KEIRA’S POV
Three straight weeks and no signs of any of them waking up. The wait is stressing the hell out of me. May mga pagkakataon din na may kung anong nangyayari sa kanila which will be detected by the machines. Sabi ng mga doctor ay hindi naman yun makaaapekto sa kanila pero kahit na ganun ay natataranta pa rin ako everytime na tumutunog ang mga machines na nakakabit sa kanila. It just so happen na kapag nagkakaroon sila ng ganun ay nandito ako sa kwarto nila. Ash even joked about it saying that I’m the reason for those episodes. He’s back to his normal self, alright. I envy him. Tinanong ko nga siya isang beses kung paano niya nagagawa yun and he said, “Come on, Em. I’ve waited for you to wake up for six long years. Ilang linggo pa lang silang ganyan, they need to rest, you know.” Napanganga na lang ako sa sinabi niya kasi pwede namang magpahinga ng hindi nako’coma diba? I just don’t understand how his brain works sometimes.
“Ang lalim ata ng iniisip mo, Big Boss?” Tinignan ko si Cloud na bagong dating lang at nagbuntong-hininga.
“I don’t know kung mao’offend ba ako dun o hindi eh.”
“Yes?”
“Pagkakita mo sakin, nagbuntong-hininga ka. Hindi ko alam kung relieved ka ba na nakita mo ako o disappointed ka dahil nakita mo ako.” Napailing na lang ako habang nakangisi.
“You really are a moron, Cloud. Nasan na si H?”
“He’s outside. Talking to Clark and Xander.”
“What for?”
“I don’t know. Siguro tinatanong niya lang ang mga nangyari habang wala kami. Anyways, hindi ka pa ba uuwi? You need to rest.”
“We’ll go home as soon as matapos yung tatlo sa pag-uusap.”
Tumango lang siya at wala ng ibang sinabi. We just sat there watching Grey, Ran and Titus lying on their beds. Its 9:00 pm at kadarating lang nina Cloud at Hale galing sa bahay. Sila naman ang magbabantay. Usually, umaga nila ako pinapapunta dito sa hospital and I should rest during night time. Si Clark at Xander ang kasama ko magbantay. Hindi pa rin ako sanay na nakikita silang hindi kumpleto. Sa bahay naman, namimiss ko na yung dating sobrang gulo nila kapag nandoon sila lahat.
“Kei, we should go.” Inilahad sakin ni Xander ang kamay niya at inalalayan niya akong tumayo. They always do that simula nang sabihin kong sobrang bilis ng sumakit ng balakang ko everytime na tumatayo ako. My son must be really big dahil sobrang laki na ng tiyan ko na nahihirapan na talaga akong maglakad ng matagal pero I walk everytime I can dahil sabi nila ay makakatulong daw yun sa panganganak. I don’t really get the connection but I still do it. As much as possible, I want to have a normal delivery para walang masyadong restrictions after I gave birth.
“Call us if anything happens, okay? And I mean, anything.”
“Yes, Big Boss.”
Umuwi na kaming tatlo pero habang nasa byahe ay medyo sumasakit ang tiyan ko at napapahigit ako ng hininga. Throughout our way home, I was just drawing circles on my baby bump and silently talking to my son to relax. I don’t know what got him so worked up again. Nang makarating kami sa bahay, si Clark na ang naghatid sakin sa kwarto ko.
“Are you sure you’re okay? Parang ang putla mo eh.”
“I’m fine, Clark. My baby’s just acting up again. Itutulog ko na lang ito so don’t worry. Tell me if Hale or Cloud calls, okay?”
“Sure. Goodnight, Kei.”
“Goodnight, Clark.” He gave me one last smile and went out of my room.
As soon as he closed my door, pumunta na ako sa banyo at nagbabad sa bath tub. Naramdaman ko ang pag relax ng mga muscles ko sa katawan. After my bath, I slipped on to my blue cotton nightdress. As usual, kumuha ako ng isa sa mga damit ni Ran in which I can clearly smell him. It helps me fall asleep and it helps our son relax as well.
Nagising ako dahil sa katok sa pinto ng kwarto ko. I blinked my eyes and saw that it’s still dark outside kaya tinignan ko ang oras sa phone ko. It’s only 2:19 am.
“Kei?” It’s Xander.
“Come in.” Umupo ako at hinintay siyang makapasok ng kwarto ko.
“What is it?”
“Sorry to interrupt your sleep.” I waved my hand dismissively.
“Cloud called. Titus woke up.”
“Really?!? Thank God.” That just made my day.
“Uhh, however -” My smile dropped and I interrupted him.
“Bad news?”
“Of some sort, yes.”
“What is it?”
“Kyran’s having one of those episodes again.”
“Again? I need to see him.” Inalis ko na ang kumot ko at tumayo. I was trying to find my slippers when I felt a very strong contraction.
“UGH, GOD!!” I doubled down because of the pain at napaupo ako ulit sa kama ko.
“Keira! Wha-what’s wrong??”
“Is everything alright here?” I saw Clark entered the room but I couldn’t give two shits as another wave of pain hit me. Napasigaw at napamura ako dahil dun.
“We’re bringing you to the hospital.” Walang anu-anong binuhat na ako ni Xander kaya humawak ako sa balikat niya and gripped it as another contraction came. Jusko, manganganak na ata ako. No, manganganak na nga ako. After I realized that, bigla akong natakot. Hindi ko alam kung bakit.
“I’ll call her doctor and OB.” Clark went out of my room habang inaayos ni Xander ang pagkakabuhat niya sakin.
Hindi ko alam kung lumipad ba si Xander o ano pero namalayan ko na lang na nasa kotse na kami at katabi ko ang OB ko. When our eyes met, she sighed in relief kaya kumunto ang noo ko.
“She’s conscious now, guys. Please drive faster before another contraction hit her.” Wait, I passed out? Tumingin ako sa harap ng sasakyan and saw Clark driving while Xander is on the shotgun seat. Xander’s looking at me and I can see Clark doing the same through the mirror.
My OB started telling me what to do pero hindi ako makapag’concentrate dun dahil sa sakit na nararamdaman ko. This is pure hell. Nakahinga ako ng maluwag ng makarating kami sa hospital ng buhay dahil sa pagda’drive ni Clark. Agad na akong inilabas ni Xander at inihiga sa naghihintay na stretcher.
Hindi ko na nasundan ang mga sumunod na nangyari mainly because I can barely keep myself conscious the entire time. Kinabitan na nila ako ng kung anu-ano but I can barely feel it. Nakafocus lang ako sa tiyan ko. I can clearly feel my son fighting his way out and obviously, he’s oblivious to the fact that it actually hurts me like hell while he’s doing it.
For the next I don’t know how many minutes or maybe hours, I just followed what the people inside the delivery told me to do. When they tell me to breathe, I breathe. When they tell me to push, I push. I might actually sound like a mad woman for my screams but I don’t give a fuck anymore. It still hurts like fuck even though I know that they gave me anesthesia. I don’t even know if it worked or not because honestly, I can clearly feel what is happening down there. I just pushed and pushed until I heard the most beautiful cry in the entire world. My son’s first cry.
After I heard that, call me whatever you want but it seems like all of the pain earlier was gone and all I can feel is exhaustion. Pagod na pagod ako. Pinunasan ng isa sa mga nurse dito sa loob ang pawis ko habang pinapanuod ko ang ginagawa ng doctor/midwife sa anak ko. I want my son. They actually did things that pissed me off. Why do they have to do that to a new born child? I just don’t get it. So after they gave me my son, I glared at them one more time bago ko tignan ang anak ko.
The moment that I looked at him, my heart just melted. Isa na akong ina. It would be perfect if Ran was here. Then I remembered that he had one of those episode again and I can’t stop myself from crying. A lone tear dropped on my son’s cheek and he reacted to it. Ibinaling niya ang ulo niya papunta sakin and I smiled while still crying. Pinunasan ko na ang mga luha ko while still looking at my little angel. Most people would think that new born babies almost looks the same but I don’t think that way anymore. Not after seeing my own son. I can clearly see myself in him combined with Ran’s facial features as well. It’s amazing how our features were combined to make this angel on my arms.
“First baby?” Napatingin ako sa nagpaanak sakin kanina at ngayong nahimasmasan na ako sa mga pinag gagagawa nila sa anak ko kanina, I gave her a grateful smile.
“Thank you and yes, he’s my firstborn.”
“Congratulations. He’s a really healthy child.”
“Thanks.”
“Anyways, I need to ask for some information before you rest. Is that okay or do you prefer to rest first?”
“I’ll do it now. What is it?” She started asking me some information for the birth certificate and I answered. The entire time, I’m just looking at my son.
“Baby’s name?”
“Sinclair Eryx Buenaventura Silverio.” She made sure that she got the correct spelling of his name and then after that, she told me to rest and I did.
~~~
“It’s my turn, you dumbass!” Ash.
“Hindi pa tapos ang sampung minuto ko gago!” Xander.
“Can you two shut the hell up?!” Hale.
Napapangiwi ako everytime na may marinig akong mura mula sa mga bunganga nila. Bagong panganak pa lang si Sin pero puro mura na ang naririnig niya.
Nandito ngayon sa kwarto ko ang tatlong yan habang nagbabantay naman doon sa tatlo sina Cloud at Clark.
“Another bad word in front of Sin and I’ll throw you all out of my room.” Tinignan ko sila isa-isa habang kumakain ako ng binalatan ko ding apple kanina. Masyado silang abala sa anak ko at hindi nila ako matulungan sa pagkain ko. My God, these guys.
I actually asked my doctor if I can stay at my room in this hospital as well which is the room being used by Ran and the others pero sinabi niya na hindi yun magandang ideya. Baka daw makasama kay Sin. Ah, yeah, I decided to call my son Sin from his first name Sinclair. The guys said that ‘Sin’ has an unusually powerful sound to it and they all think that it’s a cool nickname so there you go.
It’s been two weeks since I gave birth and Titus has been awake for two weeks now. Ran and Grey are still in the same condition. Sinabi ng doctor na pwede na akong makalabas ng hospital bukas.
Napag-usapan na namin na hindi muna ako pupunta ng hospital and take care of my son at home. Hospitals are not really suitable for babies na wala namang problema. I was hesitant at first dahil ibig sabihin ay hindi ko madadalaw sina Ran pero napapayag din naman nila ako. I know that it’s for Sin’s sake.
“Now, you made him cry, make him stop.” That was Hale and Ash is holding Sin. Sinubukan ni Ash na patahanin si Sin pero makalipas ang ilang minuto na iyak pa rin ito ng iyak, they helplessly looked at me and I gave them a straight face.
“Come on, Em.”
“Akin na nga.” Tumayo na ako at lumapit sa kanila. As soon as kinarga ko si Sin, tumahan na ito at agad na binatukan ni Hale si Ash.
“Why is that that everytime you hold him, he cries?” That’s true. Hindi naman palagi pero most of the time, umiiyak talaga siya kapag si Ash ang kumakarga. Hindi ko din alam kung bakit kaya naman kapag pumupunta sila dito, si Ash ang huli nilang pinapahawak kay Sin.
“Guys, ayos na ba ang discharge papers ko? Gusto ko ng iuwi si Sin.”
“Yeah, sabi ng doctor, bukas ka pa lumabas pero kung gusto mo, pwede namang ngayong araw na.” Hale.
“Really? Kung ganun, uuwi na kami ngayong araw.”
“Okay. I’ll go tell the doctor.”
“Thanks.”
Inayos na nina Xander at Ash ang mga gamit ko dito sa hospital habang nilalaro ko lang si Sin. Normally kasi, tulog lang siya kaya naman kapag gising siya ay nilalaro ko siya.
Hapon na nang makarating kami sa bahay. Syempre dumiretso kami sa kwarto ko. Pinakuha ko lang sa mga kasama ko yung crib sa kwarto ni Sin at dinala yun sa kwarto namin ni Ran. Though I doubt na magagamit niya yun. I prefer to sleep next to him at may sapat na space ang kama ko para saming dalawa.