Sean’s POV:
The sound of laughter from the barracks brought me back from my thoughts. I stood there under the spray trying to get my heart under control. I hadn’t thought about that night in a long time. I could still feel the heat of McClane’s body and the taste of his skin. Swallowing hard I shut off the water and grabbed my towel. Going to the sinks I stared at myself in the mirror.
This meeting coming up couldn’t end that way. It didn’t resolve anything. It only made everything worse. I was determined to fix this before I left Parris Island as a Marine. I grabbed my toothbrush and was about to uncap my toothpaste when I felt someone staring at me. Turning I spotted Dover standing at the door watching me with frowning eyes.
“You’re hiding something.” He said. Damn… why is it so freakin’ easy for him to read me?! Applying the toothpaste to my brush I started to brush. Coming over he leaned his hip against one the sink next to mine. He’d shed his shirt and stood bare chest his arms crossed his broad chest. He stood there patiently while I tried to prolong my tooth brushing. When I couldn’t brush anymore I rinsed my mouth and wiped my face with my face cloth.
“You’re hiding something… what is it?” He asked. Clearing my throat I turned to Dover and stared at him in his eyes. Even though I was still thinking of McClane my eyes drifted lower down Dover’s chest. He stood there looking… lickable. Shaking my head I brought my eyes back up to meet his smiling ones.
“Like what you see?” He whispered. I could feel a blush coming. Clearing my throat again I turned back to the mirror and grabbed my comb.
“I’m meeting with McClane tomorrow night.” I said. I could see the smile on Dover’s mouth fall in an instant.
‘Well this conversation is starting off well.’ I thought to myself.
“Why the fuck would you do that? He’s a douche… he doesn’t deserve you man!” Dover hissed. Grabbing his arm I pulled him deeper into the shower room.
“I know McClane doesn’t have a great track record but I can’t ignore him—“ I started to say but Dover cut me off.
“Yeah the fuck you can! He’s screwed you over time and time now he’s here trying to make it up to you. Where the fuck was he four years ago? From all accounts you’ve been fine without him. Don’t let him come and destroy that piece of happiness you’ve managed to find for yourself.” Dover said. Shaking my head I smiled. Dover didn’t understand. There was more than forgiving McClane at stake. We were running in a circle and if we didn’t at least try we would never get out.
“I appreciate your concern but I have to meet him. You may not understand now and you probably never will but I have to do this.” I explained. Turning away Dover flopped back against the wall and hung his head.
“Whatever… do what you want.” He said. We stood there for a minute before the light dimmed then brightened.
“Lights out.” Dover said. Pushing off the wall he left me staring after him.
“Well that went as well as expected.” I muttered to my reflection. I knew Dover was just looking out for me. After spilling my guts him about the rollercoaster that is McClane I totally get why Dover thinks meeting him is the shittest idea known to man. But I refused to let this albatross around my neck hang any longer. We would resolve this even if it killed us.
Dover’s POV:
Ever since Sean dropped that bomb on me I’ve not been able to function. I wandered around base not paying anyone attention because my head was still stuck in that conversation. He was going to meet him tonight. Sean would be alone with McClane somewhere and he would fall for his charms and the chance to make him my own would be out the window.
Stopping in the middle of the road I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Depression began to weigh on my shoulders crushing me further and further to the ground. I needed to talk to someone but not just anyone. I needed the one person who understood me best. I needed my dad.
When I made it to his office I was shown in by his secretary and I sat there waiting for him to finish with his conference meeting. By the time he got there I’d damn near eaten off all my finger nails. Catching sight of this he stopped and looked at me.
“You look like shit.” He said closing his door behind him. Standing from my chair I went to him and hugged him. He didn’t ask any questions just hugged me back. We stood there for a long time before he pulled back and looked me in my teary eyes.
“What’s going on Dover?” He asked. Swallowing hard I tried to clear my throat but it didn’t work the first few times. When it did I told him everything. My dad sat me down on the sofa and sat beside listening while I literally poured out my heart to him. When I was finish I lay back and closed my eyes. My dad sat quietly beside me before standing.
“First let me get a cold compress for your eyes.” He said walking across his office toward his mini freezer. After laying it across my eyes he took his seat again.
“Second I’m about to say something you might not want to hear but I’m going to say it anyway. As much as you want something to happen with Sean he sounds like he’s not available. You can’t force yourself on him when he’s not over this McClane. He’s got to want you as you want him or you’ll end up getting hurt and I don’t want you hurt. You love with your whole heart Dover… you always have. It’s the best thing about you but it’s the worst thing about you too. You let everyone in and you end up hurt and confused and as a parent I never want to see my child experience that.
All you can do is be Sean’s friend. Be there when he needs someone to talk to. Support his decisions no matter how much you don’t agree. He’s right about one thing. He and McClane need to work out what happened before either one of them start trying to move forward. And as his friend you have to respect his decision.” I sat there tears clouding my vision once again. I hated when my dad gave me the hard truth. As much as I didn’t want to hear it I’m glad he said it.
As much as I crave Sean I wouldn’t be that friend that sabotages his chances with someone else. I had enough of that with Brian. That was one road I never wanted to travel down again. Taking the tissue box my dad held out for me I blew my nose until it was dry. I wouldn’t be a Brian. I wouldn’t block Sean away from McClane if he is Sean’s true love.
“I will not be the reason why Sean and McClane aren’t together. I want Sean to be with me because he wants it… but if he wants McClane then I’ll have to deal.” I said softly. Reaching over my dad took hold of my shoulder and gave it a squeeze.
“That’s my boy.” He said. Looking to him I gave him a smirk.
“Boy?” I asked raising my brow. Grinning he shoved my shoulder and stood.
“Sorry. What I meant was that’s my marine.”
McClane’s POV:
I’m hyperventilating right now. I can feel a cold sweat trickling its way down my spine as I sit here at the Watering Hole waiting for Sean to arrive. Panic… mind numbing, body trembling fear is the only way to describe what I’m experiencing. I wanted to bring Kate but she wouldn’t come. She said it wouldn’t be right for her to be there. After all Sean call and made the first move. I could feel my stomach grumbling at me but I didn’t trust myself to eat. I wasn’t one hundred percent sure I’d get through the meeting without hurling all over the floor. I was busying my hands with my napkin when the doors opened up. He stood there at the door his gaze traveling around the room until his eyes landed on me.
‘Inhale McClane.’ My conscience said to me. Taking a deep breath I stood as Sean advanced on me.
“Hey.” He said stopping at the other side of the table.
“Hey… have a seat.” I said taking my own. Sitting down I waited as the waitress strutted over and took Sean’s order. We sat in silence waiting for her to return with his beer. After she’d gone he took a long swig from it then lean back in his chair.
“We can’t keep doing this to one another. We need to figure out what’s up with us.” He said. Nodding I took my own beer in my hands and twirled it around a bit.
“I’ve been writing to you for the past four years. Of course I haven’t had the courage to send them but I’ve been writing. Instead of having you read all those letters I’m just going to say it… bear with me okay… I wasn’t ready for what happened in Fiji. Yeah I didn’t stop it but I wasn’t thinking with my right head. After I woke up and I saw you I panicked. I didn’t know that there was so much more… I’ve never woken up in bed with someone else before…
I mean if you don’t count Declan when he was little. I never let anyone get that close to me before. The fact you were the first guy I’d ever done anything with and then I woke up in a bed with you just… I wasn’t ready. Me ignoring and avoiding you was my way of coping. As fucked up as it sounds it was all I had.
I didn’t want to burden Declan with my problems because he and Micah were so fucking happy and no one else would have understood…. I kept it inside. I bottled it up and I let it fester and grow until I couldn’t function anymore. I was like a machine and I went through the motions but everyone I knew, I loved I pushed them away because I was ashamed of everything. I was ashamed of how I treated you. I was ashamed of how I treated Declan and Micah. How I hid from my parents when they came to talk to me. I didn’t know how to deal with… this. I spent three years trying to figure out how I could make this up to you and then suddenly you’re there…
I see you and I’m thinking I’ve got my second chance… only to have you disappear leaving me a note telling me karma is a bitch. I know I deserved it… I know it but… it hurt just the same. I’m tired of this. Even after all this I’m still confused. I’m still unsure about everything and I don’t want to lead you on because it’s not fair to you. I just want to try… that’s it.” Bringing my bottle to lips I drank my beer trying to get my tears under control. When I placed my bottle down Sean placed his bottle next to mine.
“My dad stop talking to me after I told him it was a chance I was maybe gay. That Christmas I saw you he’d left and gone because he didn’t want to be in the same house as me… a few weeks later he divorced my mom. He tells people he doesn’t have a son… I get it McClane. This is a first for the both of us… it’s not something that’s been brewing and slowly came to a boil. It happened so fast and neither one of us were ready. I understand how you feel and… even though it took this long I’m willing to try too. We’ll never know if we don’t try.” He said blushing a bit. I sat there stunned and a bit unsure what to say. I thought we’d have this long and drawn out thing and someone would storm out at the end but instead… this happened.
‘Why the hell was I so fucking scared about?’ I thought to myself.
‘Maybe because you left out how you’d been having sex with a Sean look-alike while drinking yourself to an early grave.’ My conscience said. Ignoring it I focused on Sean.
“So now that we’ve started this trying thing I have to warn you. Declan and Micah are here too. They don’t know about this meeting… and I’m not sure I’m wanting to tell them just yet. The only people who knows besides us are Katlin and… Dover.” He said. When he said Dover I felt my mouth frown up. Dover… he was the ass from the other night who gotten in my way. I didn’t like him… I didn’t like his attitude… I didn’t like his face… And I really hate the fact he’s important to Sean.
“So now what?” I asked trying to erase the image of Dover from my mind. Shrugging his shoulders Sean gave me a little smile.
“Let’s… let’s get to know each other.” He said. Scooting my chair closer I propped my elbows on the table and gave Sean a warm smile. After taking another swig of his beer he started telling me about his life. It felt good to hear his voice. To see Sean’s face right here in front of me and not on my phone or in my dreams. We were finally making progress and nothing was going to stop us.
Kate’s POV:
I stood outside peering in the window watching McClane’s meeting with Sean. I was happy there weren’t any chairs thrown or worse punches. They sat and talked like two guys catching up. Though this brought a smile to my lips it hurt to see it. Tried as I might I couldn’t stop myself from falling a little bit more for McClane. It’s not been easy for me finding a guy who saw past the looks and wanted to get to know the real me.
I’ve never had to pretend to be perfect with McClane. I’ve never had to be someone else with McClane. Hell, he’s seen me in the morning straight out of bed. If that isn’t friendship I don’t know what is. Between the late night talks, us going through our life’s history with one another I would have never looked twice at McClane.
‘Um… excuse me? Aren’t you forgetting that HUGE crush you had on McClane when you were in middle school or is my memory faulty?’ My conscience asked. Turning from the window I leaned back and closed my eyes. Of course I was trying to forget. He was the main reason why I turned into Krazy Katlin. I wanted him to notice me so badly. What I told Declan was partially what happened but I would be damned it I told him his older brother was the reason why everything happened the way it did.
When it became apparent McClane would never see me in a romantic light I started searching for my own McClane. Enter Micah… he was everything McClane was. I knew if I played my cards right I would like Sasha and I would be immortalized as one of the most popular girls to ever graduate. Then the drugs took over and shit when downhill fast. I’m just glad I hit bottom when I did or I don’t think I would have made it to see my next birthday.
Now I’m sober and clean. I’m ready to find someone to love me for me but I’m still hung up on McClane Crawford. I think no matter who I date I’ll always imagine them to be him. As unfair as it is to someone else to do that I can’t help it. The heart wants what the heart wants. Pushing off the wall I turned towards the waiting taxi. I knew as I watched them inside there was no need to fantasize about McClane any longer. The way his smile blossomed on his face when Sean spoke to him told me all I needed to know… He wanted Sean and there was nothing I could to change that.