The first thing I noticed as I struggled to stand and ignore him at the same time was a wooden fixture dangling from a silver chain around his neck. Dark wood and crudely carved the cross rested against his equally dark shirt, brown like rich soil. Obviously the ignoring part didn’t work out as well as I intended.
A tap to my elbow both saved and startled me, I turned my head to the right and held tightly onto the strap of my backpack. Shawna grinned wide and revealed the smallest gap between her two front teeth, the rest of her small and pearly whites aligned themselves perfectly, “What are you doing tomorrow?”
Beside me the boy/man shuffled papers and gathered notebooks. For the entire forty or so minutes he’d spent in class he had switched from taking abstract notes in one book to taking full blown notes in another. It was wrong of me to spy since I wasn’t supposed to know him but I was just so curious. And it was wrong of me then to continually ignore him as he stood right beside me.
I was just awkward and dramatic.
He hadn’t said anything to me throughout those forty minutes and for that I was thankful. Maybe he had forgotten that he’d seen me? Hopefully that look of recognition in his eyes was due to the fact that he’d seen another girl sporting the same big ass afro puff that I did?
Whatever it was I didn’t want to stay to find out. I just wasn’t right around guys, especially guys I’d made a fool of myself in front of. I was lucky with Austin….well maybe not so lucky. And then the guy before him I happened to trip over in the tenth grade.
Not that I want to date him or anything…
Thoughts like that forced me to come to the undeniable fact that I had a bad habit of lying to myself. As sad as it was there was something about his hazel eyes, long curly hair and bronze colored skin that made me want to linger. Even his scar made me want to stick around, but it hadn’t been that way when I’d first spoke to him.
Maybe because I was itching to run like hell.
To give credit where it’s dude I had to admit that despite his antics against society he was a good looking guy. And he smelled pretty damn good.
Chris all you smell is aftershave and soap…fuck wrong with you?
“Work …” I trailed and looked through her hoping that Hazel eye boy was waiting on me rather than just sorting through his backpack.
What was that tingly feeling? Was it like or was it rebound?
Rebound. You don’t know him.
I bit my lip and nodded, my conscious had a better way of sorting things out and I barely gave her credit. Yes, it’s a woman.
His shuffling continued and my better mind resumed. I reached forward and interlocked my left arm with Shawnas right arm and carried on with the conversation, “but there’s always saturday.”
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“Travis,” Ashly pushed away his peach brown arms with her light brown one, “Why don’t you go away?”
Crunching on an over munched mouth of salad greens and cucumbers I waited for his usal plea. The sandy haired boy with the plump red cheeks, brown eyes and skinny body plopped in the seat beside Ashley. She turned her head to the side, pressed a hand against her cheek to block his view and mouthed something to me and Shawna. Her pixie cut honey blonde hair gave her the look of a pretty boy, much to her dismay whenever we told her and when she threw up her hands at us not comprehending what she had whispered I shrugged. Shawna raised her hands palms up.
It’s not our fault Ashley didn’t know how to mouth words correctly.
“You don’t like white guys. That’s what it is,” Travis grumbled over his hamburger.
I kinda felt sorry for him because even though he was a decent looking guy with one hell of a personality---Ashley still didn’t like him. Whether it was because he was white I wasn’t sure or not.
“Matter of fact,” he took a huge bite out of his hamburger and my stomach grumbled. Not out of disgust even though I should have cringed at the mayonnaise sitting on the corners of his mouth. It was because I’d put myself on a diet for the third time that month and I badly wanted to go in on a hamburger instead of a salad.
Ashley rolled her eyes and I knew it was because whatever he had to say would have something to do with race again.
Travis took his time with what he said next. He swallowed his mouthful and took a few slurps of his soda before he continued in his same southern drawl. Although he’d lived in the city since he was seven we all knew that he was still a country boy at heart. After another slurp and a belch much to our dismay he continued on with a crooked grin, “I aint seen none of yall mess with anybody other 'n black.”
The three of us exchanged the same incredulous look. And what did it say?
“He knows we’re black right?”
Not that that was a good reason to date only black guys, but it just made sense to date your race first right?
“Travis I see a lil stupid leaking out your ears,” I stuffed another mouthful of dry leaves in my mouth and mimicked his accent, “betta ‘ketch that ya ‘ear?”
Ashley rolled her eyes and took a sip of her soda. She concentrated hard on the pattern of the table top as she sucked the fizzy stuff through her straw. I knew what she wanted to say but couldn’t. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings.
All she had known was black guys, from elementary school to middle school that’s all she’d ever been around and it was the same for me. Shawna had went to mixed raced schools before but chose to just date black guys. It was her choice.
But for Ashley….Travis just wasn’t hard enough. He wasn’t the type of guy she went crazy over, regardless of race. She liked roughnecks, assholes and Travis….well he was just too sweet for her.
Not gay…just sweet. In a ‘I wanna follow you around all day and carry your books’ kinda way.
Travis rounded in on me before throwing a sneaky look to my far right and looking back, “And you. I bet you don’t even like any other races either. Hey,” his eyes darted to the side again as his lips continued to spread apart, he leaned forward and attempted to whisper, “ bet you don’t want anybody ‘cept Austin. How’s Nat-Uh-Lee by the way?”
If I could have possessed the ability that David Banner abhorred then I would have jumped across the table and grabbed Travis by his scoop neck tee. But I didn’t. I withered away.
A roll cascaded across the table and smacked Travis across the cheek, his head swiveled to my right. His eyes turned into slits, “The hell?”
Shawna slammed the palms of her hands beside me against the table and got up in his face as much as she could, “Mention either one of them one more time and I’m going to shove my foot so far down your throat that you're going to shit that hamburger you eating right now. Ya hear?”
Ashley tore her mouth away from the straw and twisted up her lips, she crossed her arms and spewed out all the nasty she’d been holding in, “You tell that bitch that you call your friend to sleep with one eye open. And tell that other bitch to keep her legs closed because word on the block is she got gonorrhea.”
I blinked. Blinked again. And then.
I laughed.
Loud. Raucous and indecently all over the place. I held my ribs and pointed at the terrified look on Travis face and the pure rage rolling off of my friends.
Is it bad that I wanted to say “Bet you don’t want a black girl now?”
Now that was my friends in their gutta form. They were ready to cut and they did. Very well.
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“Crystal!”
My neck craned to the right as the boss mans son Andrew spoke through the small space between the Ala cart and the counter in the kitchen. Black haired, young and the spitting image of his father the twenty or so Andrew ushered me on.
“Yes sir?” I asked stepping away from the center of the kitchen where the crew churned up the specials and where Nadia pretended to tie her shoe as she texted her latest beux. Or maybe just one of the many she already had. He rounded the corner, “Booth Two asked specifically for you.”
Booth Two?
“But you put me on dish-washing duty,” I countered.
It really didn’t make sense though, like who the hell says dish washing duty? It was plain to see that the restaurant business wasn’t in the making for young Andrew and I prayed that God that his Dad would come back soon from his trip and save us all. Without him we were a bumbling mass of confusion.
“Never mind that, Booth two and put some pep in your step.”
And he’s gay. Has to be, there’s no hope for grandchildren.
“Alright,” I nodded and felt for the pad of paper and pen in my front apron pockets as I pushed through the swinging door with the other hand. I felt the bulk of both.
Now don’t get me wrong, I had a pretty good idea of who it was but I didn’t want to jinx myself. It’s just not normal for someone to ask for you, it’s just not and the fact that I’d seen ole Hazel Eyes again made me wonder.
So it wasn’t a surprise as I fixed my lips with that same plastic smile and stepped up to the booth right underneath the window across from table four that a man or rather a boy scribbled furiously under a veil of black curls.
This guy is nuts.
Bonkers.
That shit cray…aint it Jay?
“What can I get for you sir?” I turned on my fake peppy voice and held the small pad of paper and tablet up like I’d never ever seen him.
Slowly he raised his head and pushed back a layer of curls that had draped across the front of his face like a curtain. I admit it, I stumbled, I became lost in his eyes and then lost in his skin and boy did I really lose myself in his curls. He was obviously Hispanic but he was a bit browner and…what else?
He smiled.
I waited.
He nodded and crossed his arms as his smile became a grin and he leaned forward like an idiot. As if him and I shared some secret that I was supposed to know right off the bat from his smile.
“Um,” my smile became a blush, I bit my lip and tried to fight back, “can I uh, Can I get you some er water? Or wine maybe…”A chuckle shook his body but I remained strong, “or maybe a soft drink….or beverage?”
And he just laughed. His crucifix moved along with him and the fading light from outside cast one more gleam across his jewelery.
Why is he laughing at me?
A tear pricked at my eye, I swear I couldn’t help it. His unexplained laughter brought up some really painful memories. Playground memories, me wobbling around and being pushed over for being the fattest girl in the fourth grade.
And when I get angry what happens?
“Sir? Maybe you’d rather if someone else served you?” I spoke through gritted teeth.
There was always Nadia. Bitch.
“No, no, I’m sorry,” he bit back another chuckle and smiled broadly, “You’re fine.”
“Then what do you want?” I huffed and focused on the pad of paper in my hand.
“Umm…” My eyes drifted back to him, his large fingers tapped away against the words on his notebook, his eyes focused on something well beyond my view, over my head even. I followed his gaze and when I saw nothing but a painting I turned back.
“Fettuccini…I guess,” he threw his hands up and sighed. Tired maybe?
Ok, I’ve done this long enough.
“Look, I’m not supposed to do this but you would be better off picking something else. The fettuccine is overpriced. Just a tip,” I added while looking over his head. If I didn’t interest him then he didn’t interest me. To add to the affect I yawned. Loudly.
“I could,” the playful tinge of his words made my eyes slide back over to him, instantly they locked with his and I shivered. He bit his lip and then smirked, “You have a bad habit of biting your lip…but anyway. Like I was saying, I could order something else if I had a menu.”
A menu?
What the? But I have one right ….
I don’t.
I was empty handed, once again I’d embarrassed myself in front of him. And what did he do?
He laughed. Again.
“Chill out, I didn’t plan on staying anyway. I just came by to say hey.”
A bit jilted by embarrassing myself once again I spoke before I’d thought through my words, “This is my job you know? I get paid to waitress and I’ve spent the whole of five freaking minutes not doing my job.” I was pissed, I was angry, I seethed, “Why are you here?”
“I told you,” he slid out of the booth slowly, his black V-neck t rippled with him and his curls swung around his face. He slid back the front curls and stood up at his full length. I stepped back, he was obviously much taller than me, “I came to say hey.”
I wasn’t playing about being pissed. He was playing with my job, my fucking JOB. The one that currently paid my cell phone bills, the one that would push me one step forward into college. I had money to spend and money to save and he’d wasted five minutes. As sweet as it was, or whatever it was, it was a threat. If I got caught lolly-gagging with him on the clock then I could have been wrote up. And I reacted like I felt.
“Hi.” I tossed at him and walked away.