* content warning *
I lay against the floorboards, staring up at the impeccably painted ceiling, trying to ignore the ever-growing pain in my stomach. I'd swallowed down some more water earlier, and though it made the pain more sharp for a moment, it eventually managed to make me feel a little more full and dull the clawing need.
The boys had invited me back downstairs with them after the meeting, but Gabriel vetoed that plan, insisting that we should all take some time to clean up before hanging out later. The way he eyeballed my hair as he spoke with a wistful, needy glint was a little confusing. I guess I looked really bad or something, which made sense, since I felt pretty gross. North started to protest leaving me upstairs alone, but after a hissed reminder that I was a girl (who apparently needed girl time for girly shit) North relented.
I strategically didn't mention that I'd rather have my eyeballs poked out than use the shower, and the rest of the boys had finally agreed with his plan.
We were on the third day of being here, and would be here for at least another four if the rules were anything to go by. If I was honest, I needed to bathe. But I could clean at the sink. I was more concerned about whether I would last that much longer without food. Already I felt weaker than I had in a long time, and so incredibly tired. It was a combination of things, I was sure, but living a waking nightmare made resting seem impossible. Never mind the fact that there was no complimentary breakfast in sight.
I just wanted to lie here until it was over, but I knew that kind of weakness wouldn't get me through this. Besides, I had a feeling North and the others would only stay away for so long. I'd make it, I always did. I guess mother's favoured insult of comparing me to a cockroach wasn't too dissimilar after all.
Instead, I scraped myself off the floor and crept back out of my assigned room. Karen's door was open, and I could see that she was awake, though she sat absently picking at the fabric of her dress, clearly lost in thought. Even when I purposefully shifted to make the floor creak, she didn't glance up. After a moment's hesitation and confirming that the rest of the floor was relatively deserted, I headed quietly into the bathroom between our rooms.
I went straight to the sink, smiling at finding a couple of towels folded neatly in the cupboard beneath it. I selected a dark washcloth, marveling at the soft, luxurious material. All of our towels at home were scratchy and stiff with years of use. When the cloth was dampened with warm water, I started with the most offensive areas - my grimy face, then my armpits, anywhere and everywhere else visible that sweat had accumulated. Considering that the bathroom door didn't lock, I was loath to actually undress, so I decided to just do my hair next.
I flipped my hair over, tucking errant strands into the sink before letting the faucet run over the ends. I had to let the water run hot, almost scalding, in order to free out some of the oil built up at my scalp. Without soap though - and a search of the cupboard and shower revealed none - it wasn't entirely clean by the time I was done. Instead I squeezed out as much excess water as I could before flipping my head back up and beginning the somewhat painful process of finger combing the damp, tangled strands.
There was a creak on the floorboards behind the closed door, but I didn't register it quick enough, as the bathroom door flew open and the handle smacked hard into my back, sending me sprawling. I let out a pained gasp as my hip hit the sink on the way down, staring with wide eyes as first Greg, then Eric, appeared in the open doorway.
"Fancy finding you all alone in here, Sing Song," Greg said, stepping into my space.
He smelled strongly of sweat as he yanked me to my feet and leaned his body against mine, pressing me into the wall. I tried to get my hands between us to create some distance, but he clamped a hand tightly around my wrists and raised my arms above my head.
His free hand landed on my knee, and as he swept it higher, my skirt rose with it, revealing pale skin and the deep purple bruise I'd inflicted the night before. His eyes caught on it, and he smirked, leaning away so Eric could see.
"See Eric, I told you she was into kinky shit." Greg rasped, his breath hot against my neck.
Eric laughed and moved into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. "I see that now. I bet she won't even scream, bitch will probably beg us for it."
I whimpered at their words. I tried to raise my knee to kick at Greg, but the movement was weak and slow. Greg huffed and shoved my leg back down before backhanding me with enough force to make my neck crack painfully and the other side of my face smack into the wall. I felt blood start to drip down my face, but I couldn't tell where it was coming from since everything was hurting.
They spent a little while talking about what they'd do to me - it was eerily similar to the vile things my mother would list when she was teaching me about men and their desires. I could almost shut it out by focusing on the pain, but when Greg started kissing, then licking and biting his way down my throat, I couldn't quite detach myself anymore.
The tears started. They seemed to like that.
I didn't notice Karen until I heard her sharp gasp, and then Eric's pained grunt as he was jostled sideways into the wall by the door, revealing her standing with shaking fists raised in front of her. My stomach sank, but before either of the boys could think about doing anything to her she opened her mouth and screamed for help. Greg and Eric flinched, because that girl sure had a set of lungs on her, but then Eric shoved me back firmly into Greg's arms and stepped out after Karen.
Wil appeared next and didn't hesitate before launching himself in front of Karen and slamming his fist into Eric's face, causing him to reel back as his nose crunched with the impact. Even while howling in pain, Eric went after Wil, getting in a few solid jabs to his stomach, chest and face in return. Despite his bravery, Wil was a lot smaller than Eric and not as used to beating the life out of others, even if it seemed like he was able to take a hit. It was clear he would be quickly overwhelmed.
Greg laughed in my ear, cheering Eric on, his grip tightening on my already bruising hip as his other hand released my shoulder and crept down my chest and started to dip into the top of my dress. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on Karen's viciously screamed threats, anything but what I was feeling.
I couldn't say when the boys arrived - just that several things trickled into my awareness at once. That I could no longer hear Karen past their shouting. At least one sickening crunch, that reminded me again of the sound of a breaking bone. A few scents reaching me and mingling together - musk, leather, spice - made quickly indistinguishable through the tang of blood and sweat.
Greg's hold on me loosened, and without it I slid gracelessly to the floor. I opened my eyes to find that Eric and Greg were being shoved out of the bathroom by several of the downstairs boys.
"If you so much as look at her again, I will make you hurt so badly, that you'll wish you were dead." Nathan's voice was terrifying as he spoke, leveling the two boys with a glare so fierce, there was no way the hatred in his eyes could be mistaken for anything less than savage intent.
Eric looked pale, especially with his bloodied face, and he backed away immediately. Though Greg merely sneered at me, spitting blood onto the ground before us before raising his middle finger in the general direction of the downstairs boys, and swaggering off towards the staircase to return upstairs.
"Apóvrasma," North spat after them, taking a step forward.
Silas placed a restraining hand on North's shoulder, the wrath in his eyes making him look utterly murderous. "Later, adelfós. Not in front of Sang."
"You'll leave them alone, the rules were clear on what would happen if anyone was hurt too severely. Do I need to remind you all of what is at stake? Of what we all agreed to?" Kota hissed, staring down each of his friends until they all acknowledged his words, muttering or shuffling around.
It was clear without being said that we were all thinking of what had happened to Mike. I didn't think the boys would seriously try to murder any of our house mates, but even inflicting any kind of harm seemed too risky after the earlier demonstration of just how severe consequences could be. I realised then that despite Nathan's sincerity, it was an empty threat - it had to be. He couldn't risk actually hurting Greg because of the rules. And worse yet, it seemed that Greg already knew that. He would probably come after me again, but it didn't matter. I didn't think I could stand it if anything happened to them. I didn't want them all to die.
I think I might have made some kind of distressed noise at that thought because suddenly all of the boys were looking at me, their rage slowly simmering away to be replaced by concern and worry.
"Sweetie, come downstairs with us." Kota's voice was exceedingly gentle, but I knew it was more of a command than a suggestion.
His tone didn't bother me though, there was no way I wanted to be alone right now. Gabriel grabbed my hand without waiting for my response, lacing his fingers through mine as he gently tugged me forward.
Nathan, Silas, and North moved into the hallway like body guards, checking every inch of the place before waving us on. The entire way downstairs the boys crowded around me, and though I was still on edge, I couldn't help but feel safe being surrounded by them.
We stopped at the bottom of the staircase, and for a tense few seconds no one spoke a word. I was avoiding their eyes, and they seemed unsure of what to say. Finally, Victor stepped towards me, bending so I could see his eyes clearly even with my bowed head.
"Princess, you're bleeding," Victor whispered sadly.
I pressed my palms to my face, feeling some pain in my lower lip and cheek on my left side, but a more generalized headache forming throughout my skull. When I looked at my palms though, they came away tacky with half dried blood blotted across them.
"Trouble..." I glanced up as Gabriel floundered for words, guilt swimming clearly in his beautiful blue eyes. "Sang... I'm so fucking sorry I suggested separating. We should have been with you to stop that shit before it started. I just didn't want to suffocate you-"
I shook my head quickly, needing to cut him off. "No! It's not your fault. Any of you. I'm so... I'm really thankful you came to help."
Gabriel swallowed heavily. He glanced to the others before looking back at me, his voice more hesitant than before, "what did they do to you before we got there?"
I tugged my dress self-consciously higher on my chest, and stretched it lower on my thighs at the same time, as though I could stop them from seeing Greg's touch. But that just had me thinking about the bite marks that were probably visible on my neck.
And then I was crying in earnest. The kind of ugly, choking sobs that made it difficult to breathe.
The smell of vanilla kept me calm enough to accept Luke's arms wrapping around me as he rocked me through yet another breakdown. I threw my arms around him, crushing us together.
It was Victor's quiet suggestion to use the bath on their floor to get rid of the blood and stave off my shaking that saw me soaking in the hot water, fighting off the lasting tremors of fear and shock. My dress was left on, and Gabriel was quiet as he washed my hair out for me and cleaned my face of blood. Luke didn't let go of my hand.
I emerged from the bathroom some time later, feeling the warmth of the bath all the way into my bones. The hot water had gone a long way towards soothing aches and pains both new and old, but my face still throbbed painfully. The boys had left when the water started to cool. Gabriel had left me with Silas' large dark blue shirt to replace my dress, that when buttoned to the neck completely concealed my chest, and sat longer than the dress had, almost past my knees. I breathed in the scent hanging to the fabric - almost salty, but not like sweat. It was a pleasant yet faint smell that reminded me of an ocean breeze.
I'd rinsed my dress and underthings in the bath and hung them on the towel rail to dry. I guess it was another sign of my unquestioning trust in the boys that I felt comfortable enough to hang out with them wearing nothing - even if Silas' shirt was far more modest than what I'd been stuck in for the last two days.
As I finally left the sanctuary of the bathroom, Victor was leaning against the metal wall beside the bathroom door. He reached out and held my hand, leading me towards his and Gabriel's room where the others had gathered. We settled on the floor, where I slid unconsciously to a familiar position on my knees. I smiled at them all, wanting them to know how grateful I was.
I took a deep breath, squeezing Victor's hand, though I spoke to all of them. "I can't thank you enough for being there for me. I will never forget it, and everything else you've all done for me. But... please don't look at me like I'm completely broken now."
I heard a shuffling noise, and looked up to realise they'd all shifted closer.
"You are not broken, Sang." Nathan said, catching me in his serious blue eyes. "That asshole doesn't have the power to break you."
"You don't have to worry about him anymore, Sang baby. We'll keep you safe." North growled.
Kota sighed at North's words, but he didn't look away from me as he spoke. "I know we can all be overbearing, and we can see you're not ready to process it out loud. We're here whenever you want to talk about it. And while it's fine if you want some space, we're not leaving you on your own like that again. We care about you. You're our friend."
I was at a loss, my heart so full at their kindness. There didn't seem to be anything adequate for me to say to that - especially because proclaiming that I never wanted them to leave me felt too dramatic. But a moment later it no longer mattered.
From the corner of the room came a mechanical whirring noise, clicking sounds issuing through the walls before the sound of metal grinding began. The noise was reminiscent of the sound made when the metal wall shifted to reveal the downstairs staircase.
Our heads snapped over to the mirror embedded within the wall, which was slowly sliding upwards into a cavity above it and opening as we watched.