They allowed me to see him last night and I do not know even where I should begin.
When I first entered the room I told myself to expect the worst. I did not bring the sword with me. I did not want to use it and leaving it behind was a ridiculous attempt to pretend that it did not exist. Everyone had been very quiet regarding Leviathan, only ever telling me that he was healing well and that I would get to see him in due time. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine this—
He is human.
It struck me like lightening, the second my eyes fell on him.
Human. Entirely human.
It is a pure miracle; there is no more I can really say to describe it aside from that. Michael was all smiles when I entered the room. "Adonai felt that you might like your prayers to be answered this way, rather than through words—" He did not get to finish speaking before I was hugging him and crying my thanks into his strong shoulders.
I was still hiccupping, barely able to breathe past my blubbering, when I pulled away from Michael and turned to really look at him. My love. My Leviathan.
It is a visual thing, being human. It is not that Leviathan has become less attractive or even that his charisma has dimmed; rather it is something from within him—the existence of a soul where there once was none. A flicker of what I once was recognized the burning of a soul inside of him, the pulsing of an individual essence that was purely him and purely of Adonai's design.
I stepped forward, stopping at the edge of his bed. I wanted to touch him, to hold his hand, but I was afraid I'd break whatever spell this was. I was too terrified of waking up. "How?" I breathed. "How is this possible?"
Leviathan leaned forward with a groan and pulled me forward so that I was sitting on the edge of the bed next to him—something that would have been a scandalous thing if we were a normal human boy and girl. Which now, maybe, we were. Something in my chest clenched, hope rallying in my bones, wishing to take flight.
He smiled at me, the gesture so easy, so natural, and yet so different. He was a new creation. "When I went into the chapel to find you, I prayed. I spoke to Adonai for the first time in decades, centuries even. I wanted you to live. But..." he glanced at Michael, "but it wasn't just the prayer that accomplished it. I think, maybe, you did it. At least partially."
I turned to look at Michael. "How so?"
"The residual part of your angelic nature kept him on the brink."
"I don't understand."
"Leviathan should have died in that chapel, in fact, I think he probably came very close, but you saved him. Adonai let you save him. When he grew too weak your ability to take pain away took the demonic stain from him. You left him renewed and, it appears, human."
"Which is why I was able to get us out of the chapel," Leviathan reached up and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Because you kept me from dying. You kept my body numb. Even if you didn't realize you were channeling the pain, you were. You felt the fire for me. You shielded me."
I let that sink in. I couldn't remember being rescued from the fire, only waking to see Leviathan crying over top of me. I knew that Adonai had done all of that. He had led Leviathan to find me, led Leviathan into the flames and then used me to get us both out. My heart swelled with a new emotion.
"And now you're human. Like me?" I whispered. "Adonai made you human."
He nodded.
I shook my head. "I don't believe it."
Michael grinned. "Why not?"
"Because I made a deal with Adonai. I told him I would trade my life in heaven so that I could save Leviathan from ending up in hell. I still owe Adonai my promise." I swallowed and closed my eyes. "I have to fulfill my end of the bargain. I haven't done what I said I'd do." I looked at Michael, prepared to see him nodding, prepared to hear his condemning message from heaven, but he only smiled at me.
Michael looked between the two of us. "Leviathan told Adonai that he would trade his life on earth so that he could save you. It seems as if you met each other in the middle. Now," he stood up and offered Leviathan his hand. The two men shook and Michael nodded to me. "You both have a lot to talk about, I'll be right outside if you need me." He kissed my forehead and gave my shoulder a squeeze before leaving us alone together.
The room fell silent.
I closed my eyes and inhaled a shaky breath. "This is all some dream. I am going to wake up and it will have all been a dream."
"I've spent the last week pinching myself." He took my hand in his. "I assure you, it is not a dream."
I looked at him. "Promise me? Promise me that I don't have to kill you."
His smile was wide and grateful. "I promise."
I am alive and Leviathan is human. I glanced sideways to find him watching me, his dark eyes searching my face. "Did—" he licked his lips and started again, "Did he hurt you, after I was shot? I worried... I thought..." His gaze darted to my clenched fists and he straightened. "Cassiel, please tell me you weren't—"
"Rosalie got there in time," I said. "I am untouched." I found it hard to say, hard to put a crisp label on something I felt was still tearing me apart inside.
Leviathan's eyes didn't waiver from my face as he said, "But you would tell me if something had happened, wouldn't you?"
I nodded.
He exhaled.
It was my turn to ask questions.
"Are you hurt? Everyone keeps telling me that you're healing and that you're fine," I glanced down at the thick white bandages wrapped around his torso.
He was shirtless, covered only by the sheet and the layers of cloth covering the bullet wound in his chest. It had been some time since I'd seen him like this, seen the strength of his arms, the muscular curve of his shoulders. Before, there would have also been wings, big black and grey wings. I wondered if his back would show the marks of their removal. The pillow covered the area and I was too afraid to ask.
He followed my gaze and if he knew I was thinking of his wings, he did not mention it.
"I'm on the mend. The first day or so was absolute hell," his face heated and he gave me an apologetic look as if he was only remembering that I was a lady. "It is a miracle that I am here. Sariel has worked tirelessly to keep me as comfortable as possible. But I was still shot. There will be scarring, in many different ways, I think. But that is something to think on later. I've slept a lot, this is my first day really feeling well enough to see you. Although, Gabriel has been keeping me updated." His lips pulled up into a soft smile. "I'm so happy you're alright."
"This changes so much." I brought my knees up to my chest and leaned into him. "I—We can have a life. We could—" I hesitated.
His fingers intertwined with my own and he said, "We could what?"
I shook my head. "We can talk later. You just became human, everything is new and I don't want to overwhelm you with my girlish nonsense. It's for another time."
Leviathan tightened his hold on my hand and lowered his voice to a whispered. "But I want to know now."
I turned so that I was facing him fully. "Well, the whole world has just opened up. All the things I always thought I couldn't do, couldn't have—"
"Like?" His smile was contagious.
"We could travel the entire world. Tour art museums and attend fancy dinners." I felt my face heat as I added, "We could court, maybe even get married."
"All of this," he said, "and I only get a 'maybe'?"
"Well, we should do things traditionally. The human way."
"But I've loved you for eons."
"You've loved Cassiel for eons."
"And you're Merritt." He said quietly.
I nodded. "I'm Merritt."
"Very well, Miss Holbrook, if you wish to be courted, courted you shall be."
I shivered at the words. "I love the sound of that."
"And after we've courted and, maybe, married?"
"You must have things you've always wanted to do but couldn't," I said. "What do you think we should do?"
"I've always liked the idea of living out away from it all, having my own land with my own family and my own, well, everything. The city...it is exhausting."
"Then we will find somewhere far from the city."
"After we've toured the world of course." He said.
I couldn't help but smile as the tentative warmth of hope welled within me.
"Yes," I whispered, "only after we've toured the world."