Monday morning. It's a fresh day on a fresh week. Kate left to go back to Liverpool yesterday evening so today everything has fallen back to normality, which in this dead-end town means being bored out of your brain with absolutely nothing to do. As it's summer and exams are over, I decide to hit up the gang to see what they're up to. I had texted both Nao and Alana on Saturday just to quickly assure them all is good after leaving them abruptly in the bar but I haven't spoken to them properly since Friday night.
Having dialled Nao's number, I patiently wait for her to pick up the call and after a few rings she finally does.
''Heyyy," she answers in an upbeat tone.
''Hi Nay, you alright?''
''Sound yeah. What's up?''
''Literally nothing, that's why I was calling actually. Can I come over to yours?''
''Course. My parents are home but they're leaving for a business trip soon so should be 'right. I'll call Ally, yeah? Tell her to come over too?''
''Yeah, can do.''
''You can finally tell us what happened Friday," she says in a slippery voice, I can practically hear the smirk formulating.
''Mmm, we'll see," I coyly reply, "alright so I'll see you in a bit!''
''Sinnabit!''
Clambering off my bed and over to my mirror, I check my appearance to make sure it's fit for public viewing. After fixing some stray curls back into place and spritzing myself with a few squirts of perfume, I pull on my classic black and white Vans, hook my bat-winged backpack over my shoulder, and head downstairs. As I'm hitting the last few steps, I see my Dad striding out of the living room doorway and into the hall.
''Hey, Dad? Can you do me a favour?''
''I'm headed off to work, love. What is it?" he replies grabbing his car keys from the side.
''Can you drop me off at Nao's on the way please?''
''Only if you're ready to go right now.''
I nod firmly, remembering to tap the pocket of my shorts to make sure I have my house keys, and within the minute we're exiting through the front door and sliding into the front seats of my Dad's car.
Once we've pulled off the driveway and are travelling down the congested Llandudno streets, a thought pops into my head.
''Dad, can I book my driver's test? Uncle Kieran says I'm more than ready.''
''Hmm, does he now? I don't know, Cherry. You've not had a lesson in ages.''
''I know but I only need a refresher and Kieran took me out not too long ago for that, plus I was thinking you and I could go for a drive. Then you'll see how much I've improved.''
He ponders for a moment, keeping his eyes on the road and his face neutral as not to give away any clues of what he's thinking.
''Alright. I'm not working tomorrow. We'll go out for a spin then but I'm not making any promises about your test just yet.''
''Okay," I say calmly but deep down I'm buzzing with excitement.
I can't wait to show my Dad how good I've actually gotten at driving. The last time he took me out for a lesson was months and months ago and I know I've definitely improved vast amounts since then, Kieran seems to think so too. Plus I've been studying The Highway Code like a madwoman to limit the risk of failing the theory part of the test, that can only go in my favour.
We eventually reach Nao's obnoxiously grand house and I head over to the front door to alert her to my arrival. She opens the door, notices my Dad - who has been waiting for me to safely be inside before leaving - and they give each other a little wave before he drives off and Nao and I step inside.
Without needing asking, I slip my shoes off and neatly place them on the shoe rack before Nao and I walk through to the kitchen at the end of the hall.
''Ally not here yet?" I ask as my socked feet slide on the cold marble floor.
''On her way, her brother's gonna drop her off," she replies as we approach the very open planned large kitchen.
Inside occupies her always smartly dressed father. He is sat at a rectangular glass table, typing away on his expensive phone, barely looking up as Nao and I enter the room.
''Hey Mr Joshua," I say with a warm smile.
''Oh hi, Cherry, how are you?" he says, looking away from his phone for briefly 3 seconds before dipping back down to bury his nose in his phone.
''Yeah, good, thanks," I answer as plainly but politely as possible.
I know he's probably not really interested anyways, he's far too busy for idle chit-chat.
Just as I've finished speaking Nao's Mum begins to speak from another room, capturing our attention.
''Naomi, I don't want any silly nonsense while we're away. No parties. And I don't want-" she pauses her speech and her movements as soon as she walks into the kitchen and notices my presence, "oh, hello there, Cherry. I didn't know you were here.''
''Yeah, sorry. I just got here. You look lovely," I say meeting eyes with her across the kitchen island.
''Oh, thank you," she replies, brushing her red skirt with her palms and concealing a blushed smile.
''Anyway, Naomi, listen. I don't want any parties. Three friends over, max. And I don't want you ordering takeaway food in, there's plenty of decent food in that fridge, just apply yourself and cook something.''
Nao holds her hands up in mock surrender and I chuckle under my breath.
''Honey, would you mind putting our bags in the car? We need to leave here within the next 15 minutes if we're going to skip all the traffic," Nao's Mum says to her Dad as we stand awkwardly at the kitchen counter.
He moves to his feet, slipping her phone into his blazer pocket before heading out of the room.
''Oh that reminds me!" her Mum says, throwing her hands in the air before darting out of the kitchen, leaving Nao and I alone.
''Sorry about them, they're always super stressy when they're preparing for work trips.. which is like always, so yeah," Nao says walking over to the fridge and pulling out a pitcher of orange juice and pouring it into two glasses for us.
''It's cool, no worries. All parents have their faults, just look at mine," I jest with an exaggerated expression to try and make her feel better or at least make her laugh.
She hands a glass of juice over to me while offering me a smile. It must be hard for Nao being an only child whose parents are away more often than they're not. A lonely life if nothing else. That's why we've always had such a strong connection - other than the fact we're the most compatible pair in our friendship group - we're basically like sisters. We've always been able to rely on each other for company, support, love; friendship. I sense the isolation she must feel being in this huge house alone with no siblings to keep her company - her parents won't even allow her a pet because they're so house proud - so I make sure I include her in as much stuff as possible and vice versa. We both appreciate it.
''Oi oi," Alana's lively voice calls as she enters the kitchen.
We turn our heads to see her striding towards us with a jovial demeanour. We greet her as she occupies her own space beside me at the kitchen island and Nao pours her a glass of juice.
''Your Mum let me in, by the way, I didn't just break in," Ally jokes and I find humour in the way she felt she had to explain.
''Yeah, I figured mate," Nao replies, also tickled.
After a few minutes, Nao's parents re-enter the kitchen to alert us - mainly Nao - that they're leaving and give her hugs and her Mum again reels off her imaginary list of what Nao is absolutely not allowed to do while they're away. As soon as they've left the room Nao playfully rolls her eyes and seconds later the noise from the front door shutting echoes around the house.
''Wanna go outside while it's nice?" Nao says as we look at each other, awaiting our next move.
Once we've cleared the kitchen and are walking through the glass doors of the huge conservatory, Nao speaks again.
''So Chez, I take it Kate's left now?" Nao asks as we enter the garden and spread out on fancy lounge chairs.
''Yeah, she went back last night. She actually told me to tell yous thank you for a really great night.''
''Aw bless her, she's dead cute, ain't she? I wish she lived here y'know.''
''Me too. I mean, she'd hate it here but..''
''She'd fit right in with us then," Alana quips and we share a giggle before we settle in the sunshine.
With my eyes, I follow a beautiful white butterfly dance across the sky ahead of us before it goes too far into the distance and I lose sight of it. Nao stretches out her long legs as her dark glowing skin - only which a very slight portion of is covered by a floral skirt - soaks in the sun's warm rays. I push my sunglasses back up my nose as I tilt my head back and feel the heat radiate off my own skin.
''Fuck, it's hot innit? Should've put on some sun cream. I'm gonna be a tomato by the end of the day. Anyways, what's up gang?" Alana rambles, positioning herself on her side in order to look at Nao and me.
''Not a lot, to be honest," I reply, while swatting a fly away with my hand.
''Well you say that Cherry but I'm guessing otherwise," Alana says, a deep smirk developing on her face.
''What?" I say through a confused laugh and a small frown.
''Well something must have gone down when you and Mr eyelashes disappeared into the night together last week.''
''Oh my God," I utter, placing my hand to my face, finally realising what she's alluding to.
''Oh yeah, I almost forgot!" Nao perks up, straightening herself in her seat so she's sitting upright and lifting her sunglasses off her face to rest in her hair, "go on, tell us the goss.''
''There really isn't a lot to tell," I say, feeling my face reddening, trying but failing to style it out.
''Bollocks," Ally interjects and Nao lets out a laugh.
I sigh deeply, avoiding eye contact with them both as I look out into the garden.
''It's not even a big deal, it was just.." I clear my throat, preparing to drop the bombshell, "I mean.. Van and I had sex.''
''I fucking knew it!" Nao explodes, throwing her head back as a huge grin sets in.
I sense Alana's happy surprise too but I decide to keep my gaze fixed on anything but their faces.
''Oh my God, this is so amazin'," Nao continues, clapping her hands together as if to celebrate.
''To be honest with you, I thought yous had been shagging months ago but.." Alana smirks and I can't tell whether she's joking with me or not.
''Ally, for God's sake," I say bringing my glass of juice up to my lips to try and conceal my reddening cheeks.
''So how did it happen? Like, y'know, who made the first moves and stuff," Alana quizzes as I finally turn my head to look her in the eyes - keeping my shades on of course.
''I don't really know? I guess both of us? It's like one of those things where it was kind of overdue so it wasn't really clear who was initiating what. We just knew it was gonna happen. We went outside the bar and started kissing and then Van took me back to his and it just kind of happened.''
''What was it like, y'know, the mood?" Nao asks, intrigue blanketing her features.
I should have known my mates would want me to go further into detail than my sister and cousin did.
''Yeah, like crazy and drunken, romantic, kinda shit, or what?" Ally reiterates and I chuckle a little.
Humming and hawing for a moment, I try to find the right words that accurately depict the night's events.
''Umm, I guess it was kinda messy? But, like, good messy, y'know? At least at first anyways when we were kissing and taking clothes off and stuff. We just kind of went for it, not really any foreplay or whatever. But when it actually started happening the mood kinda changed. I don't know it kinda went from a lil chaotic to like.. focused? Like, somehow he seemed to know exactly what to do even though he's never touched me like that before. But yeah, It was good, felt amazin', actually.''
I purposely avoid mentioning the issue with Van to the girls. The last thing I want is to embarrass him further or make a big deal out of it. Besides everything prior to that moment did feel amazing.
''Shit, that sounds hot as fuck. Who knew Mr eyelashes would be so good in bed," Alana states and I feel my skin getting heated again.
''Ahh, oh my God, Chez, this is such cool news. I'm made up for you man," Nao gushes, lightly clapping my leg.
''Thanks?" I say with a laugh and a small frown, wallowing in my awkwardness.
''We need to celebrate this. Let's go pub tonight?" Nao proposes, looking between Alana and I.
''I can't. I have a driving lesson with my Dad tomorrow, I can't be hungover. Plus, why on earth do we need to celebrate this? I know it's been a while for me but..?" I say, ending on a chuckle.
''I don't know, any excuse to drink, innit? Another time, though, if you can't.''
''Yeah.. so, you know all about my Friday night. What did yous two get up to?" I ask, deciding it's time the attention is directed at someone other than me.
''Alana pulled," Nao says, with a smirk aimed at Ally which insinuates to me there's more to what she's saying than meets the eye.
''Did yer?" I reply, excitedly, wondering what exactly happened and how it's taken this long for anyone to tell me.
''Oh God," Alana starts, throwing her eyes up to the sky, as though she's reliving a memory she'd rather forget, "yeah, I kinda did. It was so awkward. So there was this girl, right, and she kept dancing right beside me and at first I wasn't arsed because I thought she was just being friendly and everything but then she kept trying to touch my waist and shit and it was freaking me out. Like, she was beautiful. Redhead, had a gorgeous outfit but, y'know, I'm not a lesbian, I don't need you trying to feel me up. In the end I had to just tell her. I was like 'yo I'm not interested' and she finally got the message but, like, it's bad enough having guys grinding against you, when the girls are at it too it's just too much.''
''Wow," I reply, slightly stunned by the information I've been given.
''I know. Kinda killed the mood a little. We left not long after anyways," Nao adds.
Sometimes I forget the girls aren't as openminded as I like to be. Not saying they're homophobic or disrespectful but I just think they don't quite realise what it's actually like to not be straight in a town that judges a person for literally everything. It probably took a lot of guts for that redhead girl to physically flirt and dance with Alana, though I'm not saying Alana owned her anything because of it, I'm just saying it isn't easy living in such a closedminded judgmental place when you just want to be free and liberated. I just hope Ally and the girls weren't rude to her for just being who she is. Instead of lingering on this uncomfortable topic for too long, I decide to change direction.
''D'you go Maccies?" I ask, knowing it's tradition for the youth of Llandudno to pile into McDonald's after a night out. It's the only place that's still open at 4am.
''Mmm-hmm. We saw Keenan in there, y'know the one whose twin sister got pregnant in Year 10?''
''Oh my God, I haven't seen him in forever," I add, a surprised smile formulating on my face.
''Right? He was saying he's a builder now at his uncle's work.''
''He looks so good, Chez. He's got mad muscles now," Alana chimes in, touching her biceps.
''No way. I never thought Keenan would be one of those hench lads," I reply as Alana's phone dings in her pocket and she fishes it out.
''Honestly, he was always so scrawny. I thought he'd be one of those lads that permanently looked 14," Nao says before taking a sip of juice as I elicit a chuckle.
In the lapse in conversation, my eyes fall to Alana who is silently staring at her phone screen with a serious expression etched onto her face.
''You alright, Al?" I ask, which causes Nao to direct her attention to Alana too.
Alana lifts her head and looks across at me like I've interrupted her train of thought.
''Uhh, yeah," she replies as though she had no intention of being convincing.
''What is it?" Nao asks.
Alana pauses for a second.
''I just got this text from Louis and.." her speech trails off as she sighs and just holds the phone over to us.
Nao takes it out of her hand and begins to read the text aloud.
"'Hey babe'," she starts, pausing immediately to share a look with me. I roll my eyes before she continues.
'''Fancy coming Burger Bay with us? Would be amazing to see you' and he's put 2 kisses at the end," she finishes, dropping her arm into her lap.
''Ugh, what a wanker," I grimace, "as if he's trying to take you to the same place he took 'whatsherface' he was two-timing you with. Absolute scumbag.''
''He's a cheeky bastard. I mean, like, really?" Nao says holding her hand out in front of her with an expression that can only be described as severely unimpressed. I've got to say, I absolutely understand her.
We look at Alana, expecting some sort of reply from her. Instead, she sits silently looking at the abandoned phone lying lifelessly in Nao's hand.
''You okay, Al?" I ask, the sound of her name pulling her from her thoughts.
''Huh? Yeah, yeah I'm good.''
Nao and I look at each other, concern etched into our expressions.
''Talk to us, mate," Nao encourages.
Alana shrugs her shoulders and avoids our eyes as she chooses her next words. When the words fail to surface, I speak instead.
''Wait, you're not actually thinking about going are you?" I ask, hoping she'll shut down that idea instantly and put my mind at rest.
Her lack of words give her away and I sigh to myself in disapproval.
''Ally, no. Mate, he's a piece of shit. He was seeing a girl behind your back," Nao contends, forcing Alana to look up at her.
''I know. But maybe I could still go, just to see what he says about it," Alana utters, though despite what she says, no one is convinced she wants to go for any reason other than simply just wanting to.
''No! He doesn't care about you. He doesn't care that he treated you like shit and hurt your feelings. Whatever he'd say would just be some line he'd spin just to get you back on side," Nao asserts.
''But what if there's a misunderstanding? Everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt, no?''
''Absolutely not! Not people like him anyway. Cherry, will you talk to her!" Nao frustrates, switching her attention from Alana to me.
I sigh deeply, taking the more levelheaded approach instead of letting my initial reaction get the better of me. Obviously, everything Nao has said is 100% true. I completely agree with her yet I can't help but empathise with Alana. I know exactly how she feels; I've been in a position very similar with Luke. Through personal experience, I know how annoyed and disgusted you become with yourself when you want something you know you shouldn't. You hate yourself for it. Despite knowing it goes against everything you stand for, sometimes you still have feelings for someone who's treated you bad and it fucking sucks.
Plus, when you're already conflicted and disappointed in yourself, it doesn't help to have people making you feel worse by airing their judgement. You need friends in these moments of insecurity; you need kindness and support. Having said that, you also need someone who, in the best possible way, is going to make you realise you're being an idiot. I guess that's where Nao and I come in. We have a solid good cop bad cop routine going.
Sighing to myself a second time, I decide it's time to speak up.
''Alright, look. I'm gonna be real with you," I start, looking directly at Alana. She nods her head in acknowledgement, her eyes all wide and unblinking.
''My personal opinion? I don't think you should go. In fact, I think you should cut all ties with Louis completely. You don't need that bullshit in your life, Al. How anyone could treat someone as class as you like that is beyond me. You're worth so much more than him and I know that you know this, which is why you've got me wondering why you were even entertaining the idea of meeting up with him in the first place?''
''I don't know, I just.." Alana starts but cuts herself off, looking up at the sky and wriggling her hands around, displaying her unease, "I see you guys with your boyfriends. You both look so genuinely happy and have all these cool experiences and stuff and, I don't know.. I just wish I had that, y'know? I wish I had a person that was my person.''
She suddenly looks bashful, like she's told us a secret she never intended to reveal. The look on her face makes my heart ache. It's a hard pill to swallow finding out your best friend is lonely to the point where she's willing to get involved with someone who's already hurt her just to fill a void in her heart.
''If you wanna go out with Louis then you can," I say out of nowhere, cutting into the quiet.
I cop the attention of both the girls, though each of their expressions they fire back at me couldn't be more different.
''Cherry, what are you saying?" Nao bites back as Alana stares at me with wide eyes.
''I still don't think you should but if you genuinely want to then.." I throw my hands up in the air, using an action instead of words to make my point, "I just don't think you should give yourself up to the first guy that comes along just because you're lonely. You deserve somebody better and they will come along when they're supposed to, you just have to be patient and trust it will happen. I made the mistake of trusting the first guy that swept me off my feet and look how that ended. Maybe if I'd been less naive and more patient I never would've fell in with Luke. Maybe I even would've met Van sooner. Who knows. I just, I don't want you to get hurt like I did.''
I feel both Nao and Alana look at me as though I've never spoken so wisely in my life and suddenly catch myself, remembering I shouldn't be giving too much away or acting like a know-it-all. I note Alana's downcast expression as my words are absorbing. Worrying I've made things worse, I quickly shoot a glance across at Nao. I catch her already looking at me with a slight worry line in her forehead before she realises I can see her and instead gives me a small smile for reassurance.
Not able to take the weird awkward silence, I find myself opening my mouth yet again.
''Plus," I start, causing Alana to join Nao in looking at me, "I know you respect yourself enough not to let any man treat you like a twat and especially not Louis Farris, who, let me remind you, once dived fully into the school skip bin because his mates dared him to.''
With that, both Ally and Nao's faces break into a smile as the atmosphere is immersed in small chuckles, diminishing any weirdness.
''I know you're not letting that guy get to you," I smile through my words in hopes that my use of humour will start to cheer her up.
''Shit, you're right. I forgot all about that," Alana says.
''That was the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my life," Nao chimes in, causing us to again fall into giggles.
''Exactly.''
Alana sighs deeply, but this time, I sense her hopefulness. It's as though a Louis-shaped weight has been lifted from her at last. Well, that's what I hope at least.
''Y'know what?" she starts, sitting up straighter and looking Nao and I dead in the eyes, "I actually couldn't care less about Louis, I just wanted to feel wanted. But, like you say, I shouldn't just go for anybody, I have to wait for the right guy. Someone who actually wants me and is gonna act like it. I'm done with Louis.''
''So you're not gonna go out with him?" Nao inquires, testing the waters with a soft tone.
''Am I fuck. Also this literally just occurred to me and no offence to yous but what would be the point in getting a boyfriend right now. I'm gonna be leaving town soon and I'm not dicking about in no long distance relationship.''
''Fair point," Nao says with a shrug and I nod along in agreement.
''Also, there's probably loads of fit lads in Sheffield. I mean, just look at Arctic Monkeys. Every single one of 'em, fit," I say and I watch Alana's face form a smile at my words.
''True! What an excellent point, Cherry," Nao chimes in as we fall into laughter.
A/N
Sorry I suck lol. Hope you're all well x