He shook me awake when he decided to leave. The table had been pulled aside, allowing him to get out in a more dignified manner than I had got in. I followed him outside, hurrying in his steps across the yard. The rain had stopped but the wind blew relentlessly, and while his cloak sheltered him, I was barely protected by the thin wool of my dress.
We reached the longhouse and he pushed me into the bedroom, locking the door behind us.
I gazed at him uneasily, wondering what to do. My first impulse was to get as far away from him as I could, but I resisted it. It would just annoy him, and then he might hurt me. With every passing instant, I became more nervous. He just stood there, immobile, watching me.
And suddenly he moved. His hands went around my neck, making me jerk in fear. He searched for the clasp of the collar and removed it.
I took a deep breath, chastising myself for my silliness. Why would he strangle me? If he wanted me dead, he just had to leave me in the water earlier.
He got rid of his cloak, while I managed to calm down a little. I raised my head, meeting his eyes. His expression was serious, focused, as if I were a puzzle he planned to solve.
“Come to me.”
Hesitantly, I stepped towards him, until we were almost touching each other. His arms closed around me, hugging me tight, and I stiffened. All my will was aiming at one goal: holding my limbs still, not push him away. My arms were rigid, my fists clenched. Of course, he noticed.
“You are tense, you don’t want this.”
And then, the dam burst. I lost control of my mouth.
“What did you expect, I hate you! Do you think I chose to be here? You took me away by force, only a day ago. I made a promise, and I’m holding it, I’m not fighting you. Take whatever you want from me, and be done with it.”
I braced myself for the beating that was sure to come. Instead, his fingers untied my braid, spreading my hair over my shoulders. Then they went to my cheeks, brushing them free from the tears I didn’t realize were flowing.
“Hush, little dreki. I promise I will be gentle if you behave. I will make you want me.”
I started sobbing uncontrollably, hating myself for my weakness. I buried my head against his chest, ruining the precious silk. He didn’t seem to care. He held me until I stopped, rubbing my back, and handed me a cloth to blow my nose.
“I’m sorry, I…”
Before I could finish my sentence, his lips were on mine, kissing me softly. My eyes widened in surprise. I had never done this. I was at a loss at how to react.
He broke away for an instant, and did it again, invading my mouth.
This time my hands escaped and landed on his chest, grasping the fragile fabric. It felt strange, a good sort of strange. I closed my eyes, letting my other senses take over. He tasted of mead, sweet, it wasn’t unpleasant. His hands ran over my back, his thumbs grazing the sides of my breasts. I shuddered at the sensation. Locking my arms around his neck, I drew him closer. Until my lower belly met his, and I understood what was happening.
Scared, I stumbled backwards and ran to the other side of the bed. He chased me and I jumped on the mattress, going for the door. He caught my ankle and pinned me there, climbed too and leaned on me. I was caged under him and he smiled.
“You lost the game, mouse. Do you yield?”
As I didn’t answer, he kissed me again, moving down to my neck, and back to my ear. Nibbling on it, he repeated:
“Do you yield?”
“Aye”, I sighed, surrendering. I had no fight left in me, I was tired.
“Wise decision,” he muttered, sliding off me.
“Undress,” he added, pulling his kirtle over his head.
Blushing, I knelt and removed my boots and dress. I grabbed the hem of my smock with shaky hands, unable to bring myself to lift it.
Warm fingers traced the soles of my feet, the curve of my calves, the back of my knees…
“Don’t move, I’ll take care of this.”
I stilled, biting my lips.
With light touches, he explored further, pushing my legs apart to reach the inside of my thighs.
By the time he got there, I was shivering, my breath hitching constantly. My whole body was tense, yet this time fear had nothing to do with it.
He chuckled:
“I managed to light your fire, little dreki, or so it seems.”
My face burned with shame.
He knelt behind me, supporting me, before bringing his hand higher, between my legs.
I flinched and let out a cry. His fingers moved slowly, exploring me. What he said about fire must have been true, for I was burning under his touch. I arched against him, unable to control my body.
“You want me now, I can tell.”
There was triumph in his voice, yet he wasn’t mocking me. He moved faster, his other hand fondling my breasts through the thin linen. He bit lightly at the base of my neck and my skin broke in goose bumps.
“Please…”
I didn’t know what I was asking for, for him to cease or continue his sweet torture. He made the decision for me.
Suddenly the flames erupted, engulfing my body while I thrashed against him.
He kissed me and discarded my smock, lowering me on the mattress.
Lying above me, he brought my legs up around his waist and pushed inside cautiously.
I winced and he kissed me again. It was uncomfortable when he moved, though bearable. I was glad when he was done, until I realized that he had left his seed behind.
He drew me against him and covered us, and I prayed God to save me from carrying his child.