'red for the cancer. red for the wealthy. red for the drink that's mixed with suicide. everything red.'
Ashton stood outside my classroom just waiting for me to finish up taking notes. Once I was done I got up and walked out of the room. Ashton grabbed my waist and kissed me softly. I giggled and kissed him back. "Hey," he said after pulling away. "Hi," I smiled. Ashton held my hand as we walked to my locker.
"Do you want to come to eat lunch with me?" "I eat in the band room Ash," I said softly. "What if Michael is in there though?" "Then he's in there," I shrugged, "You don't have to come." "I'll come," Ashton smiled.
I nodded and opened my locker. I put a couple of my stuff away before grabbing my water bottle. I then closed my locker and walked to the band room. Ashton followed behind me. "You can go hang out with your friends babe," I laughed softly. "I rather be with you though," Ashton smiled and wrapped his arms around my waist.
I giggled quietly and pushed Ashton's hands off of me as we walked into the band room.
"Oh look who it is," I heard someone say. I looked at the person and it was Michael. He was sitting next to Luke. "We can leave," I said quietly. "No, we were just leaving," Michael said and got up. "No it's really fine," I said and grabbed Ashton's hand quickly before walking out of the room.
I moved to the side of the door and just sat down. I pulled my knees up to my chest and hid my face with my hands. "Cal you can't just sit there." I didn't say anything. I just feel like crying. I sighed and got up.
"Calum what are you doing." I just pushed away from Ashton and walked out of the school.
"Hey! Where are you going?" I got in my car and didn't say anything to Ashton.
"Can I come with you? Maybe we can talk about this," Ashton sighed. "No," I mumbled before driving away.
I didn't even know where I was going I just started driving. I soon started to cry so I pulled over. I covered my face with my hands and sobbed. Michael hates me. He doesn't want to see me ever again.
Why the hell am I so stupid? He probably thinks I'm stupid to even go to New York with my dad. I have another year of school why should I even rush college?
He was right about my dad though. He hasn't been for me in forever and he hates the fact that I'm bisexual. What if he makes me turn straight or something? There has to be a catch about moving to New York with him.
I need Michael. He would help me with all of this. But he's not there to tell me to stop being such a girl. He's not here to help me with any of this. He made his point and left. He left me.
He promised he would never leave me but he did. I pushed him away. This is my entire fucking fault. But he promised. I guess promises can be broken but Michael never breaks promises.
Why would he pick to break them now? Out of all those times he could have broken a promise he does it now. I just need Michael right now. Not later but now.
But he's not going to come because I ruined everything. Everything is my fault. I slowly stopped crying and I wiped my tears away.
I sniffled a bit before I grabbed my phone. I had 5 missed calls from Ashton and one from Luke. Ashton didn't leave any voice mails but Luke did. Luke only called 5 minutes ago. I sighed and listened to the voice mail.
"You're such a slut Calum," I can hear giggles in the background which were from Michael. "First you go on a date with me then y-you kiss Michael and now Ashton? Who else? That Tom guy you fucking hate?" I bit my lip as I kept listening. "I'm happy you're fucking leaving. So this is goodbye Calum. Goodbye forever. Fuck you." Then the voicemail ended.
I threw my phone onto the floor and I sobbed loudly. Tears soon started to get on my shirt. I just started to drive home. I couldn't see but I was driving home.
If I get in a car accident who will care? Everyone really does hate me. No one will come to my funeral anyways. Maybe my dad but that's it. Or maybe even Ashton to spit on my dead body.
Michael would draw a penis on my forehead. Then Luke would use the same sharpie Michael used and write slut all over my dead body. And no one would say anything because no one would care. They'd just be happy that I was dead. I would be happy that I was dead.
I'll probably be the cause of my own death. Or someone will kill me because they hate me so much. I pulled into my driveway and I walked inside.
"Calum why are you home," my mum asked. I didn't talk to her; I just walked to my room. I was still crying as I walked into my room. Michael has been in this room. Michael. That's all that went through my mind as I started to tare everything down. I tore down my posters and threw it out the window.
Why the hell did I even like those bands? I grabbed my entire band T-Shirt collection and threw them out of my window and they landed by my poster. "Calum Hood, what are you doing," my mum yelled as she walked into the room. "Getting rid of everything that reminds me of Michael," I said through sobs.
I grabbed a handful of CDs. My mum grabbed them before I could throw them. I looked at my mum and I just hugged her. She hugged me back, "It's okay Calum." I sobbed into my mum's shirt, "I-I don't know what to do mum."
"Well I'm going to get all of those shirts that you threw out your window and wash them. You should maybe buy more posters." "But I'm moving," I sniffled. "No you're not Calum. You're staying here. You have one more year of school and then you can leave," my mum sighed. When I didn't say anything my mum walked out of my room. I sighed and put my CDs back in order.
"Here's 50 dollars. Go buy some posters." I nodded, "Thanks." I walked out of the house and got into my car. Before I drove anywhere I grabbed my now cracked phone and called my dad. "Hey dad."
-*-
"So your not going to New York yet," Ashton, asked. I shook my head, "No." "Where did you go when you left today?" "Home." "Why?" "Because I was done," I sighed. "Done with what," Ashton asked. "Everything," I sighed.
"You want to break up," Ashton asked. "No Ashton!" "Okay," Ashton said quietly. "Are you going to help me put up these posters or not?"
"Do it yourself fag," Ashton said and got off my bed. "Excuse me," I hissed. "You don't talk to me about your fucking feelings! I just feel like you're pushing me away or something!" "I'm not a girl Ashton. I don't talk about my feelings," I said and I bit my lip.
Fag was one of those words that I hate. Whenever someone uses the word I want to punch him or her and when I'm called one I want to cry. "Just talk to me." "No. You need to leave," I said as tears started to form in my eyes.
"Calum I'm sorry." I just nodded and turned around to start to put up my Pierce The Veil poster. I scratched at my wrist while I hung it up. "What are you doing," Ashton asked.
"Putting this poster up." "No. To your wrist," Ashton sighed. "It's itchy," I shrugged. "Calum it's all red it looks like it's about to freaking bleed," Ashton said. "What are you trying to say Ashton," I growled as I got another poster. "You want to cut yourself it seems like." I just shrugged again.
"Calum please stop," Ashton bit his lip. "Can you help me?" Ashton handed me a piece of tape to hang up the poster. "I'm not going to cut myself Ashton okay?" "You promise?" "I-I promise," I stuttered.
"I bought you something," Ashton giggled as he jumped off my bed. I finished putting up my other poster and I sat on my bed. "Why," I asked. Ashton shrugged and got something out of his bag. It was a long box with a small bow on it.
"It's nothing special but yeah," Ashton shrugged as I opened it. It was a necklace with the letter A charm on it. "I have the C," Ashton smiled and showed me the necklace he was wearing. On both of our necklaces was a really small heart charm next to the letter. "It's cute, but I can't take it." "W-What? Why not," Ashton asked. "Because I don't like it when people spend money on me," I shrugged.
Ashton pouted, "Please. You don't even have to wear it." "Fine," I sighed and put the box on my nightstand, "Thank you." "You are very welcome my love," Ashton smiled and kissed me. I slowly kissed back.
Ashton pulled away, "Are you okay?" I shook my head, "L-Luke called me a slut today it's just been bothering me." Ashton got up and walked out of my room so I followed him. "Where are you going," I asked.
"To Luke's house." "He's at Michael's," I sighed. "Then I'm going to Michael's," Ashton said as he got into his car. I got in and he drove away. "Why are you coming," Ashton asked. "For you don't get yourself hurt," I said and kissed Ashton's cheek. "I love you Calum and I'd do anything for you. You know that right?" "Yeah. I know."
"Good," Ashton said as we pulled into Michael's drive way. Ashton and I walked up to the front door and knocked. Michael's mum came to the door. "Hi Mrs. Clifford. Is Michael home," Ashton asked.
"Yes. He's upstairs, why?" "We would like to see him please," Ashton smiled. "Well sure. Come in loves," she smiled and let us in. "Thank you," Ashton smiled again before walking upstairs to Michael's room. "Calum sweetie, Michael has told me that you two got into a fight and that you're leaving?" "I'm not leaving anymore but Michael and I aren't friends anymore," I sighed.
"I'm so sorry love," she frowned, "You guys were so cute together." I slightly smiled, "Thanks Mrs. Clifford." She smiled before walking away. I walked upstairs and Ashton was waiting for me.
"She's nice," he whispered. "I know," I said. Ashton knocked on Michael's door and Luke opened it.
"It's Ashton and Calum," Luke sighed and moved away from the door. Ashton and I walked into Michael's room. "What are you two doing here? Like I hate the both of you and you weren't invited."
"Dating Calum's ex best-friend huh? Very classy Hemmings," Ashton rolled his eyes at Luke. "Were not dating," Luke growled. "Whatever. Calum loved you and now you're calling him a fucking slut! How can you live with yourself?" "Ashton we should just go, it doesn't matter," I said as I started to scratch at my wrist again.
"Listen to your boyfriend Irwin," Michael hissed. "No. I want to understand why you both hate Calum when he has done nothing to you two." Luke and Michael didn't say anything. I soon saw that my wrist was bleeding.
"Ashton please. Can we go?" My wrist was starting to burn. "Not until they say something Cal." I sighed and just let my wrist bleed.
If I pass out from blood loss it's Ashton's fault. "I don't hate Calum. I'm just mad at him because he's leaving." "I-I'm not leaving anymore," I stuttered. Michael smiled wide, "Really?" I just nodded.
I then looked at Luke. "Calum is just a slut," Luke said quietly. It hurt worse to hear him say it in person. "Luke he's not a slut," Michael rolled his eyes. I grabbed Ashton's hand and held onto it tightly. "He went on a date with me then he kissed you Mikey. And now he's dating this ass," Luke sighed. "We kissed because we were fucking high," Michael said.
"Still," Luke shrugged. "I stopped talking to you because you were being a ass Luke." "Ashton did something to you too and you don't even care?" "I do care. But Ashton said sorry." "So did I," Luke almost yelled. I looked away from Luke and looked at Michael. He frowned and shrugged.
Ashton let go of me and looked at Luke, "So you really think Calum is a slut? What else is he Luke?" "I'm not talking to you," Luke growled. "What else is he Luke," Ashton repeated. "He's a lying slut who doesn't deserve to be happy," Luke yelled.
I felt like my heart shattered. Michael walked over to me and hugged me tightly. "He doesn't deserve love in his life and he doesn't deserve to have any fucking friends. Calum Hood is a joke. He's a fucking fake."
"You never really loved me did you," I asked quietly. "I don't know. Did you want me to love you," Luke smirked. "Ashton punch him," Michael said. Ashton pushed Luke down and he hit his head on something before Ashton punched him in the jaw. "Move back to where ever the hell you came from."
"H-How hard do you think you hit his head?" "Pretty hard why?" "He has a brain problem Ashton! If he hits his head hard enough he'll forget everything," I about screamed and looked at Luke.
"Oh shit." "Are we going to go to jail? I can't go to jail," Michael started to panic. "If he wakes up he'll forget everything then right," Ashton asked. I nodded. "Then we can tell the cops that he fell and hit his head."
"But what about his bleeding jaw," I asked. "He hit his jaw on this thing," Ashton said and pointed to something sharp at the side of Michael's bed. "This is fucking horrible guys! We may have killed someone," Michael cried.
"Mikey calm down. He's going to wake up," Ashton said and bit his lip. "How do you know? You're not a fucking doctor! You're just some punk ass weirdo who plays the drums like a badass!" "He's going to be fine Mikey. Just calm down please," I begged.
Michael started to breathe heavily as he started to pace back and forth. "Mikey please," Ashton groaned. "I'm just worried Ash! People with purple hair don't do to well in fucking jail," Michael yelled.
"Be quiet! Do you want your mum to hear us," I hissed. Luke's body soon started to move. "If he's a zombie I'm letting him eat you," Michael said to Ashton. "Why me?" "You have more hair," Michael shrugged. Luke soon sat up and looked at us. "Hey," I said quietly.
"Who the hell are you guys," Luke said and raised his eyebrow.
"Oh shit," I mumbled.
A/N: So I was writing a sequel but no one was reading it so what if I just keep going on this book instead of doing a sequel. Is that cool?