a few weeks later
Living without Mark is boring to say the least.
I find myself to be very reserved now. I don't like going out as much and I would rather stay in my dorm and watch vlogs from my favorite YouTubers.
I also have a new bad habit of staying up really late in order to talk to Mark. He's been super busy but we've definitely been managing. Same with Haechan. We typically send each other memes throughout the day and FaceTime whenever it's convenient for both of us.
Jeno has been inviting me out more often which is really nice of him. I really appreciate it. Sadly it usually feels a tad awkward due to Jaemin typically being there also.
I've been making the best out of this situation.
I'm trying to.
-
I needed to study for my midterms so I decided to coop myself up in my dorm, while keeping my AirPods in my ears at all times.
As the song I was listening to transitioned to the next, I was able to hear a small knock on my door. I paused my music and rushed over, wondering who it could be at this time of night.
When I opened the door I was beyond surprised,
It was Raven.
"What are you doing here?"
I knew that I had an attitude but I
had every right to have one!
"I know you hate me and I know our friendship ended terribly, but please hear me out Mel"
"First of all I'm Melanie to you,
Secondly why should I bother to hear you out? You back stabbed, sabotaged, and spoke to me with disrespect. You're a terrible person, there's nothing you can say right now would convince me otherwise"
"Melanie I miss you! I'm sorry! For everything, you're absolutely right, I was a terrible friend to you and you have every right to hate me. Truth be told I hate myself for what I did to you. I betrayed you, and if this is the last time that I talk to you I just want you to know that I'm sorry okay?"
I nodded my head hoping that she got the message that it was time for her to leave. But this bitch didn't get the hint,
"I know that Mark and Haechan just moved to Korea, so I know that you're probably lonely. The same way you don't have any girl friends, is the same as me. If you need a girl to talk to, I'm here."
I nodded as I actually closed the door this time around. I don't know what that was about, but all I know is that she tried that.
I went back to my bed and continued studying. I tried calling Haechan but he was in practice, and so was Mark.
Although I hate to admit it, I definitely need new girl friends. Not to sound basic but I've always hung out around guys because I genuinely think they're more fun to be around. However I do miss the bond that comes with having a really close girl friend.
-
As I walked to my calculus class I ran into Jungwoo, who happened to be going to the same class.
"Hey jungwoo, are you ready to fail?"
"Yea, I came to that conclusion
while I was studying"
His voice is naturally so soft and timid, it makes my heart warm every time I hear it.
"I need your advice"
"What's up?"
"You remember what happened between Raven and I, right?"
"Oof how could I forget?"
"Well last night she came to my dorm room and asked if I wanted to be friends again. I large part of me is completely against it, because ya know fuck her. But I also miss having a female friend. All my friends are guys, and it's just not the same."
"I understand, maybe you could just be cordial with her. Not like best friends, but friends to say the least. That way you can also observe whether or not she's a changed person."
I nodded my head as we headed into the classroom. Knowing that I was about to fail devastated me, but I kept some hope alive. Before the test even got started, Lucas walked in. I almost forgot that we had two classes together this semester.
He adorned shorter hair that was dyed pitch black, with several earrings along both ears. He looked healthy and happy, which ultimately made me happy. The classroom fell silent as we all took our exam. One girl started crying mid way through.
Me. I was that girl.
Once class was over, Jungwoo and I headed out as we talked about the hardest questions on the test. Jungwoo called Lucas over when he noticed that he was walking by himself.
I grew very timid, considering the fact that I haven't spoken to Lucas in months.
"Hey Jungwoo, hi Melly"
"Hey loocus", Jungwoo and I said in unison causing us all to laugh
"How was it?"
We continued to walk and talk about it amongst ourselves while still managing to make some jokes here and there. Eventually Jungwoo had to catch a bus to take him to the other side of the city, leaving just Lucas and I.
"How are you?" I asked breaking the awkward silence,
"I'm good, I stopped smoking and drinking so much. I only do it occasionally. How about you? How are you holding up?"
"Well I obviously miss them, they're my best friends, I'm just trying to stay positive"
Lucas nodded his head before he responded, "I'm glad that you and Mark got together"
I was taken back a little bit, "Why? You and I were dating-"
"Yea I know, but Mark is perfect for you! I couldn't compete."
I smiled. I'm glad that the awkwardness faded away as we continued to converse while walking through 42nd Street.
"I have a question but I don't want to make you uncomfortable" I said timidly,
"Melly you know it takes a lot to make me uncomfortable, just ask" Lucas said with a laugh
"Do you and Raven still, like, ya know?"
Lucas immediately chuckled, "No in all honesty we stopped talking after what happened at the hospital. She's been trying to get in contact with me, but I just ignore her"
I shook my head in understanding, taking his response into consideration when it comes to making my own decision.
"Why'd you ask?"
"She reached out to me yesterday, but I'm not sure what to do"
"Well if you were able to forgive me, maybe you're ready to forgive her"
Points were made.
Without even realizing it, we were at my building and I headed in while thinking about everything that we just talked about.
By the time I got to my dorm, I snuggled up in my bed and called Mark. It was a long shot hoping that he would be awake right now considering the time difference, but I still went for it anyways.
"The number you are trying to dial is busy right now, please leave your message after the-"
I wanted to tell Mark that I talked to Lucas, that way he didn't feel left out or as if I was hiding something from him, but I guess it'll have to wait.
_____________________________
Happy Holidays you guys!!!
I just finished opening up gifts, so now I'm going to take a nap lol
Thank you for 16k!
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️