*Harry's P.O.V.*
A part of me has died. Not a note, not a word from her. I know she ran; but I have no clue as to where or why. Did she give up? Did I let her down? "FUCK!" I yell as I throw her phone across the floor. "What did I do? What happened to you?" I vigorously wipe tears from my face.
"Harry, you need to calm down. She'll make contact when she's ready. Just give her time. Give her space," Holly speaks from the door. Liam and Kaitlyn's eyes show fear and worry.
"No! I let her down!" I yell at them standing up. I shove past them going to the kitchen of my house. I immediately grab a drink from my fridge. The only thing I've really done since she left.
"Harry!" Liam tries to grab my beer. "You can't keep doing this! You can't fucking drink away your problems. Don't forget we're," he motions towards Kaitlyn and himself, "Just as worried about her, you know?! She's our responsibility too!"
"It's different!"
"How is it different?"
"I love her! She's the one I want to spend the rest of my life with!" The three of them look at me shocked. "Okay?!" I start to chug my beer. "I'm scared she's given up."
"I'm sure she didn't give up," Kaitlyn says about to touch me. "Maybe she needs this. Maybe she needs to clear her head, and figure out where to go from here, Harry." She makes contact with my arm and rubs it.
"Like I said, it's easy for you two to say these things, but it's not for me. Louis and Niall are are back with their girls while I have no clue where Colleen is. Zayn is with Perrie, and Liam, you have Kaitlyn right next you. I don't have a clue where to even start looking for her."
"What did her dad say?" Liam asks with a look of remorse.
"He said they had no idea she ran. They thought she was still with us..." I shake my head.
Liam and Kaitlyn leave along with Holly knowing they can't do anything for me. I stare out the window of my London home, the one that Colleen and I finally started sharing, since I'm finally home. All I do is stare and drink. But now, now it's only mine. I watch the sea of people walk through the streets, and the fans trying to get my attention from the front gates of the house.
My phone begins to buzz; I grab it hoping to God it's Colleen. It's not; it's just Twitter. I decide to read a few.
"We love you Harry!"
"Where's Colleen? You and her were perfect!"
"Harry, we're worried about you."
Days ,weeks, months have gone by, yet I've heard nothing. I feel absolutely nothing. I don't know what to do without my baby girl. I'm too scared to contact her, and I can't think of how. Everyone can feel sad for me all they want, but it's not going to make a difference. It's not going to bring Colleen back. After finishing the fifth beer I've had today I storm out of the house grabbing my leather jacket before I slam the front door shut. I drive my Rover out of the driveway hoping everyone gets the fuck out of my way. They do as soon as the see the angered expression on my face. I could care less about the crowd of people in front of me. My thoughts were preoccupied by only one person, and one person alone. The one person I want, but the one who left without saying goodbye. The hurt and the anger rises; taking over my over my heart. I slowly slip into dangerous territories. Partying. And drinking.
As I sit at the bar of the night club my drunken state gets worse and worse. It has been weeks; over a month since I last saw Colleen. "Harry, what they hell are you doing here?" I turn looking through hazy eyes looking at who I assume to be Louis.
"How the hell did you find me?"
"Liam told me what you started, and I tracked your phone," he answers angrily.
"Leave me alone."
"No." Louis grabs my arms.
"Let go of me!"
"No," he says firmly. I wind up my arm and sock Louis in the jaw. He throws a punch right back. "We're leaving." I don't say anything; only follow him solemnly.
Louis helps me into the back of his car. I see that Eleanor is in the front; almost looking as solemn as me. My eyes flutter as the alcohol takes over. The last thing I hear is, "What are we going to do?" from El.
I wake up, not in my room, but the guest bedroom I know all too well to be in Louis and Eleanor's home. My head pounds as I struggle to sit up. "Fuck, what happened to me?"
"You've been getting drunk every night..." I look up to see El in the doorway holding a glass of water and something else in her other hand. "Here," she says walking over to me. She hands me two Tylenol. I look away from her as she sits next to me on the bed. She starts to rub my back, "Harry, you'll find her."
"You don't think she'll do anything stupid do you?"
"Her? No. There's no way," she says matter-of-factly. I sigh deeply.
"Mate, why don't you go after her? Start looking for her?" Louis asks joining us.
"How?"
"You seem to be forgetting that you have, as selfish as this sounds, the money to get the resources to find her."
"But that would be invading her privacy. What if I go there and she hates me for it?"
"You won't know until you look."
Louis's right, I have to find her. She can hate me all she wants, but I need her. It's no longer that wanting feeling; it's a needing feeling. A need that makes my heart ache. My first idea is to call the hotel to see if they'll know where the taxes took Colleen. It's a small hope, but still a hope.
"Hello?" the front desk answers.
"Hi, this is Harry Styles. Of One Direction, so I'm hoping I'll be remembered..." I hesitantly say. "We were there a couple months ago, and I was wondering if the person who was working Wednesday, August fourteenth was there?"
"Yes, Trish is here. I'll go get her for you."
"Thank you!"
A few minutes pass, "This is Trish."
"Hello Trish, I don't know if whoever I just talked to told you, but this is Harry Styles."
"Yes, I was told so. How may I help you?"
"I was wondering if you could track down a taxi service that my girlfriend took that day."
"Her name?"
"Colleen Burke..." I hesitate.
"Just a second." I wait impatiently hoping for some kind of news. "Yes, it was just Yellow Cap services."
"Do you know where they took her?"
"It says Orlando International Airport."
"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" I say.
"You're welcome. Have a nice day."
"You too!"
"What did they say, Harry?" Eleanor asks.
"They said she took a cab to Orlando International Airport..."
"You don't think...?" Louis says hesitantly.
It hits me, "She went home," my eyes widen. "Home home." The other two look at me in shock.
I hop in my Rover, which they brought back for me, and drive to my house. I run through my house frantically throwing random stuff in a suitcase. I have to get to her! She's at the only place she can get away from everything. The only place she escapes from the world. I just hope I'm not too late. Louis meets back up with me to drive me to the airport.
"One flight to JFK?"
"You're lucky; we have one seat left, and it boards in twenty minutes."
"I'll take it!" The woman hands me the ticket after I pay and I rush to the waiting area. Louis and Eleanor stay with me. We keep our hoodies up; hiding ourselves as much as possible. The longest twenty minutes of my life finally pass, but now I have another eight agonizing hours to get to her. Not counting the drive I have to take from JKF; so it's really an eleven hour trip.
"Call us when you get there. When you find her," Eleanor says looking into my eyes placing her hand on my cheek.
"I will," I cry. Colleen, I'm coming for you!
*Twelve hours later*
I'm finally here, and I'm terrified to enter her house. It's almost five in the morning when I vigorously knock on the front door.
"Who the hell is at the door at five in the morning?" I hear her father say through the wall. "Who the he-" he stops mid-sentence. "What do you think you're doing here?"
"Sir..." I stumble. "Mr. Burke," I say shaking. "Please...?"
"You better have a damn good reason why you're just arriving."
"Can I come in?" He steps aside letting me in the warm house.
"What do you have to say for yourself?" Mr. Burke asks after making us coffee.
"I don't have anything to say," I stare at my cup.
"She didn't stop crying for weeks. She used to wake up every night screaming before she got help. She tried running one night," he says sternly.
"I... I know she does... She had for months with me... And-"
"The first night she tried running after waking up from a nightmare, and she still hasn't told us what any of them are about."
I stop moving my legs and shoot my head up to look at him. Tears are on the brim of my eyes. "I am so sorry I haven't been here. I was selfish. I didn't know where to even look for her. I... I couldn't think straight without her around... I had it planned that we would stop here after the tour, and I... I was..."
"You were what, Harry?!" He's the only man other than my own dad that scares me when he's angry.
"I was going to ask your permission if I could marry her..." I look away from him.
I see his hand tighten around his mug from the corner of my eyes. "After all of this... This... Shit. I don't know if I want you to." I knew this was going to happen.
"Please, sir! I can't live without her. I've been going crazy. It only took me this long because I was stupid and was drinking away my problems. It took my friends to make me realize-"
Mr. Burke cuts me off, "But," he says sternly, "All she's been doing is wondering if you still cared for her. She never expected you to show, but I know she hasn't given up." I still won't look at him. "She's my little girl, and if you let anything happen to her, you have to deal with me."
"I know, sir," I say shakily.
"I will allow you to marry her. If she says yes."
"Thank you," I whisper.
"Go get some sleep, son."
"I don't think I could even if I wanted to." Mr. Burke stays with me for a few more hours; around the time Colleen usually wakes up.
The story will get better, I promise!