Naomi and Claire took their seats in the back of the music hall. Cedar wood panels wrapped around the circumference of the room, built for acoustics more than the eye's pleasure. The raked seating framed a raised stage. Musicians waited behind a glass door on the left. The audience was restless, twitching infinitely. Naomi saw Val's parents in the front row.
Her chest tightened.
She wondered why she tortured herself like this, while knowing that Val had asked her to wait and wouldn't face her till everything was settled.
She glanced at the grand piano, standing unaccompanied on the stage in all its glory. Lights shined brightly above it, but the rest of the room petered out into obscurity, especially around the far edges were Naomi and Claire watched. The bulbs above their heads failed to illuminate the staircase in any grave detail.
Claire crossed one leg over the other and said, "Still nothing from Val?"
Naomi nodded.
Claire sighed. "Honestly, watching the two of you is exasperating. I didn't take Val to be a coward. I don't know why you put up with her."
"You talk like you aren't her friend," Naomi said dryly.
A quartet of cellos began to set up the stage for their performance. When they were ready, they embarked on a sad journey through song that made Naomi think of Val's kiss, and the emptiness of Val's departure. Many weeks earlier, they had talked for hours after escaping to the porch's roof. They had talked till the sun set and Naomi had cancelled accompanying Claire to the party. Before she had left, Val had asked Naomi to wait for her a hundred times over. And Naomi felt that Val was sincere.
Claire said, "It's because I'm her friend that I can say this. When has she ever talked to us about any of her relationships? What if she isn't mature enough to handle one? How can she abandon you like that? I know she was afraid of how people would react once they found that she was- you know, but you're in the same spot as her. You haven't run."
Naomi said, "It's not entirely the same. I mean, she has her family to think about. Back in Iran, that kind of thing doesn't fly."
Claire replied, "But her mother is Canadian; her mom's values are different. She told me that her mom was fine, they just had to work on Mr. Walsh." Claire stared at the back of the dad's head as if trying to pierce it by mental force alone. "I don't get guys like him. Who are you to say what is and isn't human nature?"
"Some people think they have authority to say that. Some people claim that God doesn't want his people to entertain such vile thoughts. Personally, I think it's fear. Fear of thinking that another man might look at you the same way you look at your wife. But why do you feel fear? Why is it okay for a man to look at a woman that way, but not for a man to look at a man that way?"
Claire said, "As a straight person, I honestly don't mind if a girl finds me attractive, I'd be flattered actually."
"But that's you, and girls tend to be less aggressive."
Claire arched an eyebrow, doubt twisted her lips."What about Delilah?"
"Val could take her in a fight. Besides, Delilah was one person. From my experience, there are girls that whisper nasty things, or glare, or ask the teacher to assign me to a different change room, but they don't hurt me physically. Men tend to be more physically aggressive and more cut-throat about this sort of thing." Naomi thought of how long Val had gone without talking to her. Time dragged on, and their relationship had come to a stand-still. There were no letters, no audio messages, no texts, no secret messages in a foreign language. The two girls existed independently of each other. Naomi felt naked as if Val had covered her in some way she hadn't noticed till Val's exit.
Claire shook her head. "I still don't get it. As a dad, how can you tell your daughter that you'll kick her out if she practices the 'homosexual lifestyle'?"
"I think he wants to protect her," Naomi admitted.
Claire scoffed and said, "Protect her by kicking her out? That's rich. She'll surely be protected then."
They were shushed by the lady in front of them and they murmured an apology. When the lady faced forward, Naomi said, "I felt like him at some point. That being –you know- was gross, and I think, to some degree Val has felt the same way. That being this way was wrong, sinful, a disgrace. This is not about Val's dad as much as it about us and accepting ourselves. If Val wanted to, she could have stood up for herself."
Claire disagreed. "The older a person is, the more set in their ways they are. It might not be possible for Mr. Walsh to change. I think he is serious about abandoning her and that scares her."
"So, contrasting what you said earlier, you don't think she simply ran like a coward?"
"She didn't simply run, but she still ran."
On stage, the quartet finished with a flourish and rose to leave.
Val was called to perform. She entered draped in an impressive white tuxedo, a silver cloth fixed around her waist. Her black hair had a sheen to it, and she had combed it for once. Instead of its usually erratic nature, Val's hair was combed to one side and fell over her right eye. The audience fell silent, watching her take her place and flex her fingers. The she began a soulful melody of woe and heartbreak. It sounded like one of Chopin's pieces that Naomi had heard her practice on occasion. Upon finishing the piece, she adjusted the microphone above the piano. Naomi noticed the minuscule tremble of her hand and knew that Val was nervous about the next song.
Val looked into the audience, but Naomi knew Val couldn't really see anything but the bright beams on her face. Val blinked and focused on the ivory keys. Naomi wanted to move closer, comfort Val, but knew that it would be better to stay concealed among the shadows. Val started a song that Naomi knew every word of, Val's fingers captured every note, creating the exact melody. She sang in a voice so powerful and captivating, it swept over the entire room. Naomi had never heard Val sing before, but it was wonderful. It could have been a soundtrack to a movie, or the original audio recording. The Val that sang was different from the one that played soccer. This one was more sensual, more attuned to her feelings and capable of evoking those emotions in others.
The following lines struck Naomi's heart,
"I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets
To carry love, to carry children of our own.
We are still kids, but we're so in love,
Fighting against all odds."
Naomi felt like they were meant for her and they had found its target. Whether Val knew she was there or not, she didn't know. Naomi felt anger. She didn't see Val fighting anything. She saw Val being complacent and faint- hearted, approaching her when she felt like, leaving when she felt like. She remembered the roof and Val's kiss, but it was nothing more than that. A temporary pause on the game they were playing. When it ended, Val went back to playing the role of her father's clone.
This was hard for Naomi too.
She had never been in a romantic relationship with a woman before, much less her best friend whose existence was irreplaceable. She had never let herself feel and act regardless of her insecurities. She had never been the pursuer. Naomi was standing on fragile ground, and Val wouldn't help her understand her own feelings. Val confused her and left her to wait forever. Val wasn't fighting anything. She was too scared, and Naomi had endured enough. Naomi viewed their relationship all too clear. Val controlled whether they ended up together or not. She was the sorry soul held captive by the obscure boundaries of whatever relationship Val had drawn for them.
***
The following Monday, snow covered the sidewalks and roofs. It decorated the branches of pine trees and leaf-less saplings with a layer of pure white icing. It crunched beneath Naomi's boots and fell on soft hair. Her breath was warm against the cotton scarf. She stared up at the brick body of her school and the Canadian flag dancing madly at the edge of the skinny pole. She was no longer an anomaly. People no longer stared and whispered. They treated her like normal as she strode through the hallways after lunch. They smiled. They nodded. It irked Naomi as during the previous month, they were trying to pry information out of her. They wanted to know about Val and gay sex. About who did whom. About how they did it. But even they had come to realize that Val and Naomi's relationship died as soon as it had started. That video and their claimed love was a thing of the past.
They were never seen together.
Naomi wasn't sure if they were even friends anymore. Her shoe drew a line on the tile. It was time to act. She knew Val's schedule and that Val should be in math class. She checked her phone. The text from the receptionist, Mary Ali said, 'You have five minutes.'
That was all Naomi needed.
She pushed on the glass door to the front office. Behind a long counter, a lady waited by one of the three computer screens. Ms. Ali said, "The door's open."
Naomi handed her a fifty-dollar bill and thanked her. The lady pocketed the money and slipped into the nearly deserted hallways as most students were in class. Naomi had told Ms. Ali that she needed access to the school's PA system for something important. The woman had agreed, but not without a bribe. In the other secretaries' absence, the liability would fall to Ms. Ali as the last person in the office, and she would have to come up with some apology, however insincere it may be.
Finally alone, Naomi undertook her task to the best of her ability. She nudged the door open and entered the principal's office. Her heart raced. This was the most daring thing she had done in her enter life. Even Val would be impressed.
Naomi located a microphone in the midst of an avalanche of printed documents. A ribbon-wrapped bunch of rainbow colored peonies withered in a glass container on the window sill. The drapes were drawn to block the dreary outside weather. A small desk lamp illuminated the room while its owner was out.
Naomi took out a crumpled piece of paper from her pocket. If Val wouldn't come to her and wouldn't unblock her number or Claire's- which Naomi had taken to using- she would find a way for Val to hear her. Right on cue, a text from Claire revealed that Val was in class. Exhaling slowly, Naomi adjusted the announcement system according to Ms. Ali's instructions. A loud beep sounded as she sank the button.
She said, "Good afternoon, everyone. There's only one person I need to hear this. And that's you, Val. I know you are listening, so this is what you need to know. Val Walsh, these are the ten things I hate about you. "
"I hate your smirk, that smug look of yours,
I hate that it makes me focus on your lips,
lips that ever so often spit venomous words.
I hate when you wear a cap
That hides your face from those that care,
I hate that people say hurtful things about you
When they don't know you
And will never know you as well as I do.
I hate the way your hair perfectly frames your face
Even when you don't tend to it for half as long as I tend to mine.
I hate the way you walk into a room and everyone stares
As if they have never seen a girl like you.
I hate that you hid your truth for so long,
And I hate that I hurt you first...
I hate that all the boys I've ever dated bear some resemblance to you.
But mostly, I hate that we haven't spoken in so long
And that by the end of this poem, the truth remains that I don't hate you,
Not a smidge, not a touch, not at all."
There was another beep as Naomi ended the message and a single tear slipped down her cheek and into her scarf. These twisted desires, these leaps of fate had such violent ends. A pale- faced principal burst into the room, a pair of security guards at his side. He huffed and panted, sweat breaking out across his forehead as if he had sprinted down the halls. He told her, "You have detention with Mr. Burns, and I don't know what's going on between you and Val, but this is very inappropriate. The PA system should not be used in this manner. Do you understand, young lady?"
Naomi said, "Yes, sir."
He motioned for her to leave and said, "I'll be sending an email to your parents."
Naomi nodded. "I'm sorry."
"Go, I need to address the rest of the students before anyone else gets any ideas." He turned to guard on the right. "Find out where the front desk ladies are. This wouldn't have happened if they were doing their jobs."
Naomi bowed her head in apparent repentance though she wasn't sorry, not at all. She did pity whatever Ms. Ali's punishment would be. The lady had gotten her out of countless troubles and Naomi hoped the principal would write it off as a mere accident.
***
To my two amazing readers, I hope you have a great day.
@Ro_Shanie Never lose your positive outlook :)
@Ali_with_an_A Never lose that which makes you you XD
And this is tomorrow's update, love you guys, have a nice week. Next update is Thursday like usual :)