think that its okay to talk to me like you did? How dare you? she said. And I whimpered in the back of our mind as she slowly gave control back to me.
I stared into Channings electric blue eyes as his wolf tried for control. Growling, he took my hands and pinned me against the wall behind him as Phelan entered the room. Phelan eyed Channing with his knuckles flaring white as his fists clenched against the kitchen counter.
I thought I had made it very clear Channing, if you touch her I was going to really fuck you up. He growled as he stepped closer towards Channings figure as he held me behind him.
I winced and yelped as Channings grip tightened on my wrists. I wont hesitate to protect her from you Phelan. Youre disgusting. Channing growled. I couldnt hold back the sharp gasp that left my mouth as Phelan began to shake.
Channing, stop please. Your hurting me. I yelped as he pushed me harder against the wall in efforts to get me further from Phelan who was losing control quickly.
Let go of my MATE! Phelan yelled as I struggled against Channings grip. Phelan, please calm down. I whispered and then to Channing I growled. Alpha, it was an order to tell you if he hurt me. He hasnt. Now leave.
Channing growled and let me go. I instantly fled from his angry state and into Phelans arms.
I didnt want a fight to break out in the same room as me especially when I was pregnant. Channing. Please go. I dont want this happening right now. I am not going to fight with you. I whispered as I rubbed Phelans chest with my hands, trying to calm him.
Just leave. I said looking from the corner of my eye at him and he visibly tensed before leaving Phelan and I alone in our kitchen.
I turned to Phelan. I dont know why he was here, I didnt ask him over I swear. I said placing my hand on his cheek. He didnt say anything as his eyes searched mine.
Do you know how much I hate not being able to go to his house and rip him apart for touching you? For using you? he whispered turning from me and leaning against the bench. Youre my mate Kiyiya. Why can you not accept that. He asked turning his head slightly towards me.
I have tried. I have stayed loyal to you since the ceremony. I didnt do anything with any other women even though you slept with someone else let alone the fact that you wont even sleep in the same bed as me his voice cracked lightly and I felt my heart break.
He stood abruptly and pulled me off the ground and onto the counter. The sparks that erupted on my skin were, to say the least, enticing. Every cell in my body yearned with excitement as he opened my legs and stood between them.
I dont understand. I have tried so hard to become a better person. To be the mate you want me to be. To be the man you want me to be. He whispered, his voice breaking. His whisper sent a broken ache to my heart once more. I want you to be able to say it back before I say I love you Kiyiya. But I do. Im not going say it yet though. Im just not ready. He said and I placed my forehead on his.
I just want to be with you. He said looking into my eyes. His green eyes were swirling with sadness and emotions I couldnt even begin to comprehend.
I wanted to tell Phelan that I was expecting a child with the Alpha that he wanted to slaughter in cold blood but when I opened my mouth, no words came out. I wanted to open my heart to him and finally accept the bond.
Phelan, I think I might actually love you I whispered smiling, but suddenly courage came over me as he smiled. but there is something that I need to say. I added and I instantly regretted it. I bowed my head down and tried to force the words from my mouth. I I tried. I really did. I wanted nothing more than to cut the secrets between us, but the fear I had shut me up as his eyes met mine in a gaze that made me hold my tongue.
I know about the baby, Kiyiya.
My head shot up and my eyes widened. He sent a small smile and my jaw dropped as I searched his eyes for any bluff, but found none.
Phelan No, hey its okay. I get that you were in love with him. I really do. He said cradling my face in his big hands as he brushed tears aside. I understand baby. I understand that but Im your mate. I will love this child with all my heart because its yours. He said moving his hands to my waist as he lifted the shirt up to expose my stomach. He gently laid me backwards and kissed my small bump gently.
I couldnt explain my happiness, he was going to accept me and my unborn child!
He carefully swooped me up into his arms and carried me upstairs and towards my room but I shook my head. Can I sleep with you? I whispered and the shock was evident on his face as it morphed into a grin. He kicked open bedroom door and threw me onto the bed.
As he cradled me close to him while humming, I traced small designs on his unfortunately clothed chest. I took in a deep breath before slowly letting my hands trail to the bottom of his shirt before slipping them under. I looked up at him as sparks erupted as our skin touched and smiled when I saw his eyes were blank, just staring at the plain wall behind me.
I had this effect on him.
I slowly, and delicately rode his shirt up before letting my hands just trace the eight pack he had been hiding from me all this time. I giggled slightly as he let out a low growl from deep in his chest.
I cant stop once I start. I have been practising self-control for you but it only goes so far he whispered as his grip on my waist tightened.
I just want to see where this goes. I said rolling him onto his back. He took in a deep ragged breath as he looked at my dress with distaste. Its a beautiful dress and you look stunning in it but he stopped before grabbing the front of it and I let out a gasp as he ripped it from my body.
He let out a small groan as he eyed my body hungrily. Kiyiya he groaned.
I could feel blood rush to my face as I desperately tried to hide my body. He rolled me over so he was hovering over me. If you dont want to do this please tell me now he said with a pain expression. Any further and I dont think I could stop he whispered, looking straight into my eyes and I smiled widely. Phelan I murmured, biting my lip.
He let out a growl and threw the dress away from the bed. Well no turning back now. He said before crashing his lips to mine.