will be edited soon for: grammar, consistency of the story, respresenting MC character better
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I could have known; I should have known.
I always knew my aunt and uncle were different. Not only did they have mad fighting skills, they reacted differently to a lot of things. One day there was something missing from our shed, I think it was a shovel. As I hadn't taken it, my uncle went into protective mode real fast. He suspected someone had stolen it and guarded the garden for a while. It was strange to see him that way, as if death itself would visit us. That's how 'extreme' his protection was. I was pretty sure he would have shot the thief if there had been a real thief. But there wasn't. Our neighbours had taken the shovel to work on their garden. Apparently, they thought that in our close-knit neighbourhood you could just take things without asking. Well, you could, but from a house with two assassins? Not that good of an idea.
They also reacted differently death. Not that I saw them dealing with death on a daily basis, because that was actually what I expected they did. According to them they worked in the hospital after all. I knew they wouldn't completely freak out at the sight of blood, but I didn't think they would react the way they did when I got to see it first-hand.
One time there was a car crash a few Streets away. I was panicking till the point that I couldn't even breathe anymore. It remembered me of my parent's death too much. So, I was crying and screaming scaring all the people around me, it seemed like they were scared of my outburst. But Sarah, my aunt, knew exactly how to calm me. Her unusual calmness made me feel a bit better, scared still, but better.
They, even though my uncle didn't trust them, called the police and ambulance and helped some people at the same time. They were calm and serious and determined to help. My uncle helped the people who weren't really hurt out of the car. He stayed with those who were fully covered in blood and badly hurt. He gave them first aid, tried to save them. I thought they knew how to handle situations like this because they worked in a hospital. But there was something strange, even though they would have dealt with these kinds of situation as doctors, it didn't explain how fearless they were. How their eyes were completely void of emotions. That fear wasn't one of their emotions during all of this didn't surprise me as much as the lack of compassion they seemed to show. They were just helping people with blood all over as if it was nothing. As if it did nothing to them.
I was quite a bright kid. I knew they could be lying about their profession. I wondered if they were with the police, maybe special forces. But my uncle had always talked about the police failing at protecting people who really needed it. They clearly weren't cops. I hoped they weren't a part of the FBI or another dangerous job.
How ironic.
FBI or special forces were not even close to the danger they faced in their 'jobs'. They were trained assassins. A profession I didn't even know really existed. I thought that the assassins in movies didn't exist in real life and that it was some subsection of the FBI or other highly secretive job. I learned it wasn't like that soon enough. It was completely different.
First of all. As assassin you have a lot of dangerous enemies. All kinds of enemies, ranging from those looking for revenge because you killed someone, they needed for their business to those who lost their loved ones because of what you did. I believed that they only killed the bad guys, that's how I came to accept it when they told me. I pictured their targets as the most evil, dangerous people on earth. Murderers, rapists, cartels, gang leaders, serial killers, human traffickers. It made it a bit 'better' to see it as doing the world 'a favour' by removing the evil people.
Second. Their boss is an evil and heartless man, if you can even call that monster a man. His pseudonym being Mr Black. His agency truly is like a business, he got people working for him, he decided who to send to particularly missions, how many, at what time. He did the planning and they did the dirty work. As it's such a dangerous job he didn't really pay that much attention on the loss of his 'servants'. If one dies, finding replacement is his biggest concern. When he starts with 100 agents, and one dies, he would have the number to 100 in a matter of days as he has backup agents. Even when a whole team dies, he can create a new team as if he's playing the fucking sims.
And third. You can't have a family. Marrying someone when you were older is permitted. But almost no one survives to that age. The missions were dangerous, and you could easily be killed. How they survive that long? They said it all was about teamwork, your team kept you alive. In their agency there were teams. Teams of 2 people, sometimes 3. Sometimes 2 teams worked together, and you had 4 people. My aunt and uncle covered each other, never lost sight of each other. They always watched each other's back. They never went on a one man's mission. And that's the reason why they haven't died yet.
There were rules and one of them: it is forbidden to have children. If the parents died the kid would be alone. Don't think Mr. Black cares about a parentless child. No. Children who stay behind are a problem. Another problem to take care of. When a child stays behind people notice the parents are gone. And when they notice they're gone, there are going to be questions. The last thing the agency needs is attention. The big thing about the agency is that they must stay invisible.
Oh, and another reason why I officially can't exist is the child is a target too. Some enemies could kill the child in an act of revenge. The sudden murder of child is a problem too, making a big case for the police which could then perhaps lead back to the agency. Not that I really believed that, the agency was untraceable. But Mr. Black is a paranoid man.
My uncle told me all of this.
I didn't know why they decided to tell me back then, but the time was right. I had to know if I was planning to survive the next years to come. It confirmed that they were aware of my future, the only one who wasn't, was me.
To make things short, our conversation was ... a strange one.
"We have to tell you something.... I mean you've come at the age."
"Richard, I'll try to tell her."
"Eh what's going on here?"
"Honey, we're not doctors...."
"What do you mean.... you don't have some uhm weird job don't you. "
"No of course not. Well, actually it's not that normal. It's- "
"Just tell me?"
"We kill people."
"Sarah! It sounds bad if you say it like that!"
'Richard, do you even know what you're saying right now. Killing is Always bad."
"Sarah, I will explain this one."
That's when he explained everything. I didn't even say anything back the whole time; I was in shock.
I had a lot of questions and they answered all of them. I knew they wanted to tell me something else, but they didn't that day. I know what it is now. They also showed me an awesome car. With gadgets and that kind of stuff.
I wasn't allowed to drive in it. That sucked.
What they didn't tell me is the reason I lived the life I did. They never told me Black wanted me as an agent. They never told me I was going to live in an apartment with 2 other guys and they sure not told me a douchebag named Drew would join my team.
So, I didn't know what was really going on back then. I found out the day Mr Black took me away. It was 3 years ago but it could have been yesterday, the memory was so clear. But I remember every little detail about that day. From what I ate that morning to what I wore. Everything.
My uncle and aunt suddenly came bursting into my room in the middle of the night and asked me to come downstairs. Without saying anything more they disappeared. I was left with 1000 questions. Why did they want me to go downstairs? And why did they look rushed, nervous, terrified? It scared me because they never were terrified, never scared. They've seen too much to be scared of something. But they were that night.
After a few seconds wondering what had scared them I went downstairs. I had to face it. Whatever they were afraid of, I had to face it. Maybe it wasn't something scary. Or maybe my sister is back. That would be terrifying. She actually is terrible.
When I entered the living room, I just knew something was wrong. I felt the tension in the air. I saw my parents standing in the living room not saying anything.
"I hear the girl is here"
I didn't see someone else. I didn't want to look away from my aunt and uncle. But the harsh voice was from a man. I knew it for sure. They looked at me like they wanted me to do something. What did they want me to do? I had no idea.
When I finally turned my head, I saw a man in a black suit standing in front of me. He was tall, had dark hair, his face seemed to be in a permanent frown, he looked angry. That was not what scared me, it was his cold eyes. They were so cold that he didn't even seem human.
I tried my best not to take a step back.
"You. Come with me. No questions allowed"
I didn't know what to do. Did I have to go with him? I couldn't read the thoughts of my aunt and uncle. What did they want me to do? Just let me go? But the look on their faces told me they knew I had to go. They didn't want me to go but when Black asks something, he gets it. And he wanted me.
So, when I actually wanted to ask a million questions, not thousand this time I kept my mouth shut. Even though I didn't know this man, I knew his was dangerous, his whole aura was heavy and really, really scary.
My aunt and uncle gave me a look, nodding at me with sympathy in my eyes. But also, something else... something that must have been 'acceptance'. They knew this day would come, that's why they told me about their secret life. They told me because it was going to be the life I was going to live.
"Can I say goodbye to them?" I managed to choke out, as I felt a bile in my throat. I didn't want to cry but the grave expressions on their faces told me this was really bad. That I wouldn't see them again.
Mr. Black didn't allow me. He told me that questions weren't allowed and that I had to come with him. I wanted to run, to scream, to hug the people I had called parents these past 6 years. But I couldn't as Mr. Black pulled me with him. That's when I let go of the paralyzing fear and managed to yell a goodbye. "I don't want to go!" I had yelled. And that's when I saw them cry for the first time in 6 years.
They yelled back that they will never forget me. This was the last time I ever heard of them. The last time I ever saw them. Once again, the people I loved were torn out of my life, once again I was left behind. Not by death this time. Perhaps death got them too, they're agents after all and they're living a dangerous life. Besides, they were getting older, slower.
The explanation Black gave resembled to that. He told me they needed young people in training to become one of his agents. Young people who could run and move fast and were healthy. He knew an awful lot about me, he casually admitted that his men had spied on me since the death of my biological parents. I remembered the mysterious man in the forest at the party I went to just two months before I was taken away. If that really was one of Blacks men, then he showed himself on purpose. He must have, because Black's men are invisible unless they wanted you to see them.
Mr Black didn't explain further he never said a word to me, only threw me in a room until I accepted my new identity. I went from Chloe Walker to Chloe Rivas in just days and never went back. After, when I was 'ready' for my new home, I was put into an apartment with people I didn't even know. Let's say our first meeting didn't go that smooth...
Tom Donovan and David Williams would become my new family, my team.
David Williams was a 21 years old guy. When I came there, he was 19. He seemed a bit closed off; he didn't smile much making him seem quite harsh. His appearances didn't really help, it's not that he had an impressive height, in fact he was just 5 cm taller than me (something Tom likes to tease him about). No, it was his never smiling face, his dark eyes, his scars, his thick eyebrows which always seemed to frown. He intimidated me when I first met him. Also, because he had his arms covered in tattoos, according to him he wasn't even allowed to have them, he did in secret. Of course, when Black saw the sleeve, he threatened to burn his skin off. He never told me what really happened, and I don't think he ever will but at least it's not something like burning the skin off as his skin is still in one piece. But he must have been punished for it, you don't just get away with anything here.
He's really a sweet guy. He cooked for us that was kind of ironic because of the way he looked. But hey, never judge a book by its cover, you got to read it first. I know this man for three years, I live with him even, but I still feel like I've only read the first 5 chapters of the 500-page book that is David Williams. He is quite the mystery, which, I got to be honest here, made him attractive. But I learned not to think of them that way. He's like an older brother to me.
And then you have Tom Donovan. 18 years old. When I came, he was just 15. He wasn't really doing missions on that age, but he worked here already, training to become an agent. I think it's sick. Why would Black let a 15-year-old here? But when I asked, Tom didn't see it as a problem at all, he said that he grew up a long time ago, that he didn't even feel 15 anymore. Now that he's 18 he's not a boy anymore. He always was taller, more muscular than you usually see at the age of 15. But at the age of 18 he still looked like that one guy the girls swoon about. And with that I mean: handsome. He really was handsome. He's also quite cocky and sometimes a jerk the perfectly example of a 'high school boy' (don't tell him I called him that, he hates that nickname). We Always had a great bond, he felt like a little brother despite him being only 1.5 year younger than me.
With these idiots I shared an apartment and a lot of craziness. We went on missions together. With the three of us. Most teams consist of 2 but we had good teamwork, so we stuck together and formed a team of three. I never had a team of two before, so I was used to it.
The apartment where we lived was ...beautiful. We had a big couch and flat screen tv. A kitchen that had a lot of cool fancy stuff I never used. Also, a pool table, hot tub and 5 bedrooms. I think the agency has too much money. But a hot tub isn't something I would complain about. I think the agency was like 'with every mission you risk your life, maybe get injured or maybe not. So, here's a hot tub to make things right'. Hot tubs can fix a lot, like your relationship, but not the fact that we could die so easily.
When we didn't go on missions we just gamed, played pool, cooked (what's quite funny). We never really did undercover missions as only the agents who were here long enough were allowed to do that. All we did was just kill the target and go away. People covered for us and we didn't have to worry about being recognized. The only people who could recognize us were dead.
So that was my life. Missions, playing games, pool, hot tub, bar. And whatever I did more. We weren't allowed to have contact with others but sometimes we were allowed to go to clubs and meet people there. It Always felt weird to see guys who weren't fellow agents, weirder was to see girls as I spend so much time with David and Tom, that I sometimes forgot that there are millions of girls who are the same age as me. They just don't live the same life.
We were allowed to go out to these fancy clubs where no questions were asked. No ID, nothing. I didn't even have an ID; I didn't exist according to the state. In the beginning I never made contact with anyone in those clubs, I just stayed with David and Tom. But later I learned to ignore the feeling of being watched and just went with it.
I grew over the fact of wanting a boyfriend, something I had wanted in my old life. I was surrounded by boys all the time I didn't want another one near me, besides, it wasn't allowed. And to be honest, what I really needed was a friend. A friend that is a girl. Because I may kill, maybe I act a bit psychotic, but I still am a girl. I needed to talk about girl stuff. Like boys and nail polish and if I was Lucky celebrities if I got a glance of a poster or magazine when I went outside.
Whenever I tried to talk about that with Tom or David, they would just make jokes and laugh at me. Tom would say something like:
"Gurl, I saw the cutest top yesterday. "
And David never let the opportunity to bully me slip:
"Oh, em gee. That's fabulous!"
Dorks. But I loved them.
Want to know at what point I was living with those dorks? When I was cold hearted. When I went on missions with a fire burning inside of me that fed on the hope of ever getting out of there?
I'm going to tell you. We're going to the point I was 19, when I was three years in, and the missions didn't scare me as much anymore.
I had changed the moment I set foot into the agency. And I knew that I would never change back.