Chapter Thirteen
Angela pulled the drawstrings tight on her small cloth bag and picked it up off her bed. It was late at night and the base was winding down, or at least as much as a front line Quick Response Base did in the middle of a war. It had been a long first day back for the entire squadron, and it had only come to an end thirty minutes ago. With all the paperwork with coming back and handing the squadron back over to Alexander, getting the new pilot set up and teaching her everything she needed to know about their duties on base, and tending to her own Rogue had really tired Angela out. She couldn't sleep just yet though.
The only reason she was forcing herself to stay up later than she wanted to was because of Alex. As hard and as long as Angela's day had been, Alexander's had been more. He had spent the majority of the day inside the cockpit of the Aegis, locked away from the rest of the world as he tried to get it back to the way he liked it. When he finally came out at the end of the day his eyes had been bloodshot and cold, with his shoulders sagging and his hands shaking.
He had been a total wreck and it had crushed Angela to see him like that. And this was the reason she had packed away an extra pair of combats into her little cloth bag and planned to go stay with Alex in his room for the night. She knew it probably wasn't a great idea, but she just didn't care in that moment. She felt that he needed her, and she had promised that she would be there for him no matter what.
However, as she opened up her door and took the first step out into the hallway, it quickly became apparent that her plans had been derailed without her even being aware of it. She found Kimberly standing before her, her hair pulled back into her usual ponytail and a hard and severe look on her tired looking face, with her arms crossed over her chest.
“K... Kim!” Angela exclaimed loudly, shocked to find someone standing so c lose to her door that late at night. However, now that she thought about it, she really should have seen this coming.
“Baker. Is everything alright?” the older woman asked, her voice just as severe as her expression.
“Yeah... it's fine. I was uh, well I was just going to—”
“Oh, I know exactly where you were going. That's the reason I am here right now. Can we speak privately, in your room?” Kimberly now asked and Angela nodded even though she really didn't like the idea. She was too scared to say that out loud though; especially after the thrashing she had received from Kim earlier in the day.
The two of them walked into her small room and Angela let her bag drop back onto her bed. Kimberly closed the door behind them and turned to face her, an even more savage look on her face as Angela came to realize that she was now trapped. It really didn't look good and Angela swallowed hard, her hands shaking slightly in fear.
“Before I begin, I want to us to come to an agreement first. Until I leave this room the two of us are are just regular people. No military formality, no protocols, and the fact that I am your superior officer does not exist until I walk out your door. Is that something you can agree to?” Kimberly asked and Angela noticed the growl hiding just behind her words.
However, she nodded in agreement. She really didn't know what was going to happen, but she figured that she would rather the two of them just be the friends they were supposed to be, and not a Captain and her Lieutenant. That thought was quickly crushed though, and as soon as Angela had nodded she was sent reeling by a hard and painful slap right across her cheek as Kimberly lashed out at her with a rage that she had not been expecting.
“HOW DARE YOU!” the woman roared and Angela looked back towards her now, cradling her sore and red cheek in her hand as a few tears began to well up in her eyes.
Angela was absolutely stunned and for a moment all she could do was stare at Kimberly as a tear rolled down her cheek and touched her lips. “W... what was that for?” she then asked as she started to come back from what had just happened to her.
“What do you think it was for?! How dare you do what you did and then question why I smacked you! You disgust me!”
Kimberly once more raised her hand into the air, but this time Angela flinched and stepped back away from her. A flicker of regret flashed across Kim's face and she let her hand drop back to her side a moment later. However, that brief look of pain and regret washed away a second later and her eyes once more hardened and narrowed at Angela as she stood with her hands up in front of her face. The only thing was that Angela had no idea what was going on. She didn't understand anything.
“I... I don't know why you're yelling at me! Why are you mad at me? What did I do to you?”
“Don't give me that bullshit! You know exactly what you did! For Christ's sake, Baker, I just caught you red handed and you're still going to sit there and tell me you don't know what you did wrong! You're even more pathetic than I thought! I regret not stopping this when I had the chance!”
Caught me red handed? Angela thought to herself, a second before it all clicked into the place and she couldn't help but gasp in realization.
“This is all about me and Alex?” she questioned and took the sudden tensing of Kimberly's muscles as her answer. “Why are you so mad about that? It doesn't... it doesn't make any sense. Unless... no! That can't be it! Alex told me about how you offered to marry him if he had chosen to leave the military, to make sure he got your benefits. He told me that it was only so you could look after him, and I believed it! But this... all of this right now... It's really making me start to wonder. Kim... do you actually love Alexander?”
“Of course I love him!” Kimberly answered immediately, but quickly continued. “He's like my little brother; nothing more and nothing less! There isn't a single thing I wouldn't do for him! Unlike you, who perverted his misplaced affection shown towards you!”
“Wait! What did I pervert? Uh, Kim, you do know that he and I are both consenting adults right?”
Whatever Kimberly was doing to stop herself from completely losing control suddenly shattered, and now she had a large and obvious tick under her left eye as her hands balled into tight fists. She glared so evilly at Angela that she was afraid she was going to burst into flames at any moment, and when Kim spoke her voice was low, dangerous, and dripping with pure venom that stuck Angela's heart and soul savagely.
“What did you just say? Consenting adults? That's not what someone says when they are talking about dating, is it? No! That's what a person says when they are talking about sex!” she seethed and Angela could feel her anger begin to rise around them. “I'm going to ask this once, and once only; and I hope to God for your sake that your answer is a good one! Have you slept with Alexander?”
Despite the serious atmosphere and the fear that was coursing through Angela in that moment, she couldn't help but blush furiously at the question. This only seemed to set Kimberly off even further and she growled so deep and so angrily in her chest that it honestly sounded like Angela was standing in front of a wild animal.
“I... I don't think that's any of your business...” Angela replied sheepishly, forcing the words out of her mouth with all of her strength.
“Oh my God! You did, didn't you?! You slept with him! What the hell is wrong with you? Have you gone completely insane?! He shows you a little bit of affection and you take advantage of him like that?! I never expected that you, of all people, would be capable of something like this! Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kick your ass right now!”
“Whoa, whoa! Wait a minute, Kim!” Angela yelled loudly and once more jumped away from the furious woman before her. “Calm down, please! I still don't know why you're so mad at me! I mean, I can understand that you're a little protective of Alex and all, but I didn't really take advantage of him or anything! Like I said before, we were both consenting!”
“You really don't get it, do you? You have, and still are taking advantage of him! Just take a moment and let that weak mind of yours think about it for a second! Alex, who's barely shown any romantic feelings to anyone, suddenly cozy’s up to you out of the blue. Doesn't that seem off? Doesn't it feel a little too surprising?! But no, you don't even stop to think about it! You just dive in head first and take complete advantage of his weak mental state! And to think, I let it happen because just talking to you provided him a small amount of comfort! But I never thought in a million years that you would do what you've done!”
“What... what do you mean?”
“What do you think I mean? You must have realized it by now; that Alex isn't the same person he used to be! Is he? After he used Eden he hasn't been the same! His fear, his almost complete dependence on you, and the fact that he is showing you so much affection that it's out of character for him is all caused by what Eden did to him! The only reason he even has any feelings for you is because of that stupid machine! Do you honestly think he would have been with you if he had never used Eden? Do you really think he would have any feelings for you? His career in the military and the duty of fighting the UNE that he has because of how and where he was raised were the only things that mattered to him before!”
Angela fell into a stunned silence and sat down on the edge of her bed, her mind reeling at what she had just been told. Kimberly was basically telling her that all of Alexander's feelings towards her weren't his own, but instead brought on by what Eden had done to him almost a year ago. It was absolutely ridiculous, but a small part of Angela's mind didn't seem to be so surprised by the possibility. Maybe deep down she had already thought of that, but had never given it too much power. Maybe she just didn't want to believe it.
However, if what Kim was saying turned out to be true, then everything she was saying of Angela was true as well. If Alex's feelings for her were not his own, then she really had taken advantage of him without even realizing it. The hugging, holding hands, kissing and even worse, the sex, would have been not entirely what he would have wanted. It was a horrible and dark thought, but one she could not shake now. What if she had allowed those things to happen even though Alexander didn't really want them to? What if everything had just been one giant lie created by his shattered mind?
“No...” she breathed a moment later, her own mind already working things over as she struggled to come to terms with what she may have done. Despite how bad everything seemed, and how disgusted at herself she suddenly was, Angela couldn't totally believe it all. It just wasn't right. She had felt Alexander's emotions and passion, and she knew that they couldn't be a complete lie. There was just no way.
“What was that?” Kimberly barked and this time Angela didn't flinch at her harsh and icy tone.
“I said no. You're right though, Alex isn't the same person he used to be; but I don't think that makes everything that he and I did a bad thing. It's been eight months, Kim. Eight months since he was hurt in Japan, and he is still like this now. He was hurt, scared, and he felt alone after Japan, so isn't it normal that he would seek some comfort from someone else? And wouldn't it be normal for that kind of a relationship to grow and become more intimate? I understand what you're trying to say, but I honestly can't see it like that. You know Alex better than I do, so you should realize that even after what had happened to him that he would never let something like that happen if he didn't want it too.”
“He doesn't know what he wants, Baker! That's the point! His emotions have become so twisted and distorted that he doesn't even know what's up or what's down anymore! I don't think you know how serious this really is!”
“No, I... I do know how serious it is. I don't really think I took advantage of him in any way, to be honest. Look, you said it yourself a minute ago, that you would do anything for Alex. I'm no different really. I don't really know how, or even exactly when it happened, but Alex has become very important to me as well. I want him to be safe and happy too, and I would never willingly do something to hurt or deceive him. I've fallen for him, Kimberly.”
Something in what Angela said seemed to strike a chord with Kimberly, and her hard exterior cracked slightly as a bit of concern lit up her suddenly sad eyes. Her tensed body began to relax and she took a step away from where Angela sat on her bed, sighing loudly as she heaved her shoulders and then let them fall. Now a slightly awkward silence filled the space, but Kim didn't seem to like it and she quickly spoke a moment later.
“I'm sorry for yelling at you like that,” Kimberly apologized, her voice still slightly guarded and hurtful though. “I... I'm a little bit over protective of the kid, and I guess I didn't stop to think about how you might actually feel or hear your side of the story. This is probably just as baffling to you as it is to me. However I still can't wrap my mind around it, and I can't say that I support you two being together. Not after everything that has happened to him. And I sure as hell am not okay with you sleeping with him! I mean come on, Angela; why did you go and push it that far? Couldn't you just have been happy with something less adult? Was making out in public with him not exciting enough for you? He's being forced to go public about who he is because you couldn't control yourself!”
“That's enough, Kim!” a loud and British voice suddenly cut through the air, making both Angela and Kimberly jump in surprise. Turning towards the door they found Alex standing just inside it, the small and tired looking puppy in one hand, and his own overnight bag in the other.
“A... Alex... how long have you been there?” Angela breathed now, her heart stopping cold in her chest as she realized he might have overheard everything she had just said about him.
“From the beginning,” he answered softly, then turned his head to regard Kim as a slightly angry look over took his features. “Kim, I appreciate you looking out for me. I really do. You've always been there for me for as long as we've known each other, and I also think of you as a sibling. But that doesn't excuse your actions tonight.”
“Alex, look,” Kim now tried to speak, her voice slightly shaky as she tried to struggle through her shock of finding Alex standing behind her.
“No, Kim, you look. Angela is right: she didn't take advantage of me. If anything it might be the other way around. Our first night in Japan—our first night together—was not her idea. Not entirely. I'm pretty sure I made the first move, and I'm also pretty sure that I took advantage of the situation. Angela was just trying to comfort me, and I pushed things further than I think either of us were expecting.”
“Alex, you don't know what you're saying,” Kim now refuted strongly, some of her earlier emotion returning to her voice as she stared at the young man's face intently.
“I do! Don't insult me by thinking that I haven't thought of every possible angle to this already; because I have. I didn't realize it until recently, but I had already developed feelings for Angie before I got into the cockpit of the Ruka Boga. Back when you had forced me to take my holiday with her in her hometown, on the night that the first Hive landed, there had been a moment out by the lake that had been cut short. It was peaceful, quiet, and even a little romantic. Angela had tried to kiss me then, but we had been interrupted before anything could come of it. The thing is though, I think I learned more about almost kissing her than I would have if it had actually happened. It took me some time, but I have come to realize that I wanted her to kiss me that night.”
Angela fidgeted uncomfortably on her bed and pulled her eyes away from Alexander's as he spoke. She had almost forgotten about their almost kiss back home, even though it had really been the start to this whole crazy ordeal. She never would have guessed that it would have had such a big impact on him though; at least not like that. She had never even really asked him about it.
“But, Alex—” Kimberly tried to say something, but Alexander quickly cut her off and held his hand up for silence.
“Let me finish, please. You were also right, Kim: Eden changed me. Would I have been so eager to get into something with Angie if I hadn't been affected by it? I really don't know. What I do know though, is that it doesn't matter. This is how I am now. This is who I am! Angie gives me something that I haven't had in a very long time; she gives me hope for the future. Shouldn't that be all that matters? On the front lines that's all we really have anymore. And that's why I've decided to go public about being Leviathan. Not because I'm being forced to by the Press having my picture, but because if I can give people hope just by letting them see my face, then who am I to deny them that? It's what Lillian would have done... right?”
Kimberly now took a step closer to Alex, reaching out a hand that wasn't close enough to actually touch him. She held it there for a long moment and then it fall to her side once more, a long and slightly tortured sigh escaping her lips and hissing through the silence. After another long moment she nodded softly, and Alex actually smiled sweetly at her as his eyes lost their dangerous edge.
“You're right... about going public at least. I still don't think you and Baker having a personal relationship is a good idea though. Not when you're still trying to come to terms with what happened to you.”
“I'm sorry, Kim, but I'm not asking for your permission. I'm not that same little kid who had to sleep in your cot so I didn't get attacked by the female pilots anymore. I've grown up, and I hope you can see that. I might be a solider and a pilot, but before all that I'm a person. I love you Kimberly, and I trust your advice above anyone else's, but not in this case. Angela and I are already together, and I would really appreciate it if you didn't corner my girlfriend and accuse her like you just did.”
“Fine...” Kim breathed, but her words were neither soft nor understanding, “I won't do this again. But don't think for a second that I'll be okay with this. I expect both of you to remember where you are and who you are, and I will not tolerate any public displays. Keep it in private! And if I feel that your relationship is causing distractions or interfering with your duties, then I won't hesitate to transfer one of you to another outfit! Is that understood?”
Alexander nodded quickly and then Kimberly's eyes fell upon Angela as she stared up at the two of them in stunned silence. She knew exactly what was going on though, and it was very apparent that Kimberly had meant that she would end up being the one transferred to a different unit. On the other hand, Angela knew that what Kim was asking wasn't all that unreasonable. They were a couple, but one that had a commanding officer and his second in command in a combat role. They needed to remain professional and focused at all times, so with that in mind Angela nodded in agreement as well.
“Good. And don't forget that these rooms are for one occupant only! I'll over look it this time, but only because I know you had a rough day, Alex. But after that I don't want to hear or see you in each others room during the night. Now I suggest you both get some rest, because you have a new pilot to get set up and you also have to get ready to return to combat.”
Kimberly moved to the door now, but Alexander cut her off by stepping in front of her. He put the puppy and his bag down and then wrapped his arms around her. At first Kim didn't seem to know what to do, or how to take the sudden and slightly surprising act; and Angela couldn't really blame her. This was the new side of Alexander that was beginning to come out, and before his mishap inside the Ruka Boga something like that probably would have never happened.
After a few awkward and silent moments though, Kimberly returned the hug. They held it for a moment, but then one of them ended it and Kim left the room, closing the door behind her with a slight growl as she realized she was pretty much letting them spend the night together. Although Angela didn't see it as that big of a deal; at least not that night. They really did have a long and hard day ahead of them, and after the day they had already had, Angela was sure that anything intimate was the furthest thing from their minds.
“I'm sorry you had to go through that,” Alex now spoke and his voice was soft and very caring. The puppy had realized that it was free to move around now, and it quickly began to sniff about the room as Alexander picked up his bag and walked slowly to the bed, a slightly sad expression on his face. “I should have realized that Kim would come to the wrong conclusion like that.”
“It's fine. She was just trying to look out for you,” Angela replied and sighed softly, meaning every word she said. She really couldn't fault the older woman on her course of action, not when she thought that Angela had been trying to take advantage of him like that. “I'm... I'm actually surprised that you're here though. I was going to come to your room.”
“Great minds think alike, I suppose. I'll admit though, originally I wasn't going to come here. I thought it would be better to sleep in separate rooms now that we're on base and all. But, after a week of sleeping in the same bed and never really being more than ten feet from each other at all times, it's a little hard to be all the way on the other side of the building. Although, I guess starting tomorrow night I'll have to get used to it.”
Alexander now sat down on the bed next to her and she reached out and grabbed his hand, seeking out his warmth and company as her mind still reeled from everything that had happened and had been said. The puppy noticed the two of them sitting there and he quickly rushed over to them, leaping up onto the bed and sitting across Alex's lap while licking and sniffing at their hands and whining gently. With her free hand, Angela reached out and rubbed his ears as he began to groan and pant slightly at the action.
“I'm sure we can adjust,” she said a moment later. “And you really need to come up with a name for this little guy. We can't just keep calling him 'Puppy' all the time.”
“I know,” Alex groaned, “but it's hard finding something that fits him. I mean, I could just start calling him Spot...”
“No! He doesn't even have any spots, Alex.”
“Then you see what I mean: it's hard! I'll come up with something, it might just take some time. Anyways, how are you doing?”
Angela now fixed Alexander with a slightly shocked look and laughed dryly. “How am I doing? Alex! How are you doing? You were inside the Aegis almost the entire day!”
“I'm fine,” he answered and now Angela clamped down on his hand firmly, getting him to tell her the truth. “No, really, I'm fine. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would have been. That's not to say that it wasn't hard, just that it wasn't that bad. Then again that's probably just because I didn't have a UNE Tank charging at me or I wasn't dodging lasers in the sky. I don't know how I will deal with getting back into that type of environment, but for now I am fine. Just tired.”
“You and me both. Let's get some sleep then,” Angela yawned and Alex laughed gently at her. “Oh, and if the dog craps in here, you'll be the one to clean it up. Understand?”
“Yes, ma'am.”
*Note: I know this is a short chapter, and it really only focuses on the relationship between Alex and Angela, and for that I am sorry. However, I felt that this needed to be explained; primarily Kimberly's attitude. So I figured I would get this out of the way now and then get back into the actual battle and war in the next chapter. Promise.