2 Months Later
"Congratulations to Blake and Haley for creating the best project I have seen in years. Your work was extraordinary whereas it seemed like no one else put any effort in and just handed in their rubbish." Mr Parker exclaimed as he stood in the centre of the classroom simply glaring at everyone but Blake and I.
"Sir, mine wasn't too bad-"
"Chris yours looked like a dog ate a chew toy and excreted it out so please do not get me started on your work. I do know for a fact that if Dante had not gone overseas to help out with his father's business than Haley and Blake's project would be even better than it is now." Mr Parker interrupted Chris and soon he just began to give our lectures to students one by one about how poor their quality of work was. However, all that my mind could think of was still Dante.
I could feel tears sweeping up in my eyes as my hands began to shake slightly. Every time I heard his name flashbacks of all our good and bad times came into my head. It was like constant torture knowing that the person you loved could no longer slip their hand into yours or give you small kisses when you feel down.
But what was worse was the fact Jase, Chris, Juli, Charlie, Blake and I couldn't pluck up the courage to tell the school that Dante was no more. We couldn't tell them so we lied to avoid questions about anything that could've happened. Heck, just his name made me want to go dash into my bed and bawl my eyes out.
"Hey, Haley. You okay?" Blake moved his chair closer to mine and wrapped his arm around me to pull me close towards him. Blake had gotten closer to me since the unfortunate event had happened and he would constantly make sure I was fine. I appreciated it so much. "You're crying."
He wiped away a single tear that was running down my face which I hadn't even seemed to notice.
"Haley, I'm so sorry. I should've tried to be there more for him and I should've fought alongside him instead of fending the guards by the gates. Instead of him it should've been me since the pair of you guys had a future together while I was a complete wreck-"
"Blake, shut up, please. Look, no one deserves to die but you can't blame yourself for this or anyone for that matter because deep down I know he could still be alive out there. Blake I miss him so much it hurts to even say his name but more than me it hurts you because he was like your brother so instead of wishing you had lost your life show that he meant a lot to you by appreciating everything he had done for us." I didn't even know what I was babbling on for long because soon the waterworks started and I was crying a stream of tears.
All I could envision was me holding Dante in my arms as he was bled and became weaker. All I could see was Dante still trying to look strong for me in his last moments. All I could see was Dante telling me he loved me before he went.
"Excuse me, I need to go." I cried as I quickly got up from my chair and began to make my way to the door. " I need some space and some alone time."
"Just don't blame yourself either." Blake muttered as he looked down and closed his eyes almost as though he looked like he was about to burst into tears any moment now.
I ran out of the classroom only to bump into Charlie who was standing with a girl by his side only for me to realise it was that slut Brittany moving on to her next 'boy toy'.
"I'm so sorry, Dante." I whispered before I cried even harder as the thought of a couple being in front of me. I couldn't take this pain anymore I needed to stop it and for good. I dropped to the floor and began to let out all the tears I had been holding back for these past two months.
"Watch where you're going loser!" Brittany scowled before me. Usually if I wasn't this down I would've given her a piece of my mind but quite frankly she didn't deserve any of my time.
"Loser? Get out of my face and never come near me again. That's my best friend you're talking to, so get out of here." Charlie spat at her feeling like it was his job to protect me.
Her jaw dropped and she looked like she had seen a ghost but she stormed off nonetheless.
Charlie sat down beside me before wrapping his arms around me and hugging me close. His body was warm and comforting so I threw my arms around him and began to cry into his chest.
"Why didn't he come into the car when I told him to? He could've been here with me-"
"Teddy, I'm going to stop you right there. You don't even realize what happened has happened and there was no way of stopping it. If we could all change back time we would and we wouldn't even think about it for a second because all the others would've done anything to get him back and to make you smile once more. You're so beautiful and amazing you don't even know it. You're not keeping your promise to Dante that you made and he'd probably be devastated that you broke it." Charlie rubbed my back and clung on to his shirt, my breathing becoming rapid as I thought more and more about Dante.
"But I don't want to love anyone else-"
"Teddy, you need to let him go. He's gone and won't be coming back but if you're still hurting then when you go home just think of the good times and hold on to them. Hold on to them and whenever you feel down remember those who cheer you up. He wouldn't want you to be upset and depressed he'd want the annoying Haley that was feisty, cunning and funny back. We all want that Haley back." I felt Charlie let out a deep sigh as he let go off me and so I did the same. He looked into my eyes and cupped my face with his hand. "Smile, please... For me."
He wiped away my tears and I took a deep breath before trying to compose myself and thought of Dante's and my happy moments (even though all of them were) and smiled slightly. It was first smile since then.
"There you go, you're looking even more beautiful now." He slipping his hands into mine as he helped me get up and stand on my feet once more. Just as Charlie was about to say something we saw a guy walk up to us and so Charlie's hands tightened around mine while I tried to loosen his grip and free my hands.
"Hey Haley, can I talk to you ... alone?" Connor smiled and frowned when he looked down and saw my hand were interlocked with Charlie's. He probably thought Charlie and I were having some sort of moment or thing but boy he could not been any wrong.
"Whatever you have to say you can say infront of both of us!" Charlie exclaimed and instantly I shook my hands free using a lot of force and glared into Charlie's eyes. I didn't know why he was acting so strange and peculiar but it wasn't very comforting now.
"Charlie leave the poor guy alone." I turned to face Connor properly and smiled at him. He was the one that always made sure I smiled in my art classes and he had also been a huge support in school. "Sure what is it, Connor?"
"Well I was thinking about it and realized Spring Formal is coming up and I really wanted to go with a girl that I knew would make it an amazing night. So Haley will you do the honour of making your art buddy smile by accompanying him to Spring Formal?"
"Awh, Connor." I could feel tears about to be made and quickly took small breaths hoping no one would notice. He was so sweet and such a nice guy but I had planned to stay home and watch movies with Jase as I would feel extremely uncomfortable being surrounded by couples and people who love each other while I lost mine. "Connor, I would love to go with you but-"
"She can't, she's already been asked like by half the guys in the school which she turned down since she is going with me so you can ask another girl." Charlie smiled before wrapping his arm around me. A small frown appeared on Connor's face but he shook it off.
"Its ok, I should've know a girl as amazing as yourself would've already been asked by a lot of guys." He was about to walk off but I quickly ran up to him and hugged him throwing my arms around him.
"I'm sorry. Truth is I don't want to go because everyone will be in couples and act all lovey dovey and I don't want to be in that sort of atmosphere." I had told him the truth whereas everyone else in the school had thought Dante and I had broken up because long distance wasn't working. "Charlie here was just being a twat."
"Thanks, I appreciate the truth." Connor hugged back and as we released he smiled. He was about to say something when all of a sudden the bell rang and all students began to pile out of their classrooms and make their way to their next lesson.
Just as I turned around I thought I saw him. He looked just like him only he looked more mysterious in his leather jacket. It was Dante walking in the corridors staring right back at me. Once he realized that I was looking at him not and not some fool who was beside him he quickly turned and began to make an escape from me.
"WAIT!" I screamed loudly so he could hear me over all this noise. I began to barge past people and in return earn rude and very crude remarks but right now I didn't give a damn. I could see him as he tried to make a left but I ran a little faster because I could slip myself better thought the crowd than he did.
"Dante!" I managed to grab his jacket and so I yanked it and when he turned around I felt my heart drop. This wasn't possible I saw his face! It had to have been him!
"Urm, I don't know why you're clinging to my jacket but if you like me that much you could've just said." The guy before winked and tried to flirt but instead I felt repulsed.
He looked nothing like Dante, how could I have been so blind? This guy had fairly light chocolate brown hair and his skin was rather pale. The more I studied him the more I realized him and Dante had nothing in common apart from their egos'.
"I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else. I really am sorry." I apologized and shook my head in shame and walked back to Charlie who happened to be in the same spot. He stood there looking at me in disappointment and looked down before running his hand through his hair.
"Let's just go to class now before you mistake another guy that looks like a fag to be Dante." Charlie muttered and slipped his hand into mine once again before leading the way to our English Literature class.
****************
"Everyone please turn to page sixty three in your exercise books and complete questions one to five. Once those have been completed start your essays as they shall need to be completed for homework." Miss Shah informed the class and turned around before sitting down on her desk to mark her previous class' work.
I got to work seeing as it would help take my mind of the embarrassing event that occurred in the hallway. Charlie was half through the exercise anyways and so I decided to as well.
I stared at the book and studied the pages and got to work as I began to answer the questions as perfectly, neatly and accurately as I could. Once I have completed them I felt like my hand was going to fall off and drop. I shook my hand and almost smacked myself in the face with it, earning a small chuckle from Charlie beside me.
"Oh shush, don't make me punch you." I giggled quietly making sure I wouldn't be heard my the teacher. I looked outside at the beautiful weather and saw a guy standing out there staring at me.
At first I felt uncomfortable and extremely awkward but then the figure took their jacket's hood off and I felt my jaw drop for the second time today. Oh god, I must be either be missing him so much that I'm hallucinating or he was really outside looking at me.
Dante stood there and stared at me for a while longer and I'm pretty sure he smirked slightly, showing off his famous smirk that I loved. I didn't even realize I had a small blush forming on my cheeks and so I quickly turned and began to tap at Charlie to force him to look outside.
"Charlie look its Dante. He's outside and he's looking our way. Look!" I smiled and felt a slight joy in my heart. He wasn't dead and Jase and I had been the only ones to say this. No one believed us.
While Jase believed it in his head and didn't utter a word out loud, I did, I told our crew that I knew he wouldn't die because Spike's messed up gang needed him as he was vital for their recruiting.
"Haley, I'm getting you home right away, I think you're ill because no one is outside but the janitor." Charlie grumbled and I quickly spun my chair to once again look outside to see he was right. Only the janitor was outside but he was no where near the spot I saw Dante.
"Charlie, I know what I saw and I definitely saw him!" I spat through gritted teeth. It really pissed me off that Charlie didn't believe me and thought I was either going crazy or I was being traumatized from events.
"Ma'am." Charlie raised his hand in the air and once the teacher turned around he replied. "Can I take Haley home she looks like she's about to past out?"
"Oh my god, yes, sure, go ahead." Miss Shah looked shocked and obviously she'd let Charlie do anything because even though Charlie had only been attending the school for two months he had managed to make quite a name for himself and was becoming almost as popular as Dante had been. Only thing was this new teacher was quite young and I think she was in love with Charlie since she may be a paedo.
"Let's go." Charlie picked me up and flung me over his shoulder before picking up both his and my stuff and made his way out of the classroom. "You're really ill to be hallucinating him twice in one day."
"I know it was him, I saw him, Charlie!" I shouted angrily extremely annoyed that he had the audacity to accuse me of being sick. "Why don't you fricking trust me?"
"Because he wasn't there both times!" Charlie complained and put me down so that I was now back on my feet instead of beating his back up so that he would release me.
"HALEY, HE'S FUCKING DEAD! HE BLED TO DEATH AND DIED ON THE SPOT! GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK HEAD! HE IS NO MORE!" He shouted at me and looked like he was about to go and punch millions of thousands of walls and happily continue doing so. "THAT IDIOT ISN'T ALIVE ANYMORE! HE'S GONE, HALEY! GONE!"
"I d-didn't know you felt ... that way." I stuttered doing my best to hold back the tears that were threatening my eyes to let them out. I bit my lip and closed my eyes and took deep breaths. My chest ached and felt like it was being pried open while my head was pounding and made me feel like I was about to drop to the floor any second now.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean-"
"Just drop me off home." I managed to speak before the tears won their battle and ran down my face. The hot, salty tears were flooding down my cheeks and dripping off my chin. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but all that came out were deep, gut-wrenching sobs that tore through my chest and convulsed through my body. I sat down fast, shaking and gasping.
"I can't do this," I choked, rocking and back and forth. "He's not gone but everyone keeps telling me is and I know he may be dead but I have hope you know. That he is out there and alive but I don't know what to think-"
"Shhh." Charlie whispered.
"They tell me not to worry, that they're in heaven, that it was for the best." I drew in a deep enough breath to say, "But it's not the best!" Coughing and gasping and crying, I couldn't stop, not even when I felt Charlie's arm across my shoulders. "It's not."
"Let's get you home." Charlie muttered with an extremely guilty look on his face. He quickly got up and opened up his locker which somehow had happened to be close by and he shoved both his and my work inside before coming back over.
He placed one arm under my knees and the other around my waist before picking me up before he started to carry me to his car. "I'm so sorry."
"Just forget everything." I muttered and rested my head against his chest.
He arrived to his car and placed me on the bonnet of the car before taking his car keys out his back pocket to unlock the car. I jumped off the car and quietly opened the passenger door to get in so that I could be alone for my thoughts for a while even though I probably only had five seconds or so until Charlie got into the car.
It was almost as though I was psychic because a few seconds later Charlie himself got into his car and put the car into the car, turning it on and making it roar to life. He looked over to me and opened his mouth to say something but I simply turned my face and looked out the window. I was in no state to talk to him or anyone for that matter. I didn't want anyone to say anything to me anyone and let me be this depressed and hurt girl who was writhing in emotional pain.
I knew he was staring at me in the corner of his eye but I couldn't help but cry once more, and I knew it was then that I had lost control. In fact I had lost some weight these past few months because I was so depressed and I looked more frail and not that once happy go getter I was.
My body ceased to obey me as it just continued to allow more tears to run down my face and allowed my hands to being to shake uncontrollably, my breaths were short and shallow, my skin burned and your head ached, my nose was red and my eyes itched with the salt.
It felt like a sea of dark emotions churned with no outlet but the sobs, there was nothing but the sorrow and the tears and the sheer unfairness of everything, the cruel exquisite world loomed up above me and there was nothing to do but break down and just let out all of my emotions. I sat back in my chair, sniffling as I choked back the last of the tears, drained and dehydrated but somehow feeling better.
"Hey, we're here." Charlie broke the silence and instantly I sat upright and wiped my tears away. Charlie got out the car and walked around the car to my door. He politely opened it before slipping his hand into mine once more and walked me to my door. "Haley, I'm so sorry."
"It's ok, just forget it." I whinged. "Please, for me."
"Haley, I've loved you since I first saw you as a child. I knew that I only wanted you and no one else. I can't see myself with anyone but you and the fact that you loved someone else killed me inside, but you know what hurt more? The fact that you lost your love and you're dying inside and won't let anyone help you. Haley, you mean so much to me and I can't see you like this, it hurts me and makes me want to go revive the idiot and give him to you so that you can smile again but I can't do that. Haley, let me in and let me help you, I deserve that much. You know what it's like loving someone and losing them so please don't let me lose you." Charlie blurted out all of his feelings and a single tear ran down his face.
His eyes look red and hurt and it was that moment I realized it looked like he had been getting no sleep either these past few months. Not because Dante died because I was dying inside. His arms were rather bruised and his face had the words depressed and rejected all over it.
How could I have been so blind?
I was pushing away all of my family and friends and making myself become alone and unwanted. I threw my arms around Charlie and hugged him tight not planning to let go for a while and his arm instantly wrapped themselves around me too.
"I love you, Charlie." I whispered and hugged a little tighter only for him to pull the hug back a little so that we could see each other's face.
"I love you too." Charlie smiled and before I could even register what was happening, Charlie's lips had found their way on to mine. His lips felt wrong and uncomfortable against mine and I felt partially grossed out. I slammed my hands against his chest and pushed him back while I still stood there in shock.
"What are you doing?" I exclaimed as I finally found my voice to once again speak.
"You told me you love me and I do too so-"
"I love you as my best friend! Nothing more, I'm sorry. I don't love you like that, I love Dante!" I bit my lip holding back even more tears that wanted to come out. I couldn't bare today, there was too much going on. "I love Dante-"
"HE'S FUCKING DEAD!" Charlie snapped. "You love a dead guy, Haley. Why can't you get over him? He's not going to be coming back anytime soon and he didn't even treat you well when you were together. He was a tool and complete dick and you couldn't even see it. Why don't you give us a try and just see how it goes because I can make you smile, Haley." He interrupted and I felt rage surge through my blood. I no longer felt weak and vulnerable but angry and pissed off.
"I suggest you get the heck out of here before I get a chance to murder you before she does." A voice growled from behind Charlie. I looked over his shoulder to see it was a very ticked off Jase standing behind Charlie as his hands were clenched into fists. "Take your lame self and get out before I forcefully do!"
"No, Haley-"
I didn't even have time to say something let alone react but all I saw was Jase storm up to Charlie and grab his collar before pulling him close so he could scare him.
"When I say get the flipping heck out of here what I'm trying to say is fuck off within five seconds or I shall murder you worse than the way I have seen people be killed or worse than the way I have killed before!" Jase snapped and then let go off Charlie before turning around so he could come and walk up to me. "You ok, princess?"
I nodded my head unable to speak and Jase understood that and so he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me close to him so that I could hug him. I loved Jase and was glad that I had him around me all the time because since Dante was no longer around, Jase kept me company while everyone else thought I was just becoming depressed and in a state of 'leave her alone she needs space'. Jase made sure I would smile and laugh and not just look like a suicidal widow.
"Teddy, I'm sorry, it's just-"
"GO!" Jase shouted at him and I hid my face into Jase's chest. I could hear Charlie get into his car and drive off. By the sounds of it he seemed rather annoyed too because it sounded like he was killing his car's exhaust. "Let's get you inside your house."
********************
Jase and I were sitting on my bed just talking about today's events. I was tucked in under my duvet while Jase was sitting on top of it and sat up straight next to me. I had told him about my hallucinations and he told me he thought it was fine to have them because you get them when you miss someone a lot. Plus he said that he thought he had seen Dante yesterday when he had gone to the gym but saw the guy run away when they looked back at him.
"Hey Jase-"
THUD!
"Shush." Jase whispered trying not to make noise but failed.
Instantly Jase and I both jumped out the bed only mine was because I got scared and he jumped off the bed to go an get the baseball bat which I kept by my bed in case of emergencies. The second Jase had the bat in his grasp he turned the tv off placed his finger on his lips telling me to be quiet.
THUD!
"Fuck." A rather deep voice cursed from downstairs almost as though they were knocking over stuff in the living room.
Jase silently crept across the room and opened the door as quietly as he could and so I followed closely behind him.
"If you're coming with me why would you wear that?" Jase gave me a 'are you kidding me look' before shaking his head disapprovingly.
I looked down at my pj's and realized that wearing my short grey pj shorts that was two inches past my butt and my grey olaf tank top was not appropriate if I was being robbed downstairs as I could also be raped. Oh well, Jase was just wearing his white vest and black pj shorts so he didn't look appropriate to give someone a butt kicking either.
"Let's go." I slipped my hand into his as I was rather scared right now because no one was home but Jase and I as Chris had decided to take Juli out on a date and leave me to have 'space' once again.
Jase walked to the stairway with me following close behind and the second we reached the top of the stairs we saw someone at the bottom of the stairs we thought we would never see again. Both of our jaws dropped and I felt myself drop to the floor as I sat there in shock.
His hair, dark and lustrous, could almost have been mistaken for jet black and he had short layered haircut, slightly tapered on the sides and back along with dimples that made his smile stand out, emerald green eyes that sparkled so amazingly, a sexy six pack that was noticeable in most tops he wore and a pretty muscular body. He looked slightly taller than the last time I had seen him and he looked a little more built but at the same time he still looked the same only he had slight stubble on his face.
"Hey guys, this is awkward."