Chapter 37: Monday Blues
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WALKING OUT OF THAT foul-smelling room was easier than getting in and I've never been thankful to breathe fresh air. The same guard who accompanied me and George earlier was there to escort me back and I thanked him by smiling. Hindi ko alam kung paano nakakatagal ang mga tao sa ganitong lugar. I mean the smell alone is enough to bring waters to my eyes and I certainly don't want to go back in there and smell the same kind of hell. Hindi pa ako nakakapasok sa mismong kulungan pero parang ayoko nang tumuloy doon. A chill ran down my spine from the unwelcome thought.
"Prim!" tawag ni Amanda nang malagpasan ko ang booth na kinaroroonan niya.
"Yes?"
"George left this here before he went home," she said handing me a paper. I eyed the note suspiciously then at her, already dreading what the content would be. The last time George gave me a note, it had been his number in it and I remember tossing it in a trash bin.
"Uhm, hindi ko binuksan yan. Promise," awkward na sabi ni Amanda nang hindi ko pa tinatanggap ang note sakaniya.
I shook my head and smiled at her. "Of course. Thank you."
Tinanggap ko ito atsaka nagsimulang maglakad palabas ng opisina. Napagpasiyahan kong sa bahay ko nalang ito basahin dahil hindi ko pa alam kung dapat ko bang sabihin kila Sam na nagkita at nagkausap kami ni George dito. That would freak them out knowing someone had seen me here but that seems like the least of my worries right now.
I scowled at the rays of the sun as I stepped outside. The sun was very mocking compared to the dark hallways I had just been in. I turned round a hidden corner, away from the line of sight at the entrance. Sam must have felt the need to hide so far.
"So how did it go?" Sam asked, his voice raw from disuse. Well, he is indeed uncharacteristically quiet today and it was worrying.
I settled safely in the back seat as he prepares to drive us back. "It went well."
"Iyon lang?" Rylie gaped. "You owe us details."
I rolled my eyes, annoyed. "No, I don't. But since I'm nice, I'd tell you anyway."
Sinabi ko sakanila kung anong nangyari sa loob. Leaving George's participation and some personal conversation of me and the mayor about Jack, they seemed to be okay with how it went.
"I got a problem with the booth though," I remember, thinking how I'll explain this part of the story without mentioning George's help. "Amanda, the girl from the reception, won't let me in. She said I had to have some sort of permission from the family lawyer?"
"Oh," Sam said, his voice small. "Oo nga pala. Nakapasok nga pala kami dahil kay Atty. Brian."
"Yeahㅡyou overlooked that part," walang emosyong sabi ko.
"Hindi nila tinanong ang pangalan mo?" nagtatakang tanong ni Rylie.
"They did. At kung maghihinala man sila, kailangan ko pa rin i-deny kung sino ako. I can't go in there parading my name... if that's what you expected me to do."
Rylie's confused frown stopped me from leaving the conversation at that when a realization dawned on me. "Oh my God! You did it, didn't you? Alam mo na hindi ako makakapasok pero pinapunta mo pa rin ako sa loob ng mag-isa dahil inaasahan mo na gagamitin ko si papa para makapasok. Are you crazy?"
She didn't deny it but she didn't admit it either. Instead, she shrugs and looks up front. Marvelling her stone cold heart and knowing I'm at the upper hand now, I continued. "Funny. Kanina mo pa ako pinaghihinalaan na papalpak pero ikaw rin pala itong bubulilyaso sa plano."
"Oh my God, Prim. Stop, okay? I know you liked winning but you're wrong this time," she said, rolling her eyes.
"Right. You'll say I was assuming when you can't even explain yourself," I mumbled sarcastically. "Just the Rylie types."
"How did you get in anyway?" she asked, challenging me.
"Do you think I'm that stupid to trust you again?" I asked dubiously. "Don't you even remember what I said during Moby's birthday? I saidㅡ"
"Ladies," Sam warned, looking at us through the rearview mirror. "Let's all calm down, okay?"
"Then you should've made your friend act civil, Sam. She's been very disappointing," I snapped.
"Wow. See, lumabas rin ang tunay na anyo mo. Judgmental, fake andㅡ"
"What did you say?" I asked, my voice rising. "I wouldn't have said that if you weren't being a bitch!"
"What?! Bitchㅡ"
"Please, stop! I won't have you two fighting in my own damned car!" Sam hissed at the both of us. This will be the first time Sam ever raised his voice at me. Now I get how he managed to make George's face bruise overnight.
I pursed my lips, adrenaline gone just as fast as it arrived. I can hear Rylie breathing loudly but I don't care about her. I'm mostly worried about Sam and the worries I caused him today.
"Sorry," I told him, lightly pressing my palm in his arms. I tried not to distract him but it didn't work. "I shouldn't haveㅡ well, don't worry. Matutulog nalang muna ako."
He nods at me through the rearview mirror and gave me a small smile. "I'll wake you," he promised.
I can't toss and turn, obviously, but minutes of trying to sleep and silence ran my remaining patience out. I wanted to open my eyes and watch cars drove by but that would make things more awkward. At least, dito hindi namin kinailangan mag-usap kasi akala nila tulog ako. I justㅡ I never expect her to have so much hate and judgment towards me. I honestly didn't give her reasons and she didn't give me one.
"You know, you really should stop antagonizing her like that," Sam whispers to Rylie, thinking I was asleep. "She's going through so much already and you aren't really helping with your snarky attitude."
"Oh, shut up, Sam. I know about your favoritism issues."
"Favoritism issues?" he asked, amusement evident in his voice. "Ano naman iyon?"
"Tumigil ka nga. Kanina pa ako asar sa iyo," she huffs a breath. "You're supposed to side with me since we're friends, not the other way around. It's comical really. She is the bestfriend of the woman who hurt you."
"Oh, it's about Rose, then?" he asked. "Prim is my friend, if not my neighbour, before she even became Rose's bestfriend. And now, she's dating my best friend. We're really close-knitted, if you ask me."
"And that's supposed to help everything?" Rylie scoffed. "She's so annoying and prissy. Too fragile for us."
"What exactly annoys you about her?" Sam asked, confused. I found myself sitting up, still acting asleep as I try to eavesdrop more of this conversation. "Hindi naman ito tungkol kay Jack, hindi ba?"
Tungkol kay Jack? What about him? Is there a history between them? Kung oo, bakit walang nasasabi si Jack sa akin? I know I'm not his first girlfriend, hell, maybe he's not even a virgin but that doesn't mean keeping his exes from me is okay. Especially close friend ex-girlfriends.
"What? No!" Rylie laughs, fakely, in that annoying voice of hers. "That's old school, Sam. What's this? A throwback?"
Sam laughs with her and I can almost see him shrugging, like he always do when embarrassed. "Hindi... pansin ko lang kasi. Simula nung sinabi sa atin ni Jack ang feelings niya tungkol kay Prim, parang naging malamig ka na sakaniya. It's a good thing Prim's a really polite woman. Sobrang unfair din naman kasi yung treatment mo sakaniya. Remember Moby's party? You brought that to yourself too."
"Oh, come on. She should know that not everyone is supposed to like her."
One day I would really like to slap her. So hard.
"Maybe," Sam agrees. "But she's a nice girl. Give her a chance. Sobrang bait niyaㅡ"
Damn. No thanks, Sam. I can't ever picture myself being friends with a girl like Rylie. It would be the end of the world for me.
"Heck, no. Pasalamat siya at girlfriend siya ni Jack. Kung hindi, naku.. It's a bad thing already that Tito Des wanted to meet her too, you know."
"Sandali. Akala ko ba walang kinalaman si Jack dito? Bakit napasok siya sa usapan?"
She sighs and I hear a soundㅡ a sound when one punches a thing. It was soft but I still flinched in my side of the car. "Isa pa yan. So considerate."
"Bakit? Bumalik na naman ba iyong feelings mo sakaniya?"
Bumalik na naman ba yung feelings mo sakaniya?
Bumalik na naman ba yung feelings mo sakaniya?
Bumalik na naman ba yung feelings mo sakaniya?
Crush ni Rylie si Jack? No wonder. Kaya pala gusto nalang niya akong sunggaban pagka-nagkikita kami. Woah, how long was that even a thing? I remember seeing them inseparable and although Jack said it was nothing romantically for him, I realise now that it isn't nothing to Rylie, apparently. I feel a little smug and a little sad at the same time.
"Fine, you win this time," Rylie begrudgingly admits. "How the fuck did you know? Obvious ba masyado?"
"Nah, in case hindi mo napapansin, ilang beses mo nang sinabi na titigilan mo siya pero babalik rin naman."
"It isn't my fault, okay!" Rylie exasperatedly sighed. "Hindi ko rin naman gustong mamalaging ganito. Hindi pa nakakatulong na sobrang saya ni Jack ngayon. It's just.." she falters and I felt slightly conscious because I feel like she's staring right through me as she speaks her next words. "Ang unfair lang kasi. I was there for him longer than she ever did and yet... yet he chose to be with her."
"Still, it's bad to put all the blame to Prim, Rylie. Hindi rin naman niya kasalanan na siya pinili ni Jack. Christ, she doesn't even know that you like Jack."
Can this get a little less awkward? I feel like I'm reading someone else's diary and the worst part was I liked every single words of it. I know it's wrong but I didn't regret reading or starting it. In my case... hindi ko rin naman sinasadyang pakinggan ang usapan nila. Though, I do wish I could unhear it.
"Sam, it's ridiculous. They're not supposed to do well together. It's mental. They're terribly different from each other. I'm telling you, she probably doesn't care about him before that damned class they attended together."
"May I remind you? Andoon din tayo sa klaseng yun, and see, wala rin tayong nagawa," pilit ni Sam. I really have to give him credit. He's been nice and loyal to me as a friend and it makes my heart swell and feel honored. "Kung sana umamin ka nalang sakaniya bago pa siya magka-feelings sa iba."
Or maybe not, I thought, mentally rolling my eyes. What kind of advise is that, Sam?
She sighed. "Hindi ko alam, Sam. Sobrang dami ko nang nagawa para sakaniya pero paulit-ulit lang ako."
"I can't give you a sound advice right now... hell, to be honest, it would get you nowhere if you admit your feelings anyway. Jack has Prim now. Just leave Prim alone. Hindi siya sanay sa ganito, Rylie. Nakita mo naman kanina kung paano siya makipag-usap kay Jack, hindi ba?"
I heard Rylie hmmp-ed before I finally let sleep take over my already cloudy mind. Alam ni God na pwede naman akong mabuhay nang hindi nalalaman ang tungkol sa unrequited love ni Rylie kay Jack pero heto at talagang pinarinig pa talaga niya sa akin ang full-on admission ni Rylie. I drift off, feeling sad at her for the first time.
I didn't know how long Sam has been driving us but I certainly didn't expect that it would be this dark. I immediately groped for my phone in the dark car, squinting from sleep. I have one message from Jack that says, "Hey," but other than that, my call logs are empty. I sagged with relief and glanced at the time: 6:30 PM
"Oh, gising ka na pala," pansin ni Sam sa mga kaluskos sa likod.
"Yeah..." My eyes immediately travelled in the passenger seat and raised a brow when I found it empty. "Where are we?"
"Hinatid ko lang si Rylie sa trabaho niya. Malapit na rin tayo sa village."
"Uhm, do you want me to move?" I mumbled, nodding at the passenger seat. "You know..."
"Nah," Sam said, waving a hand at me. "Huwag na. Sobrang gwapo ko naman para mapagbintangang driver."
I snorted silently and gazed at the window instead. I don't know how to look at him after what I heard but it didn't help that I was with him alone. Hindi naman ako naiilang kay Sam dati. Ah, it was awful.
Minutes turned seconds and suddenly Sam pulled over in a familiar-looking gate. I cringed, realizing it was ours and grabbed my things. "Sam, thank you."
"Okay lang. Hindi lang naman si tito ang matutulungan dito. Pati si Jack na rin."
Again, kind words. And maybe it was because of that, that loyalty and kindness, that made me blurt suddenly, in a singsong voice. "Hindi. Hindi lang doon."
"Hmm?" he frowned.
"IㅡI accidentally overheard your conversation with Rylie..." I sighed, embarrassed. "I wasn't sleeping. At least at that moment."
He was silent for a minute, probably thinking of an alibi to get away from this. I don't know what a girlfriend should hear or not, or how a girlfriend should act when she accidentally hears a possible threat to their relationship but I'm not gonna start acting like a jealous girlfriend here. Not now, I mean.
I closed my eyes. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know."
He chuckles, small and low. "No one's supposed to. Even Jack, you see."
"Yeah. I figured. I'm really really sorry. Don't worry, it will die with me," I stated.
"No, Prim. It's cool. I was actually serious when I advised her to tell Jack," he admits then looks at me ruefully through the rearview mirror. "Sorry. I didn't mean it like that, but don't you thinkㅡ"
"I understand. Honestly, me too," sabi ko sabay bukas sa bintana ng kotse niya. Our garage lights were on, and the only unlit room in there was mine. Dad and my two brothers must be home then.
"Sorry about her."
"Hindi ko talaga siya masisisi, Sam. Tama naman kasi siya. Akala ko sila noon. I used to see them together, all the time, and maybe Rylie was right. If it weren't for Miss Nevada's class, we wouldn't have known each other." I sighed. "I wouldn't be here."
"Yes, but everything happens for a reason, isn't it?" he smiles at me. "Prim, don't worry about it. Jack... sobrang friendly niya lang talaga sa mga babae. It is an issue but he doesn't treat it as one, really. Minsan mabibigla nalang kami na may kasama siyang babae. For him that's completely harmless hang-out but for the girl... you get what I mean?"
"I can see Rylie is special to him, though."
"Maybe she is. Maybe she's not," then he turned to me. "But it won't matter to him. You're all he cares about."
"Not for long. It won't be. Not after he learns about this."
He turned toward the mirror, looking at the mirror, and his expression was unreadable. Tila ba nagtataka siya kung bakit ko nalang iyon nasabi.
"What?" I inquired.
"Do you think you can keep what happened today to Jack?"
His expression was soft. My shoulders bunched, I can almost feel the anxiety seeping through my bones. "I have to, Sam. If I wanted to keep him with me, at least."
"Don't get me wrong. Masaya ako at kinausap mo si tito. But I know Jack, he doesn't forgive easily."
I pursed my bottom lip and tried to calm my nerves. Why haven't I thought this thoroughly? Ayaw kong magalit siya sa akin pero wala rin naman akong choice kundi gawin iyon. God knows I only did this for him. God knows.
"Hey, hey. Sorry, forget about it," aniya na naghahanda na rin pauwi sakanila. "Kumalma ka lang. We will be with you when you finally decide to tell him."
"No, you're right. Sooner or later, I will have to tell him," I whispered, my voice sad. "Alone."
I started to walk into our gates, marvelling how so much had happened today. Some of them solved the mystery in my head. Some of them added into my already troubled mind. Some of them just remained to stay.
Papasok na sana ako nang maramdaman ang kaninang papel na nilagay ko sa loob ng aking bag. Nagtatakang kinuha ko ito at binuksan.
Hindi ko tuloy alam kung magagalit o matatawa ako ng makita ang nilalaman nito. It was a message long overdue. Or was it right to say number?
To be continued...