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"unless you explain to me everything. the real reason why you took me out of the clinic sedated and why you brought me here... only then, i'd be able to sleep."he raised his finger, nervously as he pointed at her.
soon's eyes widened as she felt the nerves growing inside. "h-hyungwon..." she muttered, surprised over his decisive tone.
"please... do not lie to me anymore. what are you hiding?" he asked.
for a second, soon contemplated the possible scenarios if she told him the real truth.
maybe the alters would come out, maybe nam gun would try to kill her this time for good.
maybe she'd hurt hyungwon with the truth, after all, he couldn't remember anything.
"i... - she thought about lie, again, but she knew hyungwon wasn't exactly stupid.
he hadn't believed in her the first time and he wouldn't a second.
"i think... that maybe after that one night stand... i believe you developed feelings for me... deep feelings." she said with care, as if she was trying to explain to a little kid.
hyungwon frowned. "what?"
soon didn't want to admit he was obsessed with her to the point he became her stalker and even the police had been involved in all.
"listen – she raised her hands – i didn't remember any of this either... until i was cleaning my house last weekend and found that picture, i – she sighed, dropping her hands to her thighs and shaking her head – that's when i remembered what have happened." she shrugged.
"i don't know what to say to you." it wasn't far from the truth. all of what she said to him was true.
she was just hiding a big part of it too and she was going to tell him, eventually, when the time was right.
hyungwon remained silent for a few seconds, trying to find some sense into all of it and even trying to remember at least something. "were those feelings... mutual?" he didn't dare to look at her.
soon's silence was answer enough for him. he looked away, clearly ashamed.
"i had a boyfriend back then... we had broken up but- she sighed, closing her eyes – my feelings remained intact. i am sorry." she added.
he nodded softly, as if he understood.
his shoulders rose and fell in a giving up manner. "i understand." hyungwon's lips pressed on a thin line.
"is that the whole truth?" he turned to look at her this time. soon felt her body tensing at his intense stare.
she opened her mouth to say something but then shut it. as an answer, she just nodded.
she hesitated for a second, the expectation almost devouring her. she was counting the seconds to know if hyungwon had believed in her, but apparently, he did.
"well... i am sorry for that as well. i never meant to make you feel uncomfortable." he muttered, laying down on his side. his big hands resting on his stomach, his eyes focused on the wooden roof.
she did the same. "it's okay. it's in the past now." she said softly as she adapted the same position. "are you going to be able to sleep now?" soon's voice echoed softly inside the room after she asked the question.
"i guess i'll try." those were the last words she heard from him. they both submerged in a deep silence, almost palpable. the only noises heard in the room were from the crickets outside of the window and sometimes, the wind.
soon felt her eyelids growing heavier as she felt her mind wandering in different places. she knew she was falling asleep and she knew it wasn't a right thing to do, next to him.
next to someone who suffered from DID, especially when one of his alters wanted to kill her.
but she wanted to trust him so he could trust her as well, and that's when she didn't realize she had fallen asleep until she felt something moving next to her.
her eyes opened in alert as she confusedly held onto the sheets. her heart raced as she tried to sat straight on the bed.
she looked around and when her eyes fell onto hyungwon's space on the bed, she realized it was empty.
in that moment she felt her hands shaking as she looked desperately around, trying to find him. "hyungwon-ah?" she whispered his name in the darkness.
the single lamp over the nighstand on hyungwon's side had been turned off. the whole room was in complete darkness except for the dim light that filtered through the window, the moon's light.
"hyungwon-ah?" she called his name again.
there was a deathly silence in the room and it suddenly grew cold. she felt the nerves growing as her temples began to throb.
"he's not here." a similar voice answered.
soon jumped in the bed as her eyes widened, looking everywhere, trying to find the source of the voice. "where are you?" she asked desperately.
she heard some steps and finally a dark shadow came out of the darkness, discovering his handsome features through the moonlight.
he smirked. "i am sorry i scared you... i couldn't sleep."
"inho." she whispered as she took a hand to her chest, feeling her heart as if was going to come out of her chest.
she swallowed hard. "i thought-
"i know. i am sorry." he said approaching her softly. the steps were slower than ever. he walked with suspense towards the bed. soon stared at him, or at least she tried since the room was dark.
"what are you doing?" she asked.
he remained silent. she could only see his shadow. "i was staring at you... while you slept."
she felt cold shivers running down her spine. "w-why?" she dared to ask. there was something odd about the whole situation.
she knew it was inho. his tone was somehow empathic and even sweet. but the whole feeling of it all was just overall weird.
"because you're fascinating dr. park."
that's how inho used to call her. it was more likely to be him.
somehow she felt more relieved. "i am sorry if i woke you up." he added.
she shook her head. "no. it's fine." she quickly said, her hand reaching for the lamp, but soon a bigger hand stopped her midway.
"i like it better when it's dark."
she swallowed hard. the touch was cold and it felt strange. she felt the nerves growing inside her belly and soon she started feeling nauseas.
his grip on her forearm grew intense when she tried to move away. she chuckled nervously. "i think i need a glass of water-
"why did you lie to hyungwon dr. park?" was the only thing she received as an answer.
he had completely ignored her desire to drink a glass of water. and it's not like she actually needed a glass of water, she just felt nervous of the situation and she needed a place with light.
"w-what do you mean?" she asked nervously.
she felt his silent chuckle. "come on... earlier tonight? he asked you if there was anything else that you were hiding? you said no? remember?" he remained silent, waiting for his answer.
she nodded softly.
"well... you said no when we clearly know that's a lie. there's more, right?" his voice sounded pretty similar to inho's, that's why soon couldn't understand this sudden behavior.
"why are you asking me this? i thought you didn't care about hyungwon." her voice grew with an unexpected courage.
he remained silent for a few seconds, as if he was meditating something. "maybe... maybe you're right, but... i am just curious about why did you lie to him?"
suddenly she started sweating as his grip hardened. "i don't think i need to answer these questions to you – she glanced at his hand on her arm, in the darkness and then back at the lamp on her left – i don't know what are you talking about."
he chuckled, an evil-like chuckle. "please dr. park... we both know you hid some true facts about your past with him... right?"
soon remained silent as she stayed still. she waited when it was the right time and quickly stretched towards the lamp and with her other hand turned it on.
she quickly turned to look at him and noticed his eyes were wide opened, with big dark circles around his eyes. his hair was wet and the way he looked at her was just different than the other times. he looked at her with a devilish look.
it was more than obvious. "nam gun." she whispered in silence as the fear took over her senses.
he grinned.
"ah... i see you can't recognize me in the dark dr. park..." he said with amusement.
her heart raced when she noticed he looked different from close, different from hyungwon and the others. he looked like a heroin addict with emo tendencies.
she felt real fear and for a secon wished to be back in the city, in her cozy apartment and in the safety of her fiance's arms.
she cursed herself mentally. "please let me go." she begged as she tried to open his hand. the hand that was holding her prisoner.
he chuckled. "i don't think so... why did you lie to him? to us?" he asked now, his eyes widened.
soon fought with him, trying to gain her freedom. but hyungwon pushed her out of the bed with a swift move.
she landed on the floor, hitting her legs, elbows and her face partially, but he never let go of her arm. "please let me go." she begged. but he only laughed as if everything was fun. "get up." he demanded.
soon managed to get up after several tries, but nam gun would kick her, making the task more difficult.
when she was finally on her feet, he pushed her against the wall and locked her with his arms. "confess dr. park... tell us everything."
she felt the tears forming on her eyes. lots of feelings were building up inside her.
guilt. regret. fear.
but also anger.
she hated it.
she was angered at the whole situation. somehow she trusted that hyungwon was going to take control of the alters. and even if she trusted her guts. she pictured inho appearing, only him.
not nam gun.
"i am so stupid..." she whispered to hersef, thing that caused nam gun to laugh.
"indeed you are... now tell us. what are you hiding dr. park?"
she really tried to put up a tough image, but she was slowly crumbling down. she started crying without even noticing.
nam gun seemed to be having the time of his life, he found it fun when she started crying and he even began to mock her.
"aww... are you crying dr. park? is this sad? why are you crying?" he asked, pouting like a baby.
"are you afraid? do you think i am going to hurt you?"
soon hated to be crying in front of him, but she couldn't control herself. crying was the only thing she could do.
he chuckled. "well... i'd be if i was you." he finally admitted, tilting his head to the right, staring at her, similar like inho did when they were together.
the similarities between inho and nam gun, sometimes were shocking.
she felt her heart racing. "are you going to tell me dr. park? why is it so hard for you to be honest?" he asked, approaching his face to hers.
"who are you?" she managed to ask. the headache grew with each passing second.
he only laughed. "let's play a game... can you guess who am i?" he asked with a fun expression.
"you're nam gun." she said. he grinned.
"very well... but- he narrowed his eyes – there's more." he added.
she frowned in confusion.
he stared at her for a long second, his face expressions changed suddenly. his eyes revealed something else and she found in them something familiar.
something she had seen before.
something she liked in the past.
"inho..." she said as tears fell desperately from his eyes, running down her cheeks and finally wetting her clothes.
slowly a smirk appeared on his full lips, revealing a triumphal look. as if he had won the biggest and most important lottery.
"woah... i really underestimated you dr. park. i am afraid... i thought you'd never realize."
her eyes widened as the hurtful truth pierced her heart, like a bullet.
"no..." she cried as her cheeks stained with red and salty tears.
she had trusted this alter. she had chose to do it. even if he wasn't conventionally good, she had a connection with him and she had decided to put trust into him.
she had developed feelings for him... for nothing.
"i am sorry dr. park – he pouted – i never wanted to hurt you... - he said narrowing his eyes, moving his head from one side to another, as if he was trying to decide something –well... at least not emotionally." he said at the time his eyes turned into a much darker and wicked thing.
"no-please." she begged when his big hands wrapped around her neck with extreme care. at first he was gentle.
he put his fingers with extreme care as his eyes stared at the whole scene with amusement. "i've been waiting to do this for so long." he whispered as his eyes focused on the exposed skin of her neck.
"come on dr. park... tell me." he insisted.
"tell me i was your stalker back in the university years... that i used to follow you around, everywhere... anytime. i was always there." he said, as he started to put pressure on his hands.
she tried to beg for help, but his strength increased and it made her difficult to talk. "tell me you were scared all the time because you felt followed and watched and nobody believed you. people thought you were crazy... although let me tell you something – he chuckled- you were actually being followed and watched... by us." he admitted with fun.
soon's hands clawed onto his arms, trying to dig her nails to hurt him in some way, hoping he'd let her go.
but his grip grew stronger, he began to show some teeth. "i followed your for months... until it happened – he said as he tried to strangle her – you agreed to go out with your friends and i made sure to be there, in that bar." he admitted with a grin on his lips.
"i knew you'd be there and i made my move... i made progress that night, you agreed to dance with me, to have drinks... until you finally – he didn't finish the sentence, he only smiled.
"but next day... the rejection – he closed his eyes as soon felt her throat burning, she tried to hit him in the face, but he was good enough to dodge the punches – i couldn't take it soonie... it was too much. especially after the great night we both had." he said staring intensely into her eyes, filled with fear.
"that's when it happened. i hated you. my hate began to grow, when i repeatedly looked for you and you kept rejecting me... - he sighed – everything got worse when you went back with kihyun... that's when i knew i couldn't share you."
"p-plea-se..." she managed to say, begging for her own life. she started feeling dizzy as the tears were almost drowning her.
"you had been mine... we spent a great night together. why did you reject me? why? we were perfect for each other. you said it that night!" he said confused and hurt.
soon noticed his eyes were being honest and for the first time she understood lots of things.
she might have talked half asleep and now she was 100% sure that if she said that, she was talking about kihyun and not him.
she couldn't have said that about someone who she met hours ago. it wasn't alright. it was a lie.
he have had it all wrong.
"i am s-sorr-y..." she begged.
he laughed out loud. "sorry? for what? for rejecting me? – he licked his lips – now? after all these years?" soon only nodded. she couldn't speak, her throat was on fire.
he hesitated for a few seconds, as if he was really trying to come up with an answer.
but finally, he shook his head. "no. i don't think so dr. park... soonie... your time is up and now it's too late." he said staring into her eyes as if he was staring into her soul.
"you rejected me and hurt me... and now you're going to pay for what you did."
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