Athazagoraphobia is the fear of being forgotten or ignored and fear of forgetting. Is that what I am really experiencing? Can I really justify these feelings as a specific phobia? Maybe I am just being dramatic...these feelings will pass and I'll move on...
Some feelings come and go...but I fear that I will never get over these....there's nothing important about being famous..it's just a nice adrenaline feeling. The feeling of being wanted...the feeling of other's envy...do famous people really feed off of that...is that their high?
It's hard to be different because you don't know where your differences will guide you. They may help you succeed in life, or they may draw you out from the world. Am I different or am I just talented? Anyone could have talent and not be famous. Why should I care that my talent is no longer cared about? Should I enjoy letting someone else using my talent become successful?
The feeling of being wanted is gone...now I am here...alone. The feeling of being Normal...is that a good feeling?
A few days later Eleanor laid there awake her mind cluttered with many different thoughts. The feeling to join the others was not present at the moment, she felt the need to be alone to gather up all her issues and put them away for the day.
She winced as she was growing a slight headache from overthinking. She laid there in bed relaxing but yet she felt even more exhausted, overthinking was such tiring exercise that left her panting for air. She sat up slow and held onto her head. The bright light wasn't helping, but she had to get used to it for her to be able to get up for the day. She stood up slowly and got ready for the day. She felt a bit more refreshed after she cleaned herself up and got into some new clothing.
Before she left the room she looked at the mirror one last time, she practiced her fake smile not wanting to leave the room without it then headed to the lobby where she knew everyone was. She saw Serena who looked excited for some reason as she was talking to everyone. She joined the group and smirked slightly.
"Did something go on sale? Why are you so excited this early in the morning?" Eleanor asked her and Serena just squealed.
"All performers are invited to Pierre's Dance Party!!" She squealed and Eleanor winced at the high pitched squeal. She frowned then looked at her smart watch to see the date. It really was that time of year for Pierre's Annual gathering. Last year it was more of a tea party, this year must be more flashy.
"Times flies quickly I didn't know it was that time of year already." Eleanor chuckled lightly.
"So you have gone to these things before?" Ash asked and Eleanor frowned then nodded.
"Part of the job, first time I went..I was just as excited as Serena but once I was Kalos Queen I didn't have as much fun as everyone was just acting fake. When you're surrounded by fake people all the time..it's like they suck out your happiness." Eleanor laughed bitterly. Her right hand clenching on her left arm as memories flushed inside her head, but she was done overthinking for the day.
She cleared her throat and shook her head slightly. "Don't let me ruin your thought of it though, you're going to have a good time." Eleanor said reaching over patting Serena on the shoulder.
"Thank you..." Serena smiled at Eleanor then looked at the rest of her friends.
"So um...I think this might be where we say our goodbyes then." Eleanor laughed lightly then let out a sigh.
Ash's eyes widened and he squinted his eyes as he gave a confused look towards Eleanor. "What are you talking about?" Ash asked.
"I can't go to that party...I am the last person that they want there...and I want Serena to enjoy her time as a performer, and do these kinds of activities. You'll all have a great time, I just know it...but we have to be separate in order for that to happen." Eleanor explained sadly.
"I don't want to go to some stupid party if it means I have to say goodbye." Ash shook his head and reached out for Eleanor who took a step back and kept a serious look on her face.
"It's not goodbye forever....we have the next showcase coming up, then master class,...hopefully not Prison, Snowbelle city gym maybe, and finally the pokemon league."Eleanor reached over pulling everyone into a hug.
"It's never a goodbye...its always a see you later." Clemont retorted as he pulled away and making everyone else do the same. "You take good care of yourself." He continued looking directly at Eleanor with a friendly smile.
In a instant Eleanor returned the smile with one of her own and winked playfully. "I always do." She joked which ended into everyone going into laughter. Serena stepped up to Eleanor with a frown on her face and looked down at the ground.
"I'm sorry I'm the reason that you're leaving." Serena said genuinely as she actually liked her friendship with Eleanor, before she felt some sort of bitterness towards the girl, but now she gained a new friend.
"It's fine....we were going to have to part ways eventually." Eleanor shrugged nonchalantly which bothered Ash but he didn't let it show. He was a bit upset that she was leaving so easily, but he didn't want her to leave on a bad note so he pulled her in for a quick separate hug.
"We will see you soon." He said before pulling back.
Eleanor blinked at him, astonished by his actions then smirked. "See ya Ketchum." She said backing away slowly then turning around. She gave everyone one last wave before exiting the pokemon center. It was bittersweet to leave everyone, sad to see them go but happy because she knew she was going to see them again very soon.
On her own once more Eleanor left town and started her way to the next town. Once she reached out of town she pulled out her phone as she was getting a call.
"Hello?" She said.
"Elle? It's Vicki...do you know what day it is?" Victoria asked over the phone and Eleanor sighed.
"It is the day of the dance...I know. I had to leave everyone so that they could go." She frowned as she explained over the phone.
"I have a plan...let me make a few calls...then I'll come see you." Victoria said in an excited tone before she hung up.
"A plan? A plan for what?" Eleanor asked herself unsure what Victoria meant. She just kept walking to the next town avoiding all the going questions in her head. Her heart was filled with sorrow, but her mind was filled with so many thoughs. She wondered about her next performance, she wondered about the master class ...she wondered of her gym battle.
Snowbelle City, an ice type gym. Ash seemed really excited to get his last badge but Eleanor was a bit more hesitant. Getting this last badge will get her into the pokemon league...will she win? What happens if she wins?....What happens if she lost??? It was so much to think about that she dropped to her knees and screamed. She held onto her head rocking back and forth screaming at herself to stop overthinking. Her brain engines were on overdrive and they just couldn't stop. Tears fell down her face and she curled up into a ball on the soft grass in the forest. She was so overwhelmed that she merely passed out right there in the middle of the forest.
Overhead in the sky was Victoria riding on her Noviern. She heard the scream and saw dozens of startled Flying pokemon flying away. She was on the phone with Eleanor's friends to talk about a surprise she had for Eleanor. They were facing timing on her phone and they all noticed how startled Victoria was. They heard the scream as well, and they noticed how familiar it sounded.
"Victoria..what was that?" Serena asked.
"It sounded like..." Bonnie said and Victoria nodded.
"Like Eleanor...I'm going to check it out." Victoria kindly made Noviern fly down and she gasped when she saw a body passed out in the middle of the woods.
"What is it?? Is it Eleanor??" Clemont asked worriedly.
"She's passed out...I'll call you guys when I have more information." She said.
"No! Don't hang up!" Ash yelled out but she had already hung up. Victoria jumped off of Noivern and ran to Eleanor. She lifted Eleanor's head off the ground placing it on her lap. She noticed the tear stains on Eleanor's face and frowned. She was confused on why she was crying, based on her phone call with Eleanor's friends...the split up seemed neutral and friendly. Not only that..what could have made her pass out?
She tensed up when she noticed Eleanor groan. She watched as the girl on her lap blink her eyes open and she let out a sigh of relief to see that Eleanor was okay.
"H-how did you get here??" Eleanor asked her friend clearly confused on how she found her. She then realized she must of passed out from over stressing and sat up slowly. She noticed the slight pain in her head that formed into a headache and groaned.
"Take it easy slithead. Now do you want to explain to me what are you doing napping in the middle of the woods?" Victoria asked sarcastically as she crossed her arms.
Eleanor rolled her eyes at her friend's words then dusted herself off. "I wasn't napping...I passed out...from..." she paused as she sighed. "I guess I've just been stressing a bit too much lately and it got the better of me." Eleanor crossed her arms and pouted as she kept her gaze to the ground.
"Like I said you gotta take it easy, you're such a worry wart. Learn how to not overthink in that little head of yours." Victoria plucked Eleanor's head.
"Ow!...And do you think I want to stress over everything!? I want to not have to worry about anything! Like how a group of bad guys messed with my memory, the next showcase, master class, Ash, last gym battle, and the pokemon league!" Elenaor screamed out frustrated with herself and her life and just held her head in her hands.
Victoria frowned at her friend till she stopped thinking over what she just said. A playful smirk came to her lips as she looked at her friend. "Did you just say...Ash?" Victoria asked and Eleanor gasped covering her mouth blushing deeply.
"You're hilarious Lynn, you like the boy..so what? It's how nature of the world works. People like people and want to date them. It's not the end of the world..." Victoria shrugged as she sat beside her friend who was still hiding her face. "Now for the other things...you have to not let yourself get overworked. You're a great trainer, and a great performer you'll do fine Lynn...I know you will." Victoria smiled. Eleanor pulled her hands away letting Victoria's words sink inside her. She nodded agreeing to what she was saying and sent her friend a grateful smile.
"Thanks for letting me vent, it felt good. Now what I wanted to ask was...how did you find me?" Eleanor asked and Victoria smirked.
"That my friend is a secret...Alex and I have a surprise for you...come on." Victoria gestured for Eleanor to follow before climbing on her Noivern. Elenaor did the same and they flew off.
Eleanor frowned when she saw a familiar castle and started to shake her head. "Oh no..I am not going there..you can't make me go there!" Eleanor started to protest while Victoria ignored her friend and Noivern landed behind the castle.
"Why am I here!? We are not going to the party!" Eleanor snapped crossing her arms.
"Yes we are!" Victoria argued.
"What's with the arguing...did you not tell her?" Alexandra came up with two big clothing bags in her hands.
"You're a part of this?" Eleanor frowned at Alexandra who nodded.
"Relax we are not here to sabotage the party...but we are here to have fun." Alex said shaking her hips in a circle as she laughed.
"They'll recognize us." Eleanor said and Victoria chuckled.
"We have used masks before....I told you I made a couple of calls earlier. I called Aria..and she persuaded Pierre to turn the party into a masquerade. Everyone will be wearing masks so it's all fine." Victoria patted Eleanor on the back who let out a sigh of relief. She played with her hands looking down at them as she debated if she wanted to go along with the plan. She let out a sigh as her shoulders slumped.
"Alright fine...I guess we can go." Eleanor said and her two friends squealed.
"There is a celler that we can go through...this place has tough security in the front...so we would have to sneak in. What's good for us is that this place doesn't have security cameras." Alexandra winked.
"Aren't you excited? You get to see your...boyfrienddddd." Victoria exaggerated while laughing and Alexandra gasped.
"She finally admits to her crush for the raven-hair kid?" Alex asked jokingly and Victoria nods.
"She sure did. Now let's get pretty!" Victoria said as she was the first one to go through the cellar. The rest followed and it lead them to a rusty basement.
"Its not much but we can make it work." Alex said as she set up a makeup station with her make up bag and travel mirror. Victoria brought out all the hair supplies she thought they would need, she then smiled as she brought over a bag for Eleanor.
"Already picked out your dress. You're going to love it....oh and there is definitely an outfit change...when you want to bust a move." Victoria winked at Eleanor who shook her head but couldn't hide the blush on her face. Once Eleanor tried on the red dress that was picked out for her she gasped loving how it hugged her waistline and was such a beautiful ball gown.
"I knew this day was coming for a while, your mom had a part of this plan...she sent that dress to you." Alexandra said as she watched Eleanor twirl a few times.
"I'll have to call her after the party." Eleanor said in a giddy tone, not being able to take the smile off of her face.
Eleanor was set in a beautiful red dress, Victoria was in a unique multi-colored dress, and Alexandra was in a beautiful yellow dress. The three girls all did their hair and makeup so elegantly that they looked like real princesses. Eleanor rests her hands on her stomach as she felt the nerves eating her alive. Her two friends stood beside her and place their hands on her back.
"You'll be fine..we have did this many times before." Alexandra said to comfort Eleanor.
"Yeah, and we're going to be with you through the whole way. Let's show them how real fashionistas work it." Victoria said walking first.
They all managed to sneak onto the main floor where other performers were waiting to enter the dance hall. The only people allowed in first were the plus ones. The double doors opened and each performer took their chance to walk in as if it were a runway. Each performer entered the ballroom all dressed elegantly and wearing masks. Eleanor was the last to go in catching everyone's eye. Her dress drew in people's attention, it stood out...it was a simple but yet beautiful dress. In the middle of the dance floor was Pierre and Aria doing the basic introductions. They had the first dance before letting everyone else take over.
Eleanor lost Victoria and Alexandra in the crowd which was really annoying because being alone at a party sucked. She noticed the group and gasped. She saw Serena in a...red dress?? "Oh that's just great." Eleanor whined. Ha so much for standing out. She walked towards everyone and smiled once she was close enough.
"Hey guys!" Eleanor said lowly to the group who gasped once they saw her. They all pulled her in separate hugs.
"We thought something bad happened to you." Clemont said.
"Yeah, we heard you passed out." Serena said in a dull tone. She was clearly upset about Eleanor wearing a red dress as well and the little bit attention that Ash had on her was now gone. All his attention was on Eleanor again.
"I did, but I'm fine...just need rest, but I didn't want to miss coming here with all of you. You guys look amazing. Serena great minds think alike huh?" Eleanor said with a challenging smirk. Everyone knew Eleanor's signature color was red, so to see Serena wear red made her feel out of place, but she was going to show who looked best.
"Yeah they sure do." Serena said looking like she wasn't going to back down. Eleanor chuckled before looking back at the dance floor.
"I don't know about you guys, but I'm so ready to dance." She said as she twirled her dress spinning dramatically as she turned. She turned back to everyone reaching her hand out for Bonnie.
"Care to have this dance?" She asked Bonnie who nodded happily. Bonnie took her hand, and Eleanor lead them both to the dance floor where both Victoria and Alexandra were at dancing. The four of them dance soon being joined in by the rest. Eleanor got lost into the music letting her worries leave her mind as she became part of the song. Her body moved to the rhythm before it all stopped.
"Switch to a dance partner that you did not arrive with." Pierre announced and everyone joined into pairs. It became a circle of dancing as everyone took turns while swaying to the beat. Eleanor switched up with many guys just goofing off having a great time. She switched to her next partner who happened to be Ash.
"Having a good time?" she asked high on adrenaline and excitement. She couldn't contain the smile on her face as she took lead into the dance, not even nervous that she was dancing with Ash.
He seemed nervous and he sighed. "I just can't get the hang of dancing...and these clothes are itchy." He whined which made her laugh. She looked at him up and down while biting her lip seeming impressed by his outfit. She looked away knowing she was probably blushing then looked back at him.
"It's not that hard once you know how, and you look amazing..plus it's only for a little while Ketchum." Eleanor giggled as she helped him get into the right stance.
One hand on her waist and the other holding her hand. She pressed their bodies closer together till nothing but probably a piece of paper could fit between. She looked up and she hadn't realized being this close meant that their faces would be that close. Her breath hitched and she got a little nervous as she looked up into his amber-colored eyes. Nothing could ruin this moment, this moment right here proved what her heart was feeling....yes she did have a crush on Ash Ketchum.
"You just take one step at a time, till you get used to it. One step back then one step forward." She said below a whisper. Ash made the first attempt taking them both one step back, then one step forward. He seemed like he was trying hard and he clearly didn't want to mess up. Something in his head was telling him to not ruin nor waste this moment.
Eleanor smiled as she was proud of his progress and helped by picking up the speed. She helped him twirl her around then come back to him. They waltzed around the ballroom just having fun. Eleanor squealed as she felt herself being lifted into the air. She looked down at Ash to see him beaming with smile.
"I thought we could use a nice stunt." He winked and she laughed sticking her arms out until he dropped her only to catch her bridal style spinning them both. She jumped down and both Alexandra and Victoria stood beside her. They grabbed a part of her waist pulling it off letting Eleanor be in her new outfit change.
"Dance your hearts out!" Victoria called out before Alexandra placed her hand over Victoria's mouth while dragging her away. Both Eleanor and Ash laughed as they watched the two before getting back into dancing which was much easier now that her dress was shorter.
"Is Ash Ketchum a pro dancer already?" Eleanor joked and Ash rolled his eyes as he spinned Eleanor before pulling her back.
"I guess I am, I have a really good teacher." He said. Before he looked over noticing the song was about to end. So he did the most surprising thing he could do...he dipped her.
The music fades and everyone applauded as Pierre was going to announce the next activity. Meanwhile both Ash and Eleanor were frozen in place. His hand was on her hip and thigh as he was lifting her back up and she had her arm around his neck. She never looked away from his eyes as now they were both standing. She glanced from his lips to his eyes and Ash did the same. Eleanor smiled then looked away.
"I had fun dancing with you..." Eleanor said about to walk away but he took a grip of her wrist and shook his head.
"W-why are you walking away?" He asked.
"I just need a minute...please." She gave him a reassuring smile before turning away pulling her wrist out of his hold and tried to leave the ballroom. Both Alexandra and Victoria noticed so they follow after her.
"Is Cinderella running away? I'm confused?" Victoria asked and Alexandra gasped.
"Does that mean we are the ugly stepsisters?" Alexandra placed her hands over her face dramatically.
Eleanor rolled her eyes turning back. "I am not Cinder-..." Eleanor gasped as her shoe came off as she stumbled a bit then pouted as her friends giggled at her.
"It's a sign you know." Alexandra winked and Eleanor groaned leaving the ballroom once more.
Alexandra grabbed the shoe following after Eleanor both Victoria following. "What's the hurry? What happened?" Alexandra asked.
Eleanor pushed the girl's bathroom door opened and stumbled inside she rests her hands on the counter of the sink and stared at her reflection. Her chest was rapidly moving as she tried to control her fast pace breathing. She was in a panic for some unknown reason and she just wanted to think straight.
Alexandra and Victoria walked in and noticed Elanor having some sort of panic attack, so they ush to her side. "Lynn, breath just take deep breaths." Alexandra ordered Eleanor who nodded and started taking deep breaths. She closed her eyes concentrating while taking deep breaths, and it seemed to be working.
"Care to explain what the heck is going on?" Victoria asked abruptly her eyes filled with worry as she frowned at her friend.
"I-I...don't...k-know.." Eleanor panted standing up a little straighter and paced the bathroom.
"W-we were just dancing....it was beautiful....and just magical. I feel like we were going to kiss at the end, but I couldn't." Eleanor runs her fingers through her hair.
"Why not?" Alexandra questioned.
"I don't know what he feels for me. A kiss would of probably ruined our friendship and I don't want that.. Ughhh it's just hard with the feelings..all of the feelings..whatever feelings..were..just..too much!" Eleanor yelled and held her head as she continued to pace.
"We should of let you handle whatever you were going through, before taking you to a party. Whatever is bothering you Lynn, you have to let it go..." Alexandra said.
"That's the thing! I don't know why I'm getting so worked up! It just happened out of no where!? I was fine...until..." Eleanor stopped walking, and her eyes widen a little as her mind went instantly to Team Flare. That was the trigger....ever since she found about wha they did her mind has been all over the place. "Nevermind." She said as she looked at her friends.
"I know I have to work on controlling my thoughts, with liking Ash, the showcases, the pokemon league. I know I'll get through it all. There's just one thing I have to get through...alone." She smiled pulling her two friends into a hug. "Thank you both for being here for me, but I really need to make an important private phone call." Eleanor smiled as she took her shoe from Alexandra placing it on, then left the girl's bathroom.
Both Alexandra and Victoria looked at each other before shrugging. They left the bathroom to rejoin the party.
A figure walked out of the bathroom stall with a frown on their face. Clearly the three girls didn't know that someone was in the bathroom when they were talking. The figure fixed their dress staring at the mirror with a shocked expression on their face. They walked out of the bathroom with a wicked grin on their face and joined the party.
Once Alexandra and Victoria got to the party they stopped as they noticed a battle had just finished. Alexandra then gasped pulling on Victoria's arm as she pointed to the top of the staircase to see management.
"We have to get to Eleanor, and get out of here." Alex whispered and Victoria nodded.
"I have a weird feeling in my gut...let's go find her." Victoria gave Alexandra a push amd the both of them left the ballroom to the hallway. Alexandra pulled out her phone calling Eleanor but it kept going to voicemail. Alexandra grunted while her hand was gripping her phone tight as she got frustrated.
"She's not answering." Alex groaned.
"She said something about a private phone call...she's probably outside." Victoria said and the two girls ran down the hall to get to the main lobby but stopped as people in uniform came out of no where standing still in front of them.
"You're not going anywhere." The lady with purple hair laughed. Alex and Victoria start to back up but bump into something which happened to be more people in the same uniform.
"Let us leave or else!" Alex shouted pulling out a pokeball and Victoria did the same.
"Or else....what?" The woman taunted with a wicked sounding laugh with a Manetric by the woman's side.
Suddenly the two girls get shocked by the Manetric making them both pass out.
Two ex-Kalos Queens down.....
Meanwhile Eleanor was outside the castle trying to make that phone call. She waited for an answer but there was none. She tried sending a few texts but she never got a response. She stared at her phone confused then her eyes widened as a hand covered her mouth and felt someone pulling her back.
Another ex-Kalos Queen down.
Will they be saved??
Who knows.....but the world within the pokemon showcases has gotten a whole lot more..interesting.
ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ's ɴᴏᴛᴇ:
ʜᴇʏ ɢᴜʏs!
ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ!
ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ғᴏʀɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴘʀᴇss ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇᴀᴜᴛɪғᴜʟ ᴠᴏᴛᴇ ʙᴜᴛᴛᴏɴ! ᴡᴇ ɢᴏᴛᴛᴀ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴠᴏᴛᴇs ᴜᴘ!
ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ғᴏʀɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛ! ɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ʜᴇᴀʀɪɴɢ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ's ʟᴏᴠᴇʟʏ ғᴇᴇᴅʙᴀᴄᴋ!
ᴀʟsᴏ, ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ғᴏʀɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏ sʜᴀʀᴇ ᴀɴᴅ, ᴀᴅᴅ ᴛʜɪs ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ʟɪsᴛ!
ᴇᴅɪᴛᴇᴅ ʙʏ VeryLazyEve
ᴜɴᴛɪʟ ɴᴇxᴛ ᴛɪᴍᴇ!
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