Audrey had been feeling desolate these past two weeks. But today was different. she felt different.
She felt a sense of joy as she stood in front of the mirror admiring the smile upon her lips. It was a smile that she hasn't seen in a while.
"Today's the day". She said as she placed her hands on her flat stomach. She found out she was pregnant about three weeks ago. After receiving the news, at first, she was scared. She was only 23, After all. She barely new how to take care of herself, let alone a baby. Then she remembered Patrick and what a baby could mean for them. She had always fantasized about a future with him. She fantasized about Patrick divorcing his wife and leaving his family. They could move to a nice little town far away and start a family of their own. She could be a house wife. Stay home and raise the baby while Patrick is working as a big CEO of some company to provide for her and the baby. She would make friends with other moms like herself so she wouldn't feel so lonely while Patrick is away at work.
She fantasized about the perfect life with the perfect man.
Her smile grew brighter at the thought.
Today was the day her fantasies would become reality.
She turned her body to get a side-view of herself. She imagined a large bump in the place of her flat belly. Her excitement grew at the thought of telling Patrick. She imagined him being happy. He'd be shocked at first but a large smile would slowly appear. He would take her into his arms and hold her. He would kiss her, tell her that he loves her and the baby. They would be happy.
Audrey hadn't realized how long she was she was staring at herself in the mirror until she noticed the birch wood clock on the wall read 8:45pm.
Patrick should be here any minute.
As if on cue, Audrey heard a knock on the door and all of her excitement and joy was replaced by nervousness. she took a deep breath and opened the door.
There he stood. Patrick and all of his 6 foot glory. "Patrick!" She exclaimed, a smile on her face. She stepped to the side to let him in.
"Audrey", Said the man as he embraced the young girl "I missed you".
Audrey had noticed Patrick was wearing the aftershave she got him for his birthday. He had been thinking about her. All of the nerves seemed to disappear as she buried her face in the crook of his neck.
*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
She watched in awe as the man in front of her began to undress. "Isn't that supposed to be my job?" Audrey teased, only half-joking. She leaned forward into a sitting position, revealing more cleavage than necessary. She had missed him in more ways than one.
Patrick chuckled. "Actually", he said as he sat down on the bed beside her. "I was hoping we could take it easy tonight".
"Oh". Audrey felt a little disappointed.
"Is that okay with you?" Patrick asked as he removed his pants.
"Yeah. Of course it is" She lied.
"Good" He sighed, obviously revealed "It's just that i'm tired. All of that traveling and work and-"
"It's fine" She assured. "You don't have to explain yourself. I completely understand." At this point, Audrey just wanted to clear her head. She lied down, Patrick shortly ensued.
They laid there in silence for a while, staring at the ceiling above them. Audrey took a deep breath. She had decided now was the time to tell him.
She turned, now laying on her side, her body facing towards him. He was still staring at the ceiling.
"Patrick". Her voice was soft.
Patrick turned his head to look at the young girl.
She did't exactly know what to say. "Well." she started. She was trying to find right words to tell him but none come to mind.
Patrick was now laying on his side, facing her. Audrey could tell by the look on his face that he was starting to get annoyed. He was always been an impatient person.
She took a deep breath to clear her nerves. "I've been thinking." She continued.
About?" He questioned.
"Us."
"Us?"
Audrey began to elaborate. "More so our future."
Patrick knitted his eyebrows. "Our future?"
"Yes!" She exclaimed. A smile was starting to form. It's finally happening. "Together."
Patrick's expression showed many emotions. None were which she had hoped to see. Her smile quickly diminished.
"Audrey," his expression was choleric. "you knew what you were getting into when we started this".
"I know but-"
"The first day we met, I told you that I was married with children".
"Yeah but-
"I'm not leaving my family for you, Audrey".
At that moment, her heart stopped. The life she fantasized about was gone. It took everything in her to fight back the tears that threatened to escape. She placed her hand on her stomach as if to assure the baby that everything was going to be okay.
"I don't want you to." She lied.
Patrick's expression softened. "Then what do you mean our future?" Almost immediately he noticed Audrey's hand cradling her stomach.
His face went through a range of emotions. None of which calmed Audrey's nerves.
"Please tell me your're not pregnant." His eyes held fear.
She was silent.
"Audrey, I swear to God, if-" He stopped himself. He took a deep breath. "Your're going to have to get-"
She kissed him. She didn't want him to finish that sentence and hurt her even more than he already had. She pulled away and stared at the beautiful man's face. Everything was ruined. Everything she dreamed of was just gone. It was becoming difficult to hold back her tears. She gently placed her hands on his cheek. "I'm not pregnant". Her voice was barely audible but Patrick heard her clearly. The man seemed to relax as he let out a sigh of relief.
"Then what the hell are you talking about?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"Yeah, it's nothing."
"Are you sure?"
"It's not important. Don't worry about it."
She felt a single tear at the corner of her eye and wiped it away as quickly as she could, hoping Patrick didn't notice.
The man rolled onto his back and continued to stare at the ceiling. "If you say so."
The room was quiet for a while until Audrey spoke. "Patrick?"
Patrick turned his head to face her. "Yes, Audrey?"
"Lie to me."
She saw the confusion all over his face. His eyebrows were scrunched together and his mouth was slightly ajar. She began to elaborate. "Tell me that you love me."
The confusion on the man's face was replaced with concern. "Audrey, I-"
"I know you don't love me" she argued, "but right now i'm going to need you to pretend that you do."
"I don't want to hurt her" Said Patrick.
Audrey couldn't help but smile. It was a sad smile but a smile nonetheless. 'You can't hurt me more than you already have'. She thought to herself.
"You won't hurt me." She assured him.
He hesitated. "I love you." He finally said. The words sounded foreign coming from his tongue. Probably because he didn't mean it. But it was still nice to hear him say it.
"say it again." She pleaded. Her voice was as soft as velvet.
"Audrey-" Patrick tried to protest.
"Again." Her voice was stern now, almost demanding.
He gave in. "I love you, Audrey."
"Again."
"I love you."
Maybe if he says enough, he'll actually start to believe it.
"Again."
"I love you"
Patrick pulled Audrey closer towards him. She laid her head on his bare chest.
"Lie to me again." She whispered.
"I love you." He said.
He kissed the top of her head. "I love you, Terry." He said one last time before falling asleep.
It was impossible for Audrey to hold back the tears any longer; so she let them fall as she closed her eyes, desperately trying to forget that the man she loves had called her by his wife's name.