Way too early that Monday morning, Hazel woke up and sighed as she felt a body nuzzle closer to hers from behind.
A faint smile pulled at her lips. She liked waking up like this, but her heart was all in a fuss about what would happen when he left. You got addicted to these sorts of things much too easily, and that was with an average guy who was average in bed and average outside of it.
– Nick was anything but average, in every measurement you were to look at him.
Hazel slowly shifted around and felt the arm slumped over her waist tighten when she placed a hand on his chest. She smiled when he rumbled, telling her that he was awake, but just barely. She started twirling her finger around his right nipple, playing with the soft dust of his chest hair until she felt his lips kiss the top of her head.
"Tickles..." He murmured.
"Do you want me to stop?"
His hand came over hers and kept it put when she started to remove it. "No."
Smiling warmly, Hazel leaned in and pressed her lips to his hand. She kissed his fingers, his knuckles, then flipped his hand over and kissed his calloused palm as well. Sometimes she wondered exactly how hard he worked everyday.
"Nick? Can I... can I ask you a question?"
He stirred ever so slightly, but then took her hand and braided his fingers through hers. "Ask me anything, Hazel."
She exhaled at the ease in his voice, the slight gravel of sexual tension grating along it.
"What kind of manufacturing do you do?" She asked, watching their intertwined hands with a thumping heart.
"Toys, mostly," He replied.
"Really?" Hazel lifted her head up and couldn't help but smile. "That's kind of ironic."
"How so?"
"Well, you're pretending to be Santa and you make toys for a living. You could say you're taking the role a bit too seriously."
He laughed at her joke, but it sounded a little strained for some reason. Hazel noticed and frowned. Maybe it had sounded like she was making fun of his job. "I'm sorry, you know I meant that as a positive thing. I like the fact that you volunteer as Santa," She said.
His eyes looked down and found hers. "You don't ever find it... tiresome?"
Hazel shook her head, resolutely. "No, not at all. Nick..." She shifted slowly and untangled her hand from his to place it against his cheek. His five o'clock shadow chafed her palm, but it felt nice as his eyes and body softened at her warm touch. "It's a beautiful job. If you really do it every year, then every year you choose to bring Christmas cheer and happiness to thousands of children. How could one possibly get tired of that?"
His eyes closed and he blew out a long breath that sounded heavy. Hazel leaned in and kissed his nose softly, seeing his lips twitch ever so slightly.
"You make it sound so wonderful and easy," He said, his voice lowering to a rasp. "Some days I just want to quit and forget it all..."
Hazel moved a little closer and stroked his cheekbone. "Nobody's forcing you to do it. It's a sweet job, but if it's making you unhappy..."
"That's the thing," His eyes slowly lifted and found hers. His lips twitched again. "It doesn't make me unhappy. It makes me... lonely. I work all year long, then travel away in the most merry of seasons, and every year... it reminds me of how lonely I am. Thousands of kids, yet all of them go home with their families at the end of the day. I've never had that."
Hazel felt her heart beat dangerously. She could feel the ache in his words as he spoke, and her heart wanted to reach out to his. "Have you ever considered... working less? I mean, if it's what you truly want and you say work is what gets in the way of your dating life..."
Nick's lips lifted in a small smile. "I wish it was that easy... but I'm afraid it's more complicated than that. Family is complicated to me."
Oh, Hazel knew all about that. She gave a deep sigh and closed her eyes, settling closer against Nick. He wrapped his arm tighter around her and kissed the top of her head once more.
Right here in this cocoon, they could both forget their hectic lives and the complicated holiday stress they both faced ahead. Here they could pretend there was nothing but the two of them, nestled in warmth and uncomplicated happiness.
But it wasn't all that un-complicated anymore, Hazel's voice of reason silently chimed.
~~~
Later in the afternoon, long after Nick had left for his Santa duty and Hazel had left for work, Hazel was driving back to her sister's place deep in thought. And for once, they weren't circling a certain hot Santa.
With only a week left till Christmas, Hazel was starting to feel the growing discomfort in her stomach. She wanted the evening to go well for her sister and the children of the family, but how well would well go if there was an obese tension in the room?
Hazel hadn't seen her parents since Michael was born, which was almost three months ago. And it had been a short meet; Her parents had stopped by to see the baby at the hospital, just as Hazel had been leaving Camille's room. They had run into each other in the hall and it had been unpleasant to say the least. Her mother and father had been arm in arm and Hazel had silently lowered her head and stepped aside while biting her tongue. Her mother had upturned her nose and walked straight on in while her father had followed behind her, pretending he hadn't even known her. Known his own daughter.
They hadn't spoken a word to each other, but everything had been said anyway.
How was Christmas possibly going to be enjoyable with that much resentment mixing with the smell of turkey?
Hazel sighed and pulled up in the driveway to her sister's. She had promised Camille she would try this year, but as the days grew shorter and shorter apart, as did her desire to keep her promise. It was that exact reason she had taken the turn to her sister's rather than driving straight home after work.
Locking up her car and stepping inside the house with a redundant quick tap on the door, she was greeted by her ever energy-bursting niece.
"Auntie Hazi!"
"Hi, monkey," Hazel smiled brightly and crouched to get her favorite hug in the world. "What's up? What are you wearing?"
Her 4 year old niece was currently dressed in a princess gown and holding a fake foam sword in her hand.
"I'm a warrior princess!" Ashley proudly announced and showed off her growing pearly teeth in a happy grin. "I'm protecting my kingdom!"
"Ooh, from what?"
"The evil dragon!"
Why did Hazel have an idea of who the evil dragon was... "Well then. And where's the dragon right now?"
"In the kitchen, eating lunch!"
"Well, I'll just go into the kitchen and face this evil dragon then," Hazel chuckled and removed her shoes and jacket. Ashley bolted off, sword taking the lead, and ran off into the living room with a war cry. Hazel was certain the dangerous couch monster was going to get what it deserved.
Smiling when she reached the kitchen, Hazel true enough found her sister by the kitchen table with a sandwich made out of ham and cheese. She gave a full-mouthed smile back and quickly wiped her hands and mouth down before getting up to greet her sister with a hug. "I didn't know you were stopping by today!"
"Just thought I'd pop in for a visit," Hazel told, taking a seat across from her sister as they both sat down, her sister resuming her lunch. Right next to her glass of water stood the baby monitor, and by its silence revealed a sleeping baby Michael. In other words, a good day in the Duane-Willings house.
"Alright, so," Camille said, after taking another bite of her sandwich and swallowing it. "Tell me. How did the 'break-up' go? Was he devastated, confused?"
Hazel blushed red and looked away. She hadn't told her sister what had happened yet, because she didn't quite understand it herself. "Actually... we didn't... break up. Technically we were never together to begin with, so I wouldn't call it a break-up."
"But you're not seeing him anymore...?" Camille questioned with a raised brow.
Hazel suddenly found the tips of her fingers very interesting. "Uh..."
"I knew it," Camille laughed. She shook her head and smiled better-knowingly. "You couldn't do it. I knew you were still seeing him. I've barely heard from you and then you show up out of nowhere, looking completely fine. Tell me, did the brown eyes make you change your mind or was it his charms?"
Hazel sighed, resignedly. "All right, fine! Yes, I'm still seeing him, but I don't know why. I told him I wanted to end it and the next thing you know, we're... we..."
Camille slowly opened her mouth. "No way. In public?"
Hazel cupped her face in her hand to hide her red cheeks while her sister laughed hysterically.
"Dear God! You are so naughty," She waved her hand in the air ecstatically, "I bet Santa made sure to give you what you deserve."
If at all possible, Hazel's face turned a shade redder. Her cheeks were boiling and she wouldn't be surprised if steam starting coming off of them. If only her dear sister knew... "You win, alright? I couldn't break up with him. But that's not what I came here to talk to you about, actually. I wanted to talk to you about—"
"Christmas Eve," Camille sighed and wiped her smile off, reluctantly. "I knew you were going to have second thoughts."
Hazel sighed back and folded her hands in her lap. "I'm sorry. I just don't want to—"
"Hazel, it's fine. I never wanted to force you," Camille said and gave a little smile. She reached over and laid a hand over hers and regarded her with a kind look. "I only wanted you to try. If you truly believe you wouldn't be able to do it, then it's fine. I'm not going to force you to sit all night and feel uncomfortable. That's the last thing I want."
Hazel smiled back, relieved. "Thank you."
"I just hate the thought of you sitting all alone at home on Christmas Eve. That's why I wanted to try this year," Camille sighed once more and looked down at the remaining pieces of her grilled cheese sandwich. "Sooner or later, you are going to have to talk this out, and mom and dad obviously won't take the initiative. I'm not saying I support what they did or what they've done to you since, but—"
"I know," Hazel smiled back, giving a sad little look. "I'd never ask you to choose sides. Ashley and Michael should have their grandparents, not be alienated from them over a stupid feud. I just don't want to ruin Christmas for you guys."
Camille shrugged calmly and pushed her plate away. "So what if it gets ruined? It's going to go bad either way. It's bound to. I've put Jim on turkey duty and Ashley's going to be driving me up the wall all evening until she gets to open her presents. If you don't lose it, I will."
Hazel chuckled a little, but then sighed for the last time. She couldn't believe she was doing this. "Alright. I'll keep thinking about it, but don't set a plate for me unless I show up. Deal?"
"Deal," Camille smiled, just as there came a guttural cry over the baby monitor. And on that cue, their lunch was over.
• • •
Not all Christmases are as smooth and shiny and a polished dic—