Wohoo! Chapter 50 means more than half way over! okay, continue now :)
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What? I'm so confused. What would my dad and I's relationship have anything to do with why Niall wanted us to leave? They don't even know each other.
Not only does that not add up, but also the fact that I trust my dad with my everything. How would he, who lives hours away, have anything to do with me in Georgia? And what could be so bad? He's never done one single thing to me or my mom that has been bad in any type of way. None of this makes sense.
"We're very close, why? Niall, what are you getting at?" I crossed my arms again, a scowl setting on my face.
He didn't say anything but rather just pinched the bridge of his nose and glanced down. "How close?" He ignored my questions.
"We tell each other everything."
"Are you sure about that?"
"Niall, where are you going with this?! Why do you suddenly take an interest in my father?"
"Khloe, just answer the damn question!"
"First, I want to know why! I don't need to tell you anything!"
"I hate to say this, Khlo, but maybe he's not the 'so innocent' guy that he makes himself out to be!"
The breath hitched in my throat. "Excuse me?"
"I'm just saying that-"
"No, Niall! You're not 'just saying' anything! My dad and I have a very open relationship and I am not going to let some guy ruin my head with bullshit!"
"Every one has secrets, Khloe!"
"No. Not my dad and I! I trust him over any other being on this damn planet. I know that we tell each other everything!"
"What about the part of you having a psychotic asshole of a brother, huh?! What about the fact that he slept with some other woman from America while your mother was at home tucked in bed thinking he was on a business trip? He never mentioned that, did he? Because you surely would have known about Jonah! And if you knew that, I know that you wouldn't have been okay with it! I know that you would have told your mom and you both would have left years ago!"
"W-what?" I had no words. To any of it. What was he talking about? My dad is as loyal as a fucking puppy. He wouldn't have cheated would he?
There's no fucking way.
And how would Niall have found out? They don't know each other. Niall knows nothing of my family, so surely he could be making this up. He has to be! Right?
I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes. I was so far beyond frustrated.
Why couldn't my life just be normal? So much has happened, and I'm done. I don't want any part in anything anymore.
"Khlo, I'm-"
"No! You're lying." I backed away as he tried to step closer. "You're lying. How would you know anything about my family? You didn't even know who my dad was! You've never even met them!" My heart felt like he had taken ahold of it and was slowly applying more and more pressure, making it crumble in his hand.
"Of course I knew that your dad was Nicolas. It's called playing dumb, Khloe, because I wasn't expecting this to happen!" His ears were beginning to turn a slight shade of pink. I couldn't tell if it was from the cold or from the anger inside him.
"So you were lying? Is that all you do, Niall? Lie?"
"Khloe, I'm not lying! Just please hear me out!"
"Niall you have five minutes before I take my stuff and walk out."
"And where are you going to go? Incase you've kind of forgotten, you're on the other side of the damn planet!"
"It's called buying ticket home, Niall! I don't want any part in this or whatever you're doing. Five minutes!"
"Fine, fuck!" He let out a breath, turning. I watched in anger as he almost punched the stone of the house. Thankful though, that he didn't because that would just make this situation worse.
I followed him into the house, quietly walking past Annie who sat with a cup of coffee and a book.
Surely she had heard us arguing outside seconds ago, along with the neighbors, but I thank the heavens that she has the decency to at least stay within her boundaries and mind her own business, unlike some of the girls back on campus.
I began to feel embarrassed with our screaming match as she glanced to us and gave me a saddened expression.
I quickly looked back to Niall as I followed him up the stairs and into our bedroom. I sat on the bed and looked to my hands while Niall shut the door and made his way over to me.
"I want you to tell me everything. What you know, how you know, who my supposed brother is... I want it all and don't leave out any details." I spoke first, just wanting to get this over with.
Niall let out a sigh and ran his hand through his hair. He better not be creating lies at the moment, because I will walk out.
"Niall, I'm waiting."
"Why? Why does this all matter, Khloe? Why can't you just trust and believe me?"
"Maybe because I'm confused as hell, Niall! You're making no sense! How the hell am I supposed to trust someone who lies to me?
He sighed again and stood up. He walked over to his back pack and placed it over his shoulders before turning to me.
"I'm not lying!"
"And how do I know that?! You won't even take five minutes to explain!"
"Fuck you, Khloe. I'm leaving and when I return, you better be in that fucking bed!"
"No. Where the hell are you going?"
"It doesn't matter. I'd probably be lying if I told you anyways!" he turned around and whipped open the door before slamming it behind him. It rattled the walls and shook the wood flooring.
I let out a frustrated scream while pulling on my hair and fell back onto the bed. I don't understand why this has to be so confusing!
I felt the tears start to build up behind my mask and slowly, one by one, I let them fall.
I don't know how long he was gone for. Hours and hours though. I didn't go downstairs at all during that time, but rather just sat in bed, curled into the blankets, watching Netflix on my phone. I didn't feel like talking to Annie, even when she came up to ask if I was okay or wanted to talk or needed anything. Instead, I would just shake my head and she would give a slight nod and close the door.
It was a bit after eleven when I heard the bedroom door close.
I had changed into pajamas, but I was still curled into the sheets. I had watched a total of five movies and was currently on my sixth, although I wasn't really paying attention, but rather wondering where Niall had gone to and what he was doing.
I glanced up to see him with a giant stack of papers in his hand. They were stapled together in the corner so that way he couldn't lose any or disrupt the order. Giving a pained expression, he threw them on my lap and turned to walk out.
"Niall, I-"
"Just read it. And make sure you read all of it." His voice was hoarse and dry.
I slowly shut my mouth and nodded, turning to the papers as he shut the door. I turned the light on that sat on the small desk, allowing me to see the words that were surprisingly spread neatly across the pages.
I don't really know how to start, so let me just start with myself. And I want you to please read the WHOLE thing before you come try and talk with me. Please.
I was born on September 13, 1993 to Alissa and Dan Strolley. My mom at the time was only sixteen. She apparently couldn't handle the mentality of being a parent, so she did the rational thing of giving me to my godparents, the Horan's. They were friends with Alyssa's parents. I grew up with them my whole life. They had already birthed Annie and Greg, so what was one more?
I don't remember my dad before he started drinking, but I guess he used to be really happy. He used to love us like a real family.
When I was five, my parents started to fall out of love. My dad would stay at his office longer than usual and when he'd get home he'd take a shower and go to bed. This is when he started to drink.
He started with only having a couple beers, but with in that year it accumulated greatly. My mom would always make sure that us kids were in bed before he got home. It was like that for a few months.
Around July of that year my dad had hit my mom for the first time. I remember trying to sleep but they were arguing and I couldn't help but to listen. I didn't want anything to happen, however they deceived me. I had walked out into the kitchen, hiding behind the counter. My mom had swore at him and I watched as his hand came into contact with her cheek. She fell to the floor, sliding into the cupboards.
I was stupid enough to run out in between them. My mom looked like she had seen a ghost, and my dad just smiled and walked away.
I don't remember much from that night, but that memory still haunts me. Just like the ones of her being dragged by her hair.
I'm scared that I'll screw up and do that to a woman I care for with out even thinking.
There was a small dried, wet spot on the paper. I ran my thumb across it. I hadn't even realized that I was crying also, until I licked the salty residue off my lips.
When I was six, the hitting and beating became more constant. My mom would tuck me into bed and run her frail fingers lightly over my face. She'd go from my hair to my eyes, down my nose and lips to my jaw. Like she was trying to remember me in every possible way. Trying to burn my image into her skin and mind.
She was pretty scrawny if I'm honest. Her blonde hair looked like a thick winter coat over her head. Every time I hugged her, it'd feel as if she'd break. This is when she started telling me about looking to the moon. About how just like the moon will always be there, so will she.
I remember him talking about how she said to look to the moon and she'd be here, but she never was. He told me that the night I caught him drinking and crying in his room at one of the frat parties. I finally know who he's talking about. It's his mom.
November 6, 1999 was the last night that I she had tucked me in and slept with me.
"I'll always be here with you, no matter what. When you look in that sky late at night, always look to the moon and know that I'm watching over you. I promise, Niall."
She would tell me that every night. She would hold my tiny hand in hers and press light, feathery kisses onto each knuckle, sometimes leaving behind a small trace of blood. Her dry lips would then press to my forehead, and I knew then that it was time to close my eyes and forget the chain of events that had happened today because tomorrow was a new day. A new start.
That was the last night that she had told me those words, and the last night that I had felt her lips burn into my skin. In the same way she would run her fingers over my face to remember me, I remembered her by that burn on my forehead. The feel of her lips were branded there.
I woke up the next morning and she was still asleep. At least that's what I was probably thinking. When Greg and Annie carried me out of my room and had us go over to the neighbors is when I realized that she wasn't ever going to wake up. I remember seeing the moon still out, big and bright, that morning as she was carried by a stretcher out of the house.
I remember us all sitting in my neighbors living room, crying in a huddled circle. My dad really had beaten her dead.
The memory of myself laying with her, kissing her dried- blood hands as she did mine is so real, Khlo. It's like I'm still sitting there with her. The moon haunts my every thought, also. I can't even barely stand to look at it anymore, that's why I usually have my blinds pulled in my room. Because in that window is where it shines the brightest.
There were more water marks on the paper, and mine were only adding to it.
After my mom died, my dad had turned his violence towards me. He'd always use the 'you're not really my kid' card. Do you know how unwanted that makes a six year old feel? I already had no family besides Greg and Annie, and that killed me.
Annie had moved out when I was eight. She was sent to a boarding school in London. She continued to do her schooling there until she was sent to college in Georgia. I never really grew up around girls. I was sent to an all boys school, along with Greg. That's the main reason I've never seen a girl as anything other than a sex toy because that's what my dad had taught me. He never really taught me about love or how to treat people with respect.
When I was twelve, I told you how I had ran away. The men were burly guys who dealt with drugs. They lived in one of the allies near by. There, I had my first drink. I smoked weed for the first time. I did a lot of shit at such a young age. They would have prostitutes over every day. I didn't do anything with them, but I watched a lot of shit.
I was fourteen when I lost my virginity. You'll probably hate me for this, and I don't blame you because I hate myself. The woman was our maid, probably early twenties. I was crying in my room and she came in. I'll spare you details because I personally don't want to write them and I know that you don't want to hear them.
I was seventeen when I met Harry. Gemma and my sister lived in the same dorm together. My dad had took off for a week, leaving me with nothing. Greg and Annie were both in America in college. So, I bought a plane ticket and took off. I thank God that I did, too. I never went back, either. Harry and I got an apartment right off the main street. That's how I met Seth too. He was living there with his Brothers, Garrett and Jack.
My dad called and called. I just ignored him and continued my life. Greg was a part of the frat, so even though I was a minor, he still let us come over and party. There I started doing a lot of shit. Sleeping around, drinking, drugs. Harry too. It was my way of proving to my dad that I was in control of my own life, however it wasn't really the best way.
I read more and more for hours. Letting all of his words sink in. All of his past. I was crying and my heart was beating fast. Once in a while I'd get mad, but there was nothing I could do about it.
I was mad at his dad for ruining this lovely boy. I was mad at him for beating their family. I was mad at him for taking an innocent child and just completely fucking up his life.
I was mad at Niall for his actions. I was mad at him for handling it in the wrong way. I was feeling for him so badly. I never knew how bad of a life Niall had. I never realized that there was so much more than what Niall was underlying. I couldn't wrap my head around it.
Now, when I tell you this, I don't want you to get mad. I want you to just keep reading. Please.
The year that I turned nineteen was my first year at UGA. I was a freshman. Annie and Greg were both working on their masters degree. Greg and I were pretty much known as the brothers who slept around, but Annie... Annie had the good reputation. She had the good grades, the hot boyfriend, the friends. She had everything.
Unlike us, Greg and I, she was loyal.
My second year (last year), I had been over at Annie's for lunch. I had been talking to her about my dad. He had gotten ahold of me and was going to have me sent home if I continued to do what I was (drugs and all).
I had went to Annie for advice because I didn't want to go back because I knew what he'd have happen. He's a very powerful man.
We were talking and somehow we ended up on the topic of her boyfriend. I'd only met him once, and I didn't really like him, but there wasn't anything I could really do. Annie said that he was nice and loving. He cared for her.
His name was Jonah Henson. He had taken his mother's last name after his father left him. His dad was originally a writer from London, but he'd come to Seattle, Washington to talk to his publisher about his books. During his time there, he'd stay at their house and it'd be like a normal family.
When Jonah was three, his dad stopped coming around. Don't be mad, but that's because your mom became pregnant with you. Nicolas wanted the best for you so he dropped his affair and began to raise you.
That day that I was with Annie, I had been in the restroom when I heard a bunch of commotion. I walked out to see Annie pressed against a wall, naked. Jonah had her pinned with his body and he was working on removing his pants.
I was sat in a hallway, so you couldn't really see me. I tried to move, I really did, but it was as if my feet were five hundred pound weights. I had finally composed myself and pulled him off of her. I gave a few punches to him, but nothing really extreme.
I had dragged him outside of the building, pushing him against a wall. People had started to watch, but that was the last thing on my mind. He had my sister naked, held against the wall. That was the only image in my head as I punched him and smashed his head into the bricks.
Khloe, that's why I was so upset when I heard about Luke. Sure, Luke didn't fully succeed, but that doesn't matter. I couldn't stand to have the only two women in my life that I do care for taken advantage of. I couldn't live with that on top of what has happened in my life.
That was the worse fight I had ever gotten into. There was blood... everywhere. People surrounded us, yelling and screaming and cheering. But I didn't care. I was going to kill him, Khloe. I'm thankful that Mrs. Faye had been walking by and had caught me.
Just like I'm thankful that Luke didn't fight back. Khloe, I know that I did something that you asked me not to, and I'm sorry. I did beat Luke's ass, but just as I was about to take another throw, your face came to mind. I didn't want to hurt you and I knew that you would be. You'd be hurt because no matter what kind of harm he did to you, you'd still just want the best because that's the kind of person you are.
I thank God every night that you were tossed into my life. I thank God that I showed up at the party when I did. You have changed me so much Khlo, and you didn't even realize, hell, I didn't even realize. I know that because you have showed up in my mind every time I have been in a fight since I've met you. If you didn't, Luke would probably still be here and I'd be back in Ireland with an abusive father.
Yes, after that fight with Jonah, I did get expelled. My dad did have to pay for me to come back. But the only reason he did that was so it would look good for him at work. No parent as successful as him, wants a delinquent son who sleeps with every girl under the sun.
My dad is a selfish dick, but I guess I know where I get it from now.
I'm sorry I brought your dad I to this. I didn't mean to turn you against him, but the reason I had you leave is because Jonah is back at the campus. There can only be two people who he's looking for. He doesn't know anyone else there. So either he's back for me, or he knows about you. And the honest truth is that I don't want him knowing about you. It's only been a year and I don't know what he is capable of. Either way it would have gotten me in trouble because I don't want him laying a hand on you.
Harry and Gemma know along with Liam and Louis. Harry is trying to get rid of him while we are gone. He said it would be best to get you out of the city. That's why everything was taken care of.
When you brought up Ireland, I took it as an escape. I wasn't planning on you catching on, but please know that this is the full truth. I was never lying to you. I would never lie to you.
I'm sorry that I have put you through so much shit. I saw you that first night and since then, I couldn't let go. And I'm so glad I didn't because I get to wake up with the most beautiful girl by my side rather than some slut.
I cringed at the thought, but still managed to smile through my tears.
You've changed me for the better Khloe, and I can't thank you enough for that.
I folded the papers together, the best that I could and sat up. I shook my hands and wiped the tears away from my eyes. Glancing to my phone that read it was almost three, I stood up and placed the two hundred and some papers into my suit case.
I quickly redid my braid, and shook my head, letting the information process.
Wow. Just... wow.
I quietly made my way down the stairs and over to the couch where Niall sat. His eyes never once left the television that was playing some infomercial.
"We need to talk." I whispered after a few long minutes.
Niall turned the t.v. off before taking a drink from his coffee and turning to me. I slowly reached out for the cup and he set it carefully into my hands. I took a small sip, feeling the warm liquid slide down my throat, coating me in a heated blanket.
The room was dark, but even then, I could see the distant, pained look in Niall's eyes.
"Can we go upstairs, please?" Niall nodded and set the glass down before he followed behind me. I lead the way to our bedroom and sat on the bed, where he soon joined me. He striped from his clothes, all but his boxer- briefs, and slid under the blankets, laying on his back.
I laid down as well, placing my head on his chest. My head slowly bobbed with each breath he took and I smiled as I wrapped my hand around his waist.
"Thank you. For sharing all of that with me. I know it's hard, but I'm always here to talk." I whispered, placing a kiss to his chest.
"I'm sorry." he whispered back. He slid his arm under my side and wrapped it around my back, pulling me closer to him.
"We still need to talk, though. Figure some stuff out."
He nodded and kissed the top of my head. "Get some rest first, Khlo. We'll talk in the morning." I nodded and leant up to leave a soft kiss on his lips.
"Night, Niall."
"Goodnight, Khlo."
I smiled and snuggled in closer to him. And for the first time ever, I felt him snuggle back, tangling our legs together as his other arm also wrapped protectively around me, pulling me in.
Eeeek! Aren't they so cute!
And what do you think about Niall's letter? I hate to see sad Niall :(
Hope you guys liked it.
Love you! Xx