Chapter 1
I only heared the the sound of my heavy panting breath and the crunching of twigs and leaves my bare feet were making. I was in the forest running from him.
It's so cold, I thought, goosebumps rising everywhere on my body as the freezing air harshly caressed my pale skin. I felt as if all my toes and fingers gotten frostbite. My sore throat was burning from inhaling too much of the icy air. My lungs felt as if they were going to collapse any second now. I don't think I can go on much further. My legs were aching painfully due to their continous excessive movement.
Run! Don't stop!
My father's strong voice demanded. The memory of his voice interrupting my almost attempt of resting for a few minutes. I kept repeating my father's last words in my mind, mentally urging my body to keep on going.
If I was wearing appropiate winter clothing instead of my thin, ivory nightgown I might've enjoyed the scenery before me. The numerous tress in the dark forest were covered in soft, white snow. Every few minutes the abundant frozen branches would leave an opening up above. Letting the full moon's glow guide me as my lantern as I ran from my predator.
Suddenly, I heard the man's laughter right behind me. Fuck, he caught up to me. Screaming petrifyingly of shock and fear as I turned around swiftly bracing myself for attack. But nothing was there.
He was here. I felt it. I began to frantically turn myself in circles. Waiting for him to pop out behind one of the thick trees.
I was only a mile away from a busy road. I could probably kick him where the sun doesn't shine or punch his nose and make a quick getaway.
Unaware of what was going behind me I heard a twig snap in the quiet night.
That wasn't me. Relax. That could've been a squirrel. It's okay. Just a harmless animal. Turn around and you'll see. I slowly turned around with my eyes closed. The suspense was making my heart jump aginst my chest furiously. I slowly opened my eyes and relaxed my stiff body. Letting out a soft breath. Just realizing, I was holding my breath.
Paranoid dumbass. I let out a small giggle. No way he could've catched up. I wasn't Lanston's Middle School's track star for nothing.
All of a sudden I felt a hot breath behind my left ear and a cool, sharp obect press against the base of my throat. An involuntary shiver of fear ran down my spine as he wrapped an arm around my waist. My body didn't feel cold anymore, it felt numb. My heart began to race faster than the suspense a few seconds earlier. Perspiration began to slowly form on my forehead.
"Boo." His hot breathe whispered by my ear, pressing his nose against my neck.
"Wake up." A familair cold voice hissed loudly, removing my warm blanket.
"Mom?" I squinted above me, still feeling disoriented, my eyes adjusting to the bright light.
"Where's my navy blue suit?" She asked sternly, tapping her foot impatiently on my wooden floor.
It was the same horrid memory that I kept on reliving for over almost two years now. Why does it keep on haunting me every time I'm asleep? When will it stop already? I've had enough of the sleepless nights already. I should run by the pharmacy after school today and buy me a stronger sleeping medicine. It seems like I was getting used to the one I bought a couple months ago . . .
"Well? Where is it?" She asked with cold eyes, crossing her arms on top of her chest still tapping the floor.
"I hanged it up in the hallway closet." I said quietly, averting my gaze from her eyes.
She just simply walked out of my room and slammed my door a bit more than neccessary making me flinch. When will that stop? I miss my mother. The one who would cheer me up by baking my favorite brownies. The one who used to braid my hair ever so gently. The one who would hug me tenderly if I was scared. Where was she? Where were her loving eyes? Maybe I should just leave. It's what she wants anyway. I was on the brink of tears again.
No! Get your self together Layla. She needs you now more than ever. Even if it seems like she doesn't . . .
Sighing, I looked at my alarm clock and saw the time. Oh no, I'm gonna be late! I quickly went to the bathroom and washed my face and brushed my teeth rapidly yet thoroughly. I briefly decided what to wear once opening my closet. I picked my favorite pale pink cardigan and picked whatever matched with it quickly. After brushing my long hair once I quickly grabbed my schoolbag and walked out of the front door step feeling the fresh, windy Monday morning. I wasn't worried about my hair tangling since it literally stayed pin-straight no matter what.
Shoot. Mom's BMW wasn't in the driveway. I really needed a ride today, though.
I sighed in annoyance as I locked the door and began my way to Jefferson High School. I only lived two blocks from it so I hastily walked my way. Butterflies started to erupt in the pit of my stomach when the school began to be more and more clear as I approached it. It was the second week of the new school year. I missed the first week since mom had a little accident and I had to stay home the whole week to help her get better.
Phew, I made it. There were other teenagers lingering around the front entrance so I wasn't too late. It seemed like the first bell hadn't rang yet, but I continued to walk hastily since the office was at the furthest part of the building.
I nearly squealed in excitement once I entered the building. I was pretty much a loner here last year. Not this year though, I am determined to make at least three--no, twenty-eight friends this year. I walked with a confident stride until I stepped on my shoelace and somehow slipped and fell directly on my butt. I winced in pain, rubbing my sore behind until I saw a small group of boys chuckling as they slowly passed by me.
"What a loser." One of them mumured making me blush.
"Stupid shoelace." I whispered as I quickly tied a knot and stood up.
Who am I kidding? I know I was way too timid then to even start a coversation with a complete stranger let alone someone in my own class. Heck, I should be glad if I at least make one friend. Seems like my sophmore year isn't going to be that different from last year after all.
I sulked the rest of the walk. I entered the small room that overly smelled of peaches making my nose wrinkle slighty in disgust. I walked up to the main desk where a short, hispanic woman who was typing at the speed of light, then stapling documents together afterward fax some paperwork all in the same chronological order. She sighed in annoyance as I frowned. I didn't want to disturb her. She look like she was way too busy with her job, but I had no choice. I didn't want to be in the awkward situation where you're the last person to enter the classroom and everyone looks at you as you walk to your desk.
"Um. Excuse me Miss." I murmured. I guess she didn't hear me come in because she dropped the stapler in shock.
"Are you okay?" I asked worriedly. It looked like it landed on her foot. I wasn't sure since the desk was so high.
"Yes, gracias." She smiled with perfect white teeth as she retrieved it .
"Te nada." I grinned. Well, I'm glad I took spanish last year.
"What can I do for you, mija?" She asked sincerly.
"I came to pick up my schedule. My name's Layla Hart." I beamed at the term of endearment. Yes, I'm very glad I took spanish last year. The smile had her taken aback for a second, but she responded with a warm smile.
"Of course. Just wait a moment." She quickly typed something on the computer and the printer began to make a few beeping noises. "Is that all I can do for you, mija?" She repeated, making my heart warm.
"Yes. Thank you." I grinned.
"Here you go." She handed me the thin paper as she walked out of the short gate at the side of the wide desk.
"Thank you . . ." I trailed off once I saw her huge pregnant belly. "Awwww." I cooed, beginning to unconsciously rub her belly. Her soft laughter brought me out of my trance.
"Oh my god. I'm so sorry." I gasped while blushing, removing my hands.
"No, it's okay. Go ahead." She insisted by taking my hands and putting them back on her swollen stomach. Immediately feeling the baby's kicking.
"Ah!" I shrieked. "Did I put too much pressure?" I asked alarmed.
"No. I guess she likes you very much." She giggled. That comment made me smile. Maybe I would get a friend very soon after all.
Intuitively, I kneeled down and rested my ear on her on the side of her tummy. I heard the quick movements of the baby making me gasp in wonder. The lady then gently placed her small hand on my head. For some reason, I instantly felt safe. Unthinkingly, I wrapped my arms around her, barely touching the other hand's wrist. Is this what it would of felt like like if my mom went the whole nine months instead of unfortunately having a miscarrige many years ago? I few of my tears leaked as the woman wrapped her arms around my head softly. My breathing began to become uneven.
"What's wrong carina?" She asked, her tiny hands grabbing the sides of my face and gradually making me face her. Her eyes were glistening and she was showing so much love and concern. Just like the true definition of a devoted mother. Oh no, I'm making an emotional pregnant woman cry. I read somewhere it's bad for the baby if the mother's going through too much of--as I liked to call it--an emotional roller coaster ride. What's wrong with me, I scolded internally.
"Es nada. No mas estoy feliz porque vas a ser una buenisima mama." I sniffed, standing up and rubbing my tears away.
"Gracias." She smiled warmly
"Adios. Have a good day." I squeezed the lovable woman making her laugh as she returned the brief hug. Oh dear, I was on a roll. I think I have two friends now. I turned around with glee on my face until the day came crashing down on me again. Me landing on my butt once again.
How long was this streak going to keep on going?
"Nice one, klutz." The husky voice of the person I bumped into said impolitely.
"I-" I began to apologize, standing up from the floor. But I stopped once I saw their breath-taking electric blue eyes. The person was only a few inches taller than me, so I didn't have to crane my neck. But what suprised me the most was that the rude person seemed to be lost in my eyes as well.
I don't know how long we were just gazing at one another's eyes, but I didn't want to stop looking. Their black eyelashes were so thick and long. The blueness of the eyes looked so alive. Such a pretty rare color, I wondered idly like a child.
"Are you okay, carina?" The woman asked.
"Yes." We both replied, bringing us back to reality. And just like that the first bell rang. Oh no, I bet I looked like a complete lovestruck idiot.
"I-I-I'm sorry." I murmured blushing like an idiot, looking down. "Bye." I said quietly as I swiftly walked out of the office.
Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why the hell did I stutter like an oaf. I didn't even get a chance to see the owner's face. My god he or she smelled so good. It was a sweet musky scent. I couldn't decipher if it was cologne or perfume.
Nevermind that. I touched that woman's belly without asking. And even held her. And cried for christ sakes! This day just keeps on getting worse by the minute. I looked at my watch. I had three and a half minutes before the final bell rang. I looked at my schedule and saw that my homeroom was luckily in the direction I was heading. I turned to the left on the next corridor and went up the stairs in a hurry.
Coincidentally, the girl's restroom was right across the hall of my designated classroom. I looked at my watch, I still had two and a half minutes left. I entered the the spacious restroom and walked directly to the sink. I turned the faucet and leaned foward as the cold water came in contact to my face. I grabbed a few paper towels from the side and lightly patted my face as I looked at the girl in the mirror.
She was pale, almost tranculent. Her platinum blonde hair went all the way to her hips. The only contrast she had of her ghostly appearance were her big brown eyes which weren't puffy anymore. Her thin, small nose had a cute, pink round tip at the end which led to a pair of thick cerise pink lips. The thin girl pressed a bony hand on of her smooth cheecks that had barely noticable high cheeck bones. She wasn't tall, barely passing at 5'3". She looked more like a porcelain doll than to be catergorized under sexy.
Sighing, I turned around and began to take a few steps, but the bell rang.
"Ah!" I shrieked. I quickly walked out into the hallway and noticed I wasn't the only student that decided to get inside the class until the final bell. Fortunately, there were other people that were walking inside my classroom so I wouldn't stand out as I walked inside and picked a random seat at the back of the class. The teacher wasn't here yet so I wouldn't recieve any harsh scolding for arriving late.
The room was quite big and held at least twenty-five desks and a teacher desk. I noticed there was a Mr.Garrazi neatly printed on the erase board up front. The room felt so cold. I shivered while I made my cardigan sweater more tighter around my torso.
I felt so left out. The teacher still hadn't arrived yet so the other kids were hanging out with their group of friends. Talking about what they did on their first weekend since school started. Or what they did over the summer. Just a normal conversation with a another human being which I craved.
There are a few other people I know from last year that are in this class. Like Cassandra, she's the most sweetest person ever I'd ever meet. Or Mathew, he's pretty funny. I would know because we worked as partners during a lab in biology last year. He's a nice guy because he never made me do all the work like people before him had. But pityfully, I was too reserved to get up, walk over there and start a conversation with them. Even though they greeted me when I walked by them.
Other students were still walking in so the desks were gradually becoming more filled. It looked like nobody seemed bothered where I was sitting, so I didn't move.
Until Lacey Walker stepped in. Oh no! She was a senior this year and the 'queen bee' of the school. I've heard that she was a bitc-, well, a very cruel person. I'm not the type to believe in rumors, but I've witnessed it first hand. She publicly humiliated Cassandra's older sister last year, Abby--who at the time was a senior--just because she was overweight.
She walked with a determined, elegant stride making a few guys gaze at her in interest. She really was beautiful. Light brown hair in soft curls. Tall slender body with curved hips and perky, round breasts. Breasts? Hips? Have I always been this so observant of people? Eh, I mentally shrugged. I'm always alone or either done with my work before others, so what else do I have to do.
She didn't stop until she was in front of my desk. She stared at me with a confused expression as I glanced back at her with a curious gaze. What did I do? Was this her seat? Of course it was. Why else would she stop in front of me? Unless she was going to embarrass me out loud for no apparent reason . . . .
Quick on my feet I stood up, "I'm sorry, I didn't know this was your seat." I softly mumbled picking up my schoolbag, blushing. Before I took my third step her hand got a firm grip on mine.
"Wait!" She exclaimed making me jump in fear. She also received a few curious bystanders eyes. She cleared her throat a few times after they went back to their own conversations.
"What's your name?" She asked.
"Layla?" I answered softly though it sounded like a question.
"Layla." She repeated. "What a lovely name." She murmured to herself.
"Thank you." I blushed, averting my eyes down. I noticed she was still holding onto my hand tightly and her thumb was gently rubbing the back of my hand. I guess she was soothing me from scaring me with her shouting. She followed my gaze and instantly let go of it as it was something dirty, her face changing into a repulsed expression.
Well sheesh, I know not all my clothes are designer brands like yours, I thought darkly.
"I'm sorry I took your seat." I murmured, turning around.
"I said wait goddamit!" She roared, putting a hand on my shoulder. Everyone in the room stopped what they were talking about and turned their heads towards us. I blushed beet red.
"What are you looking at?" She snapped. I guess she lived up the title as queen bee since everyone went back to their conversations. Though she received a few glares and mumbled curses.
"Yes?" I asked. Or should I say squeaked. My shoulders automatically hunched making me look smaller than what I already was.
"You can sit here, if you want." She said bashfully. I was laughing hysterically inside my head right now. I nearly pee'd my pants in fright but all she wanted to tell me was that I could stay in the seat I was already in.
"Thank you . . . Lacey." I smiled, I don't think she was suprised I said her name since everyone at school knew it. I guess she wasn't as mean as everyone made her to be. But she just stood there, taking me in with her eyes.
"Umm." I was sort of uncomfortable under her stare. She's a very intimidating female.
"Is there something wrong?" I asked curiously. That seemed to snap her out of it.
She just simply made a 'hmph' noise and walked back to her friends on the other side of the room. I wonder if she has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder yet?
The teacher finally came in through the doors making everyone go to their seats. It was a chubby man in his late fifties and wore an average looking suit.
"Good morning class. Sorry I came late. Very urgent paperwork that needed to be done." He said happily. It's good to know there are teachers who enjoy doing their job.
"Now, I know none you of did the homework I assigned to you over the weekend," He began, making the class snicker. "However, I would like for you to get a sheet of paper and writing untensil. And please, no lipgloss this time. You know who you are." He warned half-heartedly making the whole class snicker again.
"Before I begin with today's short lesson I'm going to do roll call." He went to the desk in the far right corner and turned the computer on. While everyone was waiting for the ancient monitor to start up they all quietly continued their conversations.
I suddenly got the feeling somebody was watching me. I turned my head slowly, but I didn't meet anybody's eye until I landed on Lacey's grey eyes. Her once soft eyes instantly turned into a deadly glare making my eyes grow wide in fear. I quickly diverted my eyes to my hands on my lap. I became transfixed on how colorless my small hands were. The palms had a faint pink color and a tiny scar at the bottom of my left palm. It was the only visible scar I had on me since most of my scars turned white like me.
"Ms.Abato."
"Here."
"Ms.Acker."
"Here."
I wonder how many times I fell off my bike. Or the jungle bars. Or my favorite tall tree in the nearby park from my house. I'm suprised that this was the only one that actually showed. I still remember how I got it so clearly.
"Mr.Cabatu."
"Here."
I went fishing with my dad. I think I was six at the time. He had a big box full of different types of hooks. There were so many colors, I remembered thinking. He had warned me not to play with them, but I was a stubborn child. Too bad I never listened. The cut had felt so excruciating but I was probably over exaggerating since I was a crybaby. He had put on a hello kitty band-aid and kissed it to make it better. We went out for icecream afterwards. I remeber I asked for a strawberry and vanilla swirl and he got rocky road. He read my favorite children's book for me that night.
"Pssst." Cassandra whispered, a couple of desks in front of me.
"What?" I asked quietly, confused.
"He's calling you."
"Huh?"
And right on dot the teacher said, "Ms.Hart?"
"Present!" I squeeked out loud making the whole class erupt in soft laughter while I blushed.
"She's a coward and deaf!" Lacey insulted while giggling making the whole class laugh even harder. Why were they laughing? It wasn't even that funny. Then why was my eyesight turning blurry?
"Ms.Walker, I won't stand for name calling." Mr.Garrazi warned.
"Awww, is the wittle baby gonna cwy? Ugh! You're such a fucking pussy." She said the last statement in a slow, sickeningly sweet tone.
"Ms.Walker!" Mr.Garrazi barked. "Hallway. Now!" He ordered, but the rest of the class made loud 'Ooh, Burn!' chants.
"Whatever." She muttered, rolling her eyes as she stepped out into the hallway.
Mr.Garrazi sent an apologetic smile before stepping out as well. Ironically, all eyes zoomed in on me making me squirm.
"What the hell did you do to Ms.Queen Bee?" The boy in front of me asked.
"What do you mean? I didn't do anything."
"Well, obviously you did something to her to make you her next victim." He rolled his eyes.
"Victim?" I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.
Suddenly the door opened and Mr.Garrazi appeared. "Can you please come here, Ms.Hart?"
"You're in for it now." The boy said giving me pity.
I gulped as I stood up and carefully stepped my walk of shame. He closed the door behind me as I stepped out in to the eerily quiet hallway. I took a few baby steps back when I saw Lacey. Lacey looked like a reincarnated demon. Her cold, deadly eyes meeting my frightened ones.
"Apologize." Mr.Garrazi demanded. But she refused to correspond. "Ms.Walker, I will not repeat myself." But she just continued to burn me alive with her eyes, figuratively speaking. I hope.
"Fine. Have it your way. Come with me to the office then." He retorted, gently pulling Lacey along but she flicked her arm back to her side as if she could get a contagious disease.
"Ms.Hart, you can go back to class. I'll be there in a minute." He smiled apologetically again as he turned his head towards me while walking with Lacey. I nodded in return as I quietly walked back inside the classroom to my desk. I felt everyone's eyes on me as I walked in. A few of them asking questions out loud but I barely heard them in the background. I just sat down at my desk and leaned my head down on my crossed arms.
"Just leave her alone." Cassandra defended. Fortunately they did. Thank you Cassandra, I mentally thought.
Oh my lord. She hates me. She hates me. She. Hates. Me. Why though? I kept replaying our brief conversation. Trying to see if I offended her in any way. But I couldn't find one. Oh my god. She freaking hates me. I didn't do anything to her. Was I really her next victim? If it's going to be like this for the rest of the year I might as well transfer to a different class because I can only take so much public humiliation.
Shoot, I can't. The school's stupid policy for changing classes only accepts requests during the first week only of every semester. Oh no, I mentally groaned. If only my mother wasn't such a--Layla! I scolded internally. She is your mom. Don't blame this on her. I sighed making the wooden desk make a little fog. So, what then? I had to wait until January. I had the strange urge to cry right about now.
No, no Layla. Suck it up, your a big girl now. That's right, all you have to do is stay a good three meters away from her and make no type of eye contact with her whatsoever. You just have to wait until January. It's better to be with her for only a few months then the whole school year. I can do it. The school had 'A'-day's, 'B'-day's so I was only going to see her every other day. You can do this, Layla. And you have early release days, Thanksgiving break and Christmas break this semester.
And so what if Lacey Walker didn't like me. Besides, I'm sure she'll get tired of torturing me and get a new victim. I straightened my spine and let out a breath. I decided to not let it bother me, but why did I still feel uneasy?
Now that that's over with, what else could possibly go wrong?
Apparently, I spoke too soon because three other students walked in. Two boys and one girl. All three were howling with laughter, a few tears streaming down their faces. They looked like a slow scene from a movie, teenagers having the best time of their life in their perfect little lives. It looks like I wasn't the only one thinking that when I saw a few of the other students expressions.
And guess which one had the same electric blue eyes.