We'd gotten everything moved to a hollow in the leeward side of the rocks just as evening fell. The dwarf woman Var had set the three new dwarves, her protégées Bofur, Bifur and Bombur, to work gathering wood and cooking dinner. Riki had doctored the lame ox as best he could, and fed the animals.
I'd assigned a pair of dwarves for each watch throughout the night. Riki would take first watch with Nori. Then the fat one-Bombur was his name-would be on second watch, paired with dour, trustworthy Zigur. I'd be taking the third watch with Bofur. Two of the others would be taking the watch after us, and so on. It seemed best to mix the dwarves I trusted with the ones I didn't know yet.
Over Bombur's fairly tasty stew, I learned that the trio had been miners before a cave-in had filled them with the desire to seek new careers. Apparently they were hoping to find a less potentially fatal form of employment. Not a bad idea, except that their new goal was to join the Army of the Iron Hills. I couldn't say as I'd found soldiering to be entirely risk-free, but hated to dampen their enthusiasm so I just wished them good luck.
Their first step toward a new life had been to sign on to carry goods for a pair of unsavory Dunlendings. Of course, that hadn't turned out the way they'd expected.
"None of us had any idea what those Dunlending bastards-begging your pardon, my lady-were up to," Bofur was saying, for about the fiftieth time.
"It's just Var," she said coolly. She looked calm enough, but I got the feeling that this conversation was turning in an uncomfortable direction. "And you don't need to worry about your language, Bofur."
If it had been me, I would have cut off this line of questioning double-quick. After all, she'd just been kidnapped and put through a harrowing few days, and it might be a bit soon to relive that experience. But Var hadn't put her foot down, and it was her call, so I decided not to get involved.
"How did you end up their prisoner?" Ori said. I could see him patting his pockets, as if looking for something to take notes with. "I wouldn't have thought-"
Var's face turned deathly pale, ashy-colored even in the firelight. It was time for me to step in, because this was not going well. We were still in a dangerous part of the world, and we were by no means out of trouble yet. She needed to hold together until we got to Bree.
I said quickly, "It doesn't matter, because it's over now. We're going to get some sleep, and start for Bree tomorrow. Ori, your turn to clean up."
But it was too late. Var had recovered her composure and was smiling at Ori. "Oh, I don't mind. It's natural for him to be curious. I was staying in an inn, The Leaping Stag, when they, um, when they burst in and killed my-"
That's when it hit her. She clapped one hand over her mouth and doubled over. Her sobs sounded like they were being wrenched from deep inside her.
"You little fool," I growled at Ori. I grabbed the small bottle of Aunt Nott's Mead I kept in my kit for emergencies and leapt to Var's side. I uncorked the bottle. "Here, drink this."
Aunt Nott's Mead is pungent stuff. It smells like nothing on Middle-earth, and one good mouthful will knock a strong dwarf flat. Var took a deep sobbing breath as I held the bottle to her lips, and reared back coughing. "Mahal, what is that?"
Tears were streaming from her eyes-a not untypical reaction to Aunt Nott's special brew-and she glared at me, more infuriated than distressed. I took the bottle away. "Feel better now?"
"I am perfectly fine," she said, coughing and wiping her face. "There was no need for concern." Of course that was a lie, but not one I was going to challenge her on. There would be time enough later on for healing. At least, that was how it worked for me. I nodded and stood up, relieved.
Nori, Bombur, and Bofur gathered around her, offering comfort. Farther away, Bifur was grunting softly to himself and waving his hands around, patting the air in soothing strokes.
Ori's eyes were wide with misery. I gripped him by the shoulder. "It's okay. You didn't know. Now get to the cleaning up."
"I'm sorry," he said, breaking into tears.
"You didn't know," I said again. I took a deep breath. "Just don't expect people to talk about the bad stuff when it's fresh in their minds."
"When is it all right to ask?"
I shrugged. "Sometimes, never." At that point, I set him to work, so I could avoid any more questions from our young scholar. What do I know, anyway?
The night settled in. I woke easily when Zigur shook me for third watch, and found that Bofur was already up, smoking a pipe filled with some evil-smelling weed. There wasn't much to do, so we eventually fell into conversation.
"So, you think we're making a mistake, enlisting in the Army?" Bofur asked.
I shrugged. "Soldiers don't have much of a home life."
"Neither do miners," he pointed out. "I'll admit, though, that we hadn't reckoned on being out in the sun so much. We miners are more comfortable underground, where the light's not so bright."
"Well, if the Iron Hills Army marches against the goblins, you'll have the pleasure of fighting them in the dark." I shuddered. Goblins. I hate those filthy creatures.
He smiled that goofy smile of his. "Well, we'll find something worth doing. Cheer up. Maybe we'll all be doing it together."
"Yeah," I said. "That's a cheery thought, all right."
We were quiet for a while after that. The night was undisturbed, and the sky was full of stars, diamond-spangled as the Gimligund deep in the Blue Mountains. For those of you who have never seen this great wonder, it's a giant cavern glowing with crystals. My all-time favorite place. Nothing can equal it anywhere on Middle-earth, but a starry night sky comes close.
Then the woman, Var, began to whimper and moan. Her hands twitched and her feet kicked inside the blanket she was rolled in. She said, "No."
I motioned to Bofur to keep watch, and went over to her. She was asleep, but twitching and muttering. I leaned over to touch her shoulder, but all of a sudden she gasped, thrashed, and sat bolt upright, eyes wide and mouth open. Quickly I clamped one hand over her mouth and wrapped one arm tight around her shoulders.
She came awake, disoriented, fighting me hard and trying to bite. I was expecting it so I just held on tight, saying, "Calm down! It's me. It's Dwalin. You're safe now. You're just having a nightmare."
I kept whispering to her, holding her firm in my arms until she stopped struggling. Then the reaction set in, and she began to weep. Waking up screaming is always embarrassing. So is the crying and so forth, but you just have to hope to Mahal that there's someone around to help you get through it. So she clung to me, both hands grabbing fistfuls of the back of my undershirt, and I rocked her, back and forth, saying whatever came into my head until the trembling stopped.
"Relax, it's all right now," I said softly, patting her back. "Sorry I startled you, but you were about to cause a ruckus. Nightmares take a person like that sometimes."
She groaned. "Oh, Mahal, I didn't yell or anything, did I?"
"No, I got to you in time. I'll keep an eye on you from now on, in case they come back." I stroked her hair a few more times. It was silky and soft.
"Come back? No. Tell me this isn't going to happen again."
"Maybe not," I said with a shrug. "But sometimes they do. In my case, they did."
She pulled back a little to look up at me. "You get nightmares?"
"Not anymore. But I did." I tightened my hold on her a little, and she settled against me again.
"What stopped them?" she said into my chest. She was soft and cushiony, with surprisingly delicate little bones under the tender flesh. Her soft breasts pressed against my chest. It felt good. It felt right.
I sighed. "A friend. I talked it all over with a friend, and then...I could let it go. But he had gone through it with me, he'd been there and he knew what kind of a hell it had been. He really knew. I don't know if it works, just telling someone who wasn't there and doesn't know how it feels."
"He must be a very good friend." She sighed too, and I could feel her tears start up again, soaking my undershirt some more.
"Yes, he is. The best. Whatever he asked of me, I'd do, without question."
I could feel her nodding her head, then she got quiet. I wondered if she would tell me what had happened that night when she got kidnapped, but I didn't want to press her.
And so we sat for several long minutes, locked together in silence. My head was bowed over hers, my cheek almost touching the smooth skin of her forehead. I felt drunk on the sensation of holding her in my arms. Golden tendrils of hair tickled against my mouth. It would only take the tiniest movement to bring my lips into contact with her tempting skin. Just one kiss, very quick, and she might not even know...
Then something changed between us. She stirred and turned, lifting her face to mine as she pressed herself closer against me. Opening her fists, she smoothed her hands against my back, stroking me. She looked into my eyes. Suddenly I could hear my heartbeat thundering in my ears.
"Psst! Dwalin! It's almost time to call the fourth watch. Should I wake the lads?" said Bofur cheerfully.
We jerked apart, the moment shattered. My face flamed with heat. Hers probably was just as red, but I couldn't bring myself to look.
I cleared my throat. "Right. Fourth watch," I muttered, and stood up.